


California On My Mind

by justmagnusbane



Series: California Dreamin' [1]
Category: Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types, Shadowhunter Chronicles - Cassandra Clare, Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: (not malec tho), AU, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, M/M, Mentions of Past Attempted Rape, Road Trip, Sexual Content, Smut, eventual izzy/clary, please head these warnings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-22
Updated: 2016-08-29
Packaged: 2018-07-16 14:37:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 27
Words: 110,333
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7272139
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justmagnusbane/pseuds/justmagnusbane
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Before Alec knew it, Magnus had captured his lips. Alec gasped but immediately allowed himself to relax into the kiss, sinking into the safety of Magnus’ arms, and kissing him back. He basked in the moment, praying that he would remember every detail, knowing deep down that there was a chance this would be their last time.</p><p>The last time he might kiss the man he loved."</p><p> </p><p>Alec's not sure how, but Izzy always manages to get her way. So when she decides to go on a road trip with a bunch of virtual strangers he is powerless to stop her. One of said strangers happens to be Magnus Bane, who manages to catch Alec's eye immediately.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. "Who wants to go on a road trip anyway?"

**Author's Note:**

> I do not own these characters, they belong to the rightful owners. The plot it all mine though.
> 
> This is my first fanfic on AO3 (I have a few on fanic.net) and my first fanfic for the Malec pairing. This is pretty Malec heavy but does include lots of Saphael and a fair amount of Clizzy. It is set in LA. Alec is 24, Magnus is 25. 
> 
> You'll have to excuse my lack of knowledge about the states since I'm from the UK, not the US. 
> 
> Enjoy

Really, it was ridiculous for Alec to care as much as he did. It was no longer a shocker to be teased relentlessly by his siblings when growing up in their company had been full of mockery to begin with. But these comments were the ones that seemed to always cut deeper than the others. 

It started when Alec was 16. Jace, his younger brother, then 14, was always eager to bend the rules and Alec was quite the opposite. However, Alec’s brother also had a way with words, and bearing those two things in mind, Jace often convinced Alec to toy with the rules too. They had only been young and the entire situation wouldn’t have even occurred were it not for Alec’s own stupidity. 

As the oldest brother, it was Alec’s job to protect his siblings and it seemed that whenever his siblings attempted to take over the role of protector, they simply got Alec even further into trouble. So that was what had happened when Alec and Jace had gotten into trouble- deep trouble. Maryse and Robert, their parents, had been visiting relatives in Indris when Jace had decided to traipse through the internet with his newfound freedom. Needless to say, Jace being Jace had managed to find some inappropriately themed “documentary” – if you could call it that. It was at that moment that Alec had truly begun to realise that as pleasing as they appeared to be to Jace, boobs were not his thing. 

And they were also not his parents. 

When they had found the search in their internet history, they had immediately confronted Alec, who, at 16, was the most likely culprit. Jace had attempted to get his parents to lighten up on the older boy by making a myriad of excuses – “it was a virus!”, “we misclicked mom!” – and all of those were fine up until the almost inevitable “Is it so bad we were interested? At least we’re not gay, mom!” What made it worst was the laughter that followed, from both Jace and his parents. 

He had been 16. 

He was now 24, and those jokes still sent the same shiver down his spine. 

“How can you look gay, Jace?” Izzy challenged from where she was sitting, her hands stilling in the blond’s hair, braid unfinished. They were currently all in Alec and Raphael’s apartment, watching a show Alec only pretended to have interest in, and it seemed that one particular individual had caught Jonathon’s eye. 

Jace stuttered, “I-I, I dunno. But he does, okay?” From his position in front of her he obviously did not see Izzy’s eyes, full of impatience and contentment. He also must not have seen him cast her eyes over to Alec before she continued. 

“That’s not a thing! You can’t look gay!”

“Well he does!”

Izzy groaned, tossing her head back against the couch. “Wow Jace, you are so heterosexual”, she laughed. 

Jace’s eyebrows drew together. “Huh? But does that even mean Izzy?”

“You’re blinded by stereotypes, idiot”, his sister said, evidently exasperated. 

Alec, still silent, attempted to ignore Izzy’s constant glances. He wasn’t going to be the one to scold Jace, even if Jace should be more careful with his words. But apparently, Clary was more than willing to. 

“She’s kind of right Jace. That was quite stereotypical”, the blond’s girlfriend chided. Jace looked betrayed and sent her a glare. “Well, it was!” she said. 

Jace shook his head vehemently. “It’s hardly stereotypical to notice a guy’s obvious-”

“-Jace!” Alec finally interrupted. “Just drop it. All of you.”

Simon, who had remained almost as unresponsive as Alec the entire time, nodded along with Alec from his place in his boyfriends arms. Alec once again set out to ignore the gleam in Simon’s eye when he smiled almost proudly at Alec. 

“Yes, let’s end this. Either way Jace, you’re quite wrong; he’s not gay anyway. He’s pansexual and he is quite interested in this adorable brunette called Sani who moved there when she was only 16 so she doesn’t know much English and so he goes and-” 

Simon’s rant was silenced by a look from his boyfriend, Raphael, who slid away from his embrace slowly. 

Smirking at Alec across the room, Raphael rolled his eyes and sighed. “He’s going nerd again. Save me”. Alec couldn’t stop the grin from spreading across his face. 

Alec and Raphael were incredibly similar. Both of them were pretty much out of control of their emotions and seemed to lack the capabilities to ever successfully express them. Perhaps emotionally constipated was the best way to label it. Despite that, both boys were incredibly driven by said emotions and often found themselves the most vulnerable of the group- not that the others knew that. They had bonded over their mutual dislike of all human interaction and Alec’s sexuality. 

Raphael, himself being demisexual and attracted primarily to men, was well-equipped to support Alec through his struggles with his sexuality. And while the girls and Simon were supportive of him, Raphael seemed to silently understand Alec at all times and more often than not, their conversations remained almost exclusively non-verbal.  
That’s not to say that Jace wasn’t supportive. But his support came in the form of crude comments, hyper-masculine jokes and snide remarks. 

“What the hell is panse-”

“We are seriously moving on now before you insult anyone else’s sexuality in the room”, Alec groaned. He shared a look with Raphael, who had attempted to explain his own orientation to Jace on too many occasions before giving up. 

Jace felt attacked and immediately settled down with a disgruntled “whatever” as all eyes turned back to the TV. 

It was barely 2 minutes before Simon spoke up. “Have you guys ever noticed that almost everyone in this room isn’t straight?” 

Isabelle seemed to find the comment comedic and began to laugh, while Alec shifted uncomfortably on his side of the couch, legs sprawled over Clary’s lap. Clary giggled subtly as her hands began to fiddle with Alec’s pants leg again. 

Jace, from his position on the floor slouched against the recliner Izzy found herself in, snorted. 

“No but think about it”, Simon continued. “Izzy’s bisexual, Raph is demi, I’m pan and Alec’s super gay. The only people who aren’t are you and Clary.”

Clary smiled but her eyes appeared strained as she watched Simon excitedly talk.

“We outnumber you”, Izzy snorted and somehow, in all of her grace, even a snort only sounded beautiful.

“Represent!” Simon cheered loudly. 

Alec had had enough. Throwing his legs off of Clary, he scrambled to his feet and headed to the kitchen, side-stepping Jace. He ignored the conversation as it continued, even holding back a laugh when he heard someone ask “how you can be heterosexual?” with obvious disgust.

It wasn’t that Alec wasn’t proud of his sexuality- it was hard to not be in LA of all places. But it was that accepting yourself as different was hard. At 16 he had finally realised why he had always been overly fond of Kyle from his freshmen class, and why his first thought when meeting Raphael at 15 had been whether or not he was gay. At 24, Alec had long since moved passed any crushes on his current best friends but even after 8 years of learning to accept himself, sometimes it was still a struggle. When you realise that the life you have been encouraged to live your entire life is no longer achievable – no kids, no wife – it’s tough. Sometimes the occasional remark was tossed at him, sometimes his father’s old insults about Alec’s “lifestyle” came back to haunt him, whether he wanted them to or not. Sometimes Alec brushed them off and sometimes he just couldn’t. Today, for some reason, was a day in which Alec was obviously very sensitive to any vaguely insulting comments. 

“I wonder what lesbians look like naturally”, a rough voice called from the kitchen doorway. Alec turned to his friend, watching the man lean against the doorframe “Do you think they all have short hair, or do you think they all just have uncharacteristically short nails?”

Alec barked out a laugh. “Jeez Raph. Gross”, he chuckled. 

Raphael smirked before his eyes became serious again. “Seriously though, ignore it. Your brother is an ass and as much as his general presence literally makes me want to murder him, he isn’t intending to upset you with his super heterosexual, totally-not-overcompensating self.”

Alec accepted the sharp pat on the back with a small tug at his lips. “Oh I know. I’m just being stupid, I guess.”

Raphael didn’t look back at him and busied himself with rummaging around the refrigerator. “Well you’re not wrong”, he said monotonously. Alec, having learned to just accept Raphael’s stoic nature, merely nodded.

“Anyway, not that I really care but…” Raphael paused, turning to Alec as he poured himself a Bloody Mary, “how did that date go? Y’know, with that guy.”

“Tod?” Alec shrugged nonchalantly. “It was okay, I guess. Although he wouldn’t stop propositioning me.” He shivered uncomfortably at the memory of awful pick-up lines and crude compliments. 

Raphael frowned. “I don’t need to know about your sex life.”

“Seriously, Raph, he kept talking about how nice my as-”

“-Yeah, I’m sure he loved… that. But I still don’t want to know. Dios”, Raphael sighed. 

Alec chuckled. He finished preparing his and, out of courtesy, Izzy and Clary’s drinks, and took them out to them. Raphael, being the man that he was, did no such courtesy for the boys. 

“Thanks big bro”, Izzy grinned as she accepted the drink. After passing Clary her drink, Alec squeezed into the armchair beside Izzy.

Jace, now in Alec’s old seat, pouted. “Well thanks!”

Izzy smirked at her brother before turned to look across the room at Simon. “So Simon, are you coming next week? Since Raphael is?”

Clary immediately perked up. “Oh yeah! I forgot to mention it yesterday at mom and Luke’s place!”

Simon blinked, confused. “What’s happening next week?”

“We’re going on a road trip of course! Remember I mentioned last week about Cat’s caravan?” Izzy squealed. 

“I thought we agreed one RV would never be enough?” Simon asked. 

“Yeah, I thought we did”, Alec groaned.

Izzy shook her head. “Well Cat has invited a friend or two, one of which owns an RV too!”

Alec scowled. “Who’s going to want to go on a road trip with a bunch of strangers?”

“Who wants to go on a road trip full stop?” Jace grumbled. 

Izzy, ignoring the boys’ complaining, grinned at Simon. “Ignore them”, she said, indicating to her brothers. “Cat isn’t a stranger, she’s my dance partner.”

“But she’s a stranger to us”, Alec insisted. 

Izzy glared at her older brother. “You’ve met her!”

“Yeah, Iz. Once.”

“Still!” The youngest Lightwood sighed. “Listen, I’ve met her friends and they’re cool. We’ll all get on splendidly.” 

Jace began to type furiously on his phone. “So who are they then?” he asked, not glancing up from the screen. 

“Ragnor Fell and Magnus Bane. Magnus works with me and Cat, and Ragnor is a school teacher”, Izzy said cheerfully. 

“Isn’t Catarina older? How old are they?” Clary inquired. 

Raphael perked up. “Magnus is 25, Ragnor is 27.”

Izzy nodded. “And the youngest person here is me at 22 and it doesn’t bother me. Everyone cool?”

“Hang on”, Alec said, waving his hand dismissively. “You know them Raph?”

“As a matter of fact, yes I do”, Raphael nodded. “Me and Magnus grew up in Milton together.”

Alec nodded, understanding. Raphael was a foster child who had managed to escape care when he was 18, having never being successfully adopted. Milton House was where he had spent the majority of his life, from when he was 7 to when he was an adult. 

“Foster care?” Clary raised an eyebrow. 

Raphael grimaced. “Yep. We both never got adopted so we left when I was 18 and Magnus was 19. Lived together for a while before going our separate ways.”

“I’ve known you almost a decade and I’ve never heard of him. Why?” Alec frowned. 

“We don’t talk all that often anymore, okay? We were close growing up but he went his way and I went mine. Plus”, Raphael sighed, “I have mentioned him.”

Alec snorted. “When?”

“Not so much by name.”

Alec frowned in confusion before it dawned on him. “He’s sparkles?” 

Raphael nodded, his eyes full of mirth. “He wore a lot of glitter”, he shrugged. 

“Anyway!” Izzy called. “Forgetting that for 5 minutes, who’s in?”

After a moment or two of silence, Alec and Raphael reluctantly nodded. Jace, noticing his girlfriend’s speedy affirmation, also nodded. 

Simon smiled, “Sure, it’ll be awesome!”

Alec wasn’t so sure.


	2. How The Other Half Lives

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the support this story has received so far. This chapter is very short and is an introduction to the remaining characters of the story but i'm planning the post the next chapter in a day or two and that chapter is a lot longer than this one so stay tuned :)

Chapter 2

“Magnus! Come grab this!” Izzy called from outside his office.

Magnus quickly dropped the sheet music he was holding and made his way out of his small, somewhat claustrophobic workplace. Being the newest addition to the team meant the smallest office, much to his chagrin.

Hissing as he bumped his hip on the corner of his desk, he headed to Isabelle outside in the reception area.

Magnus had met Isabelle around 3 weeks ago when he was offered the job at “Pandemonium”, the dance studio his best friend Catarina co-owned. Izzy had apparently been working there since her 19th birthday and was very much the female incarnation of Magnus himself. Her stunning, unmatched beauty and incredibly sassy attitude made great foundation for a decent friendship, if Magnus ever actually had time to interact with the girl outside of all of his classes and paperwork. Besides sharing a class once every week, the two had not often been given the chance to exchange more than the occasional teasing winks or friendly pleasantries.

“Coming!” he called, sprinting down the short corridor down to the reception area. Smiling softly to Tessa, the receptionist, he headed towards the door where Isabelle stood filing through a large cardboard box.

“The t-shirts arrived”, she explained when she noticed his raised eyebrow.

Magnus grinned. He was currently helping Izzy to plan a performance for a bi-monthly charity event in the town park for the class of 11-14 year-olds they now shared.

“They turned out good. Nice job”, she praised, lifting a small black, off-the-shoulder shirt from the box and twirling it around for good measure. The studio name and emblem was plastered across the back.

“Huh”, Magnus smiled. “They do look good, although what did we expect- I designed them.”

Izzy smirked. “Well at least one thing you’re in control of went okay”, she teased.

Magnus, recognising her playful eyes, laughed. “Look, I said I was sorry about that”, he cried dramatically.

Isabelle nodded with a smile, absentmindedly handing him one of the two large boxes. “Your office”, she said plainly, nodding her head in the direction of the offices.

“Oh come on!” Magnus begged. “I have no room and you know it”.. 

Izzy just grinned. “Nuh-uh. Your office.”

Sensing she wasn’t changing her mind anytime soon, Magnus narrowed his eyes. “You’re a cold one, darling.”

She seemed to take pride in that and let out a small nod. “I know. My brothers remind me regularly.”

“Oh those poor things”, Magnus teased, leading the way to his office. “Having you as a sister? I’m not sure whether to pity them or be jealous.”

“Jealous?” Izzy chortled softly.

Magnus nodded. “Oh yes, having you as a sister? I wish! I’d have grown up with an equally as sassy and fashionable friend. Meanwhile I just had a big lump of brooding called Raph.”

“Oh yeah?” Isabelle smiled softly, refraining from interrogating her co-worker as she remembered what her brother’s friend had told them the night before. “Well, you should pity me then because I too am surrounded by unfashionable, pig-headed boys.”

Depositing the boxes in his office and letting out a breath, Magnus sat on the edge of his desk. He quirked an eyebrow at his co-worker. “Any of them single?” he grinned wolfishly.

Izzy smirked. “One is about 14.” Magnus recoiled in disgust, causing Izzy to laugh.  “One is ridiculously straight and taken.” Again Magnus scrunched his noise up in distaste. “And the other is painfully shy.”

“Shy, huh?” he smirked. Izzy nodded, beaming. “Now, now, Isabelle. Don’t tease darling.”

Turning her back on him, she let out a snicker. Calling behind her back, she said, “You’re meeting him next week.”

Magnus leapt from the desk and followed her eagerly. “Interesting”, he sighed wistfully. “And why is that?”

“He’s one of our road-trip buddies.”

“Oh, I see. Now I’m slightly more excited.”

Izzy turned to him, laughing melodically. “For all you know, he could be really ugly.”

Magnus stared at her dubiously. “If he’s related to you darling he’s got to be a looker”, he flirted. Isabella bit her lip gently to stop herself from teasing him equally in return.

“It’s so frustrating knowing you’re bi”, Izzy sulked, her eyes playful.

Magnus leered. “Why’s that?”

“Because sometimes I really want to have you for myself”, she said, winking.

Magnus beamed, his eyes narrowing as he smiled at her. “I’m down if you are”, he teased.

Isabelle shook her head with a smile. “Watch it Magnus. I’ll take you up on that one day”, she alleged, turning to her own office. “Now, back to work mister. Lesson in an hour.”

Watching her enter her office, Magnus laughed to himself. He could really get used to Izzy Lightwood- she was definitely his type of person.

...

“I’ve already said you’re coming so you have to now”, Catarina insisted, watching her British friend stare at his nails in disinterest.

“I will not be forced into a road-trip with complete strangers. I have no desire to spend my summer break gallivanting across _wherever_ with a group of children.”

Magnus stared at Ragnor in amusement. “Really, Ragner? They’re our age.”

“22 is not my age”, their friend grumbled.

Catarina laughed, setting down the brush she was using to paint her nails. Setting her hands delicately on the edge of the table, she leant towards Ragnor. “Suck it up, grandpa. So Izzy and Jace are 22, the others are not from what I’ve been told. Two of them are 24.”

“Still not my age”, Ragnor maintained, sipping gently on his coffee before turning back to the papers across the table. “What if one of them is one of my students?”

Magnus let out an undignified snort. “You teach 17 year olds!”

He shrugged, “It’s all the same.”

Magnus smirked. “Well I for one am extremely excited. I am rather looking forward to a summer of young men, road –tripping and most likely booze.”

“We’re not college students on spring break, Magnus”, Cat chided.

“It’s my first long break since college, let me have this Cat!” Magnus said.

Ragnor glowered. “It’s probably their first break since college, period.”

“Well you’re going to be a ray of sunshine!” Magnus cheered sarcastically, ignoring Ragnor’s glare and turning to Cat. “Isabelle is a delight and I’m sure whoever she’s bringing will be lovely too. Speaking of, I’ve been promised eye candy.”

Catarina Loss stared at Magnus in confusion. “Jace is very much straight”, she deadpanned.

“Jace?” Magnus asked. “No, not the straight one, the quote on quote shy one.”

Cat thought for a moment and then nodded, eyes soft and friendly. “Oh, Alec! Yeah, he’s sweet but Izzy isn’t kidding when she said he’s shy.”

“You’ve met him?”

“Only once”, she admitted. “But he was a sweetheart; picked his sister up to take her out to dinner.”

“Attractive?” Magnus inquired, signature seductive smirk on his face.

Catarina’s smile melted into a scowl. “Very, but no, Magnus. This is a friendly summer trip. For friends.”

Magnus shrugged. “I’m only playing anyway”, he smiled softly, watching Cat until her smile also returned.

Ragnor seemed unconvinced. “I hope for the child’s sake that he as straight as an arrow.”

Magnus turned to his dearest friend and frowned. “Excuse me! You’re supposed to hope he’s gay, bi, experimenting or going through a rebellious stage so that your friend can get laid!”

Ragnor rolled his eyes but there was a fondness to them when he looked back at Magnus. “You’re not going to get laid, so why hope.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So excited to get your guys' feed back! :) 
> 
> And be excited because malec finally meet in the next chapter!


	3. Let's Get This Trip Started

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the group prepare to head off on their summer road trip and after a week of being told all about the other man, Alec and Magnus finally meet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Malec finally meet in this chapter, hope you enjoy!

Chapter 3

Magnus and Izzy’s charity performance went well, and with that in mind, both returned to _Pandemonium_ with wide smiles that Sunday, arms interlinked.

Through the process of preparing the event, Magnus had grown oddly fond of the young girl and vice versa. Their time spent in rehearsal, lessons and in one of their respective offices planning the finer details of the event, had been filled with playful banter, teasing and genuine conversation. His excitement only continued to grow for their road-trip, when he was sure to grow even more fond of her. Speaking of which.

“When are we meeting tomorrow again?” Magnus asked, bumping his shoulder to Isabelle’s gently.

Izzy unlocked their arms and opened the door to the dance studio. “10:30. Raphael refuses to be up before 9.”

Magnus frowned. Izzy had warned him about Raphael during one of their many dance lesson breaks during the week building up to the event, assuring him that Raphael had no hard feeling and was more than excited to see him again. Still, Magnus felt an uncomfortable shiver down his spine, fearing the worst. Perhaps she was just saying that. Perhaps Raphael did resent him for their distance. At this point, Magnus wasn’t even sure if he still had Raphael’s number programmed in his phone and they had made no contact with one another in almost 2 years. It was sure to be either awkward or dramatic….or both.

Izzy, noticing his blank stare, grazed his arm gently. “Honestly, Magnus. It will be fine. At least you’ll get to reconnect.”

Magnus, feeling uncomfortable with her soft, knowing eyes watching him so closely, plastered a grin on his face, only half meaning it. “Of course! I can’t wait to see how he is”. Of course, the statement was true but the anticipation and nerves were really messing with him.

Isabelle nodded, unconvinced, but dropped the subject. “Are you and the others packed up?”

Magnus smiled, genuinely this time, thinking of Ragnor. “Well Ragnor is still under the impression he has a choice in going, so he hasn’t quite finished. But me and Cat have.”

“Awesome”, Izzy smiled absentmindedly as she swung her purse over her shoulder, checking her phone. “That’s Alec, he’s here to pick me up. I’ll see you tomorrow okay?”

At Magnus’ nod, her smile grew. “Urgh!” she shrieked. “I can’t wait for you to meet everyone!” She headed for the exit, calling “Bye Cat” over her shoulder and exiting before hearing Cat’s cheerful response.

Magnus resisted the urge to look out the window and find out what Alec looked like. He _would_ find out tomorrow, after all.

….

Alec growled as he lugged yet another bag towards the door. “Raph, if you don’t get off your ass and carry your own bags, I will leave without you.”

Raphael’s resounding grumble in response made Alec roll his eyes.

“Have fun not seeing Simon all summer”, he warned, swinging his own bag over his shoulder and grabbing the other.

Very slowly, Raphael raised his head from the arm of the coach, where he had promptly collapsed after Alec dragged him out of bed. “I don’t care”, he growled unconvincingly.

“Sure you don’t!”

“Whatever”, Raphael sighed, sitting up and tying his shoes up. Straightening his suit jacket, which he wore despite Alec telling him it was over the top, he grabbed his bags and followed grumpily behind Alec. “Why are we doing this again?”

Alec shrugged. “Because my sister is both persuasive and insistent and she wants a road trip. So, she gets one.”

Closing the door to their apartment behind him, Alec led himself and Raphael down to the street below, heading straight to the bright yellow van parked poorly on the sidewalk.

Alec swung open the back door of the van, immediately finding a place on the floor beside Jace, dumping his bags at his feet. Raphael threw his bags in alongside Alec’s but remained outside the van.

“Clary, in the back!” he called, leaving little room for argument.

Clary rolled her eyes but sent him an affectionate smile as she jumped into the back, leaving an empty front seat beside Simon which Raphael gladly occupied.

 When the pair greeted each other with a short-lived kiss, Alec bit back a frown. It had been a long time since he had felt such a fondness for someone and it would be a lie to say he didn’t crave it again. While most of his relationships were short lived, a few had reached the point of ‘woah-I-really-like-you’ but they had never progressed further than that. Seeing the pair, despite their somewhat mismatched personalities, made him somewhat envious.

Looking away quickly, Alec busied himself with questioning his sister further on the finer details of their trip.

“So who’s where?”

Izzy looked up from her place on the van floor beside Clary, fiddling with the redhead’s hair. She looked at Alec but continued to carefully play with the girls hair, not that Clary seemed to mine. Sending him a smile, Izzy explained.

“Well I thought it best that me and you share with Cat, Magnus and Ragnor since we know them best”, she said.

Alec startled. “I’ve met Catarina once! Shouldn’t Raphael share with Magnus?”

Raphael turned to look at Alec on his place on the floor from the front seat, giving him a look that clearly said ‘dumbass’. “We decided that to save any awkwardness, Magnus and myself would not share a caravan.”

“What about saving me from awkwardness?” Alec cried vehemently. He wasn’t particularly good with new people, and he had come to spend time with his current friends, not make new ones.

Clary sighed. “I’ll switch with you Alec”, she offered, lowering her head to Izzy’s lap. Alec almost sighed in relief before Izzy shook her head disapprovingly.

“Oh no can do. We need you and Jace to share one room and Raph and Simon share the other. There’s only two rooms per caravan”, she shrugged nonchalantly.

Alec’s face reddened. “2 rooms?! What happens in our caravan then?”

Izzy looked up at Alec’s startled face with fond eyes but a slightly impatient smile. “Me and Cat will share a room, and Magnus and Ragnor will share a room.”

Again, Alec froze. He stared at his sister, waiting for more.

“There’s a pull out sofa bed!” she insisted, although this did nothing to soothe Alec’s impatience.

“Really, Izzy?” he deadpanned, more than only slightly disliking the idea of sharing a caravan with strangers and sleeping on the couch. “Can’t I sleep on the couch in the other caravan?”

Izzy once again shook her head. “Not a pull-out.”

Alec rolled his eyes. “I don’t care, Iz. I’ll be more comfortable there!”

“Fine!” Izzy relented. “You can share the room with Cat and I’ll take the pull-out.”

Jace chuckled. “Y’know, Iz, I don’t think Alec will like that one much better.”

Alec nodded along and glared at Izzy across the van, his glare only momentarily falling when they passed over a large bump and the occupants of the backseat all jolted. Clarly grumbled but settled back in Izzy’s lap with a content smile. Alec watched their interactions warily for a moment, casting a careful eye to Jace to see if he too was noticing a slight tension between the girls. Jace appeared to watch the girls too, although the look in his eyes was almost solemn. Alec decided to leave well-enough alone.

“Nope, you, Catarina and Clary can share and me and Jace will share. Done.”

Jace’s head snapped up towards Alec, as though he were to protest. Eventually, he nodded and pat Alec’s shoulder tightly. “If it’s cool with Clary.”

Clary met her boyfriend’s eyes for a moment and the look that lingered there worried Alec. Again, he saw a sort of sadness and acceptance in the eyes of the couple. He wondered what the problem was- they weren’t sharing a room but they weren’t breaking up.

Either way, Clary nodded gently and sent Alec a soft smile. He couldn’t resist her, and smiled back, nodding gratefully.

From the front seat, Simon beamed. “All settled! Sounds fun! Well, we’re here.”

Jace seemed to scramble for the van door, swinging it open and stumbling out with his bags in his hands. Alec quickly followed, leaving Izzy and Clary to straighten themselves out and climb out after them, brushing their hair gently to smoothen the mess it had become during the bumpy van journey.

Across the parking lot they had stopped in were two decent sized RVs. One was a soft crème colour and slightly smaller than the other. The one furthest from Alec was somewhat larger and its paint was black and almost… sparkly?

“Hey Cat”, he heard his sister call and she walked to greet the approaching figures. Alec vaguely recognised Isabelle’s boss/co-worker and sent her a sheepish smile when she grinned at him. She approached, introducing herself to those around him but Alec busied himself with watching the two figures walking towards them at a slightly slower pace.

One of them looked slightly older, so Alec assumed he was the 27-year-old teacher, although whether that was Magnus or Ragnor, Alec couldn’t remember. He was only slightly shorter than his companion, his hair fair and tidy, his eyes harsh and bored.

The man beside him was entirely different, both in appearance and how he held himself. He appeared to be closer to Alec’s age so must be the dancer Izzy worked with frequently. He was clearly of Asain descent and his skin was a soft tan that Alec knew he himself was powerless to achieve. His eyes, surprisingly bright and amber, were rimmed with what Alec guessed was eyeliner and a spattering of eyeshadow. His lips had curled into a small smile as he approached, wearing a tight fitting teal coloured shirt, several buttons undone and his chest on display, draped in several long necklaces.

Alec attempted not to stare too long at the obvious definition of abs under the man’s shirt and hastily looked away as the man drew nearer, hoping that no one had noticed his blatant checking-out of the newcomer.

Izzy immediately went over the greet the taller of the two, hugging him and whispering something to him, a teasing smile on her lips. The man responded with an eager grin and winked at her kindly. Alec bristled slightly- it was his sister after all.

He heard his name and immediately his cheeks tinted as the man looked up at him, following his sister’s finger as she pointed everyone in their group out. Alec noticed that his eyes darted between everyone, lingering on Alec to sweep his eyes over him before locking on Raphael, who was behind Alec.

Alec blushed despite himself, knowing when he was being checked out, however shortly.

His thoughts were interrupted when he heard something very rare; Raphael laugh. Of course as his best friend, Alec witnessed his friend laugh often however never as whole-heartedly as he did in the moment when the Asian man’s arms wrapped around him tightly. So he must be Magnus, Alec confirmed.

Raphael hugged Magnus tightly and they exchanged cheerful words as they pulled apart.

“It’s been a while, sparkles”, Raphael said, not unkindly.

Magnus beamed. “I know, Santiago. Still dating that vampire of yours?”

Raphael rolled his eyes. “No way, that barely lasted 2 weeks. And she wasn’t a vampire.”

“I beg to differ”, Magnus laughed. “She was pasty as hell. And she was kinda creepy.”

Catarina let out a laugh, moving past Magnus with a fond roll of her eyes. She turned to Raphael and smiled softly, almost hesitantly. “Nice to see you again, Raphael. It’s been a while.”

Raphael turned to her. “Hello Catarina.” He allowed himself to be brought into a short hug from Cat before nodding in greeting to Ragnor who simply did the same in return.

Isabelle grinned at the scene and dragged Simon forward with a giggle. “If you want to know Magnus, this is Simon. The boyfriend.”

Magnus looked up at the brunet in front of him as a small smile slowly spread across his face. He turned to Raphael, who was glowering at Isabelle. “I’ll hand it to you Raph, not bad.” He ignored Raphael’s glare and went to greet Simon. “So, Sheldon, how do you put up with him?”

Simon laughed somewhat nervously and shrugged. “He’s not so bad.”

Magnus smirked. “Oh, I know.”

“So do the rest of us get introduced?”

Everyone’s eye simultaneously turned to Jace, who stood behind everyone else, watching the scene with far less patience than the rest of them. Izzy resisted rolling her eyes but instead took a breath and dragged Magnus towards the blond.

As they passed, Alec couldn’t contain the shudder that passed through him when Magnus brushed against him slightly as Izzy dragged him along. He heard Magnus’ light chuckle when Jace backed away slightly and frowned.

“Magnus”, he greeted, holding out his hand. Jace nodded, shaking it firmly as his face softened a little. “Jace”, he replied.

Magnus then turned to Clary and grinned, eyes fixed on her hair. “Well, you’re gorgeous!” he grinned.

Clary attempted to contain a blush but she smiled kindly. “Nice to meet you Magnus.”

“This is Clary”, Izzy confirmed and Magnus nodded.

“Oh, I’ve heard quite a bit about you”, he smiled. Clary’s blush deepened.

Izzy finally steered Magnus’ arm in Alec’s direction. For a moment Alec wondered whether Magnus found it annoying however his thought was cut short when those amber eyes were directly in his line of sight, scrunched up adorably in a smile.

“And _who are you_?” he said approvingly, his eyes sweeping over Alec’s body, lingering far longer than before. His eyes, as bright as they were, darkened slightly as he grinned at the younger boy.

Alec tried his best to remain calm- the last thing he wanted was to embarrass himself by stuttering like a teenager.

Instead, in faux confidence, Alec smiled and allowed himself to glance over Magnus appreciatively. Inside his mind, he screamed at himself for doing such a thing in front of his siblings, or Raphael, who would in a moment’s notice laugh at him. But he found he just didn’t care.

“Alec”, he said quietly, almost a breathless whisper. Shaking himself out of it, he repeated louder. “Alec. Izzy’s brother.”

Magnus’ mouth formed a small ‘O’ as he nodded. “The shy one or the 14-year-old?” he smirked.

Alec blushed. “I assume Izzy meant the shy one”, he laughed nervously, his confidence slipping.

Magnus seemed to find it endearing as his smile only widened. “Nice to meet you Alec. Now, _you_ I’ll remember.” With a wink and flourish, he spun on his heel to join his friend and began to introduce Ragnor to the rest of them. Ragnor barely spared a smile although Alec hardly paid attention, eyes rooted on the elusive, attractive Magnus Bane.

Eventually after pleasantries were exchanged everyone split off into their respective RVs, Alec and the boys taking Catarina’s cream one. Alec and Jace immediately dumped their bags on the double bed of their shared room, awkwardly stumbling around each other in the small space before settling on going in one at a time. Alec was dreading sharing the bed considering how small it looked and how not small they were.

Everyone collected outside as Magnus and Catarina exchanged routes. As the only people capable of driving RVs, the two agreed on a route and set off, Magnus originally heading back to his own sparkling RV. As he passed, Magnus’ eyes flickered to Alec and he froze.

Panicking, Alec wondered whether he had done something wrong but before he could ask, Magnus and Catarina were talking again. Catarina appeared to roll her eyes before pointing a stern finger at her friend, to which Magnus seemed to laugh. Kissing her cheek gently, Magnus waved her a goodbye, entering the crème RV without a backwards glance to Alec.

In confusion, Alec looked to Izzy who was standing talking quietly to Clary. Cat approached and obviously said something interesting for Izzy threw her head back and laughed, glancing over to Alec before letting out another peal of laughter. Even more confused, Alec decided he no longer had the patience and he headed back into the RV.

As he entered, he spotted Magnus at the wheel flicking through a small map and crossing off small points with a red pen. Curiosity getting the better of him, Alec approached.

“Are we visiting all of those?” he asked, staring in shock at the many **X** s on the map.

Magnus didn’t appear to startle, as though he had known Alec was there. He shook his head. “Not really. Most we just pass through but for now we’re going here”, he pointed to the closest dot to their current location, which still seemed quite far away, “and then tomorrow we continue for as long as we can.”

“Won’t you get tired, being the only one driving?”

Magnus looked up at Alec and smiled softy. “That’s why we’re taking overnight breaks rather than just driving throughout.”

Alec nodded, thoughtfully. He noticed that Magus’ eyes seemed locked on his and he coughed nervously.

“I think we’re ready to head off”, he said, nodding to the other RV which had slowly begun to move.

Magnus nodded, spinning in his seat to start the engine. He looked behind him briefly before nodding to the seat beside him. “You can sit, y’know.”

Alec felt his cheeks burn and he stumbled slightly as the RV began to move. Shaking his head to clear it, Alec stuttered out an excuse about seeing Jace before heading hastily into his room.

_Where had all his earlier confidence gone?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Really hope you liked it. Again, thanks for the support and the comments- I love reading your feedback!
> 
> Don't forget to comment what you thought ;)


	4. Flirtation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec and Magnus slowly become acquainted through flirtation, teasing and... speedos?

Chapter 4

They drove for around 3 hours, Alec focusing his time on watching the landscape go by through his small bedroom window, despite Jace’s mocking. After having escaped from a potentially awkward conversation with Magnus, Alec had only briefly tolerated Jace before sending the blond out to entertain himself somewhere in the caravan that wasn’t their room. His mind, though often busy, was very much occupied with thoughts of Magnus.

Considering they had only just met, be it a few hours prior, Alec was not in a position to crush on someone that so far, had expressed no crush-able qualities save his attractiveness. And Alec didn’t. But his mind had drifted occasionally to the man outside driving.

 _There is nothing wrong with finding someone attractive and sparing them a passing thought,_ he reminded himself.

At around 3 o’clock, they all collectively decided to pull over and find somewhere to eat. Cat, having driven in front, had gotten Izzy to call Alec and let them know to pull over into the oncoming parking lot.  Alec had hurriedly told Magnus, his own stomach empty.

“Oh sure. Ask her if it’s ‘ _The Blue Lagoon’_ ” Magnus instructed absentmindedly as he continued to drive.

“You know the place?”

Magnus shrugged. “I’ve been to this area before but I can’t remember if it’s ‘ _The Blue Lagoon’_ she’s talking about.”

After a moment, Alec shook his head, phone pressed to his ear. “Izzy said they’ve chosen a restaurant, not a café.”

“Huh”, Magnus paused, eyes drifting to Alec briefly. At his raised eyebrow, Alec shrugged helplessly.

“She says it’s just up ahead.”

When they arrived at the small local restaurant, Jace raced to the caravan door and threw himself from the small space, Alec following far more slowly.

“Jace get off the ground!” Izzy called from across the parking lot, laughing as she watched her brother lay on the ground, arms spread like a starfish.

“No! ‘S too hot”, Jace panted and stuck his tongue out like that of a dog.

Raphael, apparently unable to resist, quickly stuck his boot out just as Jace did so. Immediately upon contact, Jace yelped and his eyes sprung open. Staring only briefly at Raphael, Jace rolled away with a deep squeal.

“Dude!”  he yelled, brushing dirt from his tongue.

Raphael simply rolled his eyes. “You could have just asked someone to open a window”, he said.

Jace rose to his feet, brushing himself off. “Yeah, well, I-I um… didn’t think of that actually.”

This time, Alec refrained from letting out an inhuman groan at his brother’s stupidity and simply headed towards Izzy and Cat who were talking quietly.

“What is this place?”

Izzy looked up from her phone where she was clearly showing Catarina something. Shrugging, she said, “Some 4-star restaurant. Why not treat ourselves the first night, huh?”

“Well we have to preserve the money for the rest of the trip”, a voice interjected from behind them. Magnus approached, smiling lightly. “Not that I wouldn’t love to wine and dine you, darling.”

Alec looked between Magnus and his sister in confusion. Isabelle grinned at Magnus and winked joyfully.

“Anytime”, she teased causing Magnus’ grin to widen.

Alec shifted uncomfortably, taking a small shuffle back so as to remove himself from their line of sight. Magnus spared him a glance.

“C’mon then gorgeous, time to eat”, he said.

Alec attempted not to cringe- someone flirting with his sister right in front of him was not exactly something he liked. When Izzy appeared to remain still, Alec looked up in surprise.

Cat, Izzy and – more importantly – Magnus, were all watching him expectantly. Magnus had a knowing smile on his face, eyebrow arched flirtatiously. Alec furrowed his eyebrows in confusion for a moment before he realised his mistake.

Magnus had been talking to _him._

“Oh come on now, don’t harass the boy”, a deep British voice interrupted as Ragnor approached. He looked at his friend disapprovingly.

Alec blushed, nervously shaking his head before turning to the restaurant, entering hastily without looking back. He could hear Magnus’ cheerful laugh as he walked away, his cheeks darker than Izzy’s lips. 

When they had gotten a table, a very large one at that, they all took their seats. Izzy snatched Alec and Magnus’ hands, depositing them beside her with a smile and the excuse that she “wanted her favourite people close by”. Alec sunk into his seat beside Magnus who sat next to Isabelle, a small smile playing at his lips. Was he ever _not_ happy? When Raphael sat himself next to Alec, dragging his boyfriend with him, he raised an eyebrow at his friend. Alec shrugged and attempted to contain his blush.

Within the hour they had all eaten their starters and mains, sitting comfortably around the circular table as they spoke idly while waiting for dessert.  

“I am _not_ going there!” Jace complained across the table.

Clary frowned. “Hey! Why not?”

“It’s a museum”, Jace deadpanned, as though that was enough of a reason.

Alec contained a snort. His brother had never been keen on history or art or anything education for that matter. Just as Alec was about to add his two cents, Magnus spoke up.

“Museums are amazing. You clearly underappreciate the beauty of history, art and anything with substance.”

Alec turned to Magnus in shock as several of the group began to laugh. Even Ragnor spared a chuckle. Alec watched Magnus nod triumphantly, obviously proud of himself. Alec attempted not to join in with the laughing as he knew that if he did, Jace would only hate him.

And he didn’t want to get kicked in his sleep tonight.

“Fine”, Jace huffed impatiently. “We’ll go to the stupid museum.”

Catarina piped up from down the table. “Anyway, I don’t know about you guys but I want to actually know the people I’m travelling with. So, Clary, you and Jace are together right?”

Clary’s smile dropped slightly, although Alec himself wouldn’t have noticed it were he not interested in her answer as well; something was weird between the red head and his brother lately.

“Oh yeah, we are.” Clary appeared unenthusiastic to even the untrained eye and Jace appeared tense in his seat beside her.

Catarina must have noticed something too as she quickly turned to Simon, who sat beside Clary with a nervous smile. “And you?”

Simon stuttered anxiously as a blush rose to his cheeks. “Taken”, he eventually said, nodding to Raphael who looked incredibly bored.

“Which you already knew”, Raphael sighed impatiently.

Cat rolled her eyes and Alec had the thought that lots of people were doing that lately.

“And you Alec? Anyone special?”

Alec looked at Catarina as the woman smiled encouragingly. From beside her Izzy grinned and Jace leaned forward intrigued.

“Oh, um, i-um… no.”

“Alec’s a bit of a prude”, Jace grunted.

Alec bristled. “I am not! Shut up, Jace!”

“You kinda are, Alec”, Simon smirked. Alec spun to face him, glare firmly in place. Simon shrugged. “Jus’ saying.”

Isabelle laughed melodically. “Oh Alec”, she sighed. “Don’t worry big bro, maybe you’ll meet a hottie at the beach during our travels.” Her peals of laughter continued.

Alec shifted uncomfortably as he watched Catarina’s eyes light up as she too began to giggle.

“ _Maybe_ ”, Magnus teased from beside him.

Alec shivered and quickly leant away from the man as he blushed deeply. Magnus winked but said nothing more as he turned to Izzy and began a new conversation. Alec noticed that every now and then Magnus glanced back at him, eyes always alight with a smile.

…

It was close to 11 and the group had been driving since their early dinner/late lunch. Only stopping for a restroom break every now and then, they had travelled reasonably far in the short amount of time. They had easily surpassed the first X Magnus had planned for them to stop at.

Alec had lingered around the caravan bedroom and small dining room for most of the time either reading or talking to Jace. After he had exhausted both resources however, he had joined Magnus up at the front.

They had spoken for around an hour, discussing their lives back home. Alec told Magnus about his younger brother Max, and the pair shared laughs about Jace and Izzy. Magnus openly told stories of a young Raphael back at ‘Milton’ and shared many tales about his mischievous cat.

“So, what do you do then?”

Alec felt surprisingly carefree and confident as he leant back in the seat and put his feet up on the dashboard, careful not to obstruct Magnus’ view as he drove.

“Work-wise?” Alec asked. At Magnus’ nod, he chuckled lightly. “Me and Raphael actually work at this bar down the street from our place. Oh, and on the weekends I teach at a nearby gym.”

Magnus’ interest was piqued. “Oh my! And what exactly do you… teach?”

Alec resisted the urge to blush or roll his eyes. “Any form of martial arts really- sort of a mixture, I guess.”

Magnus grinned and turned to Alec with wild eyes. “So, you’re probably pretty flexible then?”

“Oh my god!” Alec snorted, ducking his head in embarrassment. Magnus laughed with him, a wide smile on his face and amusement in his eyes. “You are one hell of a flirt”, Alec almost mumbled, nervous.

“That I am dear”, the older man leered. “You love it though, don’t deny.”

Alec rolled his eyes kindly before turning back to Magnus. “So… is there something I should know about between you and Izzy? Like, do I have to give you the ‘if-you-hurt-her-I’ll-kill-you’ talk?”

Magnus looked stunned but his smile was ever-present. “While your sister is incredibly sexy and truly adorable”, Alec cringed slightly, “she is very much absorbed in someone else. That and Cat forbids work relationships.”

Alec nodded thoughtfully and attempted to ignore the sinking feeling in his stomach when Magnus said his baby sister was otherwise absorbed- he worried about who she may be absorbed by.

“So, no girlfriend at home then? Outside of work?” Alec asked, his blood racing.

Magnus shook his head, eyes on the road. He spared Alec a smile. “No girlfriend _or_ boyfriend.”

Alec looked away to hide his blush. W _hy was he even blushing? What because Magnus had confirmed he was also into guys? Pathetic, Alec!_

“You?”

Alec jumped at the sound of Magnus’ voice. “You already know the answer to that.”

“Oh yes”, Magnus said cheerfully. The smile on his face clearly showed he knew Alec’s answer and had not forgotten it from dinner- so he was teasing him? “Well if we end up going to the beach tomorrow maybe you’ll find that hottie of yours.”

Alec laughed. “All I’ll find is an old man in a speedo.”

“Oh gosh! Why put that image in my head?” Magnus cried.

“To prepare you! There’s always an old man with leather skin in a speedo at the beach. Especially in LA”, Alec chortled. Magnus was beaming in his seat, head thrown back as far as he could allow to let out a loud laugh.

“Don’t forget about the kids that’ll be there… running around, destroying our sandcastle!”

“ _We’re_ making a _sandcastle_ now?” Alec couldn’t contain a snort and something akin to a giggle.

Magnus turned to him in faux-shock. “Of course we are, Alexander! Then we’ll hunt down your hottie, of course.”

“Maybe we’ll find you a hottie too”, Alec teased. “You into the older man thing?”

“Gross Alec!”

Their laughter increased in volume as Magnus swatted at Alec’s arm playfully. Alec’s cheeks ached from constant grinning but he found he didn’t care; it was the first time in a long time that Alec had found such enjoyment in a near stranger. Magnus broke at the oncoming red light and leaned forward against the wheel, banging his head against it as he laughed. Alec watched him with a gleeful expression.

Their laughter was slowly dying down when the noise started.

“Oh god, is that what I think it is?” Alec gasped as he turned in his chair to glare at Raphael and Simon’s bedroom door.

Magnus’ laughter started up again. “Go Raphael!” he shouted jokingly.

Alec looked scandalised but he had a small smile on his face. “Magnus!” He slapped Magnus’ arm. “Don’t encourage that!”

“Oh what’s the harm”, he smirked in response. “Unless of course you’re jealous since you can’t do the same.”

Alec looked away as his cheeks tinted. “N-no. That’s just- no.”

Magnus glanced his way, their eyes locking when Alec turned back. “Well, you _could_ do the same if you desperately wanted to. I mean, I am here and I would be more than willing to fuc-”

Alec let out a quiet squeal, spinning to face the wall with his back to Magnus.

Magnus laughed. “Y’know you’re almost hotter from the back.”

Alec hung his head in embarrassment as he attempted to ignore the innuendos and brush away any inappropriate thoughts. He wasn’t sure whether he was embarrassed at the sheer proposition or the fact that his subconscious mind seemed to like the idea.

Magnus hesitated. “I’m only teasing Alec. I don’t mean anything by it”, he said, attempting to reassure him. The last thing he wanted was to scare or upset the younger boy.

Alec shook his head. “No, it’s fine. I’m just… not used to people being quite so… forward, I guess.”

“Is it a bad thing?” Magnus asked and Alec could clearly hear the hesitation and worry laced into his words.

Turning back to the older man, Alec nervously met his eyes. “It’s… different.”

Magnus nodded thoughtfully. Almost instantly though, his smile reappeared and it was as though the entire conversation had never happened. “So, how big will our sandcastle be? We need to brainstorm ideas.”

Alec paused, only mildly disappointed at Magnus’ attempt at distraction. He found himself grateful for Magnus’ gentleness and complete respect for Alec’s feelings. “Oh, um, sure."

Magnus sent Alec a gentle smile and the boy responded in kind, ignoring the urge to lick his lips at the subtle spark of desire in Magnus’ amber eyes.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Seriously thank you all so far for the incredible support!
> 
> I have a question though; next chapter I want to add in a day out for the group (why it wasn't in there anyway idk!)  
> So would you guys prefer a beach trip to continue their banter, or that museum trip Clary mentioned to kickstart deeper conversations? 
> 
> Up to you guys but comment and let me know which you would prefer!


	5. Kisses

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the group head to a nearby art museum, more tension grows between Alec and Magnus and a kiss between two people threatens to ruin relationships.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I eventually decided to go with the idea of a museum trip. While most people wanted the beach trip, I've decided that it will fit more ideally into the story in a couple of chapters time. For now though, lots of you wanted some more on the Clary, Izzy and Jace dilemma and there's definitely lots in this chapter. 
> 
> Also, per someone's request, I have added in some more Magnus POV and will continue to attempt to spread the POVs a little more equally across Malec from now on. 
> 
> This is also the LONGEST chapter so far... over 5,000 words guys!
> 
> Enjoy x

Chapter 5

 

It was decided that after their first day, the group would head out for a day away from the RVs. After far more deliberation than necessary, everyone but Jace and Raphael wanted to check out the closest art museum. Clary had been shaking with excitement in the hours leading up to their arrival at the art museum and her excitement had translated beautifully into a sketch of Jace and Izzy sitting together on the couch of Magnus’ RV (the one that for some reason, Cat was driving.)

Looking down at her sketch, stray grains of graphite gathering like dust in the paper’s crevices, Clary frowned.

It was undeniable that all of the Lightwood’s were stunningly good looking; Alec had a brooding, mysterious but also comforting aura about him, and his unfathomable good looks reflected that perfectly. Jace was an entirely different breed of beautiful, with sharp lines and edges and honey coloured hair. He was more than just attractive. His entire body reflected an inner confidence and yet also a well-hidden playful personality. His eyes were attention-grabbing and his smile was mind blowing.

But Isabelle… well, she was a whole different story. There was something in Isabelle that wasn’t present in her older biological brother, Alec. Perhaps it was a more open and confident personality but whatever it was directly showed in her looks. Her dark hair contrasted with her lighter skin and her body looked as though it was sculpted and perfected by the hands Michelangelo himself. Clary would be extremely jealous were she not captivated and in awe of the woman in front of her.

But that was the problem.

She wasn’t supposed to be in awe of anyone but Jace.

Especially not his little sister.

Since talking to Jace a couple of day prior to their trip, Clary couldn’t deny that she had let her attention slip to the youngest Lightwood one too many times. She had grown drawn to Isabelle, in a way she wasn’t allowed to be. To think that just a few months ago Clary only saw her as a potential future sister-in-law was disorientating and boggled her mind with questions. She wasn’t sure when it can come about, but it had. And it was worrying.

Looking between the pair on the page, seeing their happiness and fondness for one another projected into every stroke of the pencil, Clary could recognise that which she was so desperately unwilling too.

She had feelings for both of them.

 

…

 

“So how come Jace is never here?”

Alec snorted. “He’s probably with Clary or something. Seems to enjoy her company more than ours.”

Magnus looked disgusted at the notion. “Well, I happen to think that our company is quite… desirable.”

Despite having spent several hours around him and having heard almost all the flirty compliments and innuendos possible, Alec still managed to blush. Magnus merely grinned with pride.

“So, are you a fan of art then?” Alec asked quietly as they continued to drive behind their friend’s RV.

Magnus’ eyes seemed to light up and his smile widened slightly. “Love it. Especially older art since I also happen to love history. Do you?”

“Eh.”

“Eh?”

Alec shifted uncomfortably. “I do like art, I guess I just don’t really understand it. I mean, we have some cool paintings at the bar but there’s really not all that much art for me to like.”

Magnus nodded thoughtfully, which he seemed to do a lot. His eyes, while still being firmly on the road, seemed to look far away. Alec worried for a moment before the older man appeared to perk up slightly. “I guess I’ll just have to educate you on the wonders of modern and not-so-modern art.”

Alec took a moment to simply look at the man beside him. In the many hours they had conversed, it hadn’t truly hit Alec that he was talking to the same man that he blushed and gushed over when they met under 24 hours ago. Through all of their laughing, flirting and story-telling, Alec had managed to completely forget who he was even speaking too. Sure, he knew that Magnus was the one bringing tears to his eyes with every hilarious story but in his mind, Alec seemed to have disassociated Magnus’ face with Magnus. It wasn’t necessarily a bad thing since it made Alec less aware of the man’s startling beauty but it definitely had been overlooked.

Looking at him now, Alec could see everything. He could see Magnus’ eyes, alight with amusement and happiness, something potent in all of his stories and funny puns. He could see Magnus gently bite down on his lower lip and knew it reflected the fear of rejection that Magnus felt whenever he overthought Alec’s reaction to a proposition or innuendo.  His hair, immaculate and tidy, showed the more reserved and contained aspects of Magnus’ personality, something that Alec had not seen too much of. His decorative style and delicate jewellery represented the complex side of Magnus that Alec had a feeling so desperately needed to be cherished.

And Alec was blown away once more.

Similar to his first glance at the man, it was undeniable that he was gorgeous. But with each passing moment and each genuine smile, Alec felt himself grow even more attracted to the man beside him.

Crushes were stupid.

“That could be fun”, Alec nodded. Magnus sent him a wink and a smile that was, surprisingly, closer to friendly rather than flirty. It was almost comforting to see something similar to fondness and caring in Magnus’ eyes, rather than simple desire or interest.

“It will be darling, don’t you worry. I happen to be the perfect art museum buddy.”

“No you are not”, a deep, rumbling voice protested.

Alec turned to watch in amusement as Raphael stumbled from his and Simon’s room, his hands clawing at his tired eyes.

“Lookin’ good, Raph”, Alec teased. Raphael was not a morning person and regularly fell prey to Alec’s cheerful morning energy.

“Shut the fuck up”, he grumbled in response.

Alec chuckled and Magnus grinned.

“Still not a morning person, Raphael?” Magnus asked sarcastically.

“Not when it’s this early!”

Magnus cackled. “Oh honey, it’s 11 o’clock and I came over at like 8”, Magnus said with a condescendingly sweet voice. Raphael simply glared at him and returned to his room with coffee in hand.

“Why would you want to have sex on such a small bed?”

Magnus spun to face Alec in shock as the boy in question slapped a hand over his mouth in surprise. He had only been wondering about Raphael and Simon’s obvious dislike for leaving their beds, but he had not meant to say it out loud.

The tension was broken when Magnus laughed abruptly. “You are so _special_ Alec Lightwood!”

…

 

When they finally reached the museum, Magnus had eagerly looped his arm through Ragnor and Catarina’s and had towed them towards the entrance. He had promised Alec that he would be his art museum partner but had decided that he would at least spend the first few moments with his friends, who he had seen little of in the past 24 hours…

Well, except for sharing a bed (much to his dislike) with Ragnor, and dinner last night, and breakfast this morning.

And yet still Magnus felt that there was something he had missed in the moments he wasn’t by his friends’ sides.

Magnus didn’t have many friends. Sure, he was incredibly popular with his older dancers at _Pandemonium_ and he was a well-known face in the club scene across LA but he was also an incredibly distant person. Thus, despite all of the bonding and talking, Magnus knew that his friends could offer him a type of comfort that Alec yet could not.

Magnus wasn’t entirely sure about Alec. And by that, he meant whether or not it was worth pursuing, in the sense that he wasn’t sure whether that was something Alec wanted. Alec had flirted back and at times had flirted to such a degree that he almost matched Magnus in enthusiasm, but there was also something closed off about the younger man. His silence and shy behaviour was endearing but Magnus didn’t doubt that something in Alec lacked confidence and despite the man’s ever-growing appeal, it was difficult for Magnus to keep digging further into Alec’s personality. He loved doing so, learning more about him, but that was the point- he was becoming obsessed and he knew that Alec was not one to appreciate such attention.

That, and he had, of course, come on the trip to spend time with everyone there, not just Alexander. Primarily, Cat, Ragnor and Raphael.

“What’s gotten you in such a mood?” Ragnor complained as Magnus dragged the pair into the museum with him.

Magnus looked at his friend in faux-hurt. “What? I can’t spend time with my friends?”

“Oh you can”, Cat chuckled from beside him, “but you’re not normally this enthusiastic.”

Magnus shook his head dismissively.

“Is this something to do with Alec?”

Magnus turned to Cat in surprise before looking around to double check none of the rest of the group were too close. It appeared that Raphael and Alec had gone off on their own, with the remaining 4 lingering around awkwardly while Clary led them with an eager smile. Magnus noticed that the only cheerful one appeared to be Isabelle, who was watching the redhead with kind eyes. Jace and Simon looked both baffled and confused at what Clary appeared to be saying.

Turning back to Cat, he shook his head. “Honestly it’s not. Sure, I kinda like him, but I genuinely did want to walk with you guys for a bit. Then I’ll go and join McDreamy again.”

“McDreamy?” Ragnor deadpanned, eyebrow raised. “Seriously?”

 

 

…

 

 

“Y’know, if you really don’t want to listen to what I have to say then go sit in the café or the gift shop for a while”, Clary eventually complained, her eyes narrowed on Simon and Jace, who had taken it upon themselves to take turns acting out the classic paintings they saw around them. Isabelle, despite appreciating the comedy of it, was also growing impatient.

“Yeah, please do. I happen to want to listen”, she said sassily as she looped an arm through Clary’s.

Jace’s eyes narrowed only slightly as he nodded. His lips twitched minutely as though he wanted to say more but he eventually settled on a friendly goodbye before dragging Simon away with him, the brunet complaining the entire way.

As their voices faded into the distance, Clary found herself growing more and more aware of Izzy’s arm linked through hers. Considering their closeness, they had interacted physically on many occasions and had never been strangers to physical contact, but now Clary felt like her arm was on fire. Her nerve endings sparked with stimulation as she felt Izzy’s skin graze across hers as the Lightwood sister steered them towards a large piece on the far right wall. Her skin, soft and smooth, was incredibly distracting and Clary found herself daydreaming.

“Clary? Hello?”

“Huh? What?”

Isabelle laughed gently, tugging at their linked arms and nodding her head towards the picture. “Opinion?”

Clary blinked, her clouded mind clearly far more slowly than she would like. She gazed up at the picture.

It appeared to show a woman, elegant in her design, draped across what appeared to be an old mahogany table, her arms cast around her head and her fingers pulling softly at strands of dark hair. Her skin was an almost porcelain white, save for the red tint of her cheeks, plump and full with a soft smile. Her eyes were closed, allowing her eyelashes to fan out against her cheeks and for some reason Clary decided that her eyes were dark underneath. The woman had soft features and her body seemed to be that of a small figured woman. Her presence in the picture was far from small however, and her personality and confidence commanded all of Clary’s attention.

Casting her eyes back to Izzy, who was gazing up at the painting with interest, Clary noticed similar things in the girl beside her. An air of confidence, dark hair and eyes but soft and open features. A beautiful painting.

“It’s very, er… beautiful”, she settled on, her eyes only half on the painting in front of her.

Izzy’s laugh was soft and quiet but full of life. “What a fabulous description”, she teased. She finally turned back to Clary, noticing the redhead’s eyes firmly on her.

Their eyes met and for a moment Clary felt panic sour through her when she saw Izzy shift slightly. Isabelle looked as enraptured as Clary felt but her posture had tensed almost as though she was holding something back. In a dark corner of Clary’s mind she spared a thought on what it might feel like to kiss the girl in front of her, all thick lips and dark eyes, but she cast the thought aside almost instantaneously.

Izzy watched Clary closely and despite the fact that she remained completely still, Isabelle knew she was thinking far too much. She could tell from the slight biting of her lip that Clary’s thoughts were distracting and that she was having trouble, it seemed, to keep them inside her own mind. Izzy was not opposed to hearing of said thoughts, but from the half frightened, half startled look in Clary’s eyes she suspected that Clary wasn’t willing to share them.

“Clary?” she asked gently, her voice barely even loud enough for herself to hear. She berated herself momentarily.

Clary’s eyes fluttered gently as she blinked and her eyes seemed to widen slightly when she realised that she had zoned out. Izzy attempted to send her a reassuring smile to calm her when she felt the distracting pressure of Clary digging her nails into the skin of Izzy’s upper arm where the Lightwood had leant against her slightly, their arms still looped. Izzy didn’t dare look away from the girl in front of her, knowing that such a move would rip Clary from whatever world she was lost in.

She tried again, letting her finger stroke against Clary’s bare arm gently as she spoke. “Clary? You okay?”

Clary’s eyes focused slightly and the redhead nodded. Isabelle noticed she licked her lips in what was no doubt a nervous habit. After years of knowing each other, Isabelle knew that the way Clary blinked rapidly was her way of gaining some semblance of control.

“Izzy?”

Izzy looked back up at Clary from where her eyes had wandered to the girl’s lips, far plumper than she remembered and slightly darker from the biting. She met Clary’s eyes and was met with a look of hesitation and something akin to want.

“Yeah?”

Izzy felt an undeniable need surge through her when Clary licked her lips once more. She watched as Clary’s eyes darted around nervously before settling back on her.

Although Isabelle Lightwood was no stranger to attraction, she was surrounded by supermodel-looking dancers on a daily basis, she recognised in Clary a more muted and innocent sense of beauty. The girl was beauty in its entirety but she had a more subtle and sophisticated look about her compared to Izzy herself. The look in her eyes was one that Izzy recognised as want, perhaps even desire, and her blood began to race through her veins. She too found herself licking her lips, eyes darting between lips and eyes as she fought for which to settle on.

Clary watched Izzy look between her features and felt a rush of glee through her veins when in dawned on her that Isabelle was showing signs of attraction.

Did Izzy want _her?_

She had seen the look in Izzy’s eyes before; it was a look sometimes exchanged between Simon and Raphael, and more recently between Alec and Magnus. It was pure, unadulterated desire in it most basic and primal form, laced with something that could only be described as reservation. Izzy was holding herself back.

But Clary didn’t want her to.

Clary felt herself leaning forward before her mind could comprehend its decision and her arm slipped from Isabelle’s to wrap hesitantly around her waist. Her hand barely grazed Izzy’s body but Clary could see the almost gasp Izzy took when Clary allowed her fingers to dance lightly across the hem of her skirt. Clary’s heart raced in her confidence and Izzy watched as the girl in front of her allowed her eyes to fall to her lips.

Izzy froze for just a split second before she allowed her now lifeless arms to move, darting gently towards Clary’s neck and resting ever-so-lightly on her bare, exposed skin. Clary felt her hair prickle and her skin tingle at the contact but attempted to spare it not a moment more of her thought as she continued to close the distance between their mouths.

She heard Izzy let out a deep sigh as the Lightwood in question let her eyes close, her fingers tightening around the back of Clary’s neck slightly when their lips met.

Unlike anything she had ever felt before, Izzy’s lips were softer and plumper than a man’s. The pressure Isabelle applied was almost non-existent but Clary still felt the hairs on the back of her neck stand on end as a bolt of what she could only assume was shock raced through her veins. She had never felt like this from simply grazing her lips against another person’s, not even Jac-

Izzy let out a gasp as Clary tore herself from her grip, their lips, only having just been acquainted, springing apart with equally loud gasps. Izzy knew the look in Clary’s eyes before the redhead even had a spare moment to open her mouth. Before any words could settle between them, Izzy raised her hand, palm towards Clary and shook her head just slightly.

Clary felt the words die on her tongue as she watched Izzy lower her head slightly in what she knew to be shame. It must have dawned on Isabelle that she had just kissed her brother’s girlfriend.

The sound of Izzy’s heals retreating tore Clary from her thoughts and she watched in both relief and despair as Isabelle Lightwood left the room.

 

…

 

Alec could feel Magnus’ eyes on him, their weight distracting him from his attempt at understanding the piece in front of him. He attempted to ignore the feeling of being watched for as long as possible before he finally releanted and turned to Magnus abruptly.

The man in question barely fluttered his eyelids at Alec’s quick movement and leant further against the wall, allowing his head to rest against it. He shamelessly cast his eyes across the man in front of him, the tight denim shirt he wore hugging his arms in a way that only further emphasises the shape of them. The pang Magnus felt in his stomach was not surprising.

“What am I supposed to be seeing?” Alec grumbled, clearly tired of Magnus’ game.

After joining him only 20 minutes ago, Magnus had decided the best way to educate Alec was to allow him to teach himself. He had pointed to a painting and left Alec to decipher its meaning. Unfortunately for Alec, it was a more modern piece composed entirely on circles and squares.

It made no sense.

“Whatever you want to see, darling. That’s what art is”, Magnus said finally, pushing himself off of the wall and wondering behind Alec. He gently grasped Alec’s head in his hands, ignoring Alec’s grunt of displeasure, and forced the younger man to look back up at the canvas in front of him. “What do you see?”

For a moment, Alec remained sileant and Magnus almost thought he may receive an answer. But eventually Alec simply shook his head from Magnus’ grasp and groaned. “I don’t see anything. It’s squares and circles- that’s not art.”

Magnus rolled his eyes. “It is art, but I think we both agree you’ll never learnt to appreciate it. No matter how many times I manhandle your dainty little head.”

Alec touched his head, eyes narrowed. “Leave my head alone”, he mumbled childishly.

Magnus couldn’t contain his laugh. Alec was an incredibly complex personality but he was certainly one worth learning. Each new layer revealed to Magnus showed an entirely different aspect of Alec’s personality.

It was shocking to think that they had met only around 28 hours ago but had already managed to spend at least 15 of them together either watching the road pass by them in silence or sharing group banter at dinner. Magnus couldn’t deny the draw he felt towards Alec despite that short time as, with every passing moment they spent alone, Alec opened up just a _tiny_ bit more. Sure, the boy was far from open with Magnus but he felt like someone Magnus had none for weeks, not hours. The boy was distracting, enrapturing, alluring and so freaking attractive that Magnus desperately wanted to just throw the boy before him and have his way with him. That was, of course, inappropriate, but Magnus couldn’t help his own thoughts after all.

Alec noticed the faraway look in Magnus’ eyes from their many hours reminiscing on their lives back home late last night. They had spoken until everyone had pulled over to sleep and even longer after that, before Magnus finally returned to his own bed at around 2, and he had seen the older man just 6 hours later when he was cruelly woken up by him banging the RV door down, ready to hit the road.

Magnus smiled gently when he shook himself out of his thoughts and lead Alec eagerly towards another painting. As he watched Alec scrunch his eyebrows in determination, desperate to understand the art in front of him, Magnus felt a small twinge of affection for the boy.  He was nothing if not dedicated, something Magnus had seen in Alec’s love for his siblings, and despite being a terribly unartistic, uncreative person, he was desperate to see in the artwork the same thing Magnus did. It was so endearing that Magnus almost felt his heart clench.

After a moment of so, Magnus finally looked at the painting himself and smiled softly at the complexity of the image before him. It was far more his taste than the earlier work they had looked at.

“Why do you drive Cat’s RV?”

Magnus turned sharply to face Alec, who seemed to have a strong tendency to spring unexpected questions on Magnus… unexpectedly. Alec’s eyes remained on the painting but Magnus knew he was subtly watching out of the corner of his eye.

“It’s a nice RV?” Magnus said, although it was phrased as more of a question than an answer.

Alec finally turned to him with a smirk. “Yours is sparkly; I think that’s a little nicer.”

Magnus grinned cheekily. “It is”, he beamed in something akin to pride. Alec laughed softly at his smile but continued to wait for an answer.

Magnus took a deep breath. “Well… I mean, y-you know. I guess Cat- y’know, she didn’t…”

Alec, having never heard Magnus anything less than confident was surprised when the older man stuttered nervously. He watched as the Asian man beside him seemed to search his own mind for a believable answer.

“So, you’re hot, right?”

Alec blinked in surprise, startled by Magnus’ words. He found himself only able to make a vaguely-there grunt of confusion.

Magnus didn’t seem to notice and simply continued to speak.

“Well, I saw you, thought ‘Ooh he’s hot’ and decided that I wanted to drive whatever RV you were in because I wanted an excuse to see you because I’m weird and vaguely desperate it would seem and I’m also far too confident and forward for my own good.”

Alec felt more than he heard himself laugh. He wasn’t laughing at Magnus, on the contrary, he was laughing at the irony.

Magnus watched, slightly confused. It wasn’t like him to stutter or word-puke in front of a hot guy or girl; normally he was far more contained. But perhaps it was the fact that Magnus found himself liking not just Alec’s looks but also his personality that made him desperate to impress the man in front of him. When he heard Alec’s laugh, his mind panicked and he stared at Alec in shock.

Alec laughed softly, his eyes wide. “That’s sweet”, he said amusedly. “Vaguely creepy, but sweet.”

Magnus seemed lost for words. “Sweet?”

Alec nodded. “I’m not exactly going to sit and deny that I’m happy you did it. I like talking to you Magnus.”

Magnus noticed that Alec didn’t say _I like you, Magnus_ and to his own surprise he was grateful for that. He thoroughly enjoyed what he had seen of Alec thus far, physically and emotionally, and he knew that he liked him very much, but Magnus himself was not prepared to admit to such an embarrassing thing after only a day of knowing the man.

Alec was surprised when he realised that he was feeling more confident than Magnus in that moment. In a surge of self-assurance, Alec quickly pecked Magnus’ cheek before the man could so much as react and turned to leave the hall they were in. Over his shoulder, he threw Magnus a smile and a teasing “you’re sweet”.

Magnus grinned widely as he followed Alec eagerly, catching up the darker haired man and wrapping an arm around him. Alec froze in his arms as Magnus wound his arms around Alec’s waist from behind. Perhaps he expected Magnus to whisper seductively into his ear, maybe kiss his neck.

Magnus settled for hugging the man in his arms, and gently pecking his cheek in return. Alec attempted to turn around in Magnus’ arms but felt their pressure disappear and Magnus duck under his arm before he had the chance.

Alec watched Magnus walk quickly and merrily down the halls of the museum, a bounce in his step. He beamed at Magnus’ retreating figured and finally decided to race after him, desperate to continue their day.

 

…

 

When the group finally met at the café for some food, Magnus immediately noticed something was off. It was only 5 o’clock and while the 4 ½ hours they had spent at the museum had been longer than expected, it should not have worn Isabelle out to the point where she was slouched against the wall, her head in her hand and her hair obviously knotted; Magnus suspected she had been running her hands through it.

She was currently sitting alone at a large table that was no doubt being saved for their large group, the rest of them in line ready to order their meals. Magnus noticed Clary standing with Jace in the line, her eyes darting to and from Isabelle.

Eventually, Magnus decided to step in. He turned to Alec who had clearly picked up on his sister’s mood, and gently whispered into his ear what food he wanted. Alec watched him for a moment before nodding, sending Magnus a grateful smile. Magnus simply smiled in return and teasingly pecked Alec’s cheek.

He partially heard Alec mutter, “is this our thing now?” under his breath as Magnus approached Izzy and felt a surge of amusement and happiness as a result. _Our_ thing sounded vaguely intriguing.

When he reached the younger Lightwood, he slid into the seat opposite her and gently let his hands rest on hers. It took little effort to pry them from her face and gently hold them in his grip.

The Isabelle he saw underneath looked distraught, her eyes red and her lips slightly swollen from what Magnus assumed was constant lip-biting. He himself was prone to doing it too.

Her eyes met his and Magnus felt devastation when he saw how hollow they were. He watched as she straightened up slightly, brushing her hair from her face in an effort to compose herself. When she looked back at Magnus, he watched as she allowed whatever wall she had constructed to fall away.

“I did a bad thing”, she whispered.

Magnus leaned towards her, his interest piqued. He took her hands in his once more and squeezed them gently in encouragement.

Isabelle saw the look of complete affection and understanding deep in Magnus’ eyes and took a second to thank her lucky stars that he was there with her.

“I kissed Clary.”

Magnus leant away from Isabelle in shock, his mouth parting slightly in his surprise. He took a moment to compose himself before nodding gently in an effort to show her that he understood what she was saying.

“Well, technically she kissed me b-but I didn’t, like… push her away. I l-let it happen”, Isabelle said, her voice breaking with every word.

Magnus felt a strong desire to wrap his arms around her but simply settled on bringing her hands to his lips and dropping a kiss to them. He could feel Alec’s eyes on him from across the café and hoped that none of the other members of their group had noticed what was happening.

“You can’t help who you love, darling”, Magnus said, lips grazing her hands.

Izzy watched, shivering slightly at the feeling of his warm breath against her fingers. She nodded. “I know. But I can help whether or not I kiss them.”

Magnus shook his head sharply. “No. You didn’t do this. You didn’t kiss Clary and you didn’t create the cracks in her and Jace’s relationship that we can all see from a mile away. You didn’t cause this so you can’t blame yourself.”

“He’s my brother”, she whispered pathetically, dropping her head back into her hands with a whimper of despair. Magnus stroked her hair gently.

“Oh honey. You and I both know that Jace would never blame you for this”, Magnus pleaded. “He loves you so much, Izzy.”

Isabelle chuckled softly at the nickname. Nodding, she gasped for breath through her tears. “I- I know, I just… I don’t know what to do!”

Magnus nodded. “Understandable. But I’ll be here, okay? We can talk this through as much as you want; I’ll force everyone into Cat’s RV and we can get some booze, watch a film, and talk all about the struggles of liking someone.”

Izzy giggled, wiping her tears with the back of her hand. “Yeah, I’d like that.”

Magnus beamed as gently wiped away a stray tear. “Don’t blame yourself for loving her, Izzle. It’s all going to sort itself out yet, I promise you.”

“I know”, Izzy sighed. “And don’t think I didn’t see you kiss Alec. We’ll be discussing that later too.”

Magnus smiled at her tone, thankful for having had the ability to calm her down. He continued to distract her with playful, teasing words as he waited for the others to join them. When they did, Alec slid in beside Magnus, pressed closely against him as the rest of the group joined.

Magnus was grateful that Clary was sat on Izzy’s side of the booth, Jace and Simon between them. At least it ensured no awkward eye contact for Isabelle.

He felt Alec gently tap his thigh and, ignoring the sudden desire he felt at Alec’s fingers grazing his leg, he turned to the eldest Lightwood. At Alec’s look, Magnus nodded gently.

Alec’s eyes softened greatly and he let his palm rest against Magnus’ thigh. Both men attempted to ignore the sexual connotations of such physical contact and instead smiled at each other gently. Magnus felt his heart flutter and his chest compress at the soft look of adoration and gratefulness in Alec’s eyes.

“Thank you”, Alec mouthed.

Magnus smirked shyly, ignoring the look Isabelle sent him when Alec gently pressed a kiss to his cheeks, his lips lingering just a moment longer than necessary.

God, Alexander was going to be the death of him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So there you have it! Clizzy kissed! But what will happen next? 
> 
> Next chapter includes even more on the Clace relationship and is a super long chapter that also includes a good helping of Malec development too. Yay!
> 
> Let me know what you thought! I love all of your comments :D


	6. Did that just happen?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Magnus and Izzy have their slumber party. Alec and Magnus finally share a much anticipated moment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey lovelies (idk why),  
> This chapter was added in last night in a moment of madness and has changed the plot a little bit- I wasn't planning to do this so early but I really want to so.... eh. 
> 
> Magnus and Izzy do have their slumber party but this chapter is primarily MALEC :)
> 
> Dont worry though, next chapter explores a bit more of the Clace drama and the chapter after that in loaded with some Clizzy interactions (finally!)
> 
> Enjoy!

Chapter 6

Perhaps it wasn’t fair for Magnus to assume such, but Izzy seemed far calmer when they returned to the RV later that day and even more so a couple of days later. He didn’t want to brag, but the repeated smiles that he had received from both Isabelle and Alexander showed his success in cheering the younger Lightwood up.

The tension was undoubtedly still present and Alec, though he was unaware of what had caused it, had discovered it had something to do with Clary and presumably Jace too. Magnus hadn’t denied anything but he was also proud to say that he hadn’t caved when Alexander pouted and gave him ‘puppy dog eyes’. It was tough, but he did it.

In those few days Magnus and Isabelle had been firmly attached at the hip and she had spent most of her days in their RV, sitting between the pair and sharing conversation. The group had hardly left their RVs as it was decided that they would drive towards Oregon before stopping for another day out. Izzy had no complaints for it meant she was free to stay in Alec’s RV as much as she pleased throughout the day. The nights were admittedly harder since she shared a room with Cat and Clary but she had been welcomed into Magnus’ (and Ragnor’s) bed and had even been offered the couch. It had raised eyebrows but she was more comfortable sleeping squashed in Magnus’ arms then she was lying beside Clary.

The only negative thus far was the decision to keep driving meant that Magnus and Isabelle had been unable to have their planned “slumber party”. So, when they decided the pull over in a small town on the outskirts of California and Oregon a few days later, and park in a large field just opposite a hotel, they had decided that they would have it that night. Izzy was grateful as she wasn’t sure how much longer she could go without venting her emotions.

It was late in the afternoon when the group was eating a late dinner and were all lounged around the slightly larger dining table in Magnus’ RV eating convenience store sandwiches.  The tension was palpable even after a few days, but it was clear everyone was eager to ignore it.

 “Then she said something about Brooklyn’s mom calling, little guy was apparently crying down the line!” Cat said, eyes wide and sympathetic.

They were discussing _Pandemonium_ back home and Cat had begun to complain. She was moaning about how Tessa was receiving a constant string of phone calls from parents who had obviously ignored them when they had informed them of their summer vacation. Apparently several had phoned, crying children on the other end, distraught that lessons were cancelled.

“Oh no! Not Brooky!” Isabelle gasped. “He’s such a sweet little boy, aww.”

Magnus nodded. “He is! He did amazing at the showcase. But I do remember telling him at the event that we weren’t having summer classes this year?” It was phrased as a question but everyone could tell he was saying it more in disbelief than anything else; why hadn’t the parents listened when they were told the same?

“Man am I glad that we only work at the bar, right Raph?”

Raphael grinned from his seat, arm slung over Simon’s shoulders. “Me too”, he said, voice light and gentle.

Alec smirked in response. It was certainly nice to see Raphael in a good mood and it was especially nice to have everyone (including Ragnor, to his surprise) sitting around the table chatting. That wasn’t to say it was entirely comfortable, for the number of people much outweighed the number of seats. Most of them were squashed together and Clary had even been forced to sit on Jace’s lap to conserve space.

Magnus let out a vaguely sarcastic laugh. “Thank you very much Alexander but our job is far more _entertaining_ than yours.”

Alec beamed at Magnus, who was sitting beside Isabelle just opposite, the Lightwood in question leaning back against him slightly. Alec was surprised to feel such happiness at seeing how close the pair were, although it was to be expected since they worked together. And were the same person.

“Well, I happen to think that no work is the best of all”, Jace piped up from behind Clary. The grin on his face had become known to Magnus as his trademark look, his resting face.

“The only reason you have no work is because you got fired from your last job for being late all the damn time”, Clary sighed, swatting Jace’s arm.

Magnus and Cat let out surprised snorts while the rest of the group chuckled, knowing Jace well enough to appreciate such stories. The only one who did not laugh was Isabelle, who simply allowed a strained smile to slip onto her face. Alec, being her brother, saw right through it and frowned slightly.

Magnus caught Alec’s eyes and raised an eyebrow in question; Alec shook his head slightly. Their eyes locked momentarily before Magnus nodded, his lips twisting into a grin. This time Alec furrowed his eyebrows in confusion but Magnus ignored him and simply whispered something into Izzy’s ear. Izzy seemed to relax a little and nodded slightly.

“Okay everyone!” Magnus cried, startling even Izzy, who sat up quickly. “Everyone out! Isabelle and myself are having our own slumber party and you are not invited!”

His voice, deeper than usual, was loud enough to sound vaguely like a megaphone in their small space. Alec felt a strong sense of relief when he took in what Magnus was saying and he felt a small burst of affection for the man. He smiled gently at Izzy who seemed to find the entire exchange amusing and she teasingly raised a brow, nodding towards Magnus with a leer on her face. Alec felt himself blush and quickly looked away, grin still firmly in place.

Immediately, voices grew louder in protest and people began to complain. Raphael seemed far from bothered and whispered something to Simon about “securing their room”. Alec found himself chuckling; Raphael knew his priorities in the situation.

“Hang on, woah! How is that fair?” Jace cried. “Where the hell will everyone sleep?”

“Not in our room”, Simon said as he and Raphael shuffled past everyone to exit the RV hastily, no doubt to claim their territory. Alec bit his lip to contain his laugh.

“C’mon Magnus! Not all of us can fit in that tiny RV!” Catarina complained. Magnus rolled his eyes.

“Oh my! You act as though you’re going to be homeless or something, it’s only for one night! Plus, Clary and Jace share the other room in the RV, Ragnor sleeps on the roof because let’s face it he doesn’t care, and Cat you can sleep on the couch in there.”

Everyone was silent and Alec was shocked to actually see a seemingly intrigued look on Ragnor’s face- _was he actually thinking about it?_

“Woah, woah, woah! What about me? I need to sleep too”, Alec eventually said, when it appeared that the remaining people were speechless.

Izzy’s eyes lit up slightly. “You can just join us big brother”, she said, matter-of-factly.

Jace looked betrayed. “Excuse me?!”

“Ignoring that, we are not all squeezing into a tiny RV!” Cat continued. Magnus looked at her hesitantly, eyes tired. He should have known she would refuse to do it.

Eventually Magnus sighed and stood up from his seat slowly. Alec watched him curiously as the older man, back slightly slouched, trudged into what was no doubt his and Ragnor’s room. Everyone looked between the group in confusion but their question was quickly answered when Magnus returned with a gold card in hand.

“There’s a hotel down the street. If you order room service I will kill you”, he said. Alec could tell from his eyes that he was reluctant but one glance at Isabelle and Magnus’ back straightened and his voice became harder. “Before I change my mind”, he warned.

The remaining people sprang into action with Cat quickly snatching up Magnus’ card and dragging Ragnor out of the RV. When he protested that they needed to pack pyjamas Cat simply laughed and explained that “we’ll buy some!” to which Magnus glared. Jace quickly pushed Clary from his lap and grabbed her hand, dragging her with him to his RV to locate some clothes. Magnus attempted to protest that the RV was room enough for him but Jace refused to acknowledge him, eager to sleep in a comfortable bed.

Alec looked back at Magnus in such awe that Magnus felt himself blush under the Lightwood’s gaze.

Isabelle broke the spell. “You have the money for that?”

Magnus shrugged emotionlessly before settling back into his seat beside her. “Eh, not really. I mean, yeah I do. But warning, my contributions for the next few days won’t be all that much.”

Alec, still baffled, continued to stare at Magnus. It was confusing how someone who he had known for such a short time could make his heart clench in the way Magnus was able to. Alec knew that his weak spot was always his family, and seeing Magnus clearly share as strong an affection for Izzy as he had for Alec, was endearing and made his heart flutter just a little bit. Alec was in far too deep with this man.

After a few moments, Alec managed to snap himself out of it and decided to make himself scarce. It was clear the two had initially planned for time alone and he was the last person that wanted to interrupt that.

When he rose from his seat, two pairs of eyes locked on him and watched him leave.

“Where are you going?”

Alec turned back and shrugged. “I have a bed to myself tonight”, he said jokingly. “Plus you guys want your night alone and that’s fine by me.” He sent Izzy an affectionate smile and looked at Magnus with eyes that he hoped expressed his deepest gratitude.

Magnus felt his breath catch at the look in Alec’s eyes. They were softer than Magnus had ever seen them and the affection held within them startled and pleased him simultaneously. He watched Alec cast his eyes once more to Izzy before teasingly touching his cheek, lips pouted in Magnus’ direction to blow a kiss. Magnus heard himself laugh as Alexander winked before exiting the RV.

Lost for words, Magnus settled back into the cushions of the couch with a dazed smile on his face. “God… your brother is going to kill me”, he eventually said, although it was more of a sigh.

Izzy laughed merrily and leant down to snuggle into Magnus’ arms. “You two are so cute”, she giggled quietly, squeezing Magnus in a hug.

The warmth and, dare he say it, love that he felt for Isabelle in that moment was immeasurable and he wrapped his arms around her tightly in an attempt to show her that.

 

 

…

 

 

For Alec, the night progressed slowly. He had settled on reading a book when he realised that Raphael and Simon weren’t coming out any time soon and after easily finishing it he had decided to settle back and try to sleep. It was nice without Jace around for it meant that Alec could lounge in his boxers, less at the mercy of the surprisingly warm night air.

He was ever so close to achieving said goal when he heard the rattling of the RV door open and the sound of mumbling and giggling. He prayed it wasn’t Clary and Jace, perhaps returning from their hotel room. He brushed aside the thought however, knowing that even he had the common sense to sleep in a hotel if given the choice.

That meant it could only be one thing.

“Psst! Alec!”

He slowly sat up, recognising the voice easily, and quickly threw on a t-shirt. He hurried out of his room and into the main-kitchen-area of the RV and was met with the, admittedly hilarious, sight of Isabelle and Magnus stumbling around, arms wrapped around each other tightly.

When Izzy noticed him she beamed and pushed Magnus away with a loud cry of Alec’s name. He caught her in his arms easily, laughing when he heard her incoherent mumbling.

“She’s a little bit drunk”, Magnus informed from across the room.

When Alec looked at him, it was clear that without Isabelle heavily leaning on him, Magnus was reasonably sober. Well, sober enough to stand and talk without any problems.

“She found a bottle of wine in Ragnor’s bag and decided it was hers. She’s fine; we talked enough for her to calm down and let everything out but after a while she just wanted to have fun.” Magnus explained, “Now in my opinion, sex is fun, but she wasn’t down for that.”

Alec smirked slightly, his smile hidden behind the mass of Izzy’s hair that was smothering his face. Izzy was giggling slightly and mumbled something about kisses and “pretty paintings of women”. Alec did _not_ want to know.

“Okaaay, Izzy. Time for bed”, Alec said as he began to tug her towards his room. He gently, with the help of Magnus, helped to move her onto the bed and remove her tight jeans. When she was in just her shirt and underwear, Alec swung her legs under the covers and pulled them up over her. For all of her earlier noise, Izzy was now silent and only let out a grateful hum when Alec kissed her forehead gently.

Grabbing one of the spare pillows, Alec left her to sleep, Magnus trailing behind him.

It was only when a particularly cold gust of wind flew in through the open doorway that Alec was reminded of how he was only in boxers and a shirt. Shivering at the cold breeze on his legs, Alec inadvertently drew Magnus’ attention south as well.

Alec heard Magnus let out what was close to a groan. “God Alexander. Put some clothes on before I remove what little you still have on!”

Alec spun to face Magnus who, despite the small, almost non-existent smile on his face, looked deadly serious. Alec shifted uncomfortably for a moment, unsure what to say, before he settled for stumbling backwards into the couch and placing the pillow across his lap to reduce the amount of skin on show.

Magnus’ eyes still lingered, dragging slowly across his bare legs, up to his collar and finally to his face. Alec didn’t say anything but he could tell from looking at him that Magnus’ eyes were locked firmly on his lips, or maybe his chin, although Alec doubted that.

Finally, Magnus shook himself out of it however his eyes remained full of steamy determination. He walked towards Alec with purpose and Alec felt his body tense and shiver in anticipation. When Magnus reached him he put his hand out, steering it towards the pillow Alec held over his crouch and Alec felt his heart pummel against the rib cage in his chest. His breath stuttered and his eyes remained locked on Magnus’ as he felt the slight pressure, the dip in the pillow, as Magnus clasped his hand.

To his surprise, Magnus pulled abruptly on his hand, tugging Alec to his feet and into his arms. Alec stared in shock for a moment, not sure what to expect before Magnus stepped back and began to pull him in the direction of the door.

Alec protested, pulling his arm in an attempt to free it but Magnus ignored him, dragging him outside and into the chilly air. Magnus swung the RV door shut and without a word pulled Alec towards his own sparkling black RV and inside.

Any and all words died on Alec’s tongue when he realised where Magnus was dragging him and he felt his blood rush south. Despite his best efforts, Alec’s blood soured in excitement as Magnus swung open his bedroom door.

Magnus finally dropped his hand in order to close the bedroom door and when he turned back to face Alec, his eyes were dark with temptation. Alec blinked rapidly a few times and looked across the room to the bed.

It was slightly larger than the one Alec and Jace shared, perhaps a king compared to their double. It looked tidy and inviting and were it not for the two bags sitting in the far corner, Alec would have assumed that no one had even stayed in the room yet.

“Ragnor is a neat freak”, Magnus said, by way of explanation.

The sound of his voice made Alec raise his eyes back to Magnus, who looked at him expectantly. When Alec remained rooted on the spot, Magnus walked towards him with a short laugh  and gently pushed him backwards until his knees gave out and he fell back against the sheets of the bed.

Alec’s heartbeat echoed in his ears and his breath became uneven and short, almost gasps. Magnus seemed to be unaware as he rummaged through a bag a few feet in front of the bed. He pulled out a pair of pyjamas and nodded towards the door that Alec assumed was attached to the bathroom.

When Magnus went to leave, Alec couldn’t contain his confusion and disappointment and the look on his face must have shown it for Magnus paused.

“I’ll be back in a moment”, he promised. “I wasn’t going to let you sleep on the couch.”

Magnus disappeared behind the door and Alec let out a breath. His heart was still racing and he felt slightly dizzy from all the blood rushing to his head. He calmed himself down, disappointed at not only the fact that clearly what he had expected was not happening but also at the fact that he had been so eager to do so—what had gotten into him?!

Alec decided to wait for Magnus before moving and when the older man returned he chuckled at the sight of Alec still spread across the bed. He felt his eyes fall to Alec’s crotch which was undeniably prominent, but he only allowed himself a moment’s glance before ignoring it completely. He walked around to what was normally Ragnor’s side of the bed and slipped under the covers, pushing Alec slightly until the man in question rolled onto ‘Magnus’’ side.

Alec looked at Magnus in shock but eventually slipped under the covers too. His eyes remained locked on Magnus, who did the same in return. The look they shared was hesitant, nervous, and everything in between. Alec turned onto his side, arm tucked under his head, and looked at Magnus who moved to lay in a similar position.

Alec refrained from asking why Magnus was insisting they share a room and as a result, a bed, instead of putting him in Cat’s room. Instead he asked, “you have an ensuite in this place?”

Magnus chuckled quietly, as though talking too loud would break the spell that had settled over them. “It’s the entire RV’s bathroom but this room just happens to have a door leading to it directly. Hence why I claimed this room, not that I ever use it, but since no one else is here and we’re alone…”

Alec nodded, his eyes fixed on Magnus. “Yeah. We are”, he whispered, his breath weak.

Magnus blinked slowly, eyes dark and lips opening and closing as though there was something he wanted to say. The lack of awkwardness between them was refreshing but the undeniable sexual tension that had settled between them was thick enough to cut with a knife. Magnus took a moment to spare a thought of changing his mind and sending Alec to Cat’s room but he quickly dismissed it; kicking Alec out would mean losing the sight in front of him.

Alec, laying on his side, hair untidy and body bare save boxers and a shirt was so much better than Magnus could have imagined. The dark, unsure look in his eyes and the way he bit his lip nervously made him look debauched and the desire that flowed through Magnus in that moment was overwhelming.

God, this man was beautiful.

After a few moments of silence, knowing looks of desire being exchanged between them, Alec began to shuffle closer. Magnus managed to hide his shock behind a soft smile of encouragement and he slowly turned until he was flat on his back. Alec moved slowly towards him and eventually settled against his side, head resting just over his collar bone and hand nervously and lightly resting on one of his pecs. Alec felt fire in his veins at the contact that, even through a t-shirt, lit his skin in flames.

He looked nervously up at Magnus.

The only light remaining in the room was the soft, warm glow of the bedside lamp. It was a small lamp, shade half broken and bulb flickering slightly. It cast a shadow across Magnus’ face and Alec found himself drawn to the details he could now see due to the little distance between them.

The air was ripe with electricity and both men felt the hair on the skin erect at the tension that grew between them when Alec’s eyes fell to stare hungrily at Magnus’ lips.

Magnus groaned internally. He had promised himself that he would not make the first move and that the only time they would ever kiss would be if Alec himself initiated it. But in this moment Magnus wished he had made no such promise, for stopping himself from kissing Alec was the hardest thing he had ever had to do.

“Thank you”, Alec whispered. The lamp beside them lit Alec’s eyes and they beautifully reflected the light as he looked up at Magnus.

“For what?”

Alec felt his eyes moisten and water just slightly. He didn’t know why, but they did. “For being there for my sister. I know I don’t know what exactly happened but I know that whatever you did and said helped her. So thank you.”

Magnus nodded. In that moment he was reminded once more of the fierce love Alec had for his family and no doubt his friends too. His selfless, caring nature was ingrained so deeply in him that Magnus was sure the man himself never even noticed when he was becoming protective.

Alec watched Magnus and knew in that moment that he desperately needed to kiss him. He wasted not a moment more when he saw Magnus lick his lip absentmindedly, his mind obviously elsewhere. Using the moment of confidence he had, Alec lent up towards Magnus and dropped his lips to the skin of his cheek.

Magnus startled at the feel of Alec’s lips against his cheek, the pressure pleasant. Alec’s lips were surprisingly smooth and gentle, barely hovering over his skin. Magnus groaned internally in desperation when Alec pulled away gently.

He hardly moved further than a millimetre away though before he placed another kiss against Magnus’ cheek, this was only slightly further right. The kiss was so slow that for a moment Magnus doubted it was even happening but when he finally felt Alec’s lips he let out a quiet sigh.

Alec almost whimpered at the sound of Magnus sighing and drew his lips back once more, pressing another kiss just right of the last. This time, Alec felt the corner of his lips graze Magnus’ and both men froze.

Alec went rigid and his breath fell heavily against Magnus’ cheek. He pulled back ever so slowly from Magnus to afford himself the chance to look into the older man’s eyes. Magnus looked at Alec with such a primal hunger that without a moment more of hesitation, Alec kissed him.

Once again the pressure was almost non-existent but Magnus felt sparks of electricity shoot up his fingers. The faint but definitely there feeling of Alec’s plump, moist lips against his was both disappointing and exhilarating. Disappointing purely because it just _wasn’t enough._

Alec heard the quiet groan of frustration that fell from Magnus’ lips and ever so gently felt the growing pressure of Magnus kissing back. Magnus let their lips move against each other slowly, so slowly that their breaths mingled and Alec’s gasp was shared between them as Magnus opened his mouth to capture Alec’s lips. Alec let out an inaudible whimper when Magnus caught his lower lip between his and their kiss gradually grew deeper.

They still moved unhurriedly, attempting to savour every moment of the contact between them. As Magnus kissed him again, Alec heard the wet sound of Magnus’ and his own lips meeting and felt a primal need for more.

Alec’s hands shot into Magnus’ hair, relishing in the groan it drew from Magnus who immediately began to press harder against Alec’s lips. Their kiss grew in pace and soon enough their tongues met. Alec’s breath stuttered at the feel of Magnus’ tongue sweeping across the seam of his lips before exploring the cavern of his mouth with such exciting desperation that Alec was powerless to match his enthusiasm.

Alec settled back and Magnus followed, slowly leaning over the younger man to eagerly plunder his mouth, the breath exchanged between them slowly morphing into barely-there moans. Alec’s hands combed through Magnus’ hair in an attempt to gain more control of the kiss but Magnus remained dominant, bending Alec to his will and taking what he had desperately wanted for what felt like years.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed that and that you felt it was a good first kiss. If you hated it.... let me know, I guess. 
> 
> You guys can follow me on tumblr (in fact I encourage it :D ) where I'll post some general updates about what I'm doing for the story as I'm doing it if that so interests you: http://justmagnusbane.tumblr.com/
> 
> LOVE YOUR FEEDBACK (and you) ;)
> 
> ~ Emma


	7. Complicated

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More about Clary and Jace's crumbling relationship is revealed to be more than just arguments and Alec and Magnus deal with the consequences of their kiss. Meanwhile, Clary makes a devastating promise she's not sure she'll be able to keep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Clary and Jace's relationship gets a whole new dimension this chapter... and boy oh boy... next chapter O.o
> 
> Also, Malec goodness up ahead!
> 
> (Also for anyone confused, I did change Nevada to Oregon because I've decided on a different route for them and I also changed caravan to RV because I'm stupid and didn't realize that caravans are the ones attached to cars whereas RVs drive themselves... ignore me)
> 
> Tumblr: justmagnusbane

Chapter 7

Alec woke slowly the following morning and began to gradually become aware of the light sweeping of fingers across his lower back. He was reminded instantly of what had happened last night, how he had finally kissed Magnus and how the pair had fallen asleep shortly after wrapped contently in one another’s arms.

Raising his head from Magnus’ chest, Alec looked around him for a moment.

The room was still immaculate and their clothes were still firmly in place. Alec was grateful- despite the fact that they had finally kissed after all their shared moments of fighting their desires, Alec knew he would only regret going any further just yet.

When he looked down at Magnus he smiled. Magnus was watching him was a grin and his vibrant and alert eyes told Alec he had been awake for a while. Alec didn’t doubt that Magnus had watched him the whole time.

“Morning beautiful”, Magnus said teasingly.

Alec’s smile widened. “Morning”, he said, voice hoarse. “What are we doing today again?”

Magnus sat up slowly, bringing Alec with him. The pair took a moment to stretch before Magnus responded. “Driving to Oregon, finally. Then I think we’re just driving for a while until we find somewhere to eat, where we’ll no doubt plan out a Oregon route.”

Alec nodded. “So, you’re driving today?”

Magnus smiled gently and let his hand rest on Alec’s thigh, vaguely reminiscent of the time in the museum several days ago. “Yes, baby. I am.”

“Baby? That’s a new one.”

Magnus panicked for a small moment, worried that Alec would protest. After all, they had not once discussed what they were and for all Magnus knew last night could have merely been a kiss to Alec, nothing more. But then Magnus was reminded of the museum, the teasing and the fact that whatever affection he felt for Alec was directly reflected in Alec’s own eyes.

Alec smiled gently. “I kinda like it, weirdly enough. More so than cupcake”, Alec laughed, faking a cringe as he remembered being called such by Magnus days earlier.

Magnus grinned and nodded, filing away that information for safekeeping.

“I should probably get back to my room before everyone returns and sees me. God knows what they’ll think.”

Magnus couldn’t resist wrapping his arms around Alec’s waist and digging his face into the younger man’s neck. Alec giggled, fucking _giggled._

“Let them think whatever they want to think”, Magnus grumbled.

Alec ignored the swooping in his stomach and shook his head, laughing. “No way. No one is seeing me in my boxers, Magnus.”

Magnus grinned into Alec’s neck. “Except me, y’mean?”

Alec shook his head but he couldn’t stop smiling. “I hate you” he found himself mumbling.

“Keep telling yourself that, darling.”

 

 

…

 

When everyone returned to their RVs, Alec thankfully making it back to Cat’s without anyone seeing, they set off once more.They were quick to make their way into Oregon and almost immediately the rain began to pour. Despite it being summer, Oregon obviously felt the rules didn’t apply, and the temperate had fallen drastically since leaving California.

As they drove through the heavy rain later that same day, Alec, Simon and Jace found themselves lounging in the dining area with Raphael, Izzy and Magnus talking cheerfully up front.  Clary and Cat had found themselves alone (excluding Ragnor) and were more than willing to hang out together; they had grown rather close.

“Okay seriously, what’s going on with you and Clary?” Alec found himself asking after a moment or two of silence. After witnessing Isabelle’s sadness last night and knowing that Clary and Jace were something to do with it, Alec was too impatient to simply wait the situation out. It just wasn’t fair to his baby sister.

Simon nodded from beside Alec. “Yeah, Clary’s been acting weird lately and she seems kinda upset.”

Jace hung his head in what appeared to be shame and for a passing moment Alec prayed his brother hadn’t done something ridiculous. The blond remained silent until Alec said his name in warning. Looking up at the pair, eyes lingering on Simon, Jace frowned.

“Okay, but don’t hate me.”

Alec and Simon exchanged a worried glance before nodding.

Jace looked nervous as he spoke. “The night before we left for the trip, Clary and I got into a little fight”, he began. “She had told me something and I guess I didn’t take to it well.”

“What did she tell you?” Simon asked.

Jace glared at him. “I was getting to that.” Simon watched as Jace nervously cast his eyes to Alec who raised his eyebrows in encouragement.

“Clary told me she’s bisexual.”

The silence that overcame the group was tense. Simon appeared shocked and disgruntled whereas Alec stared in confusion. Jace had lowered his head nervously.

“Hang on, she actually told you?”

“You knew?” Jace gasped.

“Of course I knew” Simon said, frowning. “I’m her best friend!”

Jace squared his shoulders at Simon’s glare.

Alec stared Jace down before leaning forward slowly. “Why didn’t you take to it well?” he asked, voice deeper than he had expected. It was almost menacing.

Jace grimaced. “I just… didn’t expect it.”      

“Does it disgust you? Is that why you got upset?” Alec asked sternly. “’Cos she likes the same sex?”

Jace looked insulted. “No, Alec. You know I have no problem with you being gay!”

“But this isn’t about me, Jace! Why were you upset about it?” Alec demanded, his instincts making him fiercely protective of the girl he had come to identify as one of his closest friends.

Jace looked as though he were close to tears, something Alec had never seen in all of their years of friendship. “I just didn’t know how to handle it, okay! I won’t lie and say that it doesn’t make me uncomfortable.”

“Uncomfortable?” Simon spoke up. “Why would it make you uncomfortable when you’re surrounded by not-straight people?”

Jace growled. “I don’t know maybe because she’s my girlfriend!”

“What does that have to do with it?!”

Alec watched the exchange with a raised and curious eyebrow. He studied the pair carefully, making sure they weren’t growing loud enough to draw attention from Magnus or Raphael in the front. Or, God forbid, Izzy.

Speaking of Magnus…

“So is it the bisexual thing?”

Jace raised his eyes to meet his brother’s. Awkwardly, he shuffled in his seat. “I don’t know”, he answered honestly. “It’s just that now I feel like there’s twice as many people she could leave me for, I guess. And…”, his voice dropped into a whisper. “Maybe I’m just being paranoid but have you seen her around Izzy lately?”

Alec sighed. He, of course, knew that something had happened between the girls and now, with the new information, he wouldn’t be surprised if the kisses Izzy had mentioned the night before were ones shared with the redhead. But he couldn’t tell Jace that. “I’ll admit that yes, I’ve seen it. At least I think I’ve seen it.”

Simon looked defensive. “Just because she’s bisexual doesn’t mean she’s more likely to cheat on you.”

Jace nodded solemnly. “I know that. But don’t deny that you’ve seen them too.”

Simon remained silent and instead avoided Jace’s eye. Jace’s head sunk into his hands.

Alec reached across to gently pat his brother’s shoulder. “Jace, that doesn’t mean anything. So what, maybe Clary thinks she’s attractive? That doesn’t mean she wants to be with her instead of you.”

“But what if she does? And what if lately we’ve been having so many arguments that I wouldn’t blame her for wanting to?”

Alec was in shock. He had never seen Jace quite so serious, panicked and distraught over anything in his life. And he had helped to support the blond when he had lost his biological parents. Admittedly, Jace was very young and it hadn’t registered to such an extent that he understood it, but it was still shocking to see him react so strongly to this.

It was in that moment that Alec saw from the first time just how passionately Jace loved Clary.

“So what happened last night? In the hotel?”

Jace shrugged. “We barely spoke. I tried to get her to talk to me but things have been so awkward and strained between us since the museum a couple of days ago.”

Alec thought back to his sister’s distress that day and knew that it no doubt confirmed his suspicions. They had kissed.

“Look, Jace. I don’t really know wh-”

“-SHIT!”

The three boys startled as the RV suddenly came to a halt. They jumped from their seats to join Raphael, Izzy and Magnus at the front of the truck. Raphael was standing and attempting to lean far enough forward to see over the RV’s front but clearly couldn’t.

Alec looked ahead of them and noticed that the other RV was nowhere in sight- they must have become separated in earlier traffic.

Now though, they were stationary on what appeared to be a very empty road. It was surrounded by trees, all of them raining water, the mud beneath them becoming stickier by the minute. Alec could take a guess at what had happened.

“Really?” Magnus growled as he once again attempted to drive. The rattling and splashing noise Alec heard in response confirmed his suspicions.

“We’re stuck?”

Magnus nodded. “Oh yes we are. And it’s gonna be fucking difficult to get us out.”

Alec, having heard Magnus swear very few times before now, felt a small almost unnoticeable shiver down his spine. He was reminded of last night, the feeling of Magnus against him, dominating his every sense, the feeling of his hair in his fingers, his lips-

Repressing his startlingly disturbing thoughts, Alec quickly moved to slip his combat boots on.

Jace watched him. “What are you doing?”

“Going to get us un-stuck?”

Magnus and Raphael turned to Alec in shock as he finished doing his laces. He looked around the room briefly before his eyes landed on something just behind Magnus and he reached over the older man to snatch his jacket. Magnus attempted to ignore the burning in his stomach when Alec bent over him. They had both agreed not to share the news of their impromptu kiss and Magnus wasn’t going to give it away by letting out the groan he felt rising in his chest.

“Hey, woah!” Magnus protested as he swung on the jacket. “That was expensive!”

Alec looked at Magnus dubiously. “Don’t lie. I’ve got the exact same one at home.”

Magnus gaped. “I.. well, sometimes comfort is more important!” he defended vehemently. He watched as Alec sent him a fond smile and attempted not to stare at the younger man’s lips as they widened.

Alec shook his head with a soft smile. “Whatever. Back in a minute.”

And with that he left the RV, ignoring Izzy’s shouting.

As the door opened, the loud crashing of the rain met Magnus’ ears and he winced. A sharp chill shot through him and Simon ran to quickly close the door.

“He’s gonna die out there”, Simon said in awe, holding his arms around himself against the warmth.

 

 

…

 

 

Alec had surprisingly managed to hand-dig out enough of the thick mud to give Magnus enough of a chance to move from the pothole of dirt they were trapped in. In the process, he had been soaked through to the bone, his teeth clashing with every breath he took. When he got back inside, he looked so cold that Magnus didn’t have the heart to moan at him for covering his jacket in mud.

Immediately, Jace and Izzy had shipped the boy off to the bathroom and had forced him to strip his cold clothes and jump into the shower. Leaving the room, Jace held Alec’s clothes in his arms. He threw them into the washing machine with a disgruntled sigh and then quickly headed to his and Alec’s room to retrieve fresh clothes for the boy.

From the looks of things, he had retrieved a pair of Alec’s sweatpants and a thick hoody.

Within the time that Alec had showered, Jace standing close by outside the door should he need anything, Magnus and Raphael had stopped at a small shop to get some supplies for both the car and Alec.

Magnus returned to the RV with armloads of soup and medicine and was to his surprise, was met with the sight of Alec stumbling from the bathroom. Magnus quickly moved to catch him, faster than Jace who at first remained unaware, and dropped all of his purchases to the floor.

Catching Alec in his arms, Magnus quickly straightened the boy out but left his arms around him.

Alec sniffled quietly. “T-thanks”, he said.

“You okay big brother?” Izzy asked worriedly as she exited his bedroom and saw what had happened.

Alec nodded weakly, leaning heavily on Magnus.

Magnus watched him as he appeared to sway slightly and immediately tightened his grip.

“C’mon baby, time for bed”, Magnus said affectionately as he helped Alec to stagger towards the bedroom. Alec grumbled slightly at Magnus’ use of the term of endearment but Magnus just chuckled in response.

Jace and Izzy followed closely.

Magnus gently helped Alec onto the bed, and quickly set to work wrapping Alec in the bed sheets, tucking them tightly around him. Alec looked embarrassed but didn’t protest as he sunk deeper into the mattress. Magnus didn’t allow himself more than a moment or two to watch the boy’s eyes flutter closed.

Jace weaved around Magnus, stripping off his shirt and shoes. Magnus watched him in alarm.

“What are you doing?” Magnus cried.

Jace rolled his eyes. “Relax- we’re brothers. I’m just sharing body heat to keep him warm.”

Magnus couldn’t resist the swooping feeling of jealousy in his stomach when a half-naked Jace slid in beside Alec and wrapped him in his arms. “I’m sure he’s fine without it, y’know.”

Jace looked up at him, a knowing smile on his lips. “Just go let Cat know what’s happened and find out where they are”, he said not unkindly.

Magnus frowned deeply, ignoring Isabelle’s chuckles, but did so, pushing aside any green thoughts.

 

 

…

 

 

Around an hour later they managed to catch up to and find the others. It didn’t take them long before they had pulled over and Magnus greeted a somewhat weary looking Catarina.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing”, Cat sighed. “Just this weather, putting a damper on our trip.”

Magnus nodded in agreement before he smiled. “Well the forecast is all dry tomorrow.”

Catarina cheered up at that and came to join him in the front. “So, Alec okay?”

“I wouldn’t know”, Magnus _huffed._ “Jace is the one snuggled up to him.”

Cat raised an eyebrow before an ear-splitting grin spread across her face. “I knew it!” she cried quietly. “You totally like Alec.”

Magnus shrugged, unashamed. “What’s not to like? He’s beautiful, and really hot.”

“I take it that beautiful wasn’t in regards to his physical self then?” Cat teased.

Magnus blushed only slightly, although he would deny it were Catarina to confront him. “He’s just sweet okay. I just… so what? If I like him, so what?”

Sensing distress, Cat quickly smiled. “Nothing, honestly. I think it’s cute. And from what _little_ you’ve told me”, she glared, “he seems into you too.”

Magnus remained silent for a moment before looking up at the woman he considered his best friend. For years he had told her everything. How could he not tell her this?

“We kissed. Last night.”

Cat mouth dropped open and her eyes widened comically. Magnus thought she looked like a cartoon. “No way”, she mumbled through her hands. Magnus nodded. “Aw! Was it good?”

“So good”, Magnus sighed, reminiscing. “His lips…. Urgh.”

Catarina recoiled slightly. “Woah, okay. I love you honey but that’s enough detail.”

Magnus laughed, feeling light and free, despite the still present jealously he felt.

“You can’t tell anyone.”

“What?” Cat stared at him in confusion. “Why not?”

Magnus shrugged slightly. “We’ve haven’t spoken about it yet and I wouldn’t be surprised if Alec wanted us to be kept a secret for a little.”

“Do _you_ want to be a secret?”

Magnus looked down at his hands nervously for a moment before meeting his best friend’s eyes. “To be honest… yeah, I do. I want to be able to grow closer, get to know each other in every way imaginable before we tell anyone. Considering how little privacy and space we have to get to know each other, I want to keep it on the down low for now.”

Cat nodded in understanding, “It is your relationship after all”, she said kindly.

Magnus grinned. A _relationship_. With _Alexander_.

 

 

…

 

 

It was late that night that Alec woke up again and despite having felt the presence of someone else when he fell asleep earlier, the bed was empty when he woke. Checking his phone, he saw an unread message from his brother.

 

**Jace, 9:26pm**

_Gone to talk 2 Clary. C U in the morning. Theres soup in the kitchen cabinet_  
  
P.s yes we snuggled

Alec blushed but rolled his eyes affectionately at his little brother. Feeling slightly warmer but incredibly light-headed, Alec decided to get up and grab some of the soup Jace mentioned.

His legs felt weak beneath him but he managed to make his way out into the kitchen, ignoring the pounding in his skull.

He startled when he blinked and suddenly a glass of water was in his face. Stumbling backwards into the wall, Alec let out a gasp.

“Sorry”, Magnus laughed nervously. He stepped towards Alec and held out the drink and a closed fist. Alec hesitantly accepted the glass and held out his own hand to catch the meds Magnus had handed him.

“What are you doing here?” Alec asked quietly, swallowing the tablets.

Magnus looked almost offended at first but he straightened up with a smile. “When Jace headed to see Clary I said I’d stay here and keep an eye on you.”

Alec looked confused. “From out here?”

Magnus laughed. “Well I didn’t want to creep on you.”

“It wouldn’t be creepy if you were just looking out for me”, Alec insisted.

Magnus looked unconvinced as he moved to the cabinet and pulled out a can of soup, surprisingly Alec’s favourite. As he started to make it, he turned back to Alec. “You say that now but I don’t think that you would have liked waking up to me suddenly in your bed. Not that I’d mind climbing into bed with you. Again”, he teased.

Alec felt himself smile and was shocked to feel no heat in his cheeks. He grinned back at Magnus. “I certainly liked it last night.”

Magnus’ head snapped up to meet his and for a moment he looked ready to pass out. Alec wondered whether it was the cold or the meds that had lowered his inhibitions to such a degree.

“ _Did_ you now?”  Magnus grinned. Alec simply rolled his eyes, which only made Magnus smile wider, eyes yearning. Alec looked away quickly, avoiding a gaze filled with lust that he was all too familiar with at this point.

“So, uh, thank you. Y’know, for staying anyway”, he added nervously.

Magnus turned back to the soup, preparing it with little thought. Head hung as he stirred the soup, Magnus smiled. “No problem.”

There was a short silence between them before Magnus felt brave enough to ask. “So do you know why Jace went to talk to Clary?”

Alec looked slightly unwilling at first but eventually sighed. “Not really. He told us why they’re arguing but that was it.”

“Oh?”

“Clary’s bisexual.”

“I never would have guessed”, Magnus said with a hint of sarcasm.

Alec smiled. “Can I take a guess and say that the problems Iz was having these past few days was guilt because they kissed at the museum earlier this week?”

Magnus nodded absentmindedly. “Sexy _and_ perceptive”, he said softly.

Alec was quiet for a moment as he watched Magnus move about the small kitchen. “Can we talk about last night?”

Magnus’ body went rigid at the words and the deep-rooted fear settled back into his bones- Alec thought it was a mistake. He turned to look at the younger man slowly, taking a moment to swallow nervously before nodding.

Alec smiled softly, hoping it would reassure making and rid his face of the panic Alec so clearly saw. “What are we?”

“Whatever you want us to be”, Magnus answered immediately. Alec nodded in thought.

“Well, I really like what we did last night”, he mumbled shyly.

Magnus felt himself relax as he smiled. “Me too”, he said softly as he approached Alec. When Alec was backed into the wall of the RV, Magnus’ arms bracketing him and keeping him there, Magnus leaned forward and let his lips hover over Alec’s. “Wanna do it again?”

Alec bit his lip, smiling. He slowly nodded. When their lips met again, Magnus pulled Alec closer and wrapped his arms around him. Alec was grateful for the warmth because his body was still shivering.

The kiss was far less exploratory than their first but was still soft and full of passion. Magnus knew that should they keep this up, he would soon have developed an addiction to the taste and feel of Alec’s lips against his.

When Magnus pulled away slightly, he let his head rest against Alec’s.

“So, how about we just… see how this goes?”

Alec _hummed_ in agreement before pulling back just slightly. “Listen, Magnus. It’s not that I don’t want to be with you publicly but-”

“It’s fine”, Magnus chuckled quietly as he leant forwards again to rest his forehead against Alec’s. “Me too.”

He heard Alec sigh in relief and the peace that settled over them made Magnus want to just sink into Alexander’s arms and never leave. He let his hands fall to Alec’s waist, ignoring the man’s breath as it hitched.

“Are you worried about Izzy too?”

Alec chuckled humourlessly but nodded, his eyes slipping closed due to the tranquil silence that settled between them. “I’m more worried about what Clary will do, and what effect that will have on Izzy.”

“Definitely. I have to say, I hope she makes the right choice. Like you said the other day, her and Jace argue so much. Her and Izzy and perfect for each other”, Magnus insisted, pulling back slightly.

Alec tensed a little bit but nodded. He didn’t want to say he agreed, for he knew the pain that would cause Jace, but he also knew that Magnus was right, at least to a certain degree.

“Can’t say I’m jealous of all their fighting”, Magnus mumbled. When Alec remained silent, Magnus raised an eyebrow at him. “Are you?”

“I guess I am”, he answered honestly, ignoring Magnus’ look of surprise. “I guess after so many years of trying to accept who I am I just wish I had that too.”

“What? The fighting?”

Alec shook his head. “Not to this degree. But then again it’s perfectly normal to fight occasionally in a relationship.”

“We don’t argue.”

“We’re barely in a _relationship_ , Mags. We haven’t been together long enough to be”, Alec said, not unkindly. The look he sent Magnus was a fond one.

Magnus remained silent, knowing Alec was right. He also didn’t want to make Alec clam up. He liked how open he was being.

“That’s why I live with Raph, you know. My parents fought, mainly because of me. In the end they sent me packing- I guess they would rather protect their relationship than their own son.”

Alec looked haunted as he cast his eyes ahead, staring without really seeing. Magnus watched him with wary eyes. “My mother killed herself when I told her and when my step-father tried to drown me to stop my ‘ _disease’_ spreading, I was sent to a foster home.”

Alec turned to Magnus in shock, his eyes wet with unshed tears and deep with sympathy. “Is that where you met Raph?”

Magnus nodded, looking down as he dished up the soup. Handing one bowl to Alec, he headed to the small dining table at the back of the RV, confident that Alec was following. They both settled opposite each other, watching the other with heavy-lidded eyes.

“It took me years to accept and love myself after that”, Magnus sighed, swirling his spoon around in the soup aimlessly.

“I’m still not sure I have yet”, Alec whispered as he avoided Magnus’ gaze.

Magnus felt his heart break a little. “And so you want a relationship full of fighting... to _what_? Improve your self-worth? Because that makes no sense.”

Alec looked down at his hands and fiddled with them nervously. “Yeah, I guess you’re right”, he mumbled half-heartedly. “I just see the way Jace looks at her and see how much he loves her and it’s…”

“You don’t need a boyfriend to improve your self-worth, Alexander.”

“I know that”, Alec insisted. “I’m just saying that the furthest I’ve gone with someone is liking them and at 24 years old it’s kinda depressing that I’ve never been in love.”

Magnus nodded in understanding. “It’s not that great”, he said quietly. Alec watched him and saw the deeply rooted sadness that lingered in his eyes. After a moment or two, the older man seemed to switch back into his happy self and he sent Alec a mirthful smile. “We can take this as slow as you’d like. So slow we’re virtually going backwards if that’s what you need.”

Alec chuckled softly. “I don’t need it _that_ slow, Magnus.”

There was a pregnant pause before Magnus spoke again. “I want to give you that”, he whispered quietly.

Alec tilted his head in confusion. “What?”

“I want to give the relationship you’ve always dreamed of; someone to look at you like Jace does with Clary.”

Alec was at a loss of words. “I want that too”, he eventually said.

Magnus smirked widely, “We’ll get there.”

The blush on Alec’s face was so deep that his chest felt on fire. He took a shuddering breath as he looked at Magnus. He smiled softly at the older man and watched as Magnus lit up in response.

It dawned on Magnus how much he adored these moments; moments when Alec was open and free of any weight on his shoulders. It was breath-taking to see the Alec that was so cleverly hidden underneath false projections of what everyone else wanted him to be.

“We still need to head to the beach at some point y’know”, Magnus teased.

To his surprise, Alec began to shuffle around the seat towards him.. Alec hesitated, his eyes undeniably fixed to Magnus’ lips, but he eventually settled for sinking into Magnus’ side, his arms wrapping around his middle as he dug his face into Magnus’ chest.  

“That we do”, Alec sighed. “We need to get you a date with old speedo guy, after all.”

Magnus’ laugh was so genuine and uncut that he felt his heart stop for a moment before he wrapped his arms around Alec and gently placed his lips against his head, letting them linger for a moment before pulling away. Alec shifted in his arms to get comfortable, his legs swung onto the long seat and his head pillowed on Magnus’ chest, his heartbeat thumping in his ear.

For a moment Magnus had the passing thought that perhaps they should move to the bed to hold each other in such a position but eventually he settled and allowed his eyes to drift shut as he tightened his arms around the man in his embrace.

 

 

 

...

 

 

 

"So, you promise that there's nothing there? That you still want to be with me?"

"When have I said any differently?"

"I'm not saying you have!" Jace groaned impatiently. "But you're pulling away. Just promise me you aren't pulling away from me to be with Izzy, because I don't know if I could handle that."

Clary shifted uncomfortably. "Why? Because it's your sister?"

Jace looked beyond tired of their conversation but instead of walking away, he simply fixed Clary with a hard face. "So are you planning to then?"

"What?"

"Be with my sister!" Jace hissed under his breath, trying desperately to be quiet as he knew Isabelle was only down the hall. 

Clary rolled her eyes but the way her heart raced undeniably in her chest made her panic slightly.

"Please, Clary", Jace said pathetically, his eyes wet and his voice hoarse with fear and sadness. He had clearly given up with any attempt he previously had of staying calm. "I can't lose you."

Clary tensed slightly. Clary was not one to lie, she loathed liars, and so she knew that whatever decision she made in this moment, she would have to live with it. Jace, a man she loved deeply, was stood in front of her with eyes wide and lip trembling in his distraught condition. Looking at the man she had been with for over 3 years, she knew that no matter what she felt for Isabelle, she could not compare it to a 3 year long happy relationship. 3 or so months of loving Izzy wouldn't replace 3 years of loving Jace. 

 _Well they don't have to_ replace  _Jace, they are simply ne-_

"Clary?"

Clary was torn from her train of thought by her boyfriend's plea. When she looked at him, she knew that he would accept whatever decision she made because that was just who Jace was. If she wanted to break up, wanted to be with someone else, he would support her and love her regardless. But his _sister?_ Clary just couldn't hurt him like that.

"I promise that I'm not leaving you for Izzy. I promise I have no feelings for her _whatsoever"_

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DUN DUN DUN.... So, what did you guys think? 
> 
> I know you hate me for that, but don't worry because more Clace/Clizzy drama will come into play next chapter (thursday's upload). 
> 
> Also, next chapter is.... THE BEACH CHAPTER. Yep! Oh, and also.. the beach thing? It's totally a two part-er! So two beach chapters are coming your way this week ;)
> 
> Comment below what you thought and if you're as excited as I am for Clizzy drama/ Malec speedo guy jokes :D
> 
> Also, check out my tumblr for a sneak peek of next chapter (it's Clizzy ma friends!)


	8. Beach Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group finally go to the beach but its not quite as fun as they imagined

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again friends! 
> 
> This chapter is pretty long but it kinda orientated around mostly Malec and Clizzy/Clace. BUT do NOT worry because the second part to the beach chapter has some more Saphael and more group dynamic/bonding time to come. 
> 
> Enjoy :)

 

* * *

 

 

Chapter 8

Over the next few days, Alec and Magnus continued to have late night conversations, despite the inconvenience of Magnus having to return to his own bed every night. Over those days, Alec had shared more with Magnus about his life than he had originally planned and Magnus had opened up to such a degree in return, that Alec felt beyond lucky; He was being able to see a side of Magnus that no one else except perhaps Cat, Raphael and Ragnor had seen. It was intoxicating and Alec found himself desperate for more every day, the night conversations only serving his addiction.

As he learnt more and more about Magnus, an entirely different person began to surface from behind the façade of confidence and arrogance. Magnus was an incredibly sensitive person in that he felt such deep emotion it shocked Alec sometimes. But with each secret he was entrusted with, each story he was told and every compliment he received, Alec found himself growing even more drawn to the man.

Alec found himself annoyed, though. Because despite wanting to get to know Magnus and simply be in his presence, his desire to feel Magnus and kiss Magnus and touch Magnus was getting out of hand. With every night in Magnus’ arms or simply sitting beside him, Alec noticed the man’s looks. Magnus would so often watch Alec- either his lips, his eyes or his ass. And while all of the attention was flattering, it also made it very hard for Alec to resist him.

God did Alec just want Magnus to have his way with him, but he never did. Alec was desperate to get to know Magnus before he progressed any further and for now, the privately exchanged pecks had to be enough.

After the terrible rain earlier that week and the resulting cold Alec had, the group had had little opportunity to really have fun. Unlike the week before when they had visited the museum (not that that ended well), they had done little this week. And so that was how Izzy’s idea sprang into action.

Just like Magnus had wanted it was agreed that with the newly appearing sun, a trip to the beach was necessary. The drove along to the west coast of Oregon, setting off on Sunday morning bright and early. They decided to head to Seaside Oregon beach and headed there early so as to secure a good few hours in the heat.

Izzy was excited, it seemed, as she had eagerly lead Alec through a selection of nearby stores in a hunt for what she deemed “fashionable” swimwear. Alec didn’t exactly care but he humoured her, knowing that in the moments she spent surrounded by clothes she would be calmer than she had been in days.

After her night with Magnus, Izzy could say with pride that she had accepted what occurred at the museum and had moved on. She had explained that at some point she would tell Jace, a decision Magnus supported, and would attempt to gain his forgiveness. They had even discussed how Isabelle was going to apologise to Clary. While Magnus had argued vehemently that she needn’t do anything of the sort, Izzy had come to the decision to properly talk to Clarissa and attempt to mend their friendship.

And yet, whenever she was given an opportunity to talk to Clary, Izzy clammed up. Perhaps it was the fact that she didn’t want to go back to such mundane friendship after the experience they had shared, or perhaps her heartbreak at being ignored for days had driven her to want to ignore Clary in return. Whatever the reason, Izzy found she struggled with the idea of just confronting the red head and demanding an explanation.

When they had agreed to head to the beach, the weather predicted in the following days a God sent after the raining they dealt with, Izzy had decided that the beach would be the perfect opportunity to talk. The boys would no doubt rush head first into the water as they always did and that separation would allow her time to talk to Clary alone. She hoped.

“What about this one?” Izzy asked, holding the pair of swimming trunks up to herself to show her brother.

Alec paled. The material was designed to look like leather and the scrap of fabric this store called a bathing suit was guaranteed to barely cover his ass. He shook his head immediately and Izzy, though she had expected that response, simply laughed and put it back.

“Something that’s actually going to cover e _verything,_ Iz”, Alec reminded her once again. Izzy giggled, waving for him to follow her as she barrelled further into the store.

Eventually, after parading through two more shops, they settled on a comfortable pair of black and white trunks, long enough to cover everything necessary but short enough to please Izzy.

When they returned to the RV Magnus perked up at seeing the shopping bags and immediately came to Alec’s side.

“Well, well, well”, he said quietly, aware of the group mingling around them. “What’s in there, Alexander?”

Alec bit his lip, smiling. He cast a watchful eye to the others before opening the back to show Magnus the bathing suit inside.

Magnus grinned. “So… I get to see you in a bathing suit?”

Alec rolled his eyes. “I get to see you in one too, idiot.”

“I know!” Magnus cackled. “I’ve just yet to see your chest… I’m excited.”

The younger of the two simply shook his head in exasperation and headed inside to change, passing Jace, who was dressed and bouncing on his feet in excitement.

They had parked just across from the beach in a parking lot opposite and most of the group were more than prepared to go. Jace, leading the group in enthusiasm had packed his bag the night before and hurriedly awoken that morning to ensure everyone was awake before 8. Alec, though excited, was far calmer than his adoptive brother.

Izzy watched as Jace, Raphael and Simon all began to excitedly converse about the beach. Most of the group, save Alec, were standing outside of the RVs with their bags, more than ready to head off. Isabelle primarily was excited as it gave her an opportunity to tan but thoughts of Clary plagued her mind.

“You okay, buttercup?” Magnus asked kindly, appearing beside her.

Izzy turned to him in surprise, letting out a little gasp. Magnus grinned at her reaction but his eyes were weary and worried.

“Yeah, I’m fine.”

Magnus looked at her with eyes that clearly showed he didn’t believe her.

Izzy sighed. “Fine, I’m a little nervous okay? I’m going to talk to Clary today.”

“Ah I see. What are you going to say?”

“Not a clue”, Izzy said sadly. “What if she never wants to talk to me again?”

Magnus rolled his eyes but his smile showed understanding and support. “You and I both know that Clary would never want that. Whatever happens, I’ll be around if you need me, okay?”

“Okay”, Izzy relented before she leaned up to peck Magnus’ cheek.

“That’s our thing”, a voice called from the RV doorway. Alec, dressed in his bathing suit with a towel in hand approached the pair and very deliberately pecked Magnus’ cheek. He ignored Izzy’s squeal at the gesture, after all the small peck was bound to excite since she didn’t know they were “together” yet.

“We’re just playing, Iz”, Alec insisted. Izzy simply laughed, patting her brother on the arm before moving away.

“Oh my god”, Alec heard Magnus mumble. When he turned to his boyfriend (boyfriend?), he saw the look in his eye.

Magnus’ eyes were locked firmly on Alec’s chest and his mouth was ajar with shock.

Alec chuckled quietly before patting Magnus’ arm in a similar fashion to Izzy.

“Close your mouth babe.”

Magnus watched in complete shock as Alec sauntered away towards the beach with the others, hips swaying with the slightest amount of emphasis.

 

 

…

 

 

They were quick to get to the beach after the others realised that Alec was finally ready. With bags in hand and, thanks to Jace, a variety of beach balls bouncing between them, they settled comfortably onto a large spot in the sand.

It was busy, but not so populated that it was hard to find space. There was still a decent amount of privacy to be had as the population of the beach was relatively spread out.

Wasting no time at all, Jace threw his towel onto the sand and tore off towards the water, feet flicking back sand. The group screamed as they shielded their eyes but Jace only laughed in response, gleeful as he was. Simon was quick to follow and not long after Raphael and Ragnor slowly approached the sea too.

Magnus set out his towel beside Alec’s and ignored Alec’s playful look when he deliberately laid them one partially across the other, to form one large beach towel. Alec shook his head fondly when Magnus squeezed in beside him and gently nudged his shoulder teasingly. Alec laid back beside Magnus, leaning against his arms and hanging his head back to bathe in the sunlight. Magnus did his best not to stare at the adorable look of complete peace on Alec’s face.

Alec opened his eyes and looked up at Magnus with soft eyes. More and more frequently, Magnus was treated to the sight of Alec’s eyes, full of fondness and affection.

 “So Magnus”, Cat called from across the beach slightly. She was seated on the far end of their group, rummaging through a bag. When she pulled out sunscreen she tossed it in Magnus’ direction, who caught it with the graceful ease of a dancer. “Come do my back”, she shouted, a hint of teasing in her voice.

Alec grinned at Magnus as he rose to join Cat. Magnus looked down quickly and winked before heading over to his best friend.

As he walked past the other towels reserved for the boys, he noticed Isabelle lounging happily in the sunlight and Clary watching her closely. When he was close enough to her, Magnus knelt down beside Clary quickly, gaining her attention. “Talk to her”, he said simply, and joined Cat before Clary could say another word.

Clary watched Isabelle with both admiration and distress. The goddess spread in front of her was a one Clary had been lucky to kiss but one she had ignored for days. Clary knew deep down that she was the one at fault; she had initiated the kiss when in a relationship. _She_ had cheated, not Izzy.

Clary froze.

She had cheated.

 _Oh God_.

Glancing around her quickly, as though someone might have heard her thoughts, Clary felt herself begin to panic. It hadn’t hit her yet, even in the moments where she had awkwardly returned Jace’s kisses, responded half-heartedly to his advances. She had pictured different lips every time.

Oh God!

 

 

….

 

 

“Um… Izzy?”

Izzy’s eyes fluttered open slowly, wincing at the onslaught of sunlight that met her. She let her eyes adjust for a moment before she began to make out who was standing above her.

Clary, swinging her hands nervously in front of her, hovered beside her, looking down with desperate eyes. Izzy immediately sat up.

“Clary”, Izzy responded. She didn’t mean for it to sound as hostile as it did.

From the look on Clary’s face she had hardly noticed the sharp tone. Her eyes were firmly locked on the sand between her toes as she spoke. “Can we… I don’t know, talk?”

Izzy hid her surprise well; the last thing she had expected had been for Clary to approach _her._

“Oh, sure.”

When Izzy didn’t make a move to stand, Clary nervously offered a hand. Isabelle, not wanting to start the conversation off on the wrong foot, accepted the help. Ignoring her racing thoughts and the ever inviting feel of Clary’s skin against hers, Izzy allowed herself to be pulled to her feet. They immediately dropped each other’s hands and Izzy led the way to the closest ice cream stand situated not too far away, sitting herself down at the first empty table she saw.

Clary joined her.

“Okay”, Izzy said after a moment of two of awkward silence. “Talk.”

Clary looked unprepared, but the determination in her eyes was evident. Izzy was pleasantly surprised to know that Clary was truly making an effort.

“First of all, I’m sorry. For ignoring you, for acting like nothing happened, for completely pushing away the problem, everything”, she mumbled hastily. “I’m sorry.”

Izzy nodded, refusing to let the relief creep onto her face. When Clary looked confused as to where to go next, Izzy decided to help her out. “Why did you kiss me?”

Clary flushed and looked away quickly. Fiddling with her dainty artists’ hands nervously, she pointedly avoided the younger woman’s gaze. Eventually, she took a deep breath and raised her eyes to meet Izzy’s. Izzy’s heart skipped a beat when she saw the tears in Clary’s eyes.

Clary’s lip wobbled pathetically as she spoke. “I shouldn’t have done that”, she said timidly. “I would never do that to Jace. I mean, I didn’t ever want to do something like that to someone like him.”

Izzy attempted desperately to ignore the despair she felt for her older brother in that moment. The guilt crashed against her, almost overwhelming her. The only thing that kept her afloat was Magnus’ voice in her head saying over and over again, _It’s not your fault._

“Jace and I haven’t been in good shape ever since I… since before we left for the trip.” Izzy watched as Clary swallowed deeply to regain some composure. “I told him I was bisexual”, she said quickly, desperate to get it out. At Isabelle’s look of surprise, Clary stuttered anxiously. “B-before the trip. I told him I was bisex- bisexual.”

Izzy watched the redhead with concern. She herself had dealt with sharing such a thing with Jace and while her brother was supportive, he always seemed to lack to mental capability to understand the idea of liking both genders. Even Alec was a little ignorant in that respect but he certainly attempted to understand more than the blond Lightwood. That was not to say that Jace was rude or cruel, but sometimes things were said that Isabelle knew were only jokes, but that were insulting never the less. Looking at the girl in front of her, she could completely understand the despair and fear she was feeling.

“He didn’t take it well; started getting upset and accusing me of wanting to be with someone else. He assumed that with more potential lovers there was suddenly more temptation on my side, which just isn’t true. Anyway, we fought, as you can imagine. I’m ashamed to say that I said some things to insult him, just as he did to me. It was a nightmare.”

The look in Clary’s eyes was one of reminiscence and pain. Izzy reached across the table and delicately grasped her hand and gave her an encouraging squeeze. The look they shared in that moment was captivating and full of so much complex emotion that it hurt her head to attempt to understand it all.

Clary slowly looked away in order to continue, now without the distraction of Izzy’s eyes. “After time I started to notice I was doing exactly what he accused me of.”

“What?” Izzy said, after a moment of silence. Clary didn’t answer immediately but the look in her eyes was one of shame.

“I realised that I _was_ being more tempted. Telling him, opening up about it, made me realise that I was tempted by someone I shouldn’t be and I let myself, for just a moment, bask in it. I thought about it, y’know? Really being with that person- I wanted that person. I still do.” Her voice grew more and more strained from holding back her tears.

Izzy sighed and ran a hand through her hair. “You can’t help who you’re attracted to, Clare.”

Clary felt her heart race at the nickname; it was one frequently used by Izzy before their more recent problems and hearing its return sent a wave of comfort through her rigid body and forced her to relax.

“But I’m with Jace. I love Jace. I just- I mean…”

“If you were truly happy with Jace, Clary, then you wouldn’t be looking at someone else”, Izzy said softly.

Clary nodded solemnly. “Oh I know. But just because I’m not entirely happy doesn’t mean I don’t still love him, y’know?”

“Do you?”

 

….

 

 

Alec and Magnus were lounging peacefully under the rays of the sun. With only Cat close by, they were able to face each other with little worried of being questioned. While Magnus had decided to close his eyes in peace, Alec simply watched the man.

Magnus was so beautiful. In moments like this, when Alec was reminded of just how attractive Magnus was, he was reminded of how lucky he was to have this man to himself. Watching him and the peaceful rise and fall of his chest, Alec remembered waking up in Magnus’ bed a few days ago and remembered the sense of tranquillity and contentment that he felt in those moments, wrapped in his older man’s arms.

It was in times like this that Alec truly let himself feel everything for Magnus. He let himself feel all of his apprehension, his fear, his doubt and his worry, but he also allowed himself to feel his attraction, his affection, his devotion and his appreciation for the man in front of him.

Alec felt the return of the squeezing in his chest as he watched Magnus lie there peacefully. That feeling was closely followed by fear. Looking upon this man, Alec knew that the feelings he was slowly developing for Magnus were real, they were there and they were s _trong._ And while that came with a little fear, Alec attempted to ignore it, knowing that both men wanted each other, needed each other, and were willing to take it at whatever a pace they so desired.

Slowly, Magnus opened his eyes and turned to look at Alec. Careful not to move too deliberately, Magnus subtly reached across the space between them to glide his fingertips across Alec’s hand, feeling the hairs of his skin prickle in response. Alec suppressed a shiver when Magnus slowly rose his hand to stroke lightly over the bone of his cheek.

“God, I wanna kiss you right now”, Magnus groaned quietly, well aware of Catarina sitting not too far away.

Alec felt his body respond rather positively to the words. “I want you to do more than kiss me”, he whispered.

Magnus stared at him with firm, dark eyes. Alec, despite his own surprise at his words, refused to take them back, and let his eyes drift across Magnus’ face.

Magnus hummed appreciatively, “Me too”, he said, so quietly that Alec almost didn’t hear him.

Alec was looking Magnus over when something caught his eye behind him.

“Look to your left”, Alec whispered suddenly, sitting up slightly.

With the moment broken, Magnus did so. He was slightly panicked and turned quickly and when he did he found…. Nothing. From his position in the sand all he could see to his right were several “families”; one family consisting of all younger people, another of middle-aged women and another of parents, children and what appeared to be their grandfath-

Magnus let his eyes linger on the older man and when he saw it, he collapsed to the ground in peals of laughter.

From beside him, Alec was laughing too and was making a desperate attempt to turn Magnus round while he bent over in tears. Magnus allowed himself to be turned over, his laughter resonating across the entire beach as he met Alec’s eyes.

Alec’s face was red from laughing, his eyes wet with tears and his hand covering his mouth to desperately mask his laughter.

“I hate you so much!” Magnus cackled as he attempted to calm himself down, taking deep breathes. Alec beamed at him as his laughter quietened down.

“I think we found your beach hottie”, he teased, voice higher pitched than normal. Magnus rolled his eyes and shoved Alec onto his back.

Weary of Cat watching them with amused expressions, Magnus didn’t kiss the smile off of Alexander’s face like he so urgently wanted to. He simply swatted at Alec, laughing when the younger man rose his hands to protect himself.

Alec squealed as Magnus hit him and felt his cheeks begin to ache from his laughter.

“Magnus, stop! Mag-Magnus!” He cried as the older man began to tickle his sides.

Magnus relented but glared playfully at Alec all the same. “Now we only have to find you a hottie”, Magnus grinned, mischief in his eyes.

Quickly, Magnus sprung to his feet. Alec startled and, letting out a cry of “No”, desperately clawed at Magnus’ feet to stop him.

Magnus jumped away from his hands and took off towards the further end of the beach. Alec, screaming after him, hastily getting to his feed and speeding after Magnus, ignoring Cat’s cheers as he did so.

 

 

….

 

 

“Do you?”

Clary was silent.

Izzy looked deeply into Clary’s eyes for a moment. Clary felt on edge, uncomfortable at being stared at, but allowed it to happen. Izzy lent forward with a sigh and let her head fall into her palm. Leaning against her arm, Izzy fixed her with a firm but kind look. “Do you still love Jace?”

Clary appeared confused for a moment but after a second she nodded slowly. “Yes I do.”

“Are you still _in love_ with Jace?”

At Isabelle’s words, Clary froze. She had spent the last few weeks desperately reminding herself that she loved her boyfriend, that he was the one that she wanted to be with. She had, at no point in time, asked herself that question and she found herself unable to answer it. She knew that, deep down, the answer was there, but it was buried beneath denial and regret. Not to mention shame.

It had been a long time since Clary had looked upon Jace and felt the rush of heat that she felt when they first got together. She had let it slide, assuming that over time those feelings weren’t supposed to remain- she would grow used to him after all. But thinking it over, looking back on every argument, every fight and every declaration of love across the past few months, Clary noticed a pattern. As time went by, she found herself looking at Jace with different eyes. They were eyes of fondness.

Fondness, but not love.

“No”, she eventually whispered, her voice hoarse almost as though if she didn’t hear it, then it wasn’t true.

Izzy looked at one of her closest friends of many years with eyes of sympathy. She watched as every emotion flickered across the redhead’s face as she tried vehemently to understand her emotions. She spared a though for her brother, a man still so helpless in love with the girl sitting in front of her, and felt her heart shatter for him. He didn’t deserve this.

But then again, neither did Clary.

“It’s not your fault”, Izzy said, repeating the mantra rolling in her head. She grabbed Clary’s hand once more. “These things just happen. You can’t help who you love.”

Clary nodded. “I know”, she whimpered. “But Jace is so good. He doesn’t deserve this. I don’t deserve him”, she cried. Izzy watched as Clary’s head fell to her free hand, shoulders shaking with her sobs. The grip she still had on Izzy’s hand tightened.

For every tear of guilt and shame that Clary cried, Izzy cried one of sympathy and pity.

Izzy gave her a moment, and took the time to look across the beach. They were a couple of hundred yards away from the group, Clary’s back to their friends. The boys appeared to have  returned and Jace, obviously last to come out of the water, was just approaching. Izzy saw him look around in confusion for a moment before turning to Catarina and asking something. For a moment, Cat shrugged and looked as though she was laughing but eventually she calmed down and whatever she said next made Jace tense visibly.

Seconds later, their eyes met.

Jace watched Izzy and Izzy watched Jace.

The look on her face must have said something for Jace’s eyes fell to the copper haired girl crying into her hands opposite Izzy.

Slowly, his eyes fell to their clasped hands and the shaking of Clary’s shoulders. Izzy watched in despair as her brother’s mouth fell open and his face contorted in, first, realization and second, something far to similar to agony. She watched as the youngest Lightwood brother looked between the pair with knowing eyes.

To save herself the heartbreak, Izzy pretended not to see the tear slip down her brother’s cheek.

Something in Jace’s eyes as he met Izzy’s showed both acceptance and heartbreak. His eyes bore into his sister’s and despite the feeling of knives in her heart, Izzy smiled ever so gently. Jace’s lips visibly trembled and from the way his shoulder’s shifted, he appeared to take a raged breath. Slowly, he nodded.

Casting her eyes away as she felt herself tear up, Izzy met Clary’s gaze. The redhead watched her with curious confusion before following Isabelle’s earlier line of sight. When she turned to face Jace, Clary’s entire body tensed, muscles locking.

Her boyfriend very rarely cried and was never the one to be pessimistic. Jace was an excitable, light-hearted person through and through. Now though, his shoulders were slouched with the weight of his despair.

Clary knew in that moment that Jace had put the pieces together. He had finally worked it out; Clary no longer loved him.

Almost as though he heard her thoughts, Jace abruptly turned away and, ignoring his friends as they called after him, sprinted across the beach and deep into the crowds of the streets.

Clary let out a sob as she watched her boyfriend slowly disappear from sight and she closed her eyes tightly. She so desperately needed this to be a dream, a horrible, horrible dream.

“Clary?” she heard Isabelle ask, her voice uneven and thick with emotion.

Clary didn’t turn to look at her, nor did she voice that she had heard, but Izzy knew she was listening.

“Why did you kiss me?”

Izzy watched as Clary ever so slowly turned back around in her seat, her eyes locked on Izzy’s. Clary’s entire face had lost his colour, lost its life in a sense. Her eyes, hollow and empty, looked deep into Izzy’s.

Izzy felt her breath catch when Clary smiled sadly at her and that was all the answer Izzy needed.

“Oh, Clary-” Izzy began, but she was interrupted by Clarissa clambering clumsily to her feet.

“I can’t… I can’t do this right now”, Clary said suddenly, her voice broken. She ran her hands through her hair violently as she looked between Izzy and the ongoing beach. Without another word, she quickly hurried away from Izzy, her cries falling from her lips just as frequently as her tears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, Jace knows about Clizzy.... well shit! And of course Izzy knows about Clary's feelings for her. Gotta say, I feel bad for Clary.
> 
> However, do not fret because next chapter, which is up on Saturday, we have group bonding, Saphael, and some Clace talking... (I think they need to talk... what with this chapter n' all ;)
> 
> REALLY hope you liked it, let me know what you thought below!
> 
> Until Saturday...


	9. Beach part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Izzy and Clary must face the consequences of their guilt, while Jace attempts to come to terms with what has happened. Meanwhile, Magnus and Alec remain unaware.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! 
> 
> Once again, I'm British so I'm sorry if sometimes some words alternate between the English and America spelling :l (Also, I have no beta so I'm sorry for any mistakes!)
> 
> I'm a little bit iffy with the chapter and technically wasn't going to upload it because I'm not entirely happy with it but I'm hoping that this not-so-good chapter will tie up this major Clizzy role (to a certain degree, dont worry!) so that next chapter can focus back on Malec's development again. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy :)
> 
> WARNING: explicit language and slurs are featured in this chapter

 

* * *

 

 

Chapter 9

“What about that guy?”

“Nah, too burly.”

“That one over there? By the sandcastle?”

“I’m loving the grey hair thing he’s got going on but not so much the tan skin; looks too-”

“-leathery?”

Magnus shot Alec a look but as he turned back away when he couldn’t stop the smile on his face. “Yes, Alexander, leathery.”

Alec chuckled lightly as they continued to walk along the beach front, hand in hand. They were far enough away from the group to be at no risk whatsoever of being seen and Alec was grateful, as he very much enjoyed spending time like this with Magnus.

Magnus seemed to find something of interest as he sped up slightly, tightening his hand around Alec’s and towing him towards a small wooden shack. Alec grunted in disapproval at being pulled along but humoured Magnus anyway.

“What is it?”

Magnus turned to him and grinned but he didn’t slow down. “Bucket and spade, we need a bucket and spade.”

Alec stared at Magnus in surprise and despite the amusement he felt, pulled Magnus to a stop. “Oh no, nuh-uh.”

“Alec!” Magnus whined. “You said we’d make a sandcastle! So we’re going to do it.”

“I thought you were joking!”

Magnus glared. “I’m never joking! Now, I refuse to let you give up. I will just keep bugging you about it until I am satisfied.”

Alec, seeing his chance, smirked at Magnus and slowly began to pull his boyfriend away from the shack. “I can satisfy you more than any sandcastle”, he said teasingly, cringing inwardly at hearing his poor attempt at seducing his… Magnus.

Magnus grinned at him but the knowing look in his eye informed Alec that he had failed in his attempt at a distraction. “Nice try baby. We can get to that after the sandcastle!”

Alec rolled his eyes but no longer put up a fight as his boyfriend pulled him towards the buckets and spades.

 

 

…

 

Simon moaned, letting his head fall back against the brick wall behind him as he felt the continuous nipping at his neck. Raphael, kissing and biting along the expanses of his boyfriend’s skin, made an approving sound as he continued to bury his face into Simon’s collar.

“Isn’t it a bit weird just leaving the others on their own? All the couples have just mysteriously left”, Simon said around his deep breaths.

Raphael pulled away and the look he gave Simon was almost deadly. “First of all, Clary and Jace didn’t leave together, second of all I’m sure 3 adults can survive on their own for 5 minutes, and thirdly, Alec and Magnus can hardly be considered a couple.”

Simon raised an eyebrow but it went unnoticed as Raphael dove back into his neck.

“They totally are”, he mumbled jokingly and ignored the grunt of annoyance he heard from his boyfriend- he heard it a lot.

Finally relenting, Simon pulled back slightly to look at Raphael and _Dios_ , he was he a picture; swollen lips, tousled hair, blown pupils. Simon made the quick decision to throw caution to the wind and began to eagerly tug his boyfriend away.

“C’mon”, he whispered as he tugged Raphael across the beach and towards the RV, attempting to very stealthily avoid the rest of the group’s line of sight. Raphael chuckled darkly and seemed more than pleased to get away from the others.

“Just to put it out there”, he began as Simon hurried him across the road. “They really aren’t in a relationship; Alec’s my best friend and Magnus is my… ex best friend. They would have told me.”

Simon nodded absentmindedly, steering his boyfriend towards their RV. “Sure, sure”, he said, unconvinced.

Raphael growled but said no more on the matter.

When they finally reached the RV, Simon turned back to his boyfriend and pulled him in close. Raphael wasted no time in pressing the brunet up against the RV and kissing him like he was starved of his touch. Simon responded in kind.

After and moment or two of kissing, Simon reached behind him and began to grope around the RV to find the door handle. When he did, he let out a small cheer of victory and made to open the door. It didn’t budge.

Both men pulled away from the kiss simultaneously. Simon tried the door again, desperately, but it refused to open. Grunting in frustration, Simon gave up.

“Magnus has the key.”

Raphael and Simon both turned, startled at the noise. They looked to the right and for the first time they caught sight of the man sitting slumped against the wheel of the RV.

Jace looked like a mess; his hair was more dishevelled than usual, his eyes were wet and an angry red, and his skin itself looked sort of… sunken. Simon winced in sympathy.

Raphael, however, was never one for sympathy. “So, you gonna tell us why you ran off crying like a baby?”

Simon attempted to hit his boyfriend but Raphael had already moved away and towards Jace. The blond in question glared at Raphael before letting his head fall into his hands.

Raphael sat beside Jace and patted his shoulder slightly. Jace slowly raised his head in response and looked down at his hands as he fiddled with them nervously.

“I was right”, he finally said, looking directly at Simon.

Raphael looked up at his boyfriend in question but Simon just shrugged. “About what?” Raphael asked gently, too gently considering who it was.

Jace acknowledged him but kept his eyes on Simon. “Clary does like Izzy.”

Simon looked taken aback but Raphael simply winced in sympathy for both Jace and for Izzy; he’d known her long enough to know she was probably a mess right now.

“How do you know?”

“I just do”, Jace said, shrugging. “Just… trust me on this.”

Raphael watched as Simon sat himself down on the other side of Jace and nervously dropped his hand to Jace’s, giving them a squeeze. Instead of pulling away or insulting him in return, Jace just smiled awkwardly, as though smiling at Simon was physically hurting him.

“How are you?” Simon finally asked.

Jace raised an eyebrow at him. “How do I look?”

Simon resisted the urge to look the blond over again, knowing it was a rhetorical question.

“How are you feeling about it?” Raphael asked softly.

Simon was reminded once again of my he loved Raphael in that moment; he was a heartless bitch almost all the time, but when the time came to be loving and there for someone, he always was. Alec could vouch for him on that.

“I don’t know, to be honest.” Jace looked lifeless at his admission. “I guess I knew all along so I feel almost relieved.”

“Relieved?”

“Yeah”, Jace sighed. “Relieved that I’m not having to look over my shoulder and wait for it anymore, y’know? But, besides that… it hurts, man. It fucking hurts.”

Simon nodded and looked at Jace with eyes full of sympathy and pity. He was glad Jace didn’t look up for he knew that Jace would get a kick out of punching the pity off of his face.

“It’s going to”, Simon said softly, not wanting to jolt Jace from the somewhat peaceful silence.

Jace nodded. “Yeah.”

Raphael and Simon shared a brief look and decided to give him a moment. Simon settled for rubbing his shoulder in a sympathetic, understanding gesture for a moment and Raphael let his head fall back against the RV as he looked up at the startlingly bright sky above them.

It was around 4 o’clock now and the group had been there several hours. Clary was still missing, as were Alec and Magnus, but the rest of the group had settled back in the sand and had begun to prepare a barbecue.

“Look man, we’re heading to the store to get some food for dinner so why don’t you come back?” Simon asked after a moment or two of silence.

Jace frowned. “Is Clary there?”

“She hasn’t come back yet.”

“Come back?”

Raphael gave Jace a look. “She left?” At Jace’s look of confusion, Raphael shook his head in exasperation. “She took off towards the dock, crying, not long after you. _Dios_ , you’re incompetent.”

Jace ignored the insult and rose to his feet slowly. “Thanks guys. I’ll meet you back there in a little while.”

Simon looked at Raphael in alarm and confusion as Jace started to walk in the opposite direction of the beach. “Where are you going?!” he shouted to Jace’s retreating figure.

“To find Clary!”

 

 

…

 

 

“If that little bugger stands on it…” Magnus said threateningly, watching the young boy stumble towards their sandcastle with very little regard for what was around him.

Alec watched the boy with a fond smile; he was reminded of his younger brother Max, who was certainly no longer a toddler but who Alec had seen as one.

“Stop threatening children, Mags”, Alec said absentmindedly.

Magnus looked over to Alec and from beneath his sunglasses he frowned. Alec, knowing he was being watched, looked across at Magnus and smiled slightly. Magnus immediately returned the gesture.

“I’m allowed to threaten anyone who endangers my sandcastle.”

“ _Our_ sandcastle, you mean?”

Magnus rolled his eyes. “Fine. Our sandcastle.”

Alec sighed contently and let himself relax into the sand he laid on, ignoring the slight scratching of the sand as it ran between his toes. Magnus was lying beside him and the pair had spent most of their time, besides building the sandcastle, watching the families around them. As the time passed more and more people began to leave and head home however Alec was grateful for the dispersing crowd, for the beach slowly grew more and more peaceful with each departure.

“We should probably head back soon. They’ll all be wondering what we’ve been doing alone for several hours”, Magnus said solemnly.

Alec nodded reluctantly. The hours spent lounging with Magnus, laughing and flirting, were hours Alec enjoyed and he didn’t particularly want it to end.

“Yeah, we should.”

Magnus, obviously sensing the averseness in Alec’s tone, turned over to face the younger man. Alec turned his head to watch as Magnus shuffled towards him slowly.

After a moment or two, Magnus was hovering above Alec with a smile on his face. Alec found himself lost in Magnus’ eyes and unable to smile back.

“We’ll go back… after I do this.”

And with that, Magnus pressed himself against Alec and captured his lips in a kiss. For all of the time they had spent alone throughout the day, they had not exchanged a kiss. Perhaps it was for fear of any of the others catching them, or even Alec’s aversion to PDA, but now, with the beach slowly becoming deserted, Alec found he didn’t care.

Allowing Magnus to gently hold his wrists, Alec gasped against the older man’s lips when he felt his arms sink into the sand above his head. Magnus held Alec’s hands above his head, taking the opportunity to kiss across Alec’s neck.

Alec moaned in surprise at Magnus’ boldness and tipped his head to the side in surrender.

For a moment, Alec allowed Magnus to kiss and lick across his neck with animalistic fervour but eventually he turned his head and caught Magnus’ lips in one more kiss.

Finally, Magnus pulled away. He looked down at Alec with one of most hungry but simultaneously adorable looks that Alec had ever seen. Quickly, Magnus pecked his nose before rolling away and rising to his feet.

Alec remained still for a moment in order to compose himself before accepting the hand Magnus gave him and allowing himself to get pulled to his feet.

The pair began their trek back to their friend’s when they heard a voice that made Alec freeze and Magnus grit his teeth.

Slowly, Magnus released Alec’s hand and turned back to the voice with eyes aflame with anger and teeth bared in hatred.

“What the _fuck_ did you just call us?”

The man opposite Magnus was of a lanky build and his height accurately reflected how big of an asshole he was. He was tall, around Magnus’ own height, and his hair was windswept from the ocean air. His eyes were crinkled as he curled his lips in disgust.

“Oh you lost your hearing, fag?”

Magnus felt Alec tense at his side and gritted his teeth; Alec had been so carefree and comfortable all day but obviously some asshole had to come along and ruin it.

“No I haven’t lost my hearing actually, I’m perfectly aware of how you just disrespected me and my boyfriend”, Magnus begun, voice breaking with anger.

Alec quickly turned and grabbed at Magnus’ arm gently. “Just leave it Mags. Let’s go.”

Magnus, despite the sympathy he felt for Alec, shook his head. The look he sent the man in front of him could kill.

“Go home fags. No one wants to see that filth.”

Magnus let out a humourless laugh and grinned at the blonde man across from him. “Y’know”, he said, overly sweetly. “I may like dick, but you’re the wrong kind.”

Alec fingers tightened around Magnus’ arm as he snorted quietly behind his lips. The man in front of them glared.

“What the fuck does that mean? Are you calling me a dick?” Alec watched as the man’s eyes lit up with rage.

“Well, you are what you eat.”

Alec turned to Magnus in shock. Magnus grinned wildly as he watched the imbecile in front of him attempt to make sense of his words. When he did, he raised his fist and growled threateningly.

“Watch your mouth, homo.”

“What is your problem?” Alec growled, finally refusing to sit back and watch his boyfriend defend them.

The man turned to him and grimaced at the mere sight of him. “You’re a fag!”

“And? What’s wrong with that?”

“It’s Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve, fag!”

Magnus groaned as he flung his head back exaggeratedly. “Yeah, and its Homosapien not Heterosapien, asshole!”

When Magnus saw the man’s obvious confusion he chuckled under his breath and, grabbing Alec’s hand, led them away.

As they grew further and further away from him, Alec slowly allowed his surprise to show. “You were really good back there”, he said nervously.

Magnus ignored how his blood boiled and simply nodded. “I’ve dealt with a lot of assholes like that.”

Despite Alec’s look of confusion, Magnus said no more and simply continued to lead Alec away.

 

 

…

 

 

When Jace found her, she was sitting on the steps of a closed bank, head in her hands. She was no longer crying- that much was clear. Approaching slowly, Jace tried to think of what to say.

Clary looked up, startled, when Jace sat down beside her. When she saw who it was, she whimpered almost silently and turned to look at the beach in front of them. Jace did the same.

For a few moments, the pair looked out across at the sand around them and took the time to appreciate the other’s presence. Jace, despite the sinking of his heart, still felt himself relax around the redhead.

“Jace, I am so sorry”, Clary whispered dejectedly after a moment.

Jace simply nodded. “I know.”

Clary finally looked at him and shook her head. “But you don’t”, she insisted. “You don’t know everything.”

Still looking out at the water, not an emotion on his face, Jace spoke. “I know you kissed her, Clary.”

Clary’s heart stopped and to save herself the pain of seeing his face as he turned to her, she looked down at her hands as she began to fiddle with the nervously.

“Jace-”

“It’s okay, Clary. Well, it’s not _okay_ \- you did still cheat on me. But, I’m not angry with you.” At Clary’s look of surprise, Jace sighed. “I should be because what you did was wrong, but I’m not. Heartbroken, but not angry.”

Clary shook her head in denial. “I never wanted to break your heart.”

“I know”, Jace exhaled. “You’ve kept it safe for over 4 years. Maybe it’s just time for me to look after it for a while.”

Clary winced at his words and felt her throat constrict. “I do love you Jace.”

Jace nodded, smiling sadly. “I love you too. But not in the same way… and that’s okay.”

“It’s not okay, Jace”, Clary insisted.

Jace sighed tiredly. “Well I’m saying that it is. The last thing I would ever want is you forcing yourself to be with me.”

“I wasn’t forci-”

“Yes, you were”, Jace said firmly. He left no room for argument. He looked over at Clary and watched as a tear slipped down her cheek. Out of habit, he wiped it away gently.

Clary looked up at him in surprise and the way her eyes softened when they met his broke his heart just a little more.

He knew he couldn’t bear to hear the answer, but he couldn’t stop himself from asking.

“Do you love her?”

Clary tensed under his gaze but, knowing that she owed it to him, told him the truth. “I think so”, she said quietly.

Jace nodded, pulling his head back into his lap and looking away once more in a futile attempt to keep his pain inside. “I won’t lie and say that I’m okay with all of this, Clary. In fact, I’m so _not_ okay with this… but, I never could deny you anything”, he said sadly, wistful look on his face.

Clary laughed painfully as she cried. “I know.”

Jace looked at the girl he had loved for over 4 years and smiled softly. “I need time”, he said, his voice breaking with emotion. “If you could just-”

“-Of course”, Clary said quickly. “I don’t even know if we’ll ever-”

“- I don’t need to hear it, thanks.” Jace looked down at his hands and began to bite his lower lip.

Clary shifted uncomfortably. “Oh, yeah, sorry.”

The silence between them lasted a minute or two before Jace broke it.

“I was expecting this, y’know. Not that it makes this any easier.”

“Expecting it?”

Jace looked at Clary with wide, tear-filled eyes. “C’mon, Clary. We haven’t been right with each other for weeks. I was waiting for all of it to fall apart.”

Clary looked at him in both shock and a little bit of disgust. “You were waiting for our relationship to fail?”

“No!” Jace insisted sternly. “I would never do that. But I did know it was only a matter of time before our time together ran out- you and I both know we’re just not made for each other Clary, we never were.”

“So all of those years? They were a lie to you?”

“Not a lie, never a lie. They were real, my feelings were real, my words were real. But don’t deny that you knew that despite how much we loved each other, we just weren’t each other’s forever.”

Clary closed her eyes against the emotional pain she felt in that moment. “I loved you so much” she cried, gasping around her tears.

Jace watched her and felt his own eyes soak his unshed tears. He shuffled towards her and wrapped his arm around her shoulder. “And it’s okay that you don’t anymore, Clary.”

Clary shook her head vigorously. “But I do. I love you, I do.”

Jace winced. “I love you too Clary.”

Ignoring the way his heart tore in two, Jace continued to hold Clarissa tightly in his arms. The way his skin tingled and burned at her contact was reminiscent of the past and made his heart physically hurt. However, despite the aching in his chest Jace did not move; he had promised to protect her all those years ago and even now he would not break that promise. Even if it tore him apart in the meantime.

 

 

…

 

 

“Where the hell were you?” Izzy cried, her head smothered in Alec’s shoulder.

“It’s okay, Iz. It’s gonna be okay.”

“I needed you here”, she whimpered.

Alec grit his teeth at her words and held his baby sister closer to him.

“I’m so sorry, Iz, but I’m here. I’m here.”

 

 

…

 

 

“You seem happy with him”, Izzy said softly.

They had been sitting in the sand, Izzy snuggled up to her older brother, for about 15 minutes. Despite the movement and conversation from the rest of the group, the Lightwood siblings had sat in peaceful silence the entire time while Izzy took her time to calm down.

Alec sighed, pressing a kiss against her hair. “We’re just friends, Iz.” 

Izzy giggled sarcastically. “I’m your sister”, she sighed. “It’s okay, big bro. I won’t say anything.”

Alec resisted the urge to roll his eyes and simply pulled her closer into his side. After a moment of silence he whispered into her hair, “I am happy.”

Izzy pulled away to look up at him with a gleeful smile. “I’m glad you’re happy, big brother.”

Alec nodded sadly. “I know you are. And I’m not glad you’re upset.”

The youngest Lightwood waved her hand dismissively, as though she hadn’t been sobbing into his arms just half an hour prior. “I’m okay now. It’s hard but I’ll be okay.”

“I know you will”, Alec said softly. It was still surprising to see how much his baby sister had grown over the years, despite the fact that he had watched her grow every day. “I’m so proud of you Iz.”

Izzy grinned into his chest and tightened her arms around him. “I love you.”

“I love you more.”

 

 

…

 

 

It took around another hour before the group were finally ready to begin cooking the barbecue. It was closer to 7 than it was 6, when Jace and Clary finally returned.

The air of the camp, formerly light-hearted and friendly, became tense and nervous.

Clary looked away nervously at the attention, scurrying over to Simon, whereas Jace seemed to bask in it. He grinned widely but Alec knew that the entire group would be able to tell how unauthentic it was. He was sure even Jace knew how fake his happiness appeared.

Magnus watched as the blond Lightwood approached his siblings. Having been involved in the entire situation and having seen Isabelle in tears just an hour earlier, he tensed as Jace approached her.

Isabelle froze when she saw who Jace was heading towards. She looked desperately at Alec, whose eyes were locked on Jace’s approaching figure. The youngest Lightwood knew that her fear was reflected plainly in her wide eyes.

When Jace made it to his sister, he crouched down beside her and looked deep into her eyes. For a moment, Izzy was truly scared of what might come out of his mouth but instead something came out of hers.

She let out a gasp of surprise when she felt her brother’s arms wrap around her tightly, reminiscent of their childhood. She quickly retaliated and clutched Jace to her firmly, letting her head rest in the crook of his neck.

“I’m so sorry”, she whimpered into the line of his collarbone.

Jace took a deep breath but his grip only tightened. “I forgive you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter is almost entirely Malec and will begin to explore the boys' pasts a little bit and we'll definitely be diving deeper into Magnus' "I've dealt with assholes like him before" comment. There will be flashbacks and a whole lot of character development next chapter. Yay. 
> 
> Seriously though, I really hope you guys liked this chapter. I tried to keep Jace as in character as possible but still explore the side of him that we rarely see and one that is reserved pretty much exclusively for Clary; his softer side.
> 
> As I said before, I wasn't sure about this chapter and am a little worried that is perhaps hasn't done to characters justice so please leave a comment to let me know what you thought and whether or not you hated it. 
> 
> Lots of love :)


	10. Grand Canyon and grand confessions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group spend some time at the Grand Canyon and Alec begins to notice Magnus growing more and more uncomfortable with... well, him. Will Magnus explain why?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all guys, I am so sorry this chapter is late! I went and met up with an old friend (one I haven't seen in 6 years!) yesterday and was so tired when I got home that I fell right asleep (makeup still on, contacts still in!) So, sorry but HERE IT IS. 
> 
> To make up for my aforementioned mistake.... this chapter is OVER 6,000 WORDS! WOW! So, you best enjoy guys! (Lots of group fun and Malec bonding)
> 
> WARNING: ATTEMPTED RAPE/SEXUAL ASSAULT (NOTHIGN GRAPHIC) AND HOMOPHOBIC SLURS

 

* * *

 

Chapter 10

It had been several days since the beach and the group were finally beginning to return to normal- the only differences were that Izzy and Clary continued to not talk to one another. Jace had long since dealt with the problem and had explained to the group that he and Clary were no longer together. The rest of the group had dealt with it surprisingly well and, much to Alec’s surprise, had made a point of providing distraction after distraction for the three individuals involved.

On the first day after the beach, they had driven to a small amusement park and had spent the day there after being split into groups; Jace, Alec, Izzy, Ragnor and Magnus, and Clary, Raphael, Cat and Simon. Alec and Magnus were pleased to see that little appeared to have changed between Izzy and Jace and, besides never mentioning Clary, they were closer than ever. Alec suspected it was Izzy’s guilt and Jace’s heartbreak that had made them desperate for one another’s support.

On the second day, Simon had insisted they visit a nearby park and watch the concert that was taking place there. Much to Alec’s chagrin the entire group had eagerly agreed and they had spent the entire evening jumping up and down to the devastatingly loud beat of the music Simon called “dubstep.”

On the third day they had decided to drive for the entire day, however Raphael and Simon had made the entire group stop to purchase a multitude of board games for the journey. Magnus had protested, saying that it was unfair he wouldn’t be able to play, but had been silenced by a pointed look from Alec. Izzy had winked at her brother when Alec offered to stay with Magnus while the others played games in Cat’s caravan. Magnus had gone to bed extremely worked up that night.

On the fourth day there was another museum.

On the fifth they decided to finally leave Oregon and drove through Nevada. They had avoided Las Vegas despite Jace’s pleas, promising to visit on the way back to, in Magnus’ words, “go out with a bang”.

Just two days later, they were in the Grand Canyon in Arizona.

The rest of the group, being as eager as they were, had wasted no time in running ahead of Magnus and Alec who had insisted on taking it slow in order to enjoy the view. They were hiking to Lipan Point to get a good view of the Canyon however Magnus and Alec were a good 15 minutes behind the others.

“Why is it always us?” Alec panted, dragging Magnus up a particularly steep piece of rock.

Magnus laughed. “They might do it on purpose”, he said teasingly.

Alec raised an eyebrow at him. “And why would they do that?”

“Oh I don’t know”, Magnus grinned as he produced a bottle of water from his bag. He took a long sip of the water before handing it over to Alec, who accepted it gratefully. “Maybe they’re giving us alone time.”

“They know about us?” Alec gasped, spitting the water from his mouth as he choked on his own shock.

Magnus grimaced. “That’s nothing like in the movies”, he mumbled to himself, ignoring Alec’s glare. “And no, they don’t know. I don’t think.”

Alec nodded slowly and handed back the bottle. Magnus smiled at him softly in the hopes it would reassure the younger man that Magnus was no offended by his desperation for privacy but, if anything, agreed with it.

They continued to walk for another couple of minutes, Magnus now leading the way - his dancer’s coordination came in handy- as the ground beneath them became slightly more uneven the closer they got to Lipan Point.

“Why is it that you want to keep us a secret?”

Magnus looked back at Alec in surprise. “Huh?”

“I mean, I do too but I was wondering what your reasoning was?”

“I could ask you the same thing”, Magnus said, pointedly looking at the view around him rather than at Alec.

Alec frowned. “I asked you first.”

“I asked you second”, Magnus added sarcastically.

Alec rolled his eyes and tore his hand from Magnus’. Magnus spun to face him abruptly but Alec was already walking ahead. He ignored Magnus’ call.

“Alec! Seriously, wait up!”

Turning to his boyfriend quickly, Alec glared. “This isn’t a joke, Mags.”

“I know that”, Magnus sighed. “I just… it’s tough for me to talk about.”

Alec froze and his face softened slightly. “I told you about my mom and dad”, he said quietly. Magnus could see the hurt in his eyes and quickly grabbed Alec’s hands.

“I know, and I am so grateful for that because I know how hard that was for you. But please just… give me some time.”

Alec was silent for a moment but Magnus could see his resolve slipping. Over the weeks they had spent together, Magnus was becoming familiar with Alec’s faces and little habits. Sending him a sweet smile, Magnus squeezed Alec’s hands tightly before bringing them to his lips to press a kiss to them.

Alec watched him closely with weary eyes. As he kissed his hand, Magnus looked up at Alec and watched as a tiny smile began to tug at the corners of his mouth. Alec rolled his eyes when Magnus continued to lavishly kiss at the back of his hand before pulling away with flourish.

“Fine”, he groaned. “Let’s go before you end up having sex with my hand.”

Magnus chuckled. “It's not the hand I'd want… well, actually-”

“Magnus!” Alec giggled. “Shut up!”

Magnus looked at Alec with a smirk that made Alec’s entire body shiver. “Make me”, Magnus teased.

Alec looked quickly down at Magnus’ lips and let out the faintest little whimper. Quickly shaking himself from his daze, Alec rolled his eyes and scurried off in front. "You need to stop saying that, it's getting annoying!"

“One day you’ll cave!” Magnus called after him.

“In your dreams!”

Magnus grinned. “Yeah, tell me about it!” He beamed when he heard Alec’s resounding laugh.

 

…

 

“It’s beautiful, isn’t it?”

“Is this the part where I tell you it is but I stare at you the whole time?”

Alec snorted with laughter. He looked across at Magnus who was in fact staring at him.

They had not long since joined the group and now they were all comfortable sitting on Lipan Point. Magnus had made a point of sitting beside Alec, close enough to be friendly but not close enough to be more, as they took in the view around them.

“Yes, this is the part where you lie to me and tell me the Grand Canyon is the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen”, Alec grinned.

Magnus nodded slowly. After a moment he looked at Alec with a small smile. “But if you know I’ll be lying, then what’s the point?”

“Tradition”, Alec said bluntly.

Magnus looked across at him and was once again taken aback at how the hot sun above them cast the perfect light across Alec. His eyes were wide and full of wonder as he took in the space around them and his lips were spread with surprise at every new thing he caught sight of. It was endearing and it made Magnus’ throat constrict with… something.

“We’re not overtly traditional”, he said quietly after a moment.

Alec laughed. “Why? Because we both have dicks?”

Magnus turned to Alec, scandalized, but the look of Alec’s face was too perfect. Magnus immediately joined in with his laughing.

“What are you two laughing about, ol’ love birds?” Izzy teased as she squeezed in between them and settled on the rocky ground with them.

Alec glared at her but his smile was still present. “Keep it down Iz.”

Izzy rolled her eyes. “Oh please. People would be more suspicious if I _didn’t_ tease you guys.”

Magnus grinned; she had a point. He said the same thing to Alec, who simply rolled his eyes.

“One day I’m gonna sprain my eyes from how much you people make me roll them”, Alec grumbled. Magnus and Izzy both shared a look, knowing from the tone of his voice that Alec was still teasing.

“So dramatic Alexander”, Magnus reprimanded playfully. Alec beamed at the use of his full name, something Magnus tended to do in private moments they shared. It had become a key word in Alec’s mind that reminded him of all of their shared moments, particularly romantic ones.

“Says you”, Izzy chimed in, looking Magnus’ outfit up and down.

Magnus grinned under her scrutiny and chuckled. “My outfits are not dramatic Isabelle, they are just right. This is what everyone should wear.”

“No one should wear a stylish suit like that to the Grand Canyon, Magnus”, Alec teased.

Magnus looked across Izzy to his boyfriend and poked his tongue out. Big surprise- Alec rolled his eyes. “Come take it off me then”, Magnus said, serious.

Alec spluttered and Izzy let out a loud and obnoxious giggle. The rest of the group turned to them in confusion but Magnus simply shook his head with a laugh.

“I hate you”, Alec said, laughing behind his hand.

“No you don’t”, Magnus winked.

Alec blew him a kiss in return, finger touching his cheek gently. Magnus smiled and sent Alec a look that he hoped accurately depicted all of his affection for the eldest Lightwood. Alec sent one in return.

 

…

 

“Magnus if you drop her I’ll kill you”, Jace threatened.

Magnus laughed and tightened his hold on Isabelle’s legs, legs that were wrapped tightly around his neck. Izzy squealed in alarm at the movement of his shoulders as he laughed and held onto his head tightly.

Alec was walking beside them and despite his own worry, was laughing along with them.

“It was nice knowing you Izzy”, Catarina called out teasingly. Izzy immediately sent her the finger in return.

“I’ll be fine”, Izzy insisted nervously as she tightened her hold on Magnus’ head. Magnus winced.

“Iz, lighten up or you’ll pop Magnus’ head”, Alec chortled.

“Hey!” Magnus cried, glaring playfully across at Alec. Alec looked away to make sure no one saw the blush that spread across his cheeks at simply catching Magnus’ eye.

“Magnus’ head needs downsizing anyway”, Clary laughed as she caught up with the group. Jace, Magnus and Alec smiled at her in welcome. Izzy, after releasing the tension in her shoulders, even laughed at Clary’s words.

“You _are_ very big headed Magnus”, she giggled.

Magnus groaned. “Why do I put up with you people?”

“Because Alec gives good head?” Jace chortled from beside him.

Magnus tensed immediately, feet rooted in the spot.

Alec cried out in surprise and anger as he ran at Jace and attacked him. Jace laughed and sped off, Alec on his heels. The rest of the group, save Magnus, watched, cheering, as Alec caught up with him and jumped onto Jace’s back to swat more effectively at his head.

“Alec!” Jace cried, unable to stop his laughter. “Stop man!”

Alec chuckled but continued _, harder._ “Take it back then, asshole!”

When the rest of the group caught up with them Alec had successfully pinned Jace, who was glaring playfully.

“Take it back”, Alec demanded,

Jace’s grin widened as he laughed. “Make me.”

Alec growled and swatted at his brother again. "Don't  _you_ start with that!"

From behind them, Izzy giggled as Magnus approached slowly.  “For a moment there that sounded like the beginning of some gay porno”, she sniggered.

Alec and Jace sprang apart, crying out their disgust as they clambered to their feet.

“Jesus Iz! That’s gross!”

“Izzy! Seriously?”

“She’s got a point”, Magnus said offhandedly, carrying Isabelle past them. Both brothers’ mouths dropped in shock and they ran after them. Cat and Clary squealed with laughter as Jace and Alec blocked Magnus pathway and, with folded arms, glared at him.

“Get ‘im Alec!” Raphael called from behind the group. “Beat his ass!”

Alec snorted at Raph’s words but quickly composed himself. “Take _that_ back, Mags.”

Magnus rolled his eyes, looking between both Lightwoods. “If I say ‘make me’ that’ll make it a gay threesome porno”, Magnus sighed dramatically.

Jace groaned. “Nope! I’m done!” Shaking his head, Jace joined Simon and Raphael at the back of the group, ignoring everyone’s laughter.

Even _Alec_ laughed.

“That’s seriously so gross, Magnus”, Alec sighed as they all began to trek down the path together.

Magnus and Izzy both smirked.

“You can punish him for it later, Alec”, Izzy teased quietly with a wink.

Alec ignored Izzy's cheerful response and felt himself smile at the amusement that he heard resonate around the Canyon.

What he didn't ignore though, was Magnus' very tense smile. 

 

…

 

“It’s far too late to request a permit for the Canyon so why not just find the closest camp site and get a spot?” Izzy had said, grinning.

Everyone had agreed.

“Yes!” Magnus cheered, jumping from his position on the park bench the group were sitting on. They had finally left the Canyon and driven to a small diner close by to eat dinner.

 Jostling Alec as he leapt from his seat, Magnus ran to Catarina and began to ruffle her hair excitedly.

“Magnus stop!” Cat cackled as she brushed away his hands.

Magnus laughed harder. “I told you we’d get booze!” 

Alec watched in amusement as Magnus smacked Ragnor around the backside of the head after having caught him muttering. “Shut up with the age thing!”

Despite their confusion, Simon, Clary and Jace appeared more than a little excited at the prospect of a campfire and alcohol and Isabelle looked beyond pleased with her idea. Ragnor and Raphael on the other hand looked beyond annoyed and were it not for Magnus’ adorable behaviour, Alec was sure he too would be reacting similarly.

Considering it was already 6 and they were currently eating dinner at a small diner, bathing in the newfound sunlight, Izzy decided they best find a suitable place to “camp” soon. Alec had protested, since they didn’t have tents but Izzy had just insisted that they either camp without them or camp with the RVs. Even Magnus had raised an eyebrow at the logic in that.

Regardless, Alec soon found himself parading the alcohol aisles of the nearest convenience store, Magnus dragging him along to point out every good, affordable beverage. In the end, after Alec’s constant nagging, he settled on 3 bottles of vodka, a bottle of wine for Ragnor, several questionable bottles he promised made good cocktails, two bottles of whiskey, a crate of beer and several bottles of tequila. He had even insisted on small plastic shot glasses. Alec was scared, to say the least.

When they returned, just about able to physically carry all of the alcohol, Izzy had instantly perked up and raced to join them. Jace had come over to assist in the transportation of the drinks, slapping Izzy’s hand away as she continually attempted to reach inside to admire the “adorable” shot glasses.

Due to Izzy and, surprisingly, Simon’s enthusiasm, they had already located a nearby camping ground and had excitedly told Magnus and Catarina the directions. After a short 45 minute drive, they had arrived and paid a small entry fee before driving into a large and shockingly empty camping field.

They parked both RVs beside one another and began to move what little portable furniture they had outside. Alec laid out several blankets and sheets across the ground and settled comfortably on some pillows. Jace, ever the beast he was, had detached the RV coach cushion and had set it on the blankets to use as a makeshift pillow for himself and Izzy.

Cat and Magnus brought out the drinks, Cat sliding in beside Jace and Izzy, who was fidgeting in her seat out of excitement. Raphael soon came and joined them, sitting between Simon and Clary.

Magnus had taken it upon himself to sit comfortably beside Alec, grinning playfully at the man when their proximity made Alexander raise an eyebrow; he hadn't forgotten Magnus' earlier reaction, and his own aversion to the group seeing them together. Ignoring it, Alec smiled back and began to open the crate of beer

When Magnus asked where Ragnor was, Raphael grumpily responded that the Brit had taken the wine and closed himself indoors, reluctant to get drunk with what he deemed as “children”.

Magnus laughed and ignored the looks of annoyance from Jace and Izzy.

Izzy perked up instantly when Alec began to hand out beer to everyone, passing Clary who insisted she share Izzy’s since the pair weren’t overly keen on it anyway. Alec couldn’t supress the small hint of doubt he felt inside at that and cast an eye to Jace who was completely ignorant of the situation. Izzy looked apprehensive but nodded in agreement anyway.

Deciding not to say anything, he settled back into Magnus’ side and took a swig of the alcohol, sighing when it hit his tongue. He wasn’t a huge fan of alcohol, but occasionally it was a God sent.

“So, who wants to play never have I ever?” Izzy called out.

Raphael let out a deep groan in response but it was drowned out by the endless stream of cheers from the rest of the group, save Alec who simply nodded sheepishly.

Magnus seemed more than excited for the game and insisted Alec move to sit further away for its duration so that they might be able to see each other’s responses. Alec laughed but complied, secretly grateful for not missing out on seeing when Magnus drank and when he didn’t.

Cat decided to start. “Never have I ever… um, kissed someone over twice my age.”

To Alec’s surprise, Raphael and Jace were the only ones to drink. Laughing, Jace explained that he had found a “cougar” one night whereas Raphael just smirked and refused to say more.

“I know”, Magnus called cheerfully. The look Raphael sent him made him chuckle. “I won’t say anything Raph, but oh boy is it good!”

Alec spun to Magnus in surprise and the look he sent Raphael was one of betrayal. Mangus quickly leaned down and pressed his lips to Alec’s ear. “I’ll tell you later”, he chuckled, ignoring the death glare he received from Raphael.

Izzy grinned. “My turn! Okay, never have I ever gone skinny dipping!”

Alec felt his cheeks go up in flames as he attempted to subtly take a drink. Izzy and Magnus let out peals of laughter when they questioned him and Alec simply ignored them.

“C’mon darling, you have to share!” Magnus teased.

Alec tensed only slightly at the use of the pet name but from the looks he received from everyone around them, no one had caught it and were more interested in his response.

“Nope!” he said firmly, ignoring their groans.

“Never have I ever slept with someone of the same sex”, Clary said somewhat awkwardly. Jace cast her a glance and was almost ashamed of himself when he fought to contain a sigh of relief when Izzy's drinking was followed by teasing remarks from Magnus about "Tessa". At least it wasn't "Clary". 

"Hang on! Tessa? No work relationships!" Cat chastised loudly. Magnus rolled his eyes at Alec, who grinned. 

Simon, Raphael, Alec and even Cat all took a drink at that point, all of them laughing at the sheer volume of them that had done so. To Alec surprise, Magnus shifted uncomfortably but did not drink. 

Simon once again made a comment about heterosexuality being very rare in their group, to which Jace bristled slightly but still managed to laugh.

“Okay then Simon”, Jace challenged. “Never have I ever been gay”, he said somewhat triumphantly.

Simon cackled. “I’m not gay, idiot!”

Jace grumbled. “Technicalities!”

Everyone laughed as only Alec took a drink. “Hey, you’re all somewhat gay! Except Mr. Straight Guy over there.”

“Okay then!”, Izzy laughed as she took a small sip of the drink. Eventually almost everyone in the circle had taken a small sip of their drinks except Jace and Cat (who insisted that while she may have slept with a girl one time, she was completely straight).

“Never have I ever not watched Star Wars”, Simon said. Everyone simultaneously groaned before pointedly not drinking (some of them hadn’t even watched it, Alec knew, but they just didn’t want Simon to go into some rant about what they were missing).

When it was Raphael’s turn he simply grumbled, to which everyone teasingly took a drink. Raphael glared.

Magnus beamed when it was his turn. “Oh, yay! Okay, never have I ever kissed Magnus Bane.” Alec raised an eyebrow but something in Magnus’ eyes told him that Magnus was looking forward to embarrassing members of their circle.

Alec blushed when he saw Cat, Izzy and Raphael take a drink. Cat had apparently done so as a dare once, Izzy had supposedly done it to “get her fill” of Magnus and Raphael refused to elaborate once more.

Alec looked at the ground nervously when he realized he would have to drink. He grasped his beer tightly and willed himself to pick it up and bring it to his lips.

“Okay then, Alec your turn!”

Alec turned to Magus in surprise but the look Magnus sent him was one of understanding and perhaps even shock. He must not have realized the situation that he had put both himself and Alexander in. Alec quickly nodded.

“Um… okay. I- er… Never have I ever been in love”, Alec called out across their circle.

Cat drank.

Simon and Raphael drank, sharing a subtle look.

Clary drank.

Jace drank, and Alec watched as his eyes involuntarily flickered to Clary.

Magnus drank.

And Izzy drank.

Alec looked at Izzy in shock, apparently having been the only one to notice her drinking. When she met his eyes, Alec raised an eyebrow but she simply ignored him. Alec knew her, and he knew that while she deeply cared for her ex (Marcus if Alec remembered correctly), it had not been love. That and she only did hook-ups and not proper relationships.

Alec suspected it was Clary she was talking about.

“Okay okay, enough”, Izzy said nervously. “We’re gonna play something else now!”

“If she says spin the bottle-”, Magnus groaned into Alec’s ear, pulling the younger man back into his side and draping an arm behind his back subtly. Alec watched him out the corner of his eyes.

“SPIN THE BOTTLE”, Izzy cheered loudly.

Magnus groaned and despite being quite annoyed about the situation too, Alec could only focus on the deep rumbling of Magnus’ chest that resonated against his side and the sound of his breathy groan in Alec’s ear as he dropped his head to Alec's shoulder. Alec shuddered and from the sound of Magnus sucking in a breath, he got the sense that Magnus felt it.

“Me first!” he heard Izzy call, but his mind was blank.

Magnus let his lips rest lightly on Alec’s neck, just above the joint of his collarbone. Breathing deeply against his neck, Magnus tightened his arms around Alec, allowing the man to sink further into his side. Alec suppressed a moan when Magnus’ breath traveled across his shoulder as the man moved, his lips faintly trailing across the skin until they returned to Alec’s neck, who was close to combusting.

Magnus, for the first time, let himself kiss Alec in front of the group, not that they were paying attention. Despite it only being on his neck, Alec felt a swoop of relief in his stomach when he felt Magnus’ lips on him. For a moment Alec strongly debated whether it would be appropriate, considering their current company, to grind back against the man.

Speaking of current company….

Alec’s eyes fluttered open to the sight of Izzy and Simon kissing, everyone but Raphael cheering in encouragement. Alec quickly moved his neck away from Magnus’ lips to ensure no one spotted them, panicked and thankful that they hadn’t thus far. Despite their physical and emotional closeness and the teasing from the entire group, Alec knew that no one besides Izzy knew that they had kissed, let alone were together.

Magnus wanted to groan out his frustration but upon realizing why Alexander had moved away, he tensed noticeably. Without even realizing, he had foolishly allowed himself to get far too not-so-friendly with Alec in front of _everyone._ Looking around the group slightly panicked, he was relieved to see no one had noticed and that, more importantly, no one had looks of disgust on their face or slurs on their lips. Sighing in relief, he settled back into the grass.

Alec ignored the guilt he felt when he heard Magnus sigh and quickly busied himself with spinning the bottle. The bottle spun precariously for a moment before landing comfortably on Raphael. Alec immediately paled.

“No, no, no, no, no”, Alec groaned as he sat up.

Besides looking slightly bored, Raphael appeared fine and simply leaned towards Alec to kiss him. Alec nervously met him half way, blocking out the boyish cheers from those around him.

For someone who had crushed on Raphael and wanted desperately to kiss him when they were 15, Alec was slightly disappointed at the lack of… anything he felt. It wasn’t surprising since both men were in no way interested in each other but Alec still had expected something more.

Laughing as he pulled away, Alec glanced to Magnus. “I feel sorry for Simon”, he said teasingly. Even Raphael managed to laugh at his words.

Since Alec had skipped, they decided to continue from him. Magnus insisted that he go next and the game continued from there.

By the time it got to Alec’s 3rd turn he had kissed Raphael and Catarina. While Cat was beautiful, she had only further confirmed just how gay Alec was.

At this point, all of the beer, cocktails and tequila had been consumed so the group were surviving almost entirely on vodka, which had significantly impacted their decisions.

“So whoever you get you have to make out with! Not just a kiss!”

Everyone cheered, even Alec, who at this point was desperate for a distraction. Magnus' alarmingly quiet nature was confusing him.

First was Jace who willingly made out with Catarina. Cat had appeared apprehensive at first but after a solid 2 minute make out, she winked at Jace and giggled nervously. Magnus had shouted warnings at Jace from across the circle and Clary tried desperately to pay their exchange no attention.

Isabella spun the bottle and threw her arms in the air, cheering as it continued to spin. As it began to slow Alec noticed she glanced cautiously at Clary more and more frequently.

Well shit.

Caught in his thoughts, Alec was shocked when he heard screaming from around the group. Startling, he looked down and saw the bottle pointed firmly at him.

“No!” he shouted. “She’s my sister! No way in hell!”

“I agree. I am so not kissing my brother!”

“I’ll kiss her”, Magnus said from behind Alec. Alec turned to look at Magnus and involuntarily frowned. Magnus, despite the nauseating feeling he got when seeing Alexander displeased, plastered a playful grin on his face. All he had to do was kiss Isabelle (again, he might add) and not only would the entire group be so shocked that it would be indisputable that he and Alec were _not_ together, but also, the entire group would be reminded that Magnus wasn't gay. Now, while there was absolutely no problem with being gay Magnus felt his blood involuntarily run cold at the prospect of being perceived as such. Ignoring how offended it made him feel on Alexander's behalf, he hurriedly joined Izzy in the center of the circle.  

Izzy looked at Magnus in question when they met in the center but Magnus refused to meet her eyes. Grabbing her face both gently but passionately, he got to work. 

To Alec's dismay, Magnus and Izzy appeared more than comfortable with the new making out rule. They wasted no time in slotting their lips together, their resounding breaths and moans loud enough for Alec to hear. Izzy knotted her hands firmly in Magnus’ hair as the older man tipped her face back to plunder her mouth eagerly.

When Alec saw a hint of obvious tongue he suppressed a gag in response and hurriedly looked away.

He knew it was just a game and that Magnus had no feelings for Izzy whatsoever, but the sinking feeling in his stomach forced him to turn away. He could still hear the sounds of wet lips caressing but he refused to acknowledge whose lips it was.

When he cast a glance to Clary he noticed she had taken the opposite approach and her eyes were glued to the pair. She appeared uncomfortable in her seat and the glare she subconsciously sent Magnus could have burned a hole through his head were he paying her any attention. Alec almost felt sympathetic towards her.

His attention was drawn back to the couple as they finally pulled apart. Izzy let out a satisfied giggle as she collapsed back in her seat.

“You’re one lucky guy Alec”, she laughed.

At the mention of his name, Magnus internally groaned; of course Izzy would somehow find a way to make a heterosexual make out link back to a possible homosexual relationship between the pair. Forcing himself to relax, he laughed her words off as though they were a joke but he wasted no time in quickly looking at his boyfriend to see his reaction.

Alec simply shook his head and watched the tension fall from Magnus’ shoulders instantly. When Magnus returned to him he pointedly didn’t allow physical contact between and instead just sat closely beside him. Alec suppressed the disappointment he felt and simply focused on the game once more.

The game ended before Alec had a chance to spin again- thank God! The group began to disappear; Cat stumbled back into her RV, followed closely behind by Clary. Jace disappeared into his own RV, cheering when he made it up the first step without stumbling. Alec watched as Isabelle sent the retreating figures of Catarina and Clary a glare. Alec noticed Izzy’s look and quickly detached himself from Magnus and went to talk to her.

“I was right, wasn’t I?”

Izzy looked up at his words. Instantly knowing what he was referring to, she quickly looked around the group but saw the remaining three all occupied in a drunken conversation.

“Oh Alec”, she sighed drunkenly. “Aren’t you always?”

“You must be really drunk if you’re saying that”, Alec laughed, slumping down beside his sister.

“Don’t pretend you aren’t jealous too.”

“About what?”

“Me kissing Magnus”, Izzy insisted. She turned to her brother with a dopey smile on her face. “You’re totally jealous cos I got a bit of Magnus and you wanted the bit first.”

Alec felt his stomach turn but sent his sister a smile anyway. “I did” he said sarcastically.

Izzy beamed. “I’m s-so glad you’ve found a person Alec.”

“A person?” Alec’s resounding laugh made Izzy chuckle.

“Yes, a person. And it good that it’s a person as wonderful and sparkly as Magnus Babe.”

Alec felt a smirk slip onto his face. “It’s Bane, Iz.”

Izzy nodded, her head almost too heavy for her shoulders. Alec decided then to take her inside. He avoided Cat’s RV, knowing that the last thing Izzy wanted was to be drunk while in a room with Clary- anything could be said. He carried her to his and Jace’s room and deposited her safely on the bed beside Jace, who was already fast asleep.  

“W-why are you locking me up Alec?”

Alec smiled. “I’m not Iz. But you need to go to sleep.”

“Oh. Yeah. Yeah, I get it. I understand. Me comprende”, she giggled.

Trying not to laugh at her words, Alec tucked her in hastily and turned to go. Before he did, he pressed a gently kiss to her forehead and stroked her hair gently as he watched her eyes close. He smiled at his baby sister affectionately when she curled around Jace’s side, before exiting the room and heading down the small corridor to go back outside.

He was intersected when Raphael and Simon stumbled into the RV doorway clumsily, clasping each other’s hands. Alec, knowing where they were heading, quickly backed up against the wall and let them hurry past.

When he noticed that Magnus was still absent, Alec decided to head back outside and join him. He spotted the older man lounging on the left behind blankets and pillows. With just him there, the pile appeared far larger and even more welcoming.

Hearing approaching footsteps, Magnus turned to face Alec and the smile that he sent him almost made Alec blush. Magnus, although no doubt tipsy, was incredibly stable on his feet when he rose to meet Alec.

“They okay?”

Alec nodded. “Just put her down, Jace is fast asleep too.”

“How drunk are you?” Magnus chuckled.

Alec shrugged, smiling. “Quite a bit, but I’m okay.”

Magnus nodded. “Good”, he grinned. Quickly, he grabbed Alec’s hand and dragged him towards the ground. Alec gasped in surprise when Magnus laid on the blankets and pulled Alec into his side.

They remained silent for a moment, and Alec took the time to simply bask in the peaceful silence around them.

Magnus shifted slightly, looking down at Alec with fond eyes. Taking a deep breath, he began. "You're probably upset, right? Because I kissed Izzy?"

Alec tensed noticeably in his arms. "I guess I'm wondering why you did it, and why you've been so distant with me this evening. Everything was fine earlier", Alec finally said, his voice void of any emotion besides disappointment. 

Magnus tensed. "With Izzy knowing about us and Cat too-"

"Cat knows?"

"-I got panicked. Everyone makes jokes about us but before they were just jokes. Now, everyone seems to actually think that we're together."

Alec forced himself not to get upset or angry at Magnus' words. Instead he settled for quietly asking, "Are you really  _that_ against it?"

"Aren't you?" Magnus asked softly. 

Alec shook his head. "I don't want them to know because I want time alone with you to get to know you before everything changes. And it  _will_ change if they know we're together."

Magnus sighed, resting his chin on Alec's head. His heart broke a little bit when he felt Alec tense at the movement. “Y’know… the reason I don’t want us to tell the others about our relationship is that-”

“Magnus”, Alec sighed. “You don’t have to tell me. I won’t hold it against you if you don’t.”

Despite his kind words, Magnus could hear the disappointment in his voice; God this boy was selfless.

Magnus nodded with a tight smile. “Oh I know”, he insisted. “But you deserve to know.”

“Okay”, Alec whispered against Magnus’ chest.

Magnus tightened his arms around Alec and sighed deeply. “I was about 17, maybe 18…”

 

_“Fuck off Camille”, Magnus growled._

_Camille giggled. “Oh come on Magnus! Maybe it’ll work!”_

_Magnus recoiled, pushing harder against Camille’s shoulders. She didn’t budge.  Admittedly, Magnus was a rather scrawny boy and Camille was known for her role as the cheerleading captain but it was still somewhat embarrassing for Magnus that he could not relinquish Camille’s hold on him. Camille made it worse by laughing._

_“Oh Magnus!” she crooned. “He must have done something to you! You’re already becoming a girl!”_

_“Shut up!” Magnus cried as he kicked his legs angrily in an attempt to dislodge Camille from where she was sitting on his chest._

_Magnus clenched his fists, held in place by Camille, when the woman above him leaned down and licked across his lower lip. Unable to move, Magnus winced and quickly flung his head to the side to avoid her lips._

_“Oh my, Magnus. It’s okay baby, I’ll fix you.”_

_When her hand crept towards his crotch, where his zipper was already torn open due to her own hands, Magnus felt himself tense and the desperate need to cry returned. Instead of giving her the satisfaction, Magnus reacted as quickly as he could._

_Magnus growled as he tore his wrist from Camille’s grasp. Barely giving her a moment to gasp, he pushed her off of his chest and clambered to his feet desperately. He stood on one side of the room and Camille stood on the other, only her large 4 poster bed separating them._

_“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Magnus screeched as he hastily zipped up his trousers, ignoring the burning behind his eyes as he desperately fought not to cry._

_Camille rolled her eyes. “Maybe he sucked the brains out of you too while he was at it”, she laughed snidely._

_Magnus glared, baring his teeth as he suppressed yet another growl of frustration._

_“Seriously, Magnus!” she laughed. “I’m just trying to help.”_

_“Help? Help me how? By forcing yourself on me?!”_

_“By_ fixing _you”, Camille insisted. From the look on her face, Magnus could see she was telling the truth, meaning she actually believed he was broken, that forcing herself upon him would “fix” him. Magnus forced himself not to gag._

_“Fix me? There’s nothing wrong with me!”_

_Camille frowned and her eyes turned to slits in her anger. “He made you gay! That needs to be fixed, Magnus!”_

_Magnus choked on his own surprise. “Gay?! I’m not gay Camille!”_

_“Oh that’s right”, she rolled her eyes. “You’re bisexual, right? God, stop kidding yourself!”_

_“I’m not! Fuck you!”_

_“I will if you’d let me!”_

_Magnus paled and stared at Camille in shock. “Why are you doing this?” he whispered, voice lost to him in his surprise._

_Camille rolled her eyes again. “It’s the only way to fix you Mags”, she said, voice soft. “He did this to you.”_

_“Getting your dick sucked by a guy doesn’t_ break _you, Camille!”_

_Camille’s lips curled in disgust. “It does when the entire school knows about it. I can’t deal with their words anymore Magnus, you’re my boyfriend! And I have to fix you!”_

_Magnus gaped at her. “I’m not your boyfriend, you psychotic bitch! We broke up weeks ago!”_

_“We all know that was because of that slut you call Will!”_

_“Slut? Seriously?”_

_Camille snarled, “Yes, slut! He’s disgusting! He’s poisoned your body and now you don’t want to be with me- he broke you!”_

_Magnus shook his head in disbelief and finally made for the door. Camille rushed to him, grabbing his arms firmly and pulling him against her but Magnus was quicker. Magnus tore his arms away with what little strength he still had and quickly raced from the room, speeding down the hall and ignoring her shrieks as she ran after him._

_“You sick fuck!” he screamed as he pushed his way through the crowds blocking the stairs._

_Camille cackled. “Fine! Enjoy life as a fag!”_

_The crowd of the party all began to part quickly for him, the silence surrounding him almost suffocating. As he watched everyone step out of his way, he saw for the first time what it was that made them move._

_Disgust._

_They were disgusted by him._

_Ignoring the burning in his eyes, Magnus pushed through the crowds even faster, throwing his body through the sea of people to make his way outside._

_He could see the door and was just a few steps away when someone stepped into his line of sight._

_“Going someone homo?”_

_Magnus glared at Edward, Camille’s ex. Just what he needed._

_“Get out of my way”, he demanded._

_Edward snorted. “Or what? You gonna sprinkle your fairy dust over me?”_

_Magnus desperately attempted to ignore the anger that built inside of him as he clenched his fists tightly and bit his lip to refrain from saying too much. Edward was at least two inches taller than him and his build was easily double that of Magnus’._

_“C’mon then, gayboy! You wanna bit? That’s what you like, isn’t it? You like it rough-”_

_Magnus swung. He ignored the sound of gasping, his attention focused purely on the pain shooting up his wrist. Edward slowly wiped his lip and turned his head back to Magnus, who caught sight of the blood on Edward’s knuckle and lower lip. Magnus stared in shock as Edward blinked in surprise._

_Wasting no time, Magnus ducked under Edward’s arm and ran from the house, tearing his way through the streets in the direction of Milton House._

_He should have never snuck out. He should have never trusted Camille. And he certainly shouldn’t have_ punched _Edward. God, he was gonna pay for that on Monday._

 

“As you can imagine, I paid a pretty hefty price for that come Monday morning”, Magnus laughed pathetically.

At this point, Alec had sat up and shuffled until he was opposite Magnus, able to watch his boyfriend’s face as he recounted the tale. Magnus looked down at his lap nervously, in an attempt to avoid Alec’s gaze.

“She tried to rape you?” Alec whispered in shock, almost as though if he didn’t say it then it wouldn’t be true.

Magnus let his eyes flicker up to Alec’s and he grimaced. “. Why do you think I suddenly got into fitness, into dance? She always _was_ a bit forceful”, he said sarcastically.

“This isn’t a joke, Magnus!”

Magnus rolled his eyes. “If it helps me accept it, then hell yes it is.”

Alec sighed. Magnus watched as Alec’s face contorted with sadness and winced when Alec let out a sob. Alec quickly covered his mouth, attempting to stifle his sobs but they were too loud. Magnus watched him sadly.

“It’s okay Alec. I’m okay. It’s just… that’s why I have trouble being with you…well, with them knowing. Will was the last guy I was ever really with and I... I _can't_ go through that again”

Alec gasped for breaths around his tears and Magnus felt his heart clench at his boyfriend’s reaction. "But, you're so confident? You flirted with me openly the whole time?"

Magnus nodded. "Sometimes confidence is the best way to hide fear", he said simply.

Alec took a shuddering breath and threw himself in Magnus’ arms, clutching him tightly. “I am so sorry”, he cried into his boyfriend’s shoulder.

Magnus smiled sadly, feeling his throat tighten as he withheld his own tears. “It’s not exactly your fault”, Magnus said hoarsely.

Alec sniffed into the material of Magnus’ shirt, shaking his head. “You don’t deserve to be treated like that. Why have you spent your entire time so far talking about how I deserve to be treated when you were treated like that?”

Magnus closed his eyes and tried desperately to block out the sounds of Alec’s tears. His heart was slowly cracking under the weight of the guilt and sympathy he felt for Alexander.

“Listen to me, Alec. I’m okay. I love that you’re worried, that you’re upset, but I _am_ okay. Honestly. The only problem I have is with everyone knowing about us, and you’ve already accepted that. That’s all I need from you”, Magnus said quietly, pressing a kiss to Alec’s hair as he wrapped his arms around his boyfriend.

Alec nodded into his chest. “I get it now.”

Magnus smiled. “You always got it, baby.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That chapter got a little bit deeper than planned but its triggering a really great few chapters that will have the boys opening up a little more and sharing more about themselves so *YAY*
> 
> Anyway, hope you guys really enjoyed this chapter! LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THOUGHT BELOW :D
> 
> (P.S- thank you to My-Darling-Alexander for giving me the idea of having it be Camille who hurt Magnus in that past. I already had this plot idea but thank you for the idea of bringing Camille into it :* )


	11. Acceptance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec attempts to understand and accept what Magnus has told him about his past by seeking the help of Izzy and Raphael

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello guys! I'm back (admittedly a little later than usual but SHHH)
> 
> So, this chapter is...special. I've never uploaded smut in my entire life and I'm almost nervous to do it... like.. can future employers see this and wonder why I'm writing gay smut? That thought seriously terrifies me! :L
> 
> Either way, this chapter therefore DOES contain some smut so if that irks you out just skip it and if not... well, enjoy. 
> 
> WARNING: SMUT (nothing too explicit)

  


  


* * *

Chapter 11

"So, how are you?"

Izzy smiled softly at her older brother but after years of knowing her, Alec could clearly see the pain still there in her eyes. It had been just a little over a week and despite the fact that Jace was clearly working through the situation as best as he could, Alec had noticed Izzy having a little trouble.

"Better", she insisted firmly. "Me and Jace seem okay, although we still can't talk about it. But, we both don't really talk to Clary- I know for a fact Jace is still a bit uncomfortable with that."

Alec nodded in understanding. Truthfully, he found it shocking that Jace was even still on the road trip considering the heartbreak he had faced, but then again, his brother was certainly a strong individual. Besides that, the compassion and understanding that Alec found in his younger brother reminded him greatly of, dare he say it, himself. Alec always had been calm when confronted with a problem and it appeared that Jace had finally taken a leaf from his book.

Izzy on the other hand, had always been slightly more emotionally driven than her brothers so it surprised Alec very little that she was having a harder time than Jace in approaching Clary.

"You need to talk to her, Iz."

Izzy shook her head. "No way, Alec! She told me, well she didn't tell me but she did, that she has feelings for me and I cannot, and will not, do that to Jace."

Alec, despite his conflicting feelings, knew that Izzy was in love with Clarissa and that Jace would get over it. Sure, Jace was distraught but Alec knew that the love he felt for Clary would force him to accept whoever she wanted to be with after him. He had told Izzy much the same thing but she had done little with the information.

"So", Izzy huffed, eager to change the subject. "How are you and Magnus?"

Alec found himself inadvertently casting a glance around the RV for a moment to ensure no one was around before he responded.

"It's good, good yeah. Well, I mean... He, er, well he told me something last night. And I'm not quite sure what to do with the new information to be honest", he confessed.

Despite priding himself on being a rational thinker, Alec had been completely lost on what to do or say when Magnus had revealed his secret. The pair had simply fallen asleep that night and parted ways in the morning and had shared little more than a good morning kiss. The last time he had seen Magnus since this morning had been in the RV briefly before heading over to Cat's in order to talk to Izzy.

Izzy frowned. "What did he say?"

Alec ignored the urge to explain and share the story with his sister and instead shook his head with a sigh. "I can't", he said solemnly.

Izzy nodded, "I get it" she said kindly. "Either way, whatever it was it couldn't have been that bad." At Alec's silence she tensed. "Right?"

Alec sighed. "It's bad but it's not bad for us, as a relationship. Just bad for him, I guess. Although, I can't stop thinking about it."

Izzy took a deep breath, looking at her brother. His eyes were perfectly reflecting the confusion he was obviously feeling in his mind and his lack of words was endearing but also saddening. "Look, big bro. All you have to do is no matter what, be there for him. Just... Whatever he needs, okay?"

Alec looked up at his little sister and for a moment had the passing thought that somehow she had matured faster than him. He wasn't sure when it had happened but his little sister grew up.

"Yeah... Thanks Iz."

"Don't thank me", she laughed. "My advice sucks!"

Alec chuckled at her words but made a point to remind her of their inaccuracy.

 

…

 

Alec, stuck in the wrong caravan for the majority of the day, settled for spending some time with Ragnor. To his surprise, Ragnor was rather welcoming and had even explained that after several weeks he was starting to find someone likeable in Alec.

Alec refrained from being offended and decided that it would be the perfect opportunity to find out some embarrassing Magnus centric stories. And boy did he find out a few.

 

To Magnus, 2:34pm

_So, Ragnor told me a rather interesting story about Peru_

From Magnus, 2:36pm

_WHAT IS HE TELLING YOU?_

To Magnus, 2:37pm

_Don’t text and drive ;)_

From Magnus, 2:43pm

_Red light, bitch ;)_

_But seriously what is he telling you?_

To Magnus, 2:45pm

_Something about you and an ancient Incan relic ;)_

From Magnus, 2:46pm

_That little bitch… ignore everything he says Alexander! Everything_

To Magnus, 2:46pm

_He also told me an interesting story about you getting caught naked in London??_

From Magnus, 2:47pm

_Small mistake on my part… moving on._

To Magnus, 2:49pm

_Why were you naked?_

From Magnus, 2:52pm

_Wouldn’t you like to know!_

To Magnus, 2:53pm

_Yeah I would_

From Magnus, 2:55pm

_Some girl I was with… I pissed her off during sex and she locked me out the hotel… okay?_

To Magnus, 2:57pm

_Wasn’t aware I was dating a criminal_

 

From Magnus, 2:58pm

_Public indecency isn’t exactly an impressive crime, baby._

_Why? You like that?_

To Magnus, 2:58pm

_What? The bad boy image? :)_

From Magnus, 3:00pm

_Aaww you use emojis, Alexander!_

_And yes, the bad boy image_

To Magnus, 3:09pm

_Shut up. And yes, I like it_

From Magnus, 3:12pm

_At some point on this trip we ARE getting a bed to ourselves and god help me, Alexander_

To Magnus, 3:13pm

_That a promise? ;)_

From Magnus, 3:14pm

_I hate you._

To Magnus, 3:16pm

_No you don’t ;)_

From Magnus, 3:24pm

_Fuck you._

To Magnus, 3:24pm

_Okay ;)_

…

 

They finished their rather uneventful day by heading to a restaurant for dinner. Alec, despite their earlier texting, was still uncomfortable. He didn’t want to be, but bearing this new information and now the added pressure of making sure they definitely stayed private was weighing on him.

It was during dinner that he was reminded of a small piece of information Magnus had shared the night before; he had said he had ran home to Milton. Meaning Milton house. So, if anyone was to be a suitable candidate to talk to about what Magnus had shared, it was Raphael.

After dinner had finished, Ragnor had gone outside to smoke, ignoring Magnus’ criticism. Raphael had followed and, knowing that the second they returned to the RV Simon would probably be all over him, Alec decided to follow too.

“You don’t smoke, Alec?”

Alec turned to Simon and shrugged. “Neither does Raph. Just want some fresh air, that’s all.”

From across the table, Izzy met his eyes and smiled softly. Alec sometimes found it annoying when Izzy was so skilled at reading him but most of the time it came in rather handy. She slowly rose from her chair and nodded to her brother.

“I’ll come with you”, she said.

Alec frowned. The look he sent Izzy was one of confusion but after a moment he forced himself to smile welcomingly to save face in front of the others. The dynamic at the table shifted when Izzy began to move and the remaining people awkwardly sat in silence. Alec sent Magnus a pleading look and with a nod, Magnus started a conversation that seemed to suck in Jace, Clary, Simon and Catarina.

Izzy eventually reached him and dragged him outside by his arm. Alec made a sound of protest but allowed her to do so.

They met the other two men outside where they were leaning on a wall and sharing conversation. Izzy sent Alec a meaningful look before joining them and immediately pulling Ragnor into an entirely separate discussion.

Alec had no idea how Izzy knew that he wanted time alone with Raphael but he was beyond thankful for Raphael almost immediately made his way over to Alec, beaming.

“Long time no see”, Raphael teased.

Alec smirked and patted Raphael’s shoulder. “Yeah. We’re in the same RV but you’re always busy.”

Raphael rolled his eyes. “Just because I have a boyfriend to make out with doesn’t mean you have to get all jealous.”

 “I’m not jealous, I’ve kissed you now, remember? And you’re really not all that good.”

Raphael smacked his arm playfully before he crossed his arms and looked at Alec with a serious face. Alec shifted uncomfortably.

“What’s on your mind then?”

Alec smiled ruefully; Raphael knew him too well. “I was, um… well, I was wondering if you knew about Magnus.”

“Magnus? Yeah, he’s that Asian guy you’re drooling over, dark hair, green-y yellow-y eyes.”

Alec rolled his eyes at the sarcasm, knowing he should have expected it.

Raphael groaned. “Seriously Alec, what’s up?” he said.

“Do you know about that time when Magnus was about 17, maybe 18, and went to a party?”

Raphael furrowed his eyebrows and frowned. “He went to a few. Anything more specific?”

Alec looked around them nervously, ensuring that Ragnor was still deep in conversation to Isabelle, which he was. He looked back at Raphael and at the dark look in his eyes, Alec looked away nervously. Fiddling with his hands, Alec spoke. “About that time with… er, with Camille?”

Raphael tensed slightly and were it not for Alec staring pointedly at his shoulders rather than his face, Alec wouldn’t have noticed how he straightened his back. The look he sent Alec was stern, protective even.

“Why would he tell you about that?”

Alec immediately glared at him. “We’re close, okay? I’ve told him about my mom and dad.”

Raphael looked at him contemplatively. Alec felt like he was meeting a girl’s over-protective father for the first time.

“What about it?”

Alec grimaced. “I don’t really- I don’t know what to do.”

“About what?” Raphael asked, voice dropping slightly in tone. Alec had never felt so intimidated by his best friend in all his life.

“About it, y’know. Being with him, I don’t-”

Alec froze, realising his mistake.

Raphael reacted immediately. “Being with him?” he demanded.

Alec glanced over to Ragnor and Izzy in panic but Izzy was clearly distracting him rather well.

“Shit! Okay, yes, being with him. We’re… we’re together, okay?”

Raphael glowered at him. “No it is not _okay,_ Alec! Why wouldn’t you tell me?”

Alec grit his teeth. “He wants to keep in private, _because_ of what happened with Camille and that Will guy!”

Raphael immediately seemed to calm down. “Fucking Simon”, he groaned under his breath. After a second, he nodded slowly and the way he looked at Alec was almost as though he was seeing him for the first time. “So… what did you mean you don’t know what do to about it?”

Alec blinked in surprise at how quickly Raphael switched. “I just… I don’t know, man. I feel like now I have to be ten times as careful with him and with keeping us a secret and I know it’s wrong but I don’t know how I’m supposed to treat him now, y’know?”

For a moment Raphael looked ready to punch him but somehow, he took a breath and calmed down. Alec was grateful.

“Do _not_ treat him any differently Alec or he’ll just regret telling you.”

Alec sighed in frustration. “But he basically admitted that his confidence with me has been a show this entire time.”

Raphael shook his head furiously. “It’s not a show, not like that. Magnus really _is_ a confident guy Alec, it’s who he is. However, he’s always a little more cautious, nervous, around _guys_ he likes. That doesn’t mean he is tricking you with how he acts around you. It just means that he is gonna be real scared about where to go with this, coming out to those around him, y’know?”

“Our friends would never-”

“-Doesn’t matter”, Raphael insisted. “It’s an irrational fear for him. After that night he dumped Will and it was only a couple of months later that I turned 18 and we were able to get out of that town.”

Alec looked saddened. “He broke up with him?”

Raphael nodded solemnly. “He was in love with him too. That’s who he was talking about the other night during that drinking game, whatever the fuck that was.” After a moment of silence, Raphael laughed humourlessly. “Maybe I shouldn’t be telling you this.”

“No!” Alec cried impulsively. That drew the attention of Ragnor, who raised an eyebrow at him. Alec simply shook his head. Turning back to Raphael, Alec decided to whisper. “I want to know this. I want to understand… and- and I think I do, now.”

Raphael looked vaguely sceptical. “Don’t hurt him, Alec.”

Alec nodded desperately. “That’s the last thing I wanna do.”

There was a pregnant pause between them before Raphael cracked a smile. “I’m not sure who to give the ‘if you hurt him I’ll kill you’ talk. My best friend or my almost-brother?”

Alec smirked despite himself. “The brother”, he joked. “Magnus is an assshole to me, go teach him a lesson.”

Raphael snorted. “He probably is.”

When the four of them returned back inside, Alec reclaimed his seat beside Magnus. Ignoring the racing of his heart, he reached across himself under the table and lightly grazed his hand across Magnus’ knee.

Magnus broke off his speech for a moment and stared at Alec in surprise. To save face he quickly looked away and continued with whatever story he was sharing but he did reach under the table and clasp Alec’s hand in his. Alec resisted the urge to rest his head against Magnus’ surprisingly inviting shoulder and settled for simply laughing at his story and sending him the most affectionate looks he could muster.

 

…

 

“Stay here tonight”, Alec whispered insistently.

The pair were standing at the door of the RV, Magnus ready to leave and head across the parking lot towards his own bed. Everyone else had gone to bed hours ago but the two men had stayed up to chat quietly.

It was now 3am.

“Baby, where would I stay?”

Alec groaned quietly. “Don’t call me that!” he whispered dramatically.

Magnus grinned, stepping into Alec’s personal space. “What? Baby?”

Alec glared playfully at Magnus, allowing the older man to wrap his arms securely around his waist. Alec let his hands rest on Magnus’ neck, gradually pulling his boyfriend in for a kiss.

Before their lips touched, Magnus pulled away abruptly and grinned. Alec moaned in aggravation. “Seriously?”

“Oh, I’m very serious baby”, Magnus said daringly, putting emphasis on the final word.

The proximity and the tone of his voice made Alec drop his head to Magnus’ shoulder with a barely-there whimper. “Stop it, Mags.”

“Why? Why do you want me to stop?” Magnus’ voice was directly in Alec’s ear now, deep and throaty, sensual.

Alec moaned again, but not out of aggravation this time. Magnus grinned, leaning down slightly to graze his lips across the expanse of Alec’s neck. Alec shuddered in his arms.

“What is it about that word that makes you so weak in the knees, Alexander?” he asked hoarsely, voice rough.

Alec shook his head almost frantically. “I don’t know”, he whispered, panting slightly.

Magnus chuckled deeply and continued to pepper kisses across Alec’s neck. He let his tongue dart out briefly to lick across a small patch of skin under Alec’s ear and the resounding moan he received almost made him faint. Magnus tightened his grip around Alec’s waist, pulling him tighter against him.

“Magnus”, Alec whimpered pathetically.

Magnus withheld the moan attempting to tear its way out of his throat and instead began to lick and suck at a patch of skin just below Alec’s ear. Alec clutched onto his shoulders and groaned, tipping his head to the side in surrender. Magnus could not contain his moan this time and immediately stumbled forward until he had pressed Alec into the side of the RV.

Alec grunted in surprise at the impact before dropping his head back against the RV and allowing Magnus to duck down and suckle at his skin again. Alec moaned, fingers digging into the skin of Magnus’ shoulders, who grunted in return.

Unable to contain himself, Magnus let his hand wander down Alec’s back until it rested firmly on his thigh, just below his ass. Alec seemed to notice for he wiggled desperately in Magnus’ arms. Magnus chuckled at his boyfriend’s attempt and purposely lowered his hand to spite him. Alec groaned in frustration but the noise soon morphed into pleasure when Magnus bit at his collarbone.

Magnus wasted no time in pulling Alec’s thigh towards him and wrapping it firmly around his waist. Alec panted his name in response and pulled Magnus as close as he could.

“God, Magnus”, Alec whispered frantically, mouth opening and closing in response to the sensation of Magnus assaulting his neck.

“Alec”, Magnus moaned into his bare skin.

That seemed to trigger something in Alec for just seconds after, Magnus felt him tighten his hold on Magnus’ shoulders and before he knew it Alec’s other leg was wrapped around his waist. Magnus quickly caught Alec in his arms, hands resting on his ass as he pressed Alec even further into the RV in arousal at the move.

Alec chuckled and used his leverage to pull Magnus’ head from his neck and grab his face in his hands. Magnus looked up at his with dark eyes, pupils blown, and playfully squeezed the globes of his ass. Alec gasped and involuntarily ground back against Magnus’ hands, a move that pulled a laugh from Magnus.

Looking deep into his boyfriend’s eyes, Alec smiled. “Stay the night”, he pleaded again.

Magnus smirked. “There’s nowhere for me to stay. And if you want what I think you want, we would definitely need some private space”, he said before teasingly adding a “baby” on the end.

Alec glared but there was no heat behind it. “I’m not ready for… well, _that_ ”, Alec mumbled and was relieved when Magnus nodded in agreement. “But, I do really… _want_ you.”

Magnus dropped his head to Alec’s shoulder and groaned. “I want you too”, he sighed. “But we can’t do anything against the outside of an RV, in the middle of an empty parking lot.”

“Says who?” Alec teased. He stared directly into Magnus’ eyes before purposely rolling his hips.

Magnus groaned and drove Alec further into the side of the RV, plastering their hips together. He pointedly didn’t grind against him. “You’re such a bitch”, he grunted.

Alec grinned. “I know”, he whispered daringly before rolling his hips again.

“Alec”, Magnus moaned deeply. “Stop baby.”

Alec whimpered at the name and immediately his hips began to move again. Magnus tightened his grip on Alec’s ass and despite his own brain telling him otherwise, began to drive his hips into Alec’s.

At the initial contact, Alec threw his head back and gasped. Magnus quickly plastered his lips to Alec’s neck, sucking desperately at the skin as he thrust against the man in his arms.

“Magnus”, Alec cried out, digging his hands into Magnus’ hair and pushing him against his neck in encouragement. Magnus moaned into his neck. 

Magnus grunted at the exertion of holding Alec in his arms.. “Alec, you’re so beautiful”, he moaned, digging his fingers into Alec’s ass.

Alec shuddered, whimpering. “Oh, uh… Mag-Magnus we… we can’t, ughhh!”

Magnus groaned loudly at a particularly pleasant thrust and panted desperately into Alec’s neck. “Alec”, he said quietly.

Alec gasped. “Magnus!”

Magnus’ entire body reacted to Alec’s cry and the thrusting of his hips sped up. Alec cried out in surprise, hands tearing at Magnus’ hair as he gasped and moaned into Magnus’ ear. Magnus, hearing and feeling Alec’s arousal, was reminded of how stunning the man in his arms was. Moaning in response, he found himself unable to stop.

From the force of his movement, Alec found himself almost bouncing in Magnus’ arms. “Magnus! We can’t-”

“-You were the one that started this.”

Alec laughed breathlessly. “Me? I didn’t start flir- ah!- flirting with you!”

Magnus chuckled, hips growing frantic. “You were the one that wanted me to stay”, he grunted.

Alec nodded into Magnus’ neck, gasping. “I did, didn’t I?”

Magnus grinned. “You wanted this all along Alec, didn’t you?”

Alec was surprised when he didn’t tense at Magnus’ words. Instead, he nodded even more frantically. “Yes”, he gasped.

“Wanted me to do this, didn’t you? Wanted me to take you?”

Alec almost screamed when Magnus thrust his hips and grasped his ass at the same time. “God Magnus, yes! Don’t stop!”

“I won’t”, Magnus promised.

They only lasted a few more moments before they met their released, gasping into each other’s necks, Alec crying out as Magnus continued to whisper into his ear.

After a moment of panting desperately, Magnus slowly lowered Alec to his feet. Alec gasped when his knees gave out under him.

Magnus caught Alec in his arms with a laugh. “We should definitely think this through a little better next time”, Magnus teased.

Alec smiled. “Yeah, probably.”

There was a moment of silence before Magnus frowned slightly. “I promise that when we’re together properly it won’t be like that. It won’t be on the side of the fucking RV.”

Alec stared at Magnus in surprise before pulling him down for a brief kiss. “It’s okay”, Alec whispered against Magnus’ lips. “I wanted this. You think I cared about it being here when I initiated it?”

“I thought I did”, Magnus said jokingly, ignoring the tension in his shoulders.

Alec grinned. “I escalated it.”

Magnus nodded slowly. After a second he looked at Alec with desperate eyes. “So, that was okay? You don’t… y’know… regret it?”

Alec stared in shock at his boyfriend. In all the time they had spent together Alec had rarely seen Magnus nervous, let alone doubting himself. Alec made a point of staring deep into Magnus’ eyes when he spoke. “No. I do not regret what just happened. I loved it, okay?”

Magnus nodded but didn’t look entirely convinced.

“Do _you_ regret it? Are _you_ okay with what just happened?” Alec asked softly, remembering what Magnus had shared the previous night.

Magnus looked as though he was thinking for a moment and Alec felt his heart plummet. “I don’t regret it, Alec”, Magnus insisted. “It was a surprise and certainly wasn’t planned but I’d be a liar if I said I didn’t love every moment of it and, of course, want to do it again. But… maybe we should slow down a little on that front? At least until we can be alone and do it right.”

Alec nodded immediately. “That’s probably best. We could have been caught, in fact I’m surprised we weren’t.”

Magnus looked terrified at the thought. “That’s what happened with Will”, he said, a faraway look in his eyes.

Alec bit his lip. “Mags you know that no one here would ever judge you for being with me, right? They accept me, they’ll accept you. Plus, they all know you’re bi.”

“Camille knew I was bi too. But that only mattered as long as I was in a straight relationship; in her mind if I was with a woman then I became straight, if I was with a man I became gay.”

“Well that’s bullshit”, Alec growled. “You’re not half straight, half gay. You’re a whole person, an entire bisexual man. And if anyone here has a problem with you practicing your sexuality then they can go fuck themselves.”

Magnus stared at Alec in shock. “Alexander…” he whispered in surprise, unsure of what to say.

Alec simply stared back before leaning in to press a kiss to Magnus’ cheek. He lingered for a moment before pulling back. “I’m serious, Mags. No one here will care. Christ, Izzy and Clary are both bi and no one is angry with them. No one is _disgusted.”_

When Magnus didn’t respond, Alec grabbed his face gently and forced Magnus to meet his eyes. “ _I’m_ not disgusted, Mags. I don’t see you as a freak, I don’t see you as disgusting, I don’t see you as a sexual object I wanna have a threesome with.” At Magnus’ short-lived laugh, Alec smiled. “But seriously. I’m proud to say you want to be with me, bisexual or not.”

Magnus closed his eyes for a moment, basking in Alec’s words. He had never been so supported in his sexuality, even Will had had a hard time dealing with his attraction to women. Magnus took a deep breath before meeting Alec’s gaze.

“I must have done something pretty fucking brilliant in a past life to get someone like you, Alexander”, he sighed.

Alec’s eyes lit up at he smiled. “I’m pretty lucky too”, he said softly.

Magnus nodded, throat constricting slightly at how overwhelmed with affection he felt. “Thank you, darling.”

Alec kissed his cheek once more. “Always, Mags”, he whispered into the skin of Magnus’ cheek.

Magnus smiled.

  


  


  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That chapter was daunting to write considering what happens but HEY HO I hope you liked it! Let me know what you thought!! :D
> 
> Sneak peek of next chapter:  
> "Shit, Alec!"  
> Alec turned to Magnus in surprise. Magnus loosened his grip on Alec's arm and pulled him slightly closer, to which Alec raised an eyebrow in confusion.  
> "What?"  
> Magnus looked away slightly nervously. "I think I did some damage last night", he admitted with a small chuckle.  
> Alec immediately covered his neck with his hand, gasping. "Magnus!"


	12. Lets Make These 4 Weeks Count

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group have a peaceful day before reality sets in that they only have 4 weeks of their trip left. Clary takes it upon herself to make the most of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Make sure to read the end notes (there's a lot there XD)

 

 

* * *

 

Chapter 12

The next morning, after heading off to their respective RVs the night before, Magnus saw Alec again when returning to the Cat’s RV to drive. Like always, the rest of the RV were very much occupied with sleeping but Alec had always been an early riser and was more than prepared to meet Magnus when he arrived at barely 9:00am.

When he did, however, he did not get the greeting he expected.

Magnus had smiled at him in welcome just as Alec turned to make coffee but barely a second later, Magnus tugged him back with a cry.

"Shit, Alec!"

Alec turned to Magnus in surprise. Magnus loosened his grip on Alec's arm and pulled him slightly closer, to which Alec raised an eyebrow in confusion.

"What?"

Magnus looked away slightly nervously. "I think I did some damage last night", he admitted with a small chuckle.

Alec immediately covered his neck with his hand, gasping. "Magnus!" Magnus simply continued to laugh. “What am I supposed to do about it, Mags?”

Magnus shrugged. “I don’t know, my makeup is back in my RV so I can’t help you there”, he said simply, hand over his mouth to muffle his laughter.

Alec glared. “Well if we don’t cover it everyone finds out about us so which is it?”

Perhaps scaring Magnus into action wasn’t the correct thing to do but the look on Magnus’ face clearly showed Alec that he didn’t quite like the aforementioned idea. Quickly, Magnus sprung into movement, tearing the thin, sheer scarf he was wearing off of his neck and draping it across Alec’s.

Ignoring the almost overwhelming smell of Magnus, Alec rolled his eyes. “Really?”

“Yes, really!” Magnus grinned. “If anyone asks just say you… got cold.”

“It’s over 80 degrees Magnus”, Alec groaned in frustration.

Magnus shrugged and went back to starting up the RV, ready to follow behind Catarina who was no doubt driving around a RV full of sleeping inhabitants just like Magnus was.

Alec dropped himself into the seat beside him, resting his feet on the dashboard.

For the next hour or so, they shared tantalizing conversation about anything and everything, although Magnus seemed eager to talk solely about what had happened the previous night. Alec had finally, after much effort, managed to deter Magnus from that path of conversation.

At around 10:30, Raphael, as per usual, was the first besides Alec to get up. He immediately came to the front and held onto the back of Alec’s seat for stability.

“So”, he began tiredly. “’Why were up late last night, Raphael?’”

Alec turned to Raphael with a raised eyebrow; had his friend finally gone insane?

“Oh why do you think!” Raphael growled, yanking the scarf from around Alec’s neck.

Alec choked as the scarf was torn from him and he glared at Raphael in surprise. Magnus looked across at them in alarm and when he figured out what Raphael was angry about, he paled and looked away.

“THIS!”

Alec batted away Raphael’s intrusive hands and ignored the look of disgust his best friend gave him when the marks across his neck were bared.

“’Oh we’ll have to do it properly some other time’”, Raphael said mockingly, clearly attempting to talk like Magnus. “’Oh Magnus, I’m surprised we didn’t get caught!’”

Alec immediately looked away and ducked his head in embarrassment.

Raphael leant closely towards Alec and glared. “Yeah, you got caught asshole!”

Casting his gaze over to Magnus and seeing the obvious horror and fear on his face, Alec spun to face Raphael with a new found confidence. “Well then you would have heard Magnus say how he wasn’t ready for people to know, Jackass!” he hissed venomously under his breath.

Raphael looked over seemed to notice Magnus’ discomfort and tensed. He quickly patted Magnus’ shoulder in a lame attempt at an apology. “It’s cool, Magnus. Just… keep it down next time?”

With far less energy than he had greeted them with, Raphael retreated awkwardly. Alec had never seen him run away with his tail between his legs but boy was it an overdue sight.

Alec rested his hand atop of Magnus’ knee. “You okay, Mags?”

Magnus’ eyes were wide and alert and he was evidently tense. Alec could tell that he was attempting to hide the fear rocketing through his veins but was failing epically.

“Hey, Mags. It’s okay, he’s okay with it”, Alec attempted to reassure but Magnus did little to respond.

After a few moments they pulled up at a red light. Magnus slowly turned to look at Alec and nodded extremely slowly, face haunted with what Alec knew were no doubt memories of Camille.

“I’m okay”, Magnus insisted. Alec tried to hide his sympathy as he gently stroked his boyfriend’s knee. “Honestly”, Magnus continued, “He’s okay with it. It’s-it’s totally fine.”

Alec knew when Magnus was lying; he prided himself on being one of very few people on this trip able to know Magnus’ feelings without even looking at him. Despite that, Alec simply nodded and decided the best way to calm Magnus down would be by distracting him.

 

…

 

That day they continued to drive until Clary had spotted a nearby park and had called Magnus to request they pull over and relax for a while. Alec, having answered the phone and knowing how wound up Magnus was, agreed immediately.

Exiting the parked RV, Magnus caught sight of Raphael again and hastily looked down at his feet. He knew deep down that no one here was judging him but for all he knew, they may start to if they found out. While Raphael was showing no immediate signs of disgust or disappointment, he could easily flip just as Camille did.

He miraculously allowed Alexander to guide him with a gently grip on his elbow but other than that refused to have contact with him. He knew that if would likely hurt or insult Alec but that, out of care for Magnus, he wouldn’t say anything.

Not long after they arrived the group found a nice spot to sit. They were sitting just in front of the bed of a small lake, lounging happily on a blanket while Clary sketched. The conversation was lacking but the peaceful silence more than made up for it.

Alec had taken his place beside Magnus and over the short time they had spent laying in the sunlight he had subconsciously begun to move into Magnus’ arms. After last night he was desperate to be wrapped in his boyfriend’s presence and no one could blame him for they hadn’t been given such a luxury the night before. Magnus seemed to not care and as the minutes passed and the tension dropped from his shoulders, he began to wrap his arms around Alec.

After a short while Alec noticed Jace staring and in that moment Alec realised how close they had grown. Alec was virtually resting his head on Magnus’ chest, pressed up against his side and Magnus’ arm was draped across him, drawing soft patterns into his skin with his fingers. The look Alec sent Jace was of surprise and desperation. Jace must have understood for he didn’t comment on their position, despite his no doubt strong desire to mock them.

“Where to next? We’ve only got a couple more weeks on the road guys”, Izzy piped up from where she was standing, plucking flowers and tying them together.

Clary looked shocked. “Weeks?”

Izzy appeared to avoid looking at Clarissa but nodded nonetheless. “We’ve been on this trip for just over 3 weeks. We’ve only got about 5 left before _Pandemonium_ opens up again.”

“Me and Alec could _only_ book off a total of 8 weeks so Izzy’s right”, Raphael piped up.

Clary looked saddened but nodded reluctantly. “I forgot about that. Since I work whatever hours I want I sort of forget that you guys don’t.”

“That’s because you’re an artist Clary”, Jace said, not unkindly. “You can do art anywhere, anytime.”

“Plus you make a mint”, Simon mumbled under his breath teasingly.

Clary rolled her eyes. “I know! I’m just bummed out, that’s all. I can’t believe it’s been over a month.”

Alec sat up slowly, moving away from Magnus slightly when Clary turned to watch him. He smiled softly at her. “Izzy’s right though Clary. Think about it; our first week we went to the museum. Then I was ill almost the entire second week, then the beach and all the madness after that, then the next week we went to the Grand Canyon. It’ll have been 4 weeks in… 4 days.”

Clary nodded in understanding. “It just a shame, that’s all.”

“Not really”, Magnus said cheerfully as he sat up too. “We all live in LA, biscuit, we’ll see each other again.”

“Biscuit?” Clary asked in disbelief.

Magnus smirked at her. “Would you prefer gingerbread?”

Alec laughed and lightly smacked Magnus’ shoulder. “Don’t be rude”, he chastised playfully.

Magnus scoffed. “Who are you? My mother?”

“No”, Alec grinned. “But I do happen to know where you keep your hair gel and I’m sure at some point we’ll stop somewhere that sells dye.”

“Oh please!” Magnus chortled. “Do it! I love dying my hair, darling, and I would have no problem with a few streaks of illuminous pink.”

Alec rolled his eyes. “Who said it would be illuminous? Maybe it’ll be pastel pink?”

Magnus glared; Alexander knew of his hate for pastel colours- they simple weren’t bright enough. “Try me Gideon.”

Jace scoffed from beside Alec and put his thumb up to Magnus. “Yes!” he cheered. “He hates that.”

Almost as though to prove Jace right, Alec glared at Magnus. “You’re a dick”, he growled harmlessly.

Magnus slapped his hand over his mouth in fake surprise. “Alexander! You want my dick?”

This time, Jace’s laughter was louder and yet even that was almost inaudible behind Izzy and Clary’s giggling. Raphael and Cat spared a grin and Simon chuckled. Ragnor, as was expected, rolled his eyes.

“I hate you”, Alec mumbled and turned away onto his side.

Izzy laughed. “Oh Magnus! Did you hear that? He hates you!”

Magnus nodded, the same look of faux shock on his face, this time accompanied with hurt. “Oh I heard Isabelle and I am very much heartbroken at this revelation.”

Alec grinned into the blanket below him and shook his head vehemently. “Shut up”, he grumbled into the material.

“How rude!” Jace teased.

Alec gave him the finger in response.

This time, Raphael actually joined in on the laughter. “Lover’s quarrel, eh Magnus?”

Magnus looked up at Raphael instantly and from the look in his eyes Magnus could tell that Raphael was attempting to apologise for earlier, or perhaps he was just attempting to show Magnus that he would treat him no differently. Magnus was grateful but found it did little to ease the racing of his heart.

“Yes, indeed”, he said, void of any true enthusiasm. “Alec, if you didn’t know, is a terrible boyfriend.”

Alec could tell from the tone of Magnus’ voice that he was terrified and Alec hoped for his sake that the group would take Magnus’ words to mean exactly what he intended them to be; a joke.

It appeared they did for everyone laughed, some voicing agreement.

“He’s a terrible kisser Magnus, just a warning”, Raphael called from across the group.

Magnus smiled, the action feeling less forced now. “He’s such a bad boyfriend he hasn’t even granted me that pleasure yet Raphael.”

“Prude!” Alec heard Simon shout. He did his best to roll his eyes despite them being closed.

“You’re all asshole and I hate all of you”, Alec hissed, turning to them to say his piece before turning back, laying on his front and burying his head in his arms.

He yelped in surprise and leapt up when he felt a hand come down on his ass. Protecting said area as best as he could, Alec turned to the group in shock.

“What? I couldn’t resist”, Jace cackled.

Alec momentarily relaxed before swatting Jace around the head. Much like two days before at the canyon, Jace squealed and protected himself with his hands.

“Aaaand the gay porno returns”, Magnus said loudly, unashamed of the attention his words garnered from the surrounding families.

Izzy quickly reached across to high-five him. “He’s a keeper, Alec!”

Alec moved across the circle and dropped down beside Raphael, glaring at Jace the entire way. There was no heat behind it and Jace knew he was joking for the blond simply continued to laugh.

“Then remember to keep him, Iz”, Alec said good-naturedly.

Izzy grinned. “Hear that Magnus? You’re all mine!”

“He’s none of yours”, Catarina giggled. “I’ve known him longer.”

Raphael rolled his eyes light-heartedly. “And I’ve known him _longest_ so technically that means he’s mine.”

Magnus tossed his head back as he voiced his amusement. “You people are something else”, he said happily.

Clary beamed and laced her arm through his. “Yes, we _are_ ”, she agreed.

 

…

 

Clary appeared to have a newfound thirst for adventure when they returned to the RVs and immediately demanded they begin a list. She argued that no, it wasn’t a bucket list because those were silly, but that was essentially what it was. Protesting that their plan had led them nowhere (they were still in the west after all), Clary plotted out a new route that she claimed would get them maximum entertainment in the little time they had left. Most of the group left her to it.

They were all sat in Magnus’ RV, the larger of the two, some sitting at the table with Clary and some sitting on the couch just across the RV from them. Alec, Simon and Magnus were sitting around Clary, watching in amusement as she plotted out their next 4 weeks.

“Hang on, you wanna get to Georgia in two days?!” Simon gasped.

Alec sat up and gaped at Clary. “That’s like 1800 miles!”

Clary rolled her eyes. “Calm down! If we drive for the next two days we’ll get there easily.”

Izzy came to join them from her place on the couch. She read Clary’s list before setting it down with a giggle. “It’s doable boys. Quite easily in fact. But why do you want to go to Georgia of all places?”

“You’ll see! I have a whole 2 days planned there, then we move on to Florida for 3 then new York for 4”, Clary cheered, evidently proud of herself.

Magnus beamed. “I look forward to these next few weeks, biscuit!”

 

 

…

 

They set off towards Georgia the next day, on a Friday. They were hoping to late Sunday.

Throughout the Friday, Alec couldn’t help but become increasingly bored. Magnus insisted that the days they would spend in Georgia would be worth the wait but Alec was almost unconvinced; driving for hours was unbearable, especially in the heat.

By dinner on Friday night, the group had finally stopped moving for the day. Due to Clary’s plans not being exceptionally cost effective, they had decided to spend very little on dinner for the next few days and had all bought cheap convenience store meals for themselves. The fact that they had parked in a parking lot not far from a small park and meadow meant that the group had begun to split off and look around. Izzy, Simon, Raphael and Ragnor had decided to stay behind, insisting on finishing the remaining bottle or two of Vodka from their adventures a couple of days prior. Cat and Clary had decided to head to the park down the street, ignoring Magnus’ warnings and insisting that parks were even more enjoyable late at night.

Which left Magnus, Alec and Jace to walk around the surrounding land.

Alec couldn’t say he was annoyed to not be alone with Magnus but he would have preferred a peaceful stroll with his boyfriend. Admittedly, Jace was likely aware of their closeness due to spotting them at the park the previous day but Magnus was hardly aware of that and Jace and Alec hadn’t spoken about it as of yet. Jace had decided to link his arm through Alec’s in order to make Magnus seemingly more comfortable with doing the same. Alec was grateful for he knew Magnus wanted to hold Alec’s hand but would have forced himself not to were it not for Jace.

They walked for a while in silence, Alec leaning heavily on Magnus but humouring Jace by tightly linking their arms and therefore dragging the blond along. Magnus was cautious, that much Alec could see, but he seemed to relax every time either of the Lightwood boys smiled at him.  

“Has Clary told you what we’re doing in Georgia yet?” Jace asked eventually, breaking the silence between them.

Magnus chuckled slightly. “No. Biscuit is keeping that a heavily guarded secret”, he said quietly.

Alec nodded. “She’s gone insane now that she knows we’re halfway through”, he laughed softly, careful to not break the peace around them.

Jace smiled somewhat strained and Alec noticed. He turned to his best friend and for a moment he felt slightly guilty. It had been less than two weeks since the breakup and almost everyone, in their attempts to distract Jace, had forgotten to ask how he was.

“How are you? With Clary?”

Alec pulled away from Magnus’ shoulder and stared at his boyfriend in disbelief. Somehow he must have read Alec’s mind and beat him to it.

Jace tightened his grip on Alec just slightly and he nodded. “It’s okay. We’ve spoken a little bit, even sat down for a proper conversation about everything at that concert last week but nothing substantial since.”

Alec frowned; so the last time they had spoken was 9 days ago?

“How are you feeling about it now?” he asked.

Jace looked to his brother and smiled in reassurance. “I’m okay, Alec. It’s weird; I felt like I wouldn’t be this okay with everything considering how long we were together but…. I don’t know. Maybe I knew it was ending for a while.”

Alec believed him, he did, but that didn’t stop him from worrying. “I’m here, man.”

Jace looked at Alec affectionately and knew what Alec was offering. After years together Alec recognised the nod Jace gave him as a silent ‘thank you’.

Magnus looked between them and chuckled. “If you two weren’t related I would’ve sworn you were together.”

Jace cringed. “How many times do I have to say it until you all understand; I’m straight.”

Alec laughed and unlinked their arms to pat Jace’s shoulder gently. They didn’t relink their arms and Alec was grateful when Magnus didn’t seem to care and kept their hands interlocked regardless.

“I heard you the first time, you just tend to share homoerotic tension with a lot of the people on this trip- not me or Alec of course.”

Jace raised an eyebrow at Magnus. “So you mean Ragnor, Raphael and Si?”

At Magnus’ leer, Jace faked a gag. “You’re gross, man. I don’t know what Alec sees in you.”

His teasing grin immediately calmed Magnus down and just as Magnus went to speak, Jace sprinted off into the trees with a shout. Alec was unsure what he had spotted but it was clearly something of interest.

Taking the moment alone as an opportunity, Alec quickly pulled Magnus to a stop. Before Magnus could speak, Alec had captured his lips in a desperate, dirty kiss. Magnus responded eagerly.

After a good minute or two the pair separated, panting heavily and gasping. Alec smiled despite his lack of breath, “I haven’t gotten the chance to kiss you since Wednesday night.”

“And after such a scandalous night you were just desperate for my lips again?” Magnus teased.

Alec smiled but the look he gave Magnus was incredibly serious. “Yes.” Magnus slowly grinned in response. “Yes”, Alec repeated. “I was desperate for your lips again. After Wednesday night…”

Alec trailed off, unsure how to put into words what he felt.

Magnus nodded. “I know, dear, I know. Me too.”

Alec wasn’t sure how but Magnus, somehow, always seemed to know what Alec was thinking. It wasn’t a bad thing- far from it.

“Good”, Alec mumbled before pressing another kiss to Magnus’ all too inviting lips.

Magnus responded eagerly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These past two chapters have come out late and I'm sorry for that. I'm not getting bored or giving up on the story or anything it's just that my sister was rushed to hospital yesterday so I was... a bit busy. Again sorry, but I had to leave pretty quickly and drive for over an hour to be by her side so there was no chapter yesterday.
> 
> Either way I hope you enjoyed this chapter. The second half of the story is soon beginning with the final four weeks of their trip left. For those of you who may be confused with the days and how the weeks have passed, read this (it's a summary of each day so far):
> 
> Week 1  
> Monday: Meet and leave  
> Tuesday: Museum  
> Wednesday - Saturday: Nothing explicitly documented/ mainly driving (mentioned at beginning of chapter 6)  
> Sunday: Magnus/Izzy sleepover (Malec first kiss)
> 
> Week 2  
> Monday-Saturday: Alec is ill  
> Sunday: Nothing documented, mainly driving
> 
> Week 3  
> Monday: Beach  
> Tuesday: Amusement Park  
> Wednesday: Concert  
> Thursday: Driving  
> Friday: 2nd museum  
> Saturday: Leave Oregon, enter Nevada  
> Sunday: Driving 
> 
> Week 4  
> Monday: Driving  
> Tuesday: Grand Canyon (+drinking)  
> Wednesday: Malec first sexual encounter  
> Thursday: Park/day this chapter takes place in
> 
> Hope that clears it up a little, whether you forgot some mentions or perhaps I didn't make them clear enough that is the general schedule. Also, all of the days mentioned in week 3 are mentioned in Chapter 10.
> 
> So, thank you for reading and I hope you guys don't hate me for this upload being a day late.  
> Let me know what you think :D 
> 
> (Also, we've only got around 5-10 chapters left of this story and so I'm really interested in what you guys would want next. So, feel free to send me some prompt to fill the time between the end of this story and the start of my next or follow me on tumblr and send me whatever ideas you want to see for the next story OR if you want a possible sequel to this :D)


	13. Over SEX?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group arrive in Georgia and a misunderstanding succeeds in tearing Malec apart.

 

 

 

* * *

 

Chapter 13

The somehow managed to follow Clarissa’ schedule and get to Georgia by late Sunday. They found a small hotel not too far from where Clary insisted they were spending their first day.

“We’re near Six Flags”, Alec whispered as they pulled up to their hotel. “I bet she’s dragging us there.”

Magnus grinned. “Oh, you think? Interesting…”

“Shut up”, Alec chuckled. He gently grabbed Magnus’ hand and began to drag him out of the RV.

When they got outside, Alec dropped Magnus’ hand and instead settled for standing close beside him. The group were discussing rooming, and Alec didn’t exactly feel that he had much to contribute to the discussion.

Magnus, on the other hand, was more than willing to add his two cents; if they were being paired in rooms then it was only fair that Magnus room with Alexander… as they were friends, of course.

Izzy appeared to be making the decisions so Magnus attempted to ignore the conversation for he knew that Izzy wasn’t stupid; out of everyone, including Magnus and Alec themselves, she had noticed the tension between them the most.

“Okay so, we should avoid putting couples together, right?”

Raphael looked beyond pissed at Catarina’s idea. “Why the hell would we do that?”

Catarina glared at him. “There’s 9 of us, and we can only afford 3 rooms _max._ So, we can’t exactly put couples together just so they can get it on and leave the 3rd wheel to 3rd wheel?”

Magnus grinned but could without a doubt understand why Raphael was upset. No one else in the group was in a public relationship so it wasn’t going to affect them but it sure as hell would affect Raphael and Simon.

“Like we’d have sex with you guys around”, Simon scoffed.

Izzy giggled sweetly. “Sorry Si, we’ve made the rules, now follow them.”

Simon groaned, dropping his head to Raphael’s shoulder to bury his face in his neck. Raphael’s glare did not lessen, even as he wrapped his arms around Simon and drew him closer.

 _God they’re a weird pairing,_ Magnus couldn’t help but think.

“Okay, so that’s settled, yeah?”

Magnus blinked in surprise, refocusing his attention on the discussion that had somehow passed him in the blink of an eye. He looked at Alec for guidance but it appeared his boyfriend was too busy looking nervously at his feet, cheeks stained pink.

“Wait! What? Who’s where?”

Izzy looked up at Magnus and smiled almost unnoticeably. “Jace, Raphael and Ragnor will share one room. Clary, Cat and Simon will share the other. Which leaves me, you and Alec.” The look she gave Magnus when saying her brother’s name, slightly drawn out he might had, was teasing and soft.

Magnus took a moment to be confused. The youngest Lightwood raised her eyebrow and jerked her head towards her brother in as subtle a motion as she could manage. Magnus was still confused.

What did it matter that Ale-

_Oh._

_Oooh._

Magnus hid his shock well and managed to subdue the panic that settled over him. He could see Raphael’s glare and the way he opened his mouth suggested he was ready to protest but Izzy quickly silenced him with a stern look.

Magnus had no idea was Isabelle was planning but if it was what he thought it was then that would explain Alexander’s blush.

 

…

 

They all went to dinner at a bar down the street, ordering what was Jace’s 4th burger in the past 7 days (he had a tendency to snatch up microwavable burgers from almost every supermarket they passed).

It was a nice evening, rather peaceful considering how busy the bar was. Izzy had taken the opportunity to corner Magnus and make clear her intentions of “accidently falling asleep” in Cat and Clary’s room later that evening. God knows what Alec must have told her in order to convince her they needed a night alone.

Magnus had obviously protested that Simon and Raphael weren’t allowed to share but Izzy had defended her idea, arguing that they shared a room every night. Alec and Magnus did not.

It had been weeks since their first kiss. Weeks. Over 3 to be exact. And it had almost been an entire week since there… experience against the side of the RV.

Since that night they had not only grown incredibly close emotionally but physically they had become inseparable. Alec always found himself grasping for Magnus’ arm or hand and Magnus was known for initiating secret make outs sessions after the others went to bed. Both men wanted to spend some time alone and while Magnus was unsure what the night would bring, he knew that whatever happened the pair would be appreciative of having some time alone together.

“Do you not see the way you look at him?”

Magnus turned back around to face Izzy and furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.

Izzy sighed and nodded towards Alec who was currently playing pool with a very uncoordinated Clary Fairchild. His head was thrown back in laughter as Clary swatted at him, smile firmly in place, berating him for teasing her for her inability to play.

He looked stunning. It was common knowledge that the best smiles in the world were the ones that lit up your entire face and it was no less true for Alexander. His smile was wide, genuine and made his eyes sparkle in a way that Magnus had never seen. Perhaps it was Alec’s Greek-God-like beauty or just his radiant personality but the way he smiled perfectly captured the attention of almost the entire room.

“How do I look at him then, Iz?”

Izzy looked away from her brother, eyes soft and affectionate. When she met Magnus’ gaze there was a hint of mischief in her eyes. “I’m not telling you”, she insisted. “You’ll figure it out.”

Magnus rolled his eyes. “You’re tough to work with, Isabelle Lightwood!”

Izzy basked in his attention and fluttered her eyes playfully. “I know”, she giggled.

When Magnus returned his gaze to Alexander, they immediately narrowed.

A man, no older than Magnus, was approaching Alec. He looked slightly taller than Alec and was slim but obviously toned. His arms were thick with muscle and his stupid wife beater was tightly wrapped around his chest. His face was sharp but also soft and if he didn’t take his stupidly bright blue eyes off of Alexander’s ass then Magnus was gonna break his model-like face.

Alec was completely oblivious, as per usual, and continued his game with Clary. As the Ambercrombie wannabe drew closer to him, Clary straightened up and nodded towards him. That appeared to gain Alec’s attention and he immediately spun and was suddenly face to face with his pursuer.

Magnus watched in disgust as the man in question shamelessly looked Alec up and down, lip caught between his teeth and eyes dark with what was poorly concealed desire. Even Clary was cowering and she wasn’t even the one subjected to his powerful gaze.

Magnus was somewhat proud of how Alec didn’t appear to cower away from the man’s gaze but the pride was soon replaced by anger when he saw that Alec’s calm response only seemed to entice the man further. Knowing that he couldn’t interfere for fear of outing their relationship, Magnus settled back and watched. He trusted Alec to turn him away.

Izzy grunted in disapproval when the man slunk closer to Alec and almost cornered him. Now, Alec’s face was twisted with discomfort and he had begun to turn his body away as much as possible. The pool table was up against the wall, stupid as the placement was, and that meant that Alec was easily cornered until his back was pressed firmly against the periwinkle painted wall.

Magnus attempted to kill the man with his glare but it seemed that by reacting to it, Magnus had instead fuelled it. The man now ran his fingers across Alec’s chest softly, pinching the material between his fingers momentarily. Alec was clearly uncomfortable and stuttered pathetically as he attempted to turn away. His pursuer made that impossible and simply pressed up against him.

Whatever the man was slaying was clearly vulgar for Magnus saw the blush he was all too familiar with light up Alec’s cheeks. The man looked pleased at that and made a point of slowly brushing some of Alec’s hair behind his ear. Alec froze, body rigid with tension.

“Screw this”, Izzy grumbled angrily. Magnus watched her leave her seat, storming towards her brother and the blonde model who was clearly harassing him.

Magnus shouldn’t have smiled, but he did, when whatever few words Izzy said was enough to make Alec’s wannabe suiter turn around and flee with haste. Alec immediately slumped against the wall in relief but perked up when Izzy said something to him. Alec quickly responded and from the look on his face Magnus could tell he was getting defensive.

Eventually Izzy backed off and took Alec’s pool cue. She joined Clary at the pool table and quickly initiated a new game, leaving Alec to regain his composure.

Clary looked worried for him as Alec slowly made his way over to the bar, towards the rest of their group who seemed surprisingly unaware of what had happened.

As he approached, Alec caught Magnus’ eyes and almost as though a switch had been flicked, he smiled. Magnus felt a little flutter in his stomach as Alexander approached.

Instead of stopping and talking, Alec simply grabbed Magnus’ hand and pulled him from his bar stool. Without a word, Alec dragged Magnus in the direction of the restroom.

Magnus quickly looked around to ensure no one had seen them but it seemed only Izzy was aware of their departure. Deciding to enjoy, Magnus sped up until he was practically pushing Alec into the restroom.

Alec gasped in surprise when Magnus was the one to shove them into a stool. In the small, confined space Alec had nowhere to go and was powerless to stop his boyfriend as the distance between them was reduced. Magnus plastered his lips to Alec’s, hungrily responding to every move from Alec and responding in kind. They danced around each other until Alec could no longer handle it.

Pushing Magnus down onto the toilet lid, Alec grinned. Magnus made a sound of shock as he fell onto the seat but immediately his surprise turner to pleasure when he looked up and met Alec’s eyes. Alec looked so beautiful, eyes brim with desire and arousal.

“Well, well, well, Alexander; you sure know how to surprise a guy”, he muttered, slightly in awe of his boyfriend.

Magnus groaned at how sexy his boyfriend was when Alec swung his legs over Magnus’ hips and straddled him. Alec hastily drove his hands into Magnus’ hair, angling his head in for a kiss. Magnus moaned shamelessly against his boyfriend’s lips as their kiss drew more and more dirty. Alec responded in kind, tightening his grip on Magnus’ hair and pulling at the strands, drawing grunts and groans from the man below him.

Magnus let his hands fall to Alec’s waist, pulling him as close as possible. When Alec was pressed right up against Magnus’ chest, the younger man moaned as the sudden sensation of their crotches meeting.

Having never touched in such a way before, Alec grew overwhelmed. He dropped his hands from Magnus’ hands, gripping his shoulder’s instead, and tossed his head back in pleasure. Magnus gripped Alec’s ass tightly, drawing him closer. He dropped his head to Alec’s chest as he groaned.

“Do it”, Alec said breathlessly.

On any normal occasion, Magnus would have insisted they talk or would have at least double checked this was what Alec wanted but this time the desire in Alec’s eyes was too prominent to ignore and Magnus’ own resolve was waning.

With a nod of agreement, Magnus pulled Alec back in again, causing their crotches to grind against each other’s. Magnus cried out his pleasure and did it again.

Soon, their hips were moving in perfect symmetry, grinding and moving against one another, each movement punctured by a small, breathless ‘ _ah’_ from Alexander. Magnus basked in the sounds he could draw from Alec’s lips and simply held his boyfriend tighter, drawing their hips together more forcefully.

It lasted longer than before but still not more than a few minutes. The sensations almost overwhelmed Magnus as Alec ground backwards. When he began to grind his ass into Magnus’ crotch, Magnus almost lost it. Alec was shameless in his desire, moaning his approval as Magnus’ hardness rubbed against his ass.

For a few more moments, it was enough, but soon enough it became too little for Alec and he quickly pulled Magnus into a kiss. It was sloppy, dirty and everything that they needed in that moment. Magnus’ fingers dug deeply into the skin of Alec’s ass, even through his jeans.  Despite the material between them the contact was creating a familiar tugging sensation in Magnus’ stomach.

With one more breathless cry from Alec, they both reached their peak and their movements slowly grew to a stop.

Alec buried his face in Magnus’ neck, mumbling incomplete sentences into his skin. Magnus sighed, his eyes fluttering closed as he basked in the aftermath with Alec still wrapped in his arms.

“That was… so hot. _You_ taking _charge_? Taking what you want?” Magnus paused in his mutterings to groan. “So hot!”

Alec chuckled into Magnus’ neck. Pressing a small kiss to it, he pulled away and grinned at his boyfriend lovingly. “I try.”

Magnus smiled. “And you succeed”, he said.

Alec nodded and began to draw back from Magnus. Magnus seemed to disagree with the distance between them and quickly tugged Alec back towards him. At Alec’s look of confusion Magnus grinned sheepishly.

“Let’s stay here for a moment”, he begged.

Alec shook his head with a laugh. “We have to clean ourselves up silly.”

Magnus groaned but agreed.

 

…

 

By 9 o’clock, Clary had text him to inform them that Izzy had fallen asleep in their room. Magnus was surprised at her efficiency but didn’t waste any time before immediately tearing the book Alec was reading out of his hands, scooping the man into his arms with surprising ease and tossing him on the bed.

Alec gaped up at Magnus as he lay strewn across the bed sheets. Magnus grinned at him and quickly climbed on top of him, pulling him into a kiss.

If Magnus were to describe how Alec’s lips felt in any word he would perhaps choose addicting; the feel of having his boyfriend’s lips responding so perfectly to his own, caressing his in such a similarly loving way… well, it was overwhelming.

Alec knotted his hands back into Magnus’ hair and was once again successful in pulling a moan from the man’s lips. Alec chuckled under his breath before muttering something about a “kink”.

Magnus grumbled in response and began to kiss along Alec’s cheek. Pressing kisses into his eyes, temple, nose and cheeks, he showered Alec’s face with affection until the younger man giggled and turned his face away.

Magnus began to kiss down Alec’s collarbone, fingers tracing across the hem of his pants, toying with the belt buckle.

When Alec felt Magnus undo his belt, he immediately tensed. Magnus sensed his hesitation but appeared to misinterpret it as nerves and decided the best way to calm Alec was to draw him back into a kiss, hand creeping around his waist before he began to slip it down Alec’s pants, fingers dancing across his-

Alec he pulled away abruptly, snatching Magnus’ hand from within his pants. Magnus chuckled into his neck and linked her fingers together, once again misunderstanding Alec’s actions.

“Mags”, he mumbled nervously. Magnus remained unaware and instead of responding, peppered his neck with kisses. Alec grew slightly impatient. “Mags”, he said again, firmer this time.

Magnus pulled away with a grin. “What, baby?”

Alec resisted the urge to roll his eyes and quickly grabbed Magnus’ face to stop him when the older man leant in again. “We should… talk.”

Magnus froze.

There were very few reasons why Alec would want to talk and it was most likely about something to do with them, their relationship. Resisting the urge to both laugh and cry, Magnus straightened up and joined Alec in sitting cross-legged on the bed.

Alec was playing with his pants’ hem anxiously and Magnus felt himself tense all the more.

“I don’t know if we should do this”, Alec said quietly after a moment or two of silence.

Magnus could almost hear the sound of his heart shattering. Alec didn’t want to be with him, didn’t lo- want him. Magnus felt like his whole world had imploded and his breath caught, making his throat constrict and his entire body freeze.

“I just don’t think I’m ready for something like this yet”, Alec continued and as he did, his voice grew in volume and confidence. “Look, Mags-”

“-I get it”, Magnus interrupted. Despite the fierce pain in his chest, he attempted to smile reassuringly at his boyf- Alec.

Alec looked relieved and dropped his head to his hands with a quiet laugh. “Thank you”, he said sincerely. “For understanding- most guys would be so pissed right now.”

Magnus raised an eyebrow but when he met Alec’s eyes he felt tears prick at his own and had to look away. “Why would I be pissed? If this is what you really want…”

“Most guys would think that I’d be leading them on”, Alec sighed, looking down at his hands.

Magnus nodded slowly. Truth be told, he did feel like Alec had lead him on. For 3 weeks, no less.

“We never promised each other anything, Alexander.”

Alec nodded furiously. “No, I-I know that. It’s just with what happened earlier-”

Magnus thought back to just a couple of hours ago at the bar, holding Alec close to him as they both sought pleasure together, feeling as though Alec could never get close enough. It was painful to think that Alec had basked in that moment, only to turn away completely a few hours later. To turn away from him, from _them._

“It’s okay”, Magnus insisted, choked. Alec appeared to notice the tone of his voice and frowned to which Magnus quickly smiled reassuringly. “I hold nothing against you, Alec. Honestly.”

A grin slowly spread across Alec’s face and he nodded. Picking up Magnus’ hands, he brought them to his lips and kissed them gently. Magnus winced at the action, his heart clenching even more dangerously than before.

“Look, Alec. I’m… gonna go”, Magnus said after a pregnant pause. Alec looked distraught for a moment but Magnus just shook his head. “I’m really not angry. I just… need some time to…”

“Cool off?” Alec asked, laughing quietly. “You don’t have to be embarrassed Magnus.”

Magnus almost scowled at him; of course he felt embarrassed. Here he was almost in tears because Alexander was effectively breaking up with him and yet, there sat Alec, smiling and sighing in relief. Clearly their weeks together had been _really_ bad.

“Anyway”, Magnus muttered awkwardly. He slowly rose from the bed, manoeuvring gracelessly around his own limbs to ensure he didn’t touch Alec in any way. He nodded towards the door with a humourless chuckle. “I’ll… see you soon.”

Alec watched Magnus go and felt his own chest ache. Magnus seemed really upset.

Had he just lost Magnus forever?

Over _sex_?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So slightly misunderstanding there... I wonder what will happen next
> 
> Hope you guys enjoyed this chapter! Let me know what you thought :D


	14. Aku Akan Menunggumu

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Both Alec and Magnus are confused as to what happened last night and it seems that the rest of the group are too

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we are, chapter 14! It feels weird to be posting this chapter since I spent all of yesterday writing chapters so I'm several ahead.. why did I do that, you may ask. Well, next week I am on holiday (mon-fri) so I'm trying to catch back up with my writing so that I can still post the chapters for you but I want to warn you in advance that I may not be able to. I'm seriously going to try my best though, even if I have to smuggle my laptop on holiday with me. 
> 
> Anyway, enjoy this chapter! Lots and Lots of talkings :)

  


  


  


  


* * *

Chapter 14

Alec wasn’t sure how, but he wasn’t crying. He should have been, theoretically, but it appeared that he was too sad to bother shedding tears.

After their discussion in the hotel, Magnus hadn’t returned. Alec had somehow managed to contain his upset, considering it was one of their only available nights to share a bed. He had headed to bed alone, hoping that perhaps Magnus would return during the night. He had stayed up, eyes on the hotel room door until almost 4 o’clock, when exhaustion had forced his eyes closed.

Alec wasn’t entirely sure how he was feeling. Part of him was upset, heartbroken in fact, that Magnus had clearly relied so much on the physical parts of their relationship to see them through. It didn’t make sense, in Alec’s opinion, since they had only grown physical in the past week, but apparently no sex was a deal breaker for Magnus.

On the other hand, part of him was angry. So angry.

Magnus had waltzed into Alec’s life, made him feel such alarmingly strong emotions, teased him with the prospect of love and then walked away the second Alec wouldn’t put out? Of course, from the very beginning Magnus had been vocal about his appreciation for Alec’s appearance but never did Alec think that that was as far as Magnus’ affection stretched.

When one was left alone all night in silence, one has time to think. And Alec had thought, and thought and thought about what had happened. Perhaps Magnus was getting panicked about them being discovered and had leapt upon the quickest excuse he could to cover his tracks. Maybe he was starting to see how dangerous being with Alec was for him and whether or not he was worth it.

Apparently he wasn’t.

After very little sleep, barely 3 hours, Alec was woken up by Izzy slipping into the room. Upon seeing him, she beamed and her eyes were full of humour.

“Hey big bro. Sleep well?”

Her voice was light with amusement, eyes on Alec’s rumpled hair and swollen lips. Little did she know they weren’t swollen from someone’s lips, but rather from Alec’s own teeth.  

“Pretty badly”, he said honestly, eyes sunken.

Izzy raised an eyebrow and chuckled under her breath. “Wow. That bad?”

Alec ignored her teasing and instead began to draw back the covers. He was in desperate need of a shower.

“Hey! Woah!” Izzy cried, ducking away and shielding her eyes as Alec lowered the sheets.

Alec rolled his eyes. “I’m fully dressed, Iz.”

Izzy spun back around to face him and her mouth dropped open at the sight of a completely covered body. She frowned at Alec in confusion. “Okay”, she muttered. “It was _that_ bad? Really?”

Alec, growing annoyed with her words, turned to her with a glare. “What the hell are you talking about?”

Izzy stared at him as though he had grown a second head. “Oookayyyy, big bro. C’mon, where is he? Do I need to give him some sex tips?”

Slowly Alec managed to understand what Isabelle was rambling about and instantly felt his body go rigid. Shaking his head and heading towards the bathroom, he called behind him that Magnus wasn’t there.

Izzy followed behind him, completely unfazed as her brother drew his shirt over his head and began to wash his face.

“What do you mean he’s not here?”

Alec wiped his face with the towel, far harsher than recommended, hoping to wipe the dry tears from his cheeks.

“He’s just not”, he shrugged.

Isabelle looked both confused and disgruntled. “Explain”, she insisted with very little room for argument.

Alec groaned; he really wanted a shower. “Not now, Iz. I want a-”

“- Yes now!” Izzy cried, grabbing his arm and pulling him away from the shower.

Alec immediately tore his arm from her grasp, glaring. “What the hell?”

“Talk to me”, Izzy begged. The look in her eyes was panicked and sympathetic. “What happened?”

“Nothing happened”, he tried lamely, one more time.

Izzy set her hands on her hips and the look she gave him was alarmingly similar to the looks he would receive from their mother as a child.

“Fine”, he mumbled pathetically, caving under her stare. “We were… well…”

Izzy raised an eyebrow impatiently.

Alec shifted awkwardly, eyes firmly locked on his own feet. “We were…. Y’know… making out”, he looked up to see Izzy nod, unbothered by the idea of her brother being intimate with another man. “Well, we were kissing and Mangus he, er.. he reached for my pants and tried to- yknow.” Alec gestured wildly to the sweats he had worn to bed.

Izzy nodded again, weirdly patient.

“I stopped him and then said that, well, that I couldn’t be with him like that. A-and then he just… left.”

Alec looked up and watched his sister’s face distort in turmoil. “What do you mean “he left”? Left how?”

Alec shrugged. “He looked really upset and then he just left. He didn’t come back and… Iz, I think he hates me.”

“Why would he hate you?”

Alec shrugged helplessly. “I don’t know! For not sleeping with him?”

Izzy scoffed. That was nothing at all like the Magnus she knew and she prided herself on knowing him rather well. “No way. He would never-”

“-He didn’t come back, Iz.”

Izzy looked at her brother and allowed herself to take him in. His voice was hoarse and quiet in a way that made him sound hopeless and so heartbreakingly vulnerable. His eyes were red rimmed and showed obvious exhaustion and the devastation she saw within them was heartbreakingly familiar. Taking in his entire appearance and how he held himself with such heavy shoulders, she realised he wasn’t exaggerating.

For a moment she spared a thought to how both Lightwood siblings had somehow managed to fall in love with the wrong people. As soon as the thought came, she brushed it aside.

Wasting no more time, she walked over and took her older brother into her arms. While these moments were great because she finally felt useful and finally felt as though she were doing her job as a sister, they were also horrible because if there was anything in this world that could tear her heart in two, it was the sound of her older brother crying.

 

…

 

Within the hour, Izzy had left her older brother to himself, giving him time to change in peace. She had stayed while he showered and had affectionately picked out an outfit for him to wear that day. If there was any motto she lived by it was “if you look good, you feel good.”

It didn’t appear to work for Alec.

And so here she was, stalking down the hallways of their hotel, having just stopped by at Cat, Clary and Simon’s room, demanding to know where Magnus was. They had protested that they had no idea and before Catarina could voice her worry, Izzy had left and headed to the floor above to locate him.

Standing outside of Jace’s room, she took a deep breath to calm herself. After a moment, she finally pulled herself together enough to knock.

The door opened slowly after a moment or two and Jace poked his head out. When he saw her, he appeared to relax and Izzy only spared a second to think about who he had thought was on the other side.

“Where is he?”

Jace looked startled at her tone but didn’t hesitate to straighten himself up and open the door enough for her to see him fully.

“Who? Magnus?”

Izzy, knowing that were he not there Jace wouldn’t have assumed, pushed past her adoptive brother without a word and stormed into their hotel room. From the doorway she could see the beds; Ragnor was sitting on the edge of his, pulling boots on, and on the other was Raphael, laying down and mumbling to himself.

No, not to himself.

Ignoring Jace’s protest, Isabelle shot across the room and upon reaching Raphael’s bed, reached out and pulled the body from the sheets, hard enough to send them to the ground.

Magnus cried out in surprise, rolling onto his knees. He looked up in shock and when he met Izzy’s eyes, he looked terrified. Bringing himself to his feet, he almost cowered under her gaze.  

The fury in her eyes made everyone in the room tense.

“What the hell, Izzy!”

Izzy ignored Raphael completely, focusing her entire attention on Magnus.

“Who the fuck do you think you are?”

The entire room grew silent as Izzy growled at the man in front of her. Jace drew himself closer in order to mediate in some sort of way and Ragnor rose to his feet with haste, stepping closer to defend his friend.

Magnus’ eyes fell to the floor and his shoulders sunk pathetically.

“It wasn’t m-”

“What’s going on?” Jace demanded, gently touching his sister’s shoulder. He let out a displeased grunt when Isabelle tossed his hand off of her.

Izzy looked beyond upset. “Oh, I’ll tell you what’s going on!” The look in her eyes was somewhat manic as she continued. “This asshole right here decided to storm out and leave our brother in tears, all because he wouldn’t put out!”

Magnus looked up to stare at Izzy in shock but when he did, the eyes he met weren’t Izzy’s but rather Jace’s.

“You what?!” the blonde Lightwood growled.

Magnus stumbled back slightly, hands raised in surrender. Raphael and Ragnor immediately drew to his sides, however Raphael sent him a look that clearly demanded an explanation.

“Magnus”, Ragnor said quietly. “Explain.”

Magnus took a moment to look around the room and panic. Hang on… they all knew about him and Alec?

Sensing Magnus’ shock, Izzy drew closer. “Why the hell would you walk away from him like that?” she repeated.

Magnus met her eyes and furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. “What? I- he walked away from me first!”

Izzy looked infuriated. “You mean because he didn’t want your dick!?”

The entire room shifted and Jace appeared ready to lunge. Raphael stepped back from Magnus slightly, fire ablaze in his eyes. Ragnor did the opposite and drew closer, resting his hand on Magnus’ arm.

“Is this true?”

Magnus looked at Ragnor desperately. “It’s true that I walked out but Ale-”

“-You son of  bitch!”

The room burst into action, Raphael catching Jace in his arms and stumbling away, pulling at the blond with all of his power. Jace scratched angrily at Raphael’s arms, swinging his fists in the hopes they would make contact his Magnus’ face. Ragnor immediately jumped in front of Magnus in response and glared Jace down.

“Let him finish, meat head!”

Jace’s eyes darkened and were it not for Raphael’s waning grip, Ragnor was sure he would no longer have lips to speak with.

Turning back to Magnus, Ragnor’s frown returned. “Explain, Magnus.”

Magnus opened his mouth to do just that but was rudely interrupted by the hotel room door banging open once more. Stumbling into the room, Cat, Clary and Simon joined the group.

“What the hell is going on? We can hear shouting from downstairs” Catarina demanded, walking up to Izzy and glaring the Lightwood daughter down.

Simon immediately headed towards Jace and Raphael, putting a hand on the blonde’s shoulder in an attempt to calm him down. It appeared to work and Raphael loosened his grip on Jace slightly.

Clary stood back, looking between Jace and Isabelle was something akin to fear and shock.

“Magnus was just about to tell us”, Ragnor said firmly, his gaze stopping Izzy from interrupting.

Magnus sighed. “We were in the room… talking and Alec said that he couldn’t do this anymore, okay? Excuse me if I wanted to get out of there after being broken up with!”

Izzy stared him down for a moment, eyes slightly softer. Magnus watched as her face fell and felt relief for a moment. Almost as soon as it went, her anger returned.

“You liar!” she growled. “Alec said otherwise.”

“And why should we believe Alec over Magnus?”

Jace spun to stare at Cat in rage. “What the fuck are you trying to say?”

Raphael quickly stood in front of him and together, Raph and Simon managed to calm him down enough to get him to sit down.

Izzy stared at Magnus in what looked like betrayal. “He told a different story”, she said quietly, almost as though she had given up.

Magnus simply couldn’t face her disappointment. “What did he say differently?”

“Why don’t you tell me?” she said simply.

If there was anything that Magnus Bane had learnt about the Lightwoods in the past month he had travelled with them and the several weeks of working with Izzy prior to the trip, it was that they were fiercely loyal. And protective.

“I don’t see what difference it makes”, he said uncomfortably, looking around the room, begging that none of them would figure out what he was hiding.

Izzy laughed. “It makes all the difference.”

Magnus stared at her in fear, eyes wide and pleading. The look he received in return was stern.

Oh god, it was bad enough that apparently everyone knew about them but… knowing what they were doing? Magnus just wasn’t ready to say it, to face the inevitable looks of disgust that would no doubt be exchanged between them. He physically couldn’t watch them all turn against him for something like that.

That being said, it appeared they were all turning against him anyway and Izzy was clearly not afraid of telling them all her side of the story.

Bracing himself, he realised that the only way to have even the slightest chance of keeping them, was to accept their disgust.

“We were… together.”

Jace scoffed.

“Together?” Cat repeated, eyes narrowed.

Magnus felt his blood run cold. Not Catarina too.

“Y-yes… w-we... were, um…”

Ragnor tightened his grip on Magnus’ shoulder, squeezing it in an attempt to show Magnus his support. He knew what Magnus was going to say and what effect sharing that information would have on him.

Feeling grounded by the presence of Rangor, Magnus straightened up and looked Izzy directly in the eye with what little confidence he could muster.

“We were intimate.”

Magnus wasn’t sure what he expected but the looks of shock he received were not it. Looking around at his friends, no one appeared angry, no one appeared disgusted.

Except Jace and Izzy.

The look on Jace’s face was a look Magnus was all too familiar with. It was disgust as plain and strong as that which he had faced on that night almost 7 years ago. Manus prayed it was only there because the thought of his brother having sex repulsed Jace and not because the thought of two men did.

And Izzy? Izzy looked distraught and resentful.

“And he didn’t want to. Am I right?”

Her tone demanded a response and Magnus was hardly one to deny her. “I’m not sure”, he eventually admitted. “I assume not because he stopped me and told me he didn’t want to be together anymore.”

Izzy became quiet. She looked at the man that she had identified as one of her closest friends for the past month or so. She liked to imagine that she knew him well considering the time they had spent together but she knew deep down that she would always know and trust her big brother more.

“He said he wanted to break up?”

Magnus looked at Izzy and felt a surge of pride; she was so loyal and protective of her brother. Magnus almost wished he had that too.

“Not in so many words.”

Jace stood up, disgust now hidden behind confusion. “What do you mean? What did he say?”

Magnus winced; he’d rather not think about it, truth be told. “He said he wasn’t sure if he could do it, be with me that is. He said that he was sorry for leading me on.”

Jace took a deep breath, calming himself. The look on his face clearly reflected the confusion, upset and unadulterated anger that he felt below the surface. Izzy also relaxed but the anger on her face remained.

“I don’t understand”, Raphael eventually said. “You said he walked out because Alec wouldn’t have sex with him?”

Izzy turned to Raphael and nodded. “That’s what Alec told me”, she insisted. “He said that he stopped you, said he wasn’t ready and then watched as you walked away from him. He was a mess, thinking that you only wanted him for his body.”

Magnus stared in disbelief. “Wait, what? He thinks that?”

“Well you did walk out on him!”

Magnus shook his head vehemently. “Because he broke up with me!”

“You said he didn’t say that in so many words. So what did he say, exactly?” Catarina interrupted, stopping Izzy from growing too worked up.

Magnus shrugged. “I-I can’t remember! All I remember is him saying that he was sorry for leading me on and that he was sorry but that he couldn’t be with me anymore. He said that most guys would hate him for what he did.”

Izzy stepped up immediately. “Do you?”

“What?”

“Hate him.”

Magnus gaped at her. Surely she knew him better than that. “Of course not! I was upset, that’s why I left. He broke up with me, not the other way around.”

Izzy nodded slowly. “I’m gonna go talk to him.” At Magnus’ nod of approval, she reached across and stroked his cheek gently. “I’m sorry for barging in like that.”

The way she said it, soft and guilty, made Magnus frown. “It’s ok-” he cut himself off. Rephrasing he said, “I forgive you, Isabelle.”

Izzy sighed, sending him a soft smile before she left, Jace trailing behind her.

Raphael looked between the occupants of the room for a second before shrugging guiltily. “I have to… go check on him too. I-I.. I’m sorry, Magnus.”

Magnus simply nodded in understanding; he was Alec’s best friend, it was to be expected.

When Raphael left, door slamming behind him, Catarina stared him down.

“Tell me _exactly_ what happened.”

 

…

 

“He said that you broke up with him.”

Alec scoffed. Despite the anger coursing through his veins it was clear to everyone in the room that he was confused and the way his eyes watered slightly showed his obvious heartbreak.

“Why the hell would I break up with him? You don’t break up with people you-”

Jace raised an eyebrow. “People you what, Alec?”

Alec looked away speedily, biting his nails uncomfortably. Instead of answering, he looked back up at Izzy. “I swear, Iz. I didn’t break up with him, I just told him I couldn’t… _do that_.”

Raphael looked between Alec and Izzy, brow furrowed in concentration. “Do what?”

Alec stared at Raphael, as though he had forgotten he was there. A blush slowly crept up Alec’s neck as he shrugged awkwardly. “Sex”, he mumbled.

Raphael nodded. “Did you tell him that?”

Alec looked at him as though he were stupid. “Of course, that’s what we’re talk-”

“I mean did you make it clear that you were talking about the sex.”

Alec watched Raphael for a moment, lost in thought as he attempted to remember exactly what had been said the night before. His exhaustion got the better of him and he winced when he couldn’t remember.

“I’m… not entirely sure.”

Izzy raised an eyebrow at him.

“Shit!” Alec gasped. “Oh shit, what if he misunderstood?”

Raphael rolled his eyes in his usual fashion. “I think that he did, idiot.”

“Well fuck, Alec.”

 

…

 

Magnus loved Catarina. Sometimes he forgot just how amazing she really was and how much she cared for him. He was sure he would never know how, but she always managed to know exactly what he needed.

Not what he _wanted_ , but what he _needed_.

“Thank you”, he mumbled quietly.

Somehow the madwoman he called his best friend had managed to convince everyone to leave. Even Ragnor.

It wasn’t until the door closed behind them that Magnus realised how much he needed the peace in order to sort through the complete mess that was his mind.

“You okay?”

He looked up as Catarina approached and shuffled over to give her enough space to sit next to him on the bed. He made a point of ignoring her gaze, instead tracing the patterns of the cheap, tacky hotel sheets.

“Not gonna lie, I’ve been better”, he said humourlessly.

Catarina nodded. “I gathered.”

Magnus felt tears prick at his eyes. “I’m so confused Cat”, he admitted quietly.

Catarina, always one to know when Magnus was upset, turned to watch her best friend’s lip quiver. She didn’t say anything, scared he might retreat from the conversation, and instead watched him wipe at his eyes angrily.

“The first time since Will… that I open up to someone and… I don’t even know what happened back there!”

Cat quickly moved over to wrap her arms around him, cradling his head against her shoulder and kissing his cheek. She wasn’t sure why, but it always helped to calm him down and put a smile on his face.

This time, however, it just made him choke up again.

“Things were going so good, Cat. So damn good. I was-” he cut himself off for a moment in order to take a deep breath. “I was falling in love with him.”

Cat winced, hearing the sorrow laced in her friend’s tears. She tightened her hold on him and nodded. “I know you were, sweetie. I know.”

Magnus stuttered out a breath. “And- And now everyone knows about us? I’m- I’m not ready f-for that!”

“I know, Mags.”

Magnus groaned pathetically. “Don’t call me that please”, he cried, burying his face in her shoulder.

Magnus felt helpless and completely incapable of wrapping his mind around all the different emotions he was feeling. He was, first and foremost, in shock. In the moments last night before everything went to shit, he had never in his life felt happier than he had with Alec in his arms. He was on cloud nine.

And yet now, he felt like he had whiplash. Suddenly, everything had spiralled from good to bad, to even worse. Truth be told, he was scared to death of what had happened. The completely immobilising devastation he felt last night terrified him to his core, because never in his life had he felt such sorrow. Not even when he lost Will to his own stupid fears.

This, this was something he had never felt before. The entire situation was one he had never faced before but he had dived in head first, ready and desperate to let Alexander in. Desperate to not let his fears steal another love from him.

But now he didn’t know what to think. He of course understood that what occurred last night was probably a misunderstanding, and as vindictive as it was to think, he was almost happy that Alec was as distraught as him. Not because he liked to see Alexander in pain, but because it reminded him that his feelings weren’t unfounded.

Which made it even worse.

Had Alec truly thought that Magnus would leave him, purely because he wasn’t ready for sex? Did he really think that Magnus himself was ready for that?

Magnus hadn’t even kissed a guy since Will, which was over 7 years ago! But Alec had unlocked something in him, a will to fight for what he wanted, perhaps. Something about Alexander Lightwood had made Magnus decide that… “Screw everyone else, I want this”.

So, for Alec to turn around and think that Magnus only wanted him for his body, blatantly disregarding all that Magnus had told him, hurt. It really hurt.

Mind you, it didn’t quite compare to how it felt a couple of hours ago, when he was still convinced that the entire time Alec had been leading him on, whether for fun or for sex.

Disregarding that, knowing it to be untrue, he thought back to the rest of the situation. Even without those feelings of betrayal, there was still the gut wrenching reality that _everyone knew._

No one in the room had shown an ounce of surprise when Isabelle had stormed in, and not even those who showed up in the midst of it appeared shocked at the idea of Alec and Magnus being together. No one had seemed confused, no one had seemed anything but accepting.

But how did they all know?

Admittedly, Cat and Izzy knew, due to his own actions. He had forced himself to confide in Cat and Isabelle had found out because… well, how could either of them keep it from Izzy. Magnus certainly didn’t hold it against Alec; he knew that it was only fair that Alec have someone to talk to considering he had Catarina.

And, of course, Raphael had overheard them. Which was also something he had yet to come to terms with.

But how in the world did Ragnor, Clary, Simon and Jace know? Was it just a lucky guess or had Alec told them?

Would Alec do that to him?

“Penny for your thoughts.”

Magnus drew back and look at Cat solemnly. “What do I do now?”

Catarina sighed. “It’s up to you but I would talk to him. Alec.”

Magnus nodded. “I don’t know what I would say”, he admitted, feeling helpless and pathetic. “I’m so overwhelmed right now.”

Cat nodded. “I know, sweetie. But, talking to Alec, understanding what happened last night? I think that’s more important than your comfort right now. For your own good, force yourself out of your comfort zone and go talk to him.”

Magnus knew she was right. He probably wouldn’t have phrased it in such a way but he was always grateful for Cat’s blatant honesty.

“Yeah”, he sighed eventually. “I should go. Maybe he’s still-”

Magnus was torn from his thought when there was a soft, hesitant knock on the door. Cat immediately perked up and pried herself away from Magnus.

Turning to him, she nodded encouragingly. “You ready for this?”

Magnus looked at her and decided he owed it to himself to be honest. “No”, he said plainly.

Cat smiled ruefully but continued towards the door.

When she reached it, she was no longer in Magnus’ line of sight. He made a point of listening as carefully as he could and when he heard the familiar rumble of Alexander’s voice, he felt both happiness and fear course through his blood.

He kept his eyes locked firmly on the corner Alec would no doubt turn around to see him. He knew that nothing he ever said or did would prepare him for the moment that Alexander walked into the room, facing him and baring himself to Magnus’ eyes.

It hadn’t even been 24 hours and yet it felt like eternity. The distance that had metaphorically grown between them since last night was exponential and from the look on Alec’s face, even he knew that.

His eyes, much like Magnus’ own, were still swollen and looked sore from rubbing. His face was unshaved and although Alec wasn’t particularly hairy, a small spattering of hair was present on his jawline already. His hair was rumpled beyond the realm of fashionably-untidy and the look on his face was hesitant and sorrowful.

“Hey Mags”, he said quietly, his voice almost more of a whimper than anything else.

Magnus felt himself choke up and he closed his eyes quickly, hoping that perhaps not seeing him would ease the pain. It didn’t.

“Hello Alexander.”

Were it not for the fact that Alec relished in the nickname, Magnus’ greeting would have felt unnecessarily cold. But from the almost non-existent tug of Alec’s lips, he could tell Alexander was grateful for such a greeting.

Slowly and warily, Alec approached Magnus. Instead of sitting beside him as Magnus expected him to, he pulled the desk chair across the room and sat in it, opposite Magnus.

Now forced to face each other, it appeared tears were inevitable.

“I’m so sorry, Mags”, Alec cried almost silently.

Magnus, were he not so desperate to hear what Alec had to say, would have probably not heard him.

“I didn’t know that how I phrased that could have been misinterpreted. I-I just thought that since you- you always know what I’m t-thinking, you understood me perfectly. You always do.”

Magnus bit his lip to conceal his sobs. He looked up at Alec and met his eye. The sadness in them made Magnus realise that whatever sorrow he was feeling, Alec was feeling too.

“I am so sorry I scared you into thinking I didn’t want to be with you”, Alec said breathlessly. “I want to. I want to be with you, I swear I do. M-more than anything.”

Magnus watched as Alec covered his mouth, muffling his sobs behind it. He watched as the man he was slowly growing to love, crumbled under his own guilt.

“I know you do, Alec.”

Alec raised his eyes to meet Magnus’ and almost smiled. Magnus was watching him with such guarded, cautious understanding.

“It isn’t that that’s hurting me”, Magnus finally admitted after a few minutes of silence between them. “I mean, originally, yes. That was what hurt. But now…”

Alec looked at Magnus with such innocent confusion that Magnus almost didn’t say what he wanted to say next.

“I’m upset because you actually thought I wanted you for sex.”

Alec opened his mouth, tears rolling freely down his cheeks, to interrupt but Magnus stopped him.

“After all I told you about Will, about how I had to take this step by step, you still doubted me.”

Alec let out a sob and, shaking his head desperately, turned to Magnus. “No”, she cried. “It wasn’t that, I swear. W-What was I supposed to think when you _left_ me, after I turned you down?”

The vulnerability in his voice made Magnus release his first weep of the night. “You were f-fine initiating sex earlier.”

Alec shook his head once more, as though he were begging Magnus to understand. “That was different”, he insisted. “That was-”

“-How was it different?”

Magnus watched as Alec closed himself off, tensing noticeably. The look his retreat garnered from Magnus made Alec determined to tell the truth.

“I’ve… I’ve done all that before so it wasn’t a big deal. I said before that I’ve never been in love and I wasn’t lying.” Alec started, voice shaking uncontrollably. “I’ve never been in love and I’ve never… I’ve never made love, Magnus.”

"But during the drinking games... you said you slept with someone of the same sex?" 

Alec looked distraught as he shook his head. "I've slept with someone before, as in... y'know, done sexual things. But never all the way", he supplied quietly. 

Magnus stared at Alec in obvious shock. For all the innocence and vulnerability Alec showed, Magnus had never expected that Alec might also be nervous about that part of romance.

“I wasn’t ready to do that because I wanted to save that for until I was sure”, trailing off, Alec looked away shyly.

Magnus leant forward and watched him. “About what?”

“Hm?”

“Until you were sure about what?”

Alec winced, clearly uncomfortable. Eventually he sighed and met Magnus’ eyes. “Until I was sure I was falling in love with you.”

Magnus buckled under the pressure and immediately let out a sob. Alec, almost as though waiting for such a reaction, did the exact same.

“You’re falling in love with me?” Magnus cried, in shock and complete disbelief. Sure, he had been feeling similarly, but never, especially after last night, did he think Alec might feel the same.

Alec nodded sorrowfully. “I think so, yeah.”

Magnus forced himself to remain calm and nodded. “Do you know how terrifying this all is for me?”

Alec appeared startled by the question. Taking a moment to absorb it, he watched as Magnus bit his quivering lip. “No”, he eventually admitted.

Magnus nodded. “I told you I hadn’t been with a guy since Will and that was 7 whole years ago. And yet, you come along and somehow unwind 7 years of fear and make me wanna dive in head first. I don’t know how, but you came alone and unlocked something within me from the moment I laid eyes on you.”

Alec watched him. He didn’t know what to say, didn’t have anything _to_ say.

“So… for you to turn around and doubt me like that…”

Alec tensed, looking at Magnus desperately.

“That kills me, Alec.”

Alec choked on the air he attempted to swallow. “I swear, Magnus, I don’t doubt you. I just… I’m so scared of all this, of falling in love with you. It wasn’t me doubting you, it was me doubting myself.”

Magnus nodded solemnly. “I think I see that now”, he admitted. “But Alec… you have to understand that what happened last night…”

Alec nodded. “I know. I know”, he rambled. “I know and I’m so damn sorry, Mags. I’m so sorry for making you think I didn’t want you!”

Magnus appeared to not have anything to say. Alec remained quiet, desperate to give Magnus full control of where the conversation went.

After a moment, it appeared Magnus had chosen the path the conversation would follow.

“How do the others know, Alec?”

Alec looked slightly confused. “About us?”

“About us”, Magnus clarified.

Alec’s face was overcome with emotion in that moment. “I don’t know, Mags. I swear, I don’t know. I tried so hard to keep it a secret because I know how much you needed that and I wanted to do t-that for y-you. I don’t- I don’t know.”

Magnus watched as Alec grew more and more panicked as he spoke. Reaching across the distance between them, Magnus laid his hand on Alec’s knee.

“You worked so hard to try and do that for me”, he began. Alec listened intently. “You have no idea how much that means to me.”

Alec smiled softly. “I think I do”, he said kindly.

Magnus nodded. “Perhaps you do.”

“Magnus”, Alec began quietly, almost unsure. “What does this mean for us?”

The sadness in his voice made it seem almost as though he was giving up. Almost as though he was surrendering. Magnus felt his heart clench at that; Alec always sacrificed his happiness for others and here he was, doing it again but this time in an attempt to make Magnus as happy and comfortable as he could.

“I don’t know”, he settled for. “Things can’t go back though Alec. Maybe… Maybe we rushed into this too fast.”

Alec looked broken, like a china doll that had been dropped one too many times. Magnus wasn’t sure how many more blows Alexander could take before he shattered apart, unable to be repaired.

“I want to be with you, Alec. I really, really do. But, this has just shown me how _not_ ready we are for each other.”

“What do you mean?” Alec whimpered.

Magnus sighed in defeat. “I mean I need time to handle all this; people knowing, being in a relationship, letting myself fall in love with you. I’m sorry for doing this to you, I should have grown comfortable in myself and being out before starting a relationship with you.”

“But-”

“-And I think we both know you need time to accept what’s happened, to work yourself up to being with me, to work on trusting me properly.”

“I do trust you”, Alec insisted, but even to his own ears the plea sounded empty.

Magnus smiled sadly. “No you don’t, baby. And that’s okay, but you need to work up to that. You need to address whatever it is holding you back from trusting me to look after your heart.”

Alec looked reluctant and he continued to gasp for breaths. Again, Magnus squeezed his knee to ground him. Alec looked at him thankfully.

“You said you wanted to wait until you were sure”, Magnus said sadly. “I’m giving you the time you need… to be sure. Because I am.”

“I don’t deserve you”, Alec said breathlessly, looking deep into the eyes of the man he was trying desperately to let himself love.

Magnus smiled painfully. “You do, and that’s the problem.”

“So… what now?”

“Now”, Magnus sighed. “I want to kiss you one more time.”

Alec stared at Magnus as though the idea physically hurt him. Reminding himself that he had been the one to put them in the situation, Alec knew that he had to allow it, in order to help both himself and Magnus.

“Do it”, he whispered, the words reminiscent of their closeness the day before, tucked away in the bathroom stool of a town bar.

Magnus fell to his knees in front of Alec’s chair and rested his hands on Alec’s thigh. Alec attempted to ignore the flashing memories he had of a museum, sitting beside Magnus before all of this happened, feeling Magnus gently graze his thigh tentatively, and for the first time.

Before Alec knew it, Magnus had captured his lips. Alec gasped but immediately allowed himself to relax into the kiss, sinking into the safety of Magnus’ arms, and kissing him back. He basked in the moment, praying that he would remember every detail, knowing deep down that there was a chance this would be their last time.

The last time he might kiss the man he loved.

Alec allowed himself to think back to their first kiss, his neck arched as Magnus leaned over him, their weight sinking into the comfortable mattress they occupied. Now though, the situation was entirely reversed and was nothing like it was before. It was almost poetic, in a sad way, how even their kiss somehow managed to reflect how much had changed between them.

Perhaps they could work this out; perhaps Alec could work on what he still didn’t acknowledge as the thing holding him back. Perhaps Magnus could allow himself to love Alec, free from the fear of judgement. Perhaps they would both do what they needed to do and perhaps in the end they would still be right for each other.

But sadly, they weren’t now.

Their kiss ended in the same way it had started, slowly and passionately. Alec could tell how reluctant Magnus was to pull back but both men knew that they needed to accept what had happened.

Magnus finally pulled away, resting his head on Alec’s and sighing. “Aku akan menunggumu”, he whispered.

Alec had no idea what he said but the familiar sound of Magnus’ native language was enough to make him smile. He let himself appreciate this final moment before pulling away from Magnus, the metaphorical distance between them less, but still there.

Slowly, the physical distance between them also grew and eventually Magnus was left alone.

“Aku akan menunggumu”, he promised once more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys liked this one and how the boys have decided to solve their problems. 
> 
> Let me know what you thought :)


	15. Talking Things Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec and Magnus finish their discussion. Magnus confronts Isabelle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello people! Sorry it's a little later in the day than normal but you're still getting the chapter ;)
> 
> Now, I have bad news. I have been informed that on holiday..... I'll have no wifi! I know, I'm sorry!  
> So instead, because I know 5 days is a long time to go without an update, I'm going to post 2 tonight so you can either read them both now or pace yourself throughout the week but dont worry, you will get any update on Friday when I get back! :D

 

 

 

* * *

 

Chapter 15

Alec was actually rather proud of himself when he managed to refrain from talking to Magnus for a whole 2 hours. Despite the fact that he felt somewhat better after their discussion, he couldn’t help thinking that not everything had been said and it was only beneficial to get everything out in the open.

That, and frankly, the entire discussion felt vaguely one sided.

Considering Alec had no idea what had entailed when Izzy had supposedly confronted Magnus, he therefore had no clue as to what Magnus had felt when he _was_ convinced they were broken up. And, while that seemed silly to need to know, Alec felt that he had a right to know how and why Magnus felt the way he felt.

And so, 2 hours after closing Magnus’ bedroom door  behind him, he returned.

Well, not exactly Magnus’ bedroom door, more like Jace, Raphael and Ragnor’s hotel room door.

Magnus seemed almost as surprised as Alec felt when he opened the door.

“Alec?”

Alec grinned nervously. “Hi, Magnus. Can we talk?”

Magnus looked baffled for a moment. “I thought we already did?”

“Well”, Alec mumbled awkwardly. “It’s just that I didn’t feel that everything that needs to be said…. was said.”

For a short moment, Magnus looked ready to refuse and truth be told, Alec couldn’t blame him. The discussion however, while beneficial for Magnus, hadn’t really provided Alec with the answers he personally needed. First and foremost, he needed to know how Magnus was feeling since, to his surprise, Magnus didn’t really delve into that in their talk.

Eventually Magnus nodded and wordlessly held open the door. Alec slid past him and immediately sat himself down on one end of Jace’s bed. Magnus, who no doubt had been sitting on Ragnor or Raphael’s, looked a little apprehensive but eventually perched himself down on the opposite end.

“So, Alec. What did you want to talk about?”

Alec refused to acknowledge how distant the use of the name ‘Alec’ made him feel to Magnus and instead began to explain. “I just didn’t feel like we finished our discussion, it felt incomplete to me.”

Magnus nodded slowly. “Okay. Shoot.”

Alec almost panicked for a moment, unsure where to start. “Okay well, how are you?”

Magnus stared at Alec dubiously. “I’m okay, how are you?”

“No”, Alec sighed, shaking his head. “How _are_ you, Magnus?”

Magnus paused, absorbing the true meaning of Alec’s question. He watched Alec with wary eyes before sighing. “Honestly? I’m, er, a little overwhelmed with everyone knowing about us. I can’t say that I was ready for that.”

Alec nodded sadly. “Raph said that everyone was there”, he frowned; Alec more than anyone understood how Magnus felt about being out with him.

“Yeah”, Magnus exhaled. “As much as I adore your sister, I really wasn’t prepared for her to storm in and shout it to the whole word.”

His chuckle was clearly not genuine and it made Alec cringe. “Wha- How did she- She shouted it?”

Magnus nodded apprehensively, almost as though he was reluctant to explain. “Yeah, she stormed it and shouted at me for leaving you and accused me of only wanting you for sex. As you can imagine, for a bisexual, having someone shout that you use someone for sex sort of puts you in a tricky situation.”

Alec groaned as he rested his head in his hands. “Crap. Magnus, I’m really sorry for how that went down. She was just being overprotect-”

“-I know”, Magnus said, waving him off. “Beside the point, apart from that I’m not feeling amazing but… I don’t regret the decision we made.”

Alec blinked slowly, watching Magnus for any indication of deception; he saw none. “Well, that’s kind of the thing. It’s just… I’m happy with the decision too but I feel like we can’t really solve the problem if we don’t know the full extent of it.”

Magnus raised his eyebrow but nodded, urging Alec to continue.

Alec was admittedly uncomfortable but appreciated having his ear. “Look, Magnus. I have to ask; why did you think I would break up with you?”

Magnus gulped down a huge breath at the question like he had been expecting it but hoped it wouldn’t crop up. Frowning, he looked at Alec and attempted to bare his guilt and regret plainly in his eyes. “First of all, I’m sorry for that. Assuming that you didn’t want me was ridiculous because all you’ve done so far is be insanely supportive, especially with the keeping-us-private thing. I guess… I just figured that maybe after everything that we’d been through you might be regretting jumping in so fast and that me wanting to go further, y’know sexually, shocked you enough to make you want to back off.”

Alec frowned. He honestly felt like there was more to it than that but he simply nodded, allowing Magnus to continue.

“I’m so used to people not liking what they get with me, Alec. With Camille it was my sexuality and with anyone I’ve tried to be with since, there’s something about me they wanted to change. I guess I just assumed you would be the same.”

Alec nodded thoughtfully, cataloguing all of his emotions and slowly registering them one by one. First of all, he felt sad because ultimately whatever happened between them, knowing that Magnus doubted himself that much hurt to hear. Secondly, he felt disappointment. Knowing that Magnus would so carelessly categorise him as ‘just like the rest’ was painful. And last but without a doubt not least was anger at knowing that Magnus would jump to such conclusions.

“You told me that I had to work on trusting you, which in my opinion was unfair”, Alec finally said. “But I feel like you don’t trust me either.”

Magnus winced at his phrasing but looked down at his lap guiltily. “To be honest, it’s not that I don’t trust you it’s that I don’t trust all of _this_. I- nothing good lasts for me, Alec. Why would this time be any different?”

Alec shook his head. “I’m not Will, Magnus”, he said sternly. “And the people around us aren’t Camille. You have to remember that.”

Magnus sighed. “I know. It takes time though Alec.”

“I don’t doubt that”, Alec said softly. “But I need you, right now, to think about that. Yesterday you blamed all of our problems on me not trusting you, well know it’s time _you_ trust _me_. Remember that regardless of what happened with Will, we are a completely different relationship. You can’t continue to compare our relationship to your past ones because that’s just… not fair on me or healthy for you.”

Magnus nodded reluctantly. He knew that he was guilty of doing exactly what Alexander was talking about and he was right, it wasn’t fair on Alec. That didn’t make it easier to stop though. “I promise I’ll try”, he agreed.

Alec bit his lip but accepted it, knowing that asking any more of Magnus would be entirely unfair. “Also, I think that, first and foremost you need to be more confident in us. As soon as you stop comparing me to Will, you’ll trust me more and you’ll trust this”, he waved between them, “more. But, it also wouldn’t hurt to have more confidence in yourself.”

Magnus blinked furiously to divert his tears. “I know”, he muttered. “As I said before, I need to work on making myself comfortable before being with you.”

Alec smiled slightly. “Good. You have no idea how much I just want you to be happy, Mags.”

“I think I do”, Magnus said, his lip quirking into a small smirk. “You’ve been great about this Alec. I didn’t even spare a moment to thank you for everything you do for me in return. Trust me, while I’m still not there yet, you’ve helped me shape how I feel about myself so much. So thank you, really.”

Alec’s smile grew wider as he watched Magnus hurriedly wipe away tears. “I’ll always be here to remind you how special you are, Magnus Bane.”

Magnus beamed. “Me too.”

They stayed like that for a moment, simply smiling at one another. It was clear they both needed a moment to appreciate what they had taken advantage of up until this point. Alec never really let it sink in how much Magnus did to ensure his happiness, even if it risked his own. And Magnus never spared a moment to acknowledge how hard Alec tried to provide for him in every way he could.

“I really don’t want to lose this”, Magnus said softly, watching the wind from the open window gently move stray strands of Alec’s hair.

Alec blushed under the attention but agreed. “Me too. I really want to be friends, Magnus. I know that everyone says that and that, let’s be honest, it’s the cheesiest and worst line ever but I really do mean it and I know that-”

“-Alec!” Magnus shouted. “I get it”, he snickered.

Alec’s cheeks tinted even darker as Magnus laughed but he smiled gently. “Magnus”, he said shyly. “There’s just one last thing I wanna get out in the open before we move past this.”

Magnus looked slightly confused, after all what more could there be, but he simply settled down to listen.

“I know that at the time you didn’t know and, I don’t know, maybe it’s my fault for initiating sex in the restroom yesterday but…. I really wasn’t ready for you to do what you did.”

Magnus watched as Alec’s confidence literally melted away, revealing an incredibly vulnerable man behind. Alec’s eyes were downcast and his voice was so powerless and quiet.

It took Magnus a moment to actually comprehend what Alec was talking about.

“Oh. That.”

Alec nodded, biting his lip.

“Alec”, Magnus sighed. “I am seriously so sorry for that. I-I should have asked first, I should have made sure that that was okay with you, even if we did something earlier.”

Alec nodded gratefully. “I know that I’m in the wrong here for giving mixed signals but-”

“-It’s not mixed signals, Alec. Both other times we’ve been intimate you vocally consented and that time you didn’t. I got a little over-confident and eager so I sincerely apologise.”

Alec looked up at Magnus apprehensively. Magnus could tell that Alec was still not entirely convinced it wasn’t his fault but he watched as the younger man nodded anyway.

“Okay”, Alec whispered.

Magnus smiled as gently as he could. “Thank you for doing this Alec. I… I needed to hear all of this. You’re right; we won’t get past this until we acknowledge everything. So thank you for not holding back.”

Alec resisted a smile but Magnus could see a small hint of it.

 

…

 

“What do you think will happen now?” Simon said dramatically, glancing around at all the occupants of the RV.

The rest of the group had decided to leave the boys in their respective rooms for a few more hours before the hotel kicked them out, in the hopes they might calm down and talk things out. Cat had already informed them that Alec had met with Magnus but that didn’t stop Simon from panicking.

“Nothing, Simon”, Clary moaned. “They’ll work through it, I’m sure.”

Izzy nodded but she looked unconvinced. “Yeah, everything will be fine.”

Simon frowned and slammed his hands down on the table, making everyone around him leap back in surprise. “What if it’s not fine? What if every trip in the future if awkward and uncomfortable because they’re broken up?!”

Jace gaped at Simon, eyes narrowed in baffled confusion.

“Calm down, Shannon.”

Everyone turned to face Magnus, who had entered the RV with his overnight back. Tossing it into the open doorway to his and Ragnor’s room, he looked at the group dubiously. “Y’know, it’s kind of rude to talk about people when they’re not here.”

Simon looked down shamefully.

When no one spoke, Magnus sighed, rolling his eyes. “I need to talk to Isbelle so if you could all kindly bugger off…”

It took a moment but slowly everyone leapt into action. Izzy remained seated and frozen, looking more than a little worried. Magnus suspected she knew what he wanted to discuss.

Magnus made a point of claiming the seat opposite her.

“I have a feeling you know what I want to talk about, don’t you Iz?”

Izzy looked more than a little uncomfortable but nodded. “Yeah. I, uh, I have an idea.”

Magnus smiled softly; he’d always appreciated honesty and it appeared that Izzy was never in short supply of it. “Look, Izzy”, he began. “I’m not angry at you for getting upset back there; I would have too. But… you were one of the few people who understood how important it was to me for me and Alec to stay private.”

Izzy looked heartbroken. “But, everyone already knew that you’re-”

“-It doesn’t matter Izzy”, Magnus insisted, his voice breaking as he grew more upset. “I. Wasn’t. Ready.”

For a moment Magnus was unsure whether Izzy understood his feelings about what happened but after a moment he noticed a small tear caress her cheek.

“You’re right”, she whimpered. “It doesn’t matter. Magnus I am so, so sorry.”

Magnus nodded. “I know you are. But I’m just-”

“-I get it”, Izzy jumped. “You need time. I wouldn’t be surprised if you never trusted me again. I- Just please know that I never ever wanted to make you feel like that. And I never wanted to out you. Trust me, with Alec as a teen, I know what being outed can do to someone.”

Magnus raised an eyebrow, unfamiliar with the story she was alluding to. Izzy seemed unaware of his confusion however and she slowly shuffled around the table towards him.

Magnus smirked when he saw her open her arms for a hug.

“I’m really sorry, Magnus.”

Magnus crossed his arms defiantly. “There’s only one way I’ll forgive you.”

Izzy paled for a moment but frantically nodded. “Anything.”

“Tell me that I’m a good kisser.”

Izzy gaped at him but soon enough she erupted in laughter. Magnus quickly wrapped her in his arms, burying his face in her dark hair.

When they pulled apart, Izzy’s face was once again serious. “How are you?”

Magnus frowned. “That’s two out of three Lightwoods who have asked me that today”, he informed playfully. “Honestly I feel pretty crappy; I feel like everywhere I look, someone is watching and no doubt judging me.”

Izzy looked distraught but she nodded, offering her ear.

“I feel like I’m just waiting for the second when someone will turn and just… I don’t know.”

“Magnus”, Izzy sighed sadly. “You’ve got to know we accept you.”

Magnus nodded and smiled ruefully. “As I’ve been told”, he complained. “But no one can speak for the others for sure.”

Izzy couldn’t connect with his emotions in that moment but she could definitely understand his reasoning. “Well, I can’t speak for the others but for now, just know that I, as a fellow bisexual, love and support you in your sexuality.”

Magnus watched her closely, scanning her body and eyes for any sign of deception or trickery. Her smile seemed to him to be the most genuine one she had ever seen and her body was ever so slightly leaning towards him. Magnus took the chance and pulled her into another hug, this one not a hug of friendship but a hug of comfort.

“Thank you”, he spluttered. “I’ll… try to keep that in mind.”

Izzy beamed, tightening her arms around him. “I know it’ll take time for you to trust me again but… I’m here if you need me, Magnus.”

Magnus nodded. “I know, Isabelle.”

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys enjoyed this! 
> 
> I know there's another chapter here too but don't forget to tell me what you thought of THIS one as well because honestly... your comments make my day! Seriously :D


	16. Vegas, Baby!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the end of their trip and, as promised, they head to Vegas to "go out with a bang!"
> 
> Alec gets drunk and Magnus is forced to look after him which is both adorable and... saddening.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter! 
> 
> (REMEMBER TO CHECK OUT THE LAST ONE, THESE ARE BEING ADDED ON THE SAME DAY)

 

 

 

* * *

 

Chapter 16

It was almost poetic how the remaining month of their trip ended exactly how Alec and Magnus did; in the blink of an eye.

They had spent their final month doing exactly what Clary had wanted. In Georgia, after taking a day to all calm down, they had visited Six Flags, Georgia Aquarium, the Atlantic Botanical Gardens and even a zoo. They had then headed to Florida, where they, of course, went to Disney Land. Their 2nd day in Florida was spent at Sea World and their 3rd was spent all day on the beach. Finally, they headed to New York where they did more than Alec could even remember. They had visited every tourist attraction they could, had spent many tedious hours shopping and had even taken part in a small parade they caught sight of, much to Isabelle’s delight.

In all that time, Alec and Magnus didn’t speak. It wasn’t because they didn’t want to or because they now hated each other or anything or the sort, it was purely because both men had nothing to say. It was going to take more than just a month to fix what problems they had postponed facing for most of their lives.

That being said, Alec had in no way stopped thinking about Magnus. The memories of the man he was growing to love crying and weeping were soon replaced by memories of him screaming and laughing. It was amazing to be able to see how happy Magnus was around his friends, even if he himself was forced to watch from the side lines.

Everyone had been surprisingly supportive, all of them proud that the boys hadn’t taken the easy way out. There was, understandably, still some tension between Alec, Cat and Ragnor but aside from that everyone was well again; Izzy and Magnus were back to their old ways, except now Isabelle made a point of _not_ teasing him about Alec.

Magnus appeared more comfortable in himself but Alec was still privy to moments where he broke and his confidence slipped away to reveal the true fear harboured underneath. Normally Cat would comfort him but every now and then Alec saw Izzy take her place. He knew that things had been incredibly sketchy for the pair for the first few weeks but it appeared now that Magnus was growing more comfortable around her once more. Alec was glad, because if Magnus couldn’t have him he was glad he had Izzy. That and he trusted Izzy to look after the man he loved.

The support for Magnus remained powerful through the entire final month of the trip. Although Alec suspected that Magnus found it somewhat annoying, people made a point of reminding him that they loved him and accepted him on a daily basis. For some that came in the form of heartfelt ‘I love you’s and for others, teasing was their go-to method of support (which often included similar digs thrown Alec’s way- they were never going to let them live down their restroom visit, regardless of how clearly uncomfortable it made them both.)

Either way, Alec knew that it helped for every time he witness Magnus break, he noticed there was less and less resistance to the truth of the idea that everyone loved him. He was slowly starting to believe it.

That’s not to say that all was well, however. Magnus clearly still struggled more often than not and Alec himself was far from finished when it came to sorting through his problems. He suspected there was really only one way for him to move past his problems and to be honest, Alec didn’t want to think about _that_.

And so after 2 months, the trip came to an end. Clary was definitely the most upset on their last night together.

They were in Nevada, on their way home, but had planned to stop in Las Vegas for the night to fulfil Magnus’ promise of “going out with a bang”.

“We need at least $100, if not more, for the rest of the journey home”, Cat called across the RV to Izzy.

They were currently all parked, sorting through and deciding what of their remaining money they could spend tonight.

“That’s fine”, Izzy mumbled, sorting through the money and putting aside the desired amount.

Alec slouched back in the chair he was in, arm thrown across the back of Jace’s, who sat beside him. The man in question was bouncing in his seat, ecstatic to be in Vegas. Or just outside of Vegas.

“Dude, seriously stop moving or I _will_ hit you”, Alec warned, growing impatient.

Jace stuck his tongue out and in that moment Alec was reminded of how much of a child Jace was. “God, someone needs to get laid”, Jace snorted.

Alec did his best not to react but he knew that those around him did. From across the table, Magnus tensed and looked away hastily. Izzy hissed at Jace under her breath and Clary shook her head at him with a meaningful look. Jace, whose relationship with Clary had thankfully begun to improve, raised an eyebrow in confusion.

When Clary nodded to Alec, Jace seemed to understand. “Oh crap! Sorry you guys. I didn’t even th-”

“-It’s fine”, Magnus quickly interrupted, eyes glued to his phone in order to prevent himself from looking at Alec.

When Jace turned to look at him slightly panicked, Alec shrugged and shook his head. “It’s cool, Jace”, he promised. It had been a month after all, how was Jace supposed to remember?

Quickly changing the subject, Izzy began to hand out small wads of cash to each occupant of the RV.  When Alec received his, he gaped. “Jesus, Iz. How do we have this much left over?”

Jace flicked through his money with the biggest grin Alec had ever seen. “Seriously, this is insane”, he said merrily.

Ragnor looked slightly baffled as he eyed Izzy. “Do tell, Isabella.”

Izzy rolled her eyes. “I won’t tell you again, Ragdoll.”

Ragnor snorted. “Isabelle”, he corrected pointedly.

Izzy grinned. “Well it’s pretty much from the first few weeks on the trip”, she began. “They were pretty uneventful before Clary came along and wrote out the plans. I did count the money every day, by the way, as the person who was looking after it.”

Jace grinned. “Yeah, why was it you we entrusted with the money again?”

Izzy glared at him, but there was no heat behind it. “It’s not like we didn’t all have our cards to ourselves or anything. I didn’t have _complete_ control.”

Jace raised his hands in surrender. “Jeez Isabella, check yourself before you wreck yourself”, he said, in a very poorly executed Valley girl accent.

Alec snorted out a laugh when Isabelle smacked her brother up the side of the head. Jace smirked.

“Wait a minute”, Clary suddenly called. “We need money to pay for a hotel too! Surely we won’t be heading back to the RV?”

Alec looked around the table and saw equally displeased looks on everyone’s face. Izzy groaned in annoyance as she took back everyone’s money, sorting through it and putting another generous pile off to the sides. She eventually handed everyone back out their money but Jace immediately complained about how the piles were now barely half of what they were before.

Izzy shrugged. “Sorry, big bro. Gotta pay for a hotel room.”

“Are you gonna give us all our money to get said rooms?” Alec piped up.

Izzy turned to Alec and shook her head. “Sorry, bigger bro, but rather than trusting Jace not to spend it, we’re all getting our rooms before we head out.”

Jace grumbled very unpleasantly.

“This is gonna be awesome!” Simon called, raising his hand in a high five.

When no one responded to him, Magnus rolled his eyes. He quickly raised his hand and high-fived Simon before he could bring himself to regret it. Simon cheered loudly and gently punched Magnus’ shoulder.

“Hell yeah, me n’ you, Mags! We’ll explore Vegas together.”

Magnus looked up at the rest of the group in panic. “Uh, no thanks Simon”, he said pathetically. “I think I’ll stick to flying solo on this. Also, don’t call me Mags.”

Simon moaned in disappointment but Magnus ignored him, instead casting his eyes to Alexander. Alec was watching him too, and the smile that slowly crept onto his face showed his appreciation; only Alec got to call him that.

“Okay!” Jace clapped. “Let’s do this!”

Everyone quickly headed back to their respective caravans, Cat starting the engine and driving off first. Magnus drove close behind.

The drive didn’t last exceptionally long but it was certainly long enough to bore Jace, who within minutes had slipped into the front seat.

“Stop distracting the driver, Jace”, Alec laughed as he approached.

Cat looked back and him and grinned. “Please take him away from me Alec”, she giggled, turning back to the road. “He’s really a pain in the ass”

“Oh I know”, Alec snorted.

Although Magnus moving back to drive his own caravan was hard, Alec was glad that he did. Not only did it give Alec more time to mend what friendship he had with Cat but the distance also prevented either of them from just letting go of what happened and being with each other. It had been agreed that were they not apart, they would probably not do what they needed to do, and right now that was not be together.

The worst part of the change was the nights… Alec missed their late night conversations. Truth be told it wasn’t even the relationship that he missed, but rather having Magnus to simply talk to.

“How much longer?” Jace whined.

“You are literally a child”, Cat complained loudly.

Alec smirked. “You didn’t live with him for over a decade”, he said.

Cat nodded thoughtfully. “And boy am I glad about that”, she grinned.

Jace looked beyond insulted. “Like living with Magnus is any better”, he grumbled, crossing his arms and turning away as he sulked.

“Puh-lease! Magnus is a lovely roommate”, Catarina said happily. “He cooks breakfast, stays up late for cuddles, fills the house with music- which can admittedly be a little annoying when you’re trying to work, but you win some you lose some.”

Alec smiled gently. “Prince?”

Cat threw her head back and cackled. “Oh yes, a lot of Prince!”

Alec bit his lip to stop from laughing, remembering a late night conversation when they had eagerly shared their hobbies; Magnus loved dancing, which of course explained his career path.

Jace looked disgusted. “Prince?” he gaped. “No way! We all need a good bit of the King every now and then.”

Alec rolled his eyes. “You say that like you listen to Elvis… like _at all.”_

Jace glared. Rolling his eyes, he said rather proudly, “I’m not talking about Elvis. I’m talking about the true King.”

Cat raised an eyebrow but eventually she seemed to grasp what he meant. “Oh! Michael Jackson?”

Jace nodded, smirking widely.

Cat nodded in approval. “Good choice, my friend, good choice. It’s almost a shame Magnus is a Prince guy because I’d love me some MJ while I work.”

Alec resisted the urge to roll his eyes at where their conversation had headed. “Can’t he listen to both?”

“Alec!” Jace scoffed. “Of course not! It’s like marmite, you either love it or you hate it. In a single household, it’s either Prince or MJ.”

Alec frowned. “That’s stupid”, he groaned. “I listen to both so what does that make me?”

“An anomaly we must study”, Cat piped up, grinning wildly.

Alec burst into laughter. Ruffling Cat’s hair slightly, he turned to leave. “You both are crazy!”

Cat returned the sentiment before eagerly engaging Jace in conversation about how “drop dead gorgeous” young Michael really was. Alec, who was sort of prone to liking men, would agree with her had he not made a point of abandoning such a weird conversation.

 

…

 

Soon enough they had all booked their hotel rooms and made themselves comfortable. After a short dinner at a local café, they agreed to all head onto the town and see where they ended up.

Jace had, obviously, raced ahead, followed closely by a scarily eager Simon.

“It’s literally always Jace”, Alec laughed quietly.

Everyone voiced their agreement.

“Like you don’t wanna just run ahead and get started”, Magnus teased, joining Alec, Izzy and Raphael at the front of their group.

Alec felt his lips tug into a small smile. “You know me so well”, he said sarcastically.

Magnus beamed. “I know right!” he chuckled, using the same tone of voice as Alec.

Alec felt as though a weight had been lifted from his chest and as though he could finally breath; it was nice, joking with Magnus for the first time since they broke up.

“So, where do we think they’ve gone?” Izzy called out over the loud sounds of Vegas.

Alec shrugged. “Let’s find out!”

 

…

 

For the rest of his life Alec was sure the question would go unanswered. Whether it was because no one knew the answer or because everyone knew it but didn’t want to admit it.

But how the hell had he been left alone with Magnus?

_While drunk?_

“It’s so sad.”

Magnus grinned, watching Alec from his position on the bed. Alec had somehow spent the entire night jumping from casino to casino before eventually allowing Magnus to drag him back to his hotel room.

Now, he was rolling on the carpet, mumbling complete gibberish.

“What’s sad, Alec?”

Alec pulled himself along the carpet with his arms until he reached the door frame, where he pointed down at a small stain on the cream floor. “This is sad. This, right here.”

Magnus’s eyes widened in surprise. “Wait? What?”

Alec nodded repeatedly. “To think”, he slurred. “The cleaners come and clean and then people make it unclean. It’s sad, Mags. Don’t you think?”

Alec heard the sound of Magnus’ laugh and immediately turned to face him, desperate to catch a glimpse of the smile he knew would be on Magnus’ face. Dropping his head onto the carpet and grinning dopily, Alec watched as Magnus laughed wholeheartedly before holding his stomach as he calmed down.

“Oh my God, Alec! You’re such a funny drunk”, Magnus cackled.

Alec couldn’t help but giggle. He wasn’t sure what was funny but Magnus’ smile was just so adorable. “Am I?”

Magnus smiled, nodding. “Very much so.”

Alec looked away somewhat wistfully. “Good.”

“We should probably go… find your sister”, Magnus eventually said.

The silence that had settled between them was never awkward, but it was definitely growing far too charged for Magnus’ liking. In the month they had now been apart, Magnus had made multiple promises to himself that if he was going to be with Alec in the future, then that meant no messing around in the present; the breakup had to be serious and there could be no slip ups or hook ups.

Which made it really hard for Magnus to fight the desire he felt pool in his stomach when Alexander suddenly stripped his shirt off.

“A-Alec… uh, what are you doing?”

Alec rose to his feet, stumbling all the way, and grinned at Magnus. “I’m going to find my sister”, he said. Alec’s voice was slurred but also higher pitched that usual; it made for an adorable combination that tugged at Magnus’ heart strings.

“Why do you need to take your shirt off for that?”

Alec laughed as though what Magnus had said was funny. “Mags you’re so silly.”

Offering no more explanation, he slid the key card through the door and began to stumble over the threshold. Magnus immediately leapt from the bed, wrapping his arms around Alec and carrying him as best as he could. Alec took the opportunity to rest his head on Magnus’ shoulder, slouching into his embrace.

“Magnus”, he whispered.

Magnus looked down at Alec and frowned, attempting to guide him out of the hotel as safely as possible. “What’s up, Alec?”

Alec sniffed rather loudly and tightened his grip on Magnus. When he spoke, his voice became rough and hoarse, almost as though he were really sad.

“Why is love so phi-fuc-filical?”

Magnus smiled ruefully. “Fickle?”

Alec cheered quietly. “Yes”, he whispered, as though he was sharing a secret. “Yes, fickle.”

“I don’t know”, Magnus said sadly. In moments like this he was reminded of the time a month ago when Alec opened up to him _without_ alcohol loosening his tongue. “Not all love is fickle though”, he insisted.

Alec shook his head before burying it further into Magnus’ neck. “Ours was like… Mario”, he sighed.

Magnus snorted. “What? Mario?”

Alec groaned. “Yeah, really fast.”

Magnus almost felt tears prick at his eyes as he held his stomach. Through his laughter, he spoke. “Do you mean Sonic?”

Magnus heard Alec giggle into his neck and felt the vibrations against his skin. “Yeah”, Alec mumbled in amusement. “Sonic. Y’know, the hedgehog.”

Nodding, Magnus said, “Alec how did you get the two confused?”

Alec shrugged helplessly. “I’m drunk, Magnus. Really drunk. Do you think”, he paused to cough slightly, “that Sonic the hedgehog is the first thing on m-my mind … right now?”

Magnus grinned widely. “Of course not”, he said teasingly.

“That’s beside the point!” Alec chided. “Our love was still really, really, really, really, really, really fast.”

“That’s a lot of ‘really’s”, Magnus said.

Alec nodded. “Oh yeah. Lots and lots.”

Magnus took a moment to bask in this, holding Alec in his arms, caring for him. “You really think it was that fast?”

Alec seemed to frown from Magnus’ tone of voice. “Why do you sound so sad about it? Sometimes being as fast as Sonic is good.”

Magnus froze, stopping in the middle of the hotel lobby. “Are you… are you glad it was only short, then?”

Alec shook his head but chuckled quietly. “No. This is one of those times when it’s _not_ good to be as fast as Sonic.”

“Y’think?”

Alec nodded. “Oh yeah”, he mumbled. “Hey, watch it!” he cried when he almost fell out of Magnus’ arms while stepping down onto the sidewalk. “We don’t have to move as fast as Sonic either.”

Magnus couldn’t stop smiling as he watched Alec catch his balance, using a nearby fire hydrant to steady himself. “You okay there soldier?”

Alec chuckled. “I’m not a soldier, Magnus. I make beer.”

“You make beer?”

“I do”, Alec smirked. “I make beer and people pay me to watch me make beer.”

Magnus laughed at how confident Alec sounded. “So they come to the bar _solely_ to watch you “make” beer?”

Alec nodded but looked slightly confused. “Yeah… boy oh boy that’s a weird hobby.”

“Watching you make beer?”

“No”, Alec said, looking around at the glowing sights around him. “Making the beer is a weird hobby.”

Taking a hold of Alec’s arm again, Magnus decided to head to the place he had last seen Izzy. Last he had seen her she was challenging Jace and Simon to a game of poker in a nearby casino. Magnus prayed to God she was still there.

“Are you okay now, Magnus?”

Magnus looked abruptly at Alec who was stumbling down the street, waving at anyone and everyone he saw. Including a small, shiatzu puppy.

“Why do you ask?” Magnus said softly, stroking a small piece of hair that had fallen over his eyes, back behind his ear.

Alec watched him do it. “You- You were scared before.”

Magnus raised an eyebrow but continued to guide Alec down the street. “Was I?”

Alec snorted. “Oh yes! You were scared… y’know, of people finding out about you being.... y'know, non-hetomosexual.”

“Non-Hetomosexual?”

Alec looked down at his feet nervously as he chuckled. “I meant not straight or gay”, he smiled.

Magnus felt a strong desire to kiss Alec surge through his body as he looked at the sheepish smile on his face. Brushing away the thought he watched as Alec walked clumsily down the sidewalk.

“It’s called bisexual, baby”, Magnus said affectionately.

Alec grinned at him. “Okay”, he beamed. “But you shouldn’t call me that.”

Magnus frowned slightly. “Why’s that?”

Alec spared a glance around them before pulling Magnus to a halt. He cast his eyes at the passers-by and when he realized that none of them cared, he lent towards Magnus. “Because”, he whispered dramatically. “It turns me on.”

Magnus sprung backwards and stared at Alec for a moment. When he noticed the vaguely proud look on the younger man’s face he burst into heavy laughter. “Does it now?” he cackled.

Alec watched him, smiling. “You find that funny?”

Magnus nodded, wiping a tear from his eye. “Not that it does that to you, but more of less because you just said that.”

“It's not good, Magnus! We're all divorced and everything."

Magnus couldn't stop laughing. "We're not divorced Alec!", he cackled.

"This is like when people laugh at the word poop”, Alec slurred, rolling his head on his shoulders lazily.

Magnus shook his head affectionately; how had he ended up falling for such an idiot?

“Alec!”

Magnus looked up and immediately saw the crowd around them begin to jostle. Drunkards were pushed aside as Isabelle, Jace and Catarina propelled their way across the sidewalk towards them. Magnus felt himself sigh with relief.

“Alec!”

“Oh my gosh!” Alec gasped. “Hi Izzy!”

Izzy looked across at Magnus and raised an eyebrow. “Why is he shirtless?” she smirked, nodding to her brother. All Magnus could do was shrug helplessly.

Jace caught up with them and when he saw Alec he grinned widely. “Alec!” he cheered, throwing his arms around his brother with flare.

Cat giggled as she watched them. “They’re both pretty smashed”, she informed Magnus.

Magnus nodded with a quiet chuckle. “Oh yeah, I know. I found Alec petting a car wheel about an hour ago, took him back to his hotel room but he kept asking for Izzy so I brought him out to find you guys”, Magnus explained.

“A car wheel?” Izzy stared in disbelief.

Alec detached himself from Jace but kept an arm slung over his shoulders. “Magnus, how many times do I have to tell you; get your eyes tested!”

Magnus rolled his eyes. “Yes, that’s right. Because it wasn’t a car wheel, it was a cat, wasn’t it?”

“Yes, actually, it was”, Alec said haughtily.

Magnus grinned but looked back at Izzy. Looking her up and down he realised how relatively sober she looked. “You’re not drunk?”

“Nope”, she sighed. “Jace ran off with my purse, effectively stealing my money, and then proceeded to lose said purse. Hence why I didn’t just call.”

Magnus gaped at her. “Seriously?”

“Oh yeah”, Cat giggled. “Both of those boys are ridiculously childish drunks.”

Jace looked annoyed. “I prefer the term happy, thank you muchly!”

Alec poked Jace’s cheek as he grinned. “Did you just say muchly?”

“It’s a word”, Jace _huffed_ , pushing Alec away.

Magnus once again caught Alec firmly in his arms. Alec smiled and collapsed back into his embrace, snuggling into his collar and laughing into his skin. Once again Magnus had no clue what he was laughing about but to be honest, he didn’t care. Right now he was trying not to think about how bare-chested Alec really was.

“Where are the others?” he finally asked.

Izzy looked up from where she was, struggling to keep Jace upright. “Oh, Simon and Raphael ran off to the hotel room and Clary and Ragnor wondered off like… 2 hours ago?”

“Wow, okay”, Magnus nodded, perplexed. “Wouldn’t I have seen Raph and Simon?”

Izzy shrugged. “Maybe they got lost?”

“Or they’re hooking up in the alley”, Alec piped up. When he saw the scandalous faces of those around him he chuckled. “What?”

“Dude!” Jace cried out suddenly, slapping Alec on the back. “We should do that too!”

Magnus recoiled in horror and Izzy gaped.

“Ew, no! Do you know what… hooking up entails, Jace?” Alec slurred.

Jace rolled his eyes. “There’s nothing… wrong with t-two friends, brother in fact, playing some friendly poker.”

Cat stared at Jace as though he had sprouted a second head. “That’s not what hooking up is, Jace”, she chided.

Jace looked confused but waved her off dismissively.

Magnus took the silence as an opportunity to pull Alec closer, forcing him to his feet. Alec grumbled, displeased. “We should really head back to the hotel now.”

When both girls nodded in agreement, they each took one of Jace’s arms and began to haul him down the sidewalk with Magnus, who looped his arms around Alec’s waist and lugged him along.

“Ooh, hotel!”

Magnus rolled his eyes. “Jace, your voice is very irritating, you know that?”

Alec smirked. “He’s right Jace.”

Jace glared at the back of their heads. “You two need to suck up!”

Izzy gasped. “What?”

“I think he means shut up”, Magnus said, somewhat stoically.  “And if he didn’t mean that… then ew.”

Alec smirked, tossing his head over his own shoulder to stare at Jace. “Magnus doesn’t want to suck up so shhh!”

Magnus honestly felt the urge to slap his own face when he heard his friends all burst into laughter. Eventually they grew quiet, watching the illuminous lights passing over their heads as they continued down the street.

Their walk grew quiet save for the occasional mumbling from Jace about what “hooking up” truly meant. The peace between them relaxed Magnus and he loosened his grip on Alec slightly as he destressed.

“Magnus?” Alec whispered directly into his ear.

Magnus didn’t look at him but he could almost picture the look on Alec’s face. “Yes, Alec?”

Alec sighed. “You never answered my question”, he mumbled quietly.

“Which one?”

“Are you okay now?”

Magnus felt his heart clench at how scared Alec sounded, as though the idea of Magnus being anything but okay was tearing him up inside. His voice was quiet and vulnerable, which only made Magnus fall in love with him just a little bit more.

Ignoring the fear that bubbled in his stomach at the thought of the girls behind him seeing it, Magnus kissed Alec’s forehead gently. “I will be”, he promised.

Alec made a pleased sound, something akin to a hum. “Okay. Good.”

Magnus nodded, and as he smiled he almost wanted to cry at just _how much_ he truly felt for the man in his arms. Biting back tears, he leant his head against Alec’s as they continued down the street, not far from their hotel.

“Magnus?” Alec whispered once more.

Magnus rolled his eyes affectionately. “Yes Alec?”

“Can you start calling me Alexander again?”

Magnus looked at Alec out of the corner of his eye and frowned slightly. He hadn’t even realised that since their breakup, he hadn’t called Alec by anything other than that. Alec.

Smiling despite the feeling of his heart breaking, he realised that Alec must miss the name. It seemed to hold real meaning to Alec and was something that Magnus almost always said with love.

“Okay, Alexander.”

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked it. I didn't want to suddenly jump to the end and just randomly have the boys a-okay again so I think this was a nice in between... almost friends rather than lovers, y'know?
> 
> Let me know what you guys thought! :D Your reviews will keep me sane in the week I am aware from the interent (I'll be able to use my phone and all that!)
> 
> See you friday! ;)


	17. Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The trip ends and the everyone must say goodbye, including malec.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M BACK!!! YAYY!!  
> After a 6 hour car journey, I return! Woop woop!
> 
> (Make sure to read the author's note at the end... I have some bad news)
> 
> I find it ironic that this chapter is about vacations ending and mine just did....
> 
> ENJOY ;)

 

 

* * *

 

Chapter 17

They all knew that the day in which their trip ended, would eventually come but that didn’t make it any less disappointing. After their ridiculously eventful night in Vegas the group had been forced to drive for hours, hungover and worn out. Perhaps staying up all night drinking wasn’t the best way to spend their last night together before driving all day the next day but regardless, they all appeared reasonably content with the situation.

They had been driving since around 11am, and were aiming to get home at about 3. Of course, Jace argued that they could have stayed asleep longer considering the journey was only 4 hours but some of the group actually had work the next day.

“And he told me that my phone was great but that he wasn’t going to return it”, Izzy grumbled.

Alec raised an eyebrow, staring at his sister in complete shock. “Okay, let me get this straight; Jace stole and lost your phone, this morning I get a call asking for the ‘owner of the pink phone’ and some random guy on the other line tells you he has your phone but that it’s great and won’t give it back?”

Izzy sulked, crossing her arms in defiance. “Yes! It’s ridiculous!”

Alec nodded, mouth still agape with surprise. “That… is literally the weirdest story I have ever heard.”

“Yep”, Izzy shrugged. “I’ll have to get a new one”, she groaned.

“Or you just call the police on that asshole!” Jace piped up from his seat on the couch.

Alec, who was perched on the other end with Izzy, nodded in agreement. “Totally! Call the police and have them track his ass.”

Izzy giggled but shook her head. “Nah, I have insurance; I’ll just get a new one. Plus, I’m pretty sure I don’t want a phone back if some stranger in Vegas has had their grubby paws on it.”

Alec rolled his eyes. “I can’t believe you two have actually managed to survive this long in the real world”, he said sarcastically.

Izzy told him rather passionately where to shove it. “Are we heading back to yours when we get home?”

Alec turned to her and glared. “When do we _not_ all swarm my house without my consent?”

“We have Raphael’s”, Jace joked. “Also, why would we go back to Alec’s?”

Izzy looked somewhat uncomfortable for a moment, fiddling with her false nails. “Uh… well I thought it might be best considering, y’know… you are Clary aren’t exactly going to want to head home… together.”

Jace frowned as though the thought hadn’t crossed his mind. He nodded slowly, contemplative. “Could I stay at yours for a couple of days?”

Alec nodded, smiling sympathetically. “Of course, Jace.”

For a moment, Jace remained silent, staring into space. “Huh”, he said. “Never really hit me until now how much this breakup would change everything.”

Alec and Izzy exchanged a look. Alec would be lying if he said he wasn’t worried about Jace, even if the pair had been separated since the 2nd or 3rd week of the trip.

“Yeah. New house to find”, Izzy mumbled.

Jace nodded. The room stayed quiet for a moment or two more before Jace forced a cheerful grin onto his face. “You can help me pick out a place”, he said teasingly.

Izzy grinned slightly. “You do realise you’ll need a job first, right?”

Alec unfroze and released an almost unhuman moan. “No! No, no, no. You are _not_ staying at mine until you find a job, no way!”

Jace stared, hurt. “Pleeeaaasee?”

“No way, Jace! The last time you did that you were on my couch for like… 5 months!”

“It wouldn’t be that long this time! Plus that time I had just left college, I needed a break!”

“A break?” Alec squeaked. “Not on my couch! No way!”

Izzy rolled her eyes as she watched her brothers argue back and forth. “How about”, she shouted, gaining their attention. “How about we all just shut up and wait to see what happens when we get home?”

Alec looked sceptical but Izzy could tell that he was too tired, and no doubt hungover, to discuss it anymore. Finally, he nodded in agreement, which caused Jace to grin in triumph, before stumbling off towards his bed.

 

…

 

“You can kiss my ass before I let you stay”, Raphael growled as he lugged yet another suitcase from the RV.

They had finally arrived home, all parked in the same lot they had kept Simon’s van in. Currently, they were carrying their suitcases out of the RVs.

“Oh come on!” Jace groaned, chasing after him with his own bag. He met Raphael in the centre of the circle of bags and dropped his. “You really won’t let me stay for like… 2 weeks?”

Raphael gaped. “2 weeks? Yeah right, Jace! Like you’ll get a job in two weeks… more like 2 months.”

“Great, thank-”

“-That was _not_ me offering. It’s still a no.”

As Raphael headed back inside to fetch more bags, Jace followed after him as quickly as he could, begging the entire way there.

As they passed, Alec couldn’t help but chuckle. He’d manage to convince Raphael, as he always did, and Jace would end up staying for more than just 2 weeks, as he always did. It was almost nice to feel everything returning to normal. Life on the road had been fun but he wasn’t sure he’d ever repeat it.

“You packed and ready to go?”

Alec turned around, startled by the voice, and came face to face with Magnus. He was wearing a tight fitted, grey tank top with the words ‘I’m so gay, I can’t think straight’ embezzled on the top. Alec suppressed a laugh.

“Almost”, he said rather sadly.

Magnus nodded, as though he completely understood whatever it was Alec was feeling. He stuck his hands into the pocket of his shorts, rolling on the ball of his feet awkwardly. Alec avoided his gaze as much as possible and the tension between them was palpable.

“So”, Magnus eventually said, which again alarmed Alec. “This was… well, I mean, it was fun. Right?”

Alec watched Magnus’ face for any sign of… well, anything. The man’s face was a blank canvas and Alec could blatantly tell that Magnus was trying desperately to hide his emotions. Deciding to not make it any more awkward, Alec simply nodded.

“Well then”, Magnus said, smiling falsely. “I guess I’ll… see you soon, maybe.”

Alec was speechless. How had they become this? How had they gone from bearing their souls to each other to awkwardly sharing half-assed conversation?

Again, Alec could only nod.

Magnus returned the gesture, his smile fading quickly. “Okay… bye.”

Alec watched as Magnus spun on his heel and hurried away, no doubt eager to flee from the awkwardness around them.

“Well that wasn’t crappy at all”, Izzy laughed.

Alec turned to watch as his sister stalked away, pulling her suitcase along the gravel as she laughed at her brother.

 

…

 

“I seriously got a ticket? I rented out the damn spot!” Simon groaned, fingering the small sheet of paper tucked under his windshield wipers.

“How much?” Magnus called from behind the van, where he was helping Isabelle load the suitcases.

Raphael answered for his boyfriend, rolling his eyes for emphasis. “$200”, he grumbled.

Izzy and Magnus’ eyes widened. “Jeez!”

“You’re lucky we have $120 left from Vegas, Si”, Izzy called.

Simon nodded. “First of all, how the hell do we still have that much, and second of all, I still need $90”.

Magus smirked. “Well, Shermon, it would seem that me and Cat didn’t really drink, which is just shameful, and don’t worry, we’ll all chip in a little something.”

“Will we?” Izzy squeaked.

Magnus rolled his eyes. “It’ll be like $10, Iz.”

“Oh.”

Eventually everyone’s bags were packed in the van and everyone save Cat, Magnus and Ragnor were ready to climb in themselves.

Clary was the first one Magnus hugged goodbye.

“I’m gonna miss you”, Clary sighed as she squeezed Magnus in her arms.

Magnus grinned from where his head was trapped in Clary’s neck. Pulling himself back to full height, he smiled encouragingly down at her.

“I’ll miss you too biscuit. But don’t forget, I live like… 30 minutes from you, max.”

Clary nodded. “And you work with Izzy.”

“And I work with Izzy”, Magnus repeated with a chuckle. After a moment, he sobered and the look he gave Clary was ultimately very serious. “Listen, Clary. I know that things are gonna be tough, working out life without Jace now but… do me a favour and just… be with her.”

Clary looked baffled for a moment, having not expected such a vulnerable and desperate tone from a man she associated with confidence and attitude. “I don’t know what you-”

“-Clary”, Magnus warned. “Please do what you want. Just… be with the person you love while you can.”

Clary watched him closely for a moment and wondered whether Magnus’ own sadness at losing Alec was fuelling his encouragement or rather just his genuine love for both girls and their happiness; she suspected it was a bit of both. She looked at him and let herself admire him for a moment, his beauty and the openness of his face in that moment.

Eventually she knew she couldn’t deny him anything and she nodded. “I’ll try.”

Magnus beamed. “That’s good enough for me”, he grinned, leaning down to peck her cheek.

Hugs were soon exchanged with Simon and surprisingly, Jace, who mumbled a quiet thank you under his breath. Magnus knew immediately what he was referring to and nodded, before kindly asking that Jace “look out for him”. Jace had nodded vigorously.

“I’m not doing the whole hug thing”, Raphael warned as he approached.

The others that Magnus had bid farewell had all climbed into the van, ready to head off.

“I wouldn’t dream of it”, Magnus teased.

Raphael smiled back and then a moment seemed to be shared between them because suddenly they found themselves in each other’s arms. Raphael squeezed Magnus to him tightly.

“I’m so glad we did this”, he choked.

Magnus smiled sadly. “Me too. I’m so glad we found each other again.”

Raphael nodded in agreement as he pulled away. “Next week, alright? We’ll go out or something, yeah?”

Magnus took a moment to consume his shock at Raphael, of all people, wanting to socialise but he nodded without a moment of hesitation. “Of course.”

Raphael smiled sombrely. “I’ll see you later, brother.”

Magnus felt his throat constrict and he almost choked. He was glad he didn’t, to save himself the embarrassment. Simply nodding, he said, “You too, brother.”

Magnus watched as Raphael headed back towards the van, having already hugged Cat and Ragnor goodbye. As Magnus watched a certain Lightwood approach, he was reminded both of how much he would miss her and how much he would totally-see-her-on-Monday-so-why-are-you-upset-Magnus?

“Hey you”, Izzy greeted to which Magnus grinned. “I’m not doing the whole goodbye thing because I’ll see you at 8 tomorrow but just…” she paused for a moment to sigh. “Please don’t abandon the promises you made to him.”

Magnus raised an eyebrow. “What would make you think I would?”

Izzy shook her head quickly. “Nothing. I just want to make sure that you’re both on the same page; he’s really trying Magnus. Just… don’t give up on him, okay?”

Magnus allowed the thought to stew for a moment before nodding. “I wouldn’t dream of it Isabelle.”

Izzy smiled softly. As she began to turn back towards the van, she grinned at him. “Love you”, she said teasingly.

Magnus winked exaggeratedly. “Love you too, buttercup.”

Izzy giggled before nodding and heading towards Cat and Ragnor to say goodbye.

When Magnus noticed who the remaining Lightwood was, standing opposite him across the parking lot, he felt his entire body tense. What the hell was he supposed to say to Alexander? Was this goodbye? Was it an ‘I’ll see you soon, don’t you worry’?

He didn’t have much longer to think about it however when Alec slowly approached. Magnus watched him, acknowledging how with every step Alec took, Magnus’ heart rate increased a beat.

He wasn’t unaware of the eyes around him and how their friends were attempting to subtly watch the exchange but he was hardly going to let them deter him from saying goodbye to Alec.

“Why hello Alexander”, he greeted.

He watched as Alec’s lips twitched at the name. When he finally reached Magnus he smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “Hey Mags.”

Magnus somehow managed to contain the sob he felt rising in his chest when he heard the familiar greeting, one he hadn’t heard since the day they broke up.

Alec looked incredibly uncomfortable but he clearly didn’t let it stop him. He took a deep breath and met Magnus’ eyes. “Look, Magnus. I don’t- I don’t know what happens from here on out but… I meant what I said that day. I do want to be with you.”

Magnus grit his teeth but nodded. “I know”, he said.

Alec looked almost relieved. “Just… thank you, Magnus. For everything. This trip has been amazing and not only have you made my sister incredibly happy but… you made me really happy too. You still do.”

Magnus smiled. “I try”, he teased.

“And don’t worry”, Alec laughed. “I’ll get them together.”

Magnus, at first, was confused but pretty soon he figured it out. Grinning, he said, “I’m glad- those girls need some encouragement.”

Alec nodded in agreement. “Definitely.”

Silence settled over them and for a moment Magnus wondered if Alec would say anything to fill it. It appeared, however, that Alec was waiting for him to say something. In that moment Magnus realised that he had in no way reassured Alec and that that was perhaps something the boy was searching for.

“As I said that night, Alexander; Aku akan menunggumu.”

Alec rolled his eyes affectionately. “What does that mean?” he said, somewhat breathlessly.

Magnus shrugged, smiling. “Figure it out yourself.”

He couldn’t contain his grin as he watched Alec slowly chuckle. “Okay, I will”, Alec promised.

Very slowly, almost slow enough to convince Magnus that it wasn’t even happening, Alec began to lean in. Magnus almost felt bad for how he tensed, scared for what Alec was going to do.

Just as Alec was close enough that Magnus was convinced he was going to kiss him, Alec diverted his attention until his lips landed on Magnus’ cheek.

Immediately, Magnus felt overwhelmed with emotion. Memories flashed before his eyes of the many times Alec had done such a thing; at the museum, at the beach, during their first late night conversation.

Alec lingered for as long as possible before it became too long.

“Our thing”, Magnus mumbled playfully under his breath as Alec drew away.

Alec grinned. “Yep.”

Despite the peacefulness of the situation, Magnus knew the silence couldn’t last forever so with one final smile, he said the words he hoped never to say to Alec ever again.

“Bye, Alexander.”

Alec looked down at his feet sadly but nodded. He looked at Magnus one more time, eyes darting across every detail of his face as though he were trying to remember it.

“Bye Magnus.”

Magnus watched with a heavy heart as Alec joined his sister and the pair headed off to jump into the back of Simon’s van. With one final wave, Simon started the engine and began to exit the parking lot. Although he knew he couldn’t see him through the van doors, Magnus had a feeling Alec was smiling.

“You okay?”

Magnus turned to Cat and smiled but even he knew how unconvincing it was. “Yeah. I’ll be okay.”

Neither of them commented on the fact that that was not the question Cat asked. They simply stood, with Ragnor, watching the little yellow van drive away before heading back to their RVs to finally head home.

 

…

 

Alec wasn’t ashamed to admit that he almost cried when he felt the familiar, comforting warmth of his own bed. Collapsing onto it, shoes still on, he moaned happily.

“Happy to not be sharing with me anymore?”

Alec glared at Jace, who stood in the doorway grinning.

“Hell yeah I am”, Alec said. “You kick!”

“Please”, Jace scoffed. “You loved every minute of it.”

Izzy joined him in the doorway. “Y’know since Magnus isn’t here to do it himself, I shall say it for him; the gay porno returns!”

Izzy squealed as she was chased out of the bedroom by a threatening wave of Jace’s hand. Alec watched her go with a chuckle.

“You alright, buddy?” Jace asked as he came to join Alec on the bed.

Alec shuffled over slightly to give him enough room to sit down. “Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?”

Jace rolled his eyes. “Oh I don’t know, you met a guy, fell in love with him and then broke up with him so… why don’t you tell me?”

Alec rolled onto his back with a groan. “I’m getting there. It’s not like there’s no chance for us.”

Jace nodded before slowly leaning down and lying on his back beside Alec. They both looked up at the ceiling, basking in the peaceful time alone together.

“You still working on it?”

Alec smiled ruefully but nodded. After a few minutes of silence, he sighed. “I think I’m gonna have to visit mom and dad.”

“Why’s that?” Jace asked monotonously. Alec was glad because he wasn’t sure he could deal with his brother’s disapproval right now.

“I promised Magnus I would try and… work through what’s holding me back. I think that they still are”, he said honestly.

Jace nodded solemnly; he had witnessed the devastating effect his parents virtually disowning him had on Alec and it had taken him years to move past it. Well, apparently he still hadn’t.

“I get it”, he said. “I’ll be there if you need me.”

Alec sniffled to withhold his tears. “Yeah”, he mumbled, choking up. “I might need you to be.”

Jace looked over at his brother and immediately noticed his quivering lip. Without saying anything, Jace reached across and pulled Alec into his arms.

Alec didn’t cry, but he did snuggle into his brother’s embrace gratefully. “Are _you_ okay?” he asked quietly, looking up at Jace.

Jace shrugged. “I’m getting there too”, he insisted. “Unlike you I know that it’s over completely for me and Clary so… I guess I’ve got the closure I need. I’ll always love her, y’know? But… its best for both of us if we both move on.”

Alec nodded; he was really proud of how selfless his brother was being to ensure Clary’s happiness. “And… does it bother you that she wants to move on with Iz?”

Jace tensed slightly, which made Alec panic, but eventually he shook his head. “I’d never stand between them. She’s my little sister”, he said, by way of reasoning.

Alec smiled into his brother’s chest. “She’s mine too. And I really wanna see her happy, Jace.”

Jace nodded in agreement. “Me too, Alec.”

“Then you should probably tell her that.”

Jace scrunched his nose up in confusion. “What do you mean?”

Alec managed to stop himself from rolling his eyes. “You need to tell her that it’s okay for her to be with Clary. We both know she won’t do it unless she knows you’ll be okay.”

Jace was silent but he nodded. “Yeah”, he mumbled, pulling Alec slightly closer. “Yeah, I’ll tell her.”    

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Really hope you guys liked that! I know its been a long wait :)
> 
> Onto the bad news though.... I've just found out that for the next 2 weeks I'm super busy. Like really really busy. Its only on the weekdays meaning I'll have weekends as per usual but that means I cant upload on weekdays. THEREFORE, I'm giving you guys 2 options:  
> 1) I post on saturdays and sundays  
> 2) I put the story on hiatus for 2 weeks and make some one-shots in the mean time before starting off the usual schedule again in 2 weeks time. 
> 
> Let me know which you would prefer in the comments down below or on my tumblr (justmagnusbane), I would REALLY like your opinions.
> 
> Either way, let me know what you thought of this chapter! The second part of the story starts next chapter, that being sunday, and I am SO excited to see how you guys react to a certain cliffhanger we have coming up.... it'd be the perfect time for hiatus *insert evil laugh here*


	18. Reuniting... Both Good and Bad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec attempts to get back into normal life, overwhelmed with the knowledge that Izzy has planned a trip to his parents. After seeking help from someone he least expected to approach, Alec gets the shock of his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't hate me for leaving you for a whole week on such a cliffhanger.  
> I'm just evil, get used to it ;)

 

 

 

* * *

Chapter 18

Over the preceding week, Alec focused mainly on getting back into the swing of things. He hadn’t been at work in over 2 months and it was vaguely disorientating. Returning to work, however, did provide him with a distraction.

Now, arguably distractions were the last thing he needed, especially if he ever wanted Magnus back, but he knew what it was he had to do and he didn’t particularly want to do it. So, avoiding the situation entirely was a far better solution.

“Raph, table 7 man, not 9!”

Raphael grumbled from across the bar While Alec couldn’t hear his moaning, he could blatantly tell from the look on Raph’s face that his friend was getting both annoyed and bored. As much as the job paid reasonably well and the company was normally friendly, it wasn’t a particularly fun job.

“So, Mr. How was the road trip?”

Alec turned to face one of his colleagues. She was a tall woman, dark cascading hair curled perfectly around her shoulder. She tended to wear heavy makeup but it somehow perfectly complimented the starch paleness of her skin. It was hard for Alec to deny that she was a beautiful woman.

“Hey Sasha”, Alec smirked.

Sasha and Alec weren’t to be identified as close friends but they certainly shared what little of a bond you could share between work friends. That you hadn’t seen in 2 months.

“It was good”, Alec said, nodding. “We did tons.”

Sasha grinned and slid towards him, leaning on the bar. “Oooh”, she drawled. “Like what?”

Alec smiled, remembering the days spent at the beach, amusement parks, museums. “Lots. We managed to get all the way to New York and we did pretty much everything big along the way.”

“Disney?”

Alec nodded.

“Grand Canyon?”

One more nod.

“Vegas?!”

Another nod.

“Wow, Alec!”

Alec couldn’t contain his grin. Sasha looked seriously impressed.

The pair continued to talk in between orders and customers, with Alec providing as much information as he could.

“Hang on, who’s this Magnus Bane guys because you’re totally blushing just saying his name?” Sasha giggled as she poured a beer just beside him.

Alec avoided her gaze and simply prepared his customer’s drink, handing it across the bar with a smile. “He’s no one.”

Sasha rolled her eyes exaggeratedly. “Alec, that’s BS and you know it!”

“Fine”, Alec grumbled, refilling the bowl of peanuts purely to have something to do. He needed to keep himself busy if he was going to talk about Magnus. “He’s this guy my sister works with… we… were kind of together.”

“Together?” Sasha gaped. “No way, Alec! You did not hook up and not call me to give me details! Traitor!”

Alec scoffed and attempted to ignore the feeling in his stomach at what she said. “I don’t ask you to call me every time you meet a hot guy”, he laughed. “Besides, we’re not together anymore.”

Sasha looked confused. She turned away from the bar and a potential customer, who wasn’t pleased at being ignored, in order to cross her arms and glare. “You really broke up already?”

Alec rolled his eyes. “Yes, and?”

“And why would you break up? You’re getting all flustered at his freakin’ name Alec!”

“We’re working through some stuff, okay? Then maybe…”

Sasha watched as Alec began to fumble. She slowly nodded in understanding. “Oh, I get it.”S She looked sympathetic and while Alec was never very pleased to see someone look at him in such a way, he smiled softly in an attempt to reassure her he was fine.

Sasha smiled back softly before getting back to work, leaving the topic of Magnus Bane all to itself.

“Hey dumbass”, Raphael said as he approached.

Sasha grinned. “Hey dick”, she teased affectionately.

If there was one person in the entire bar that Alec and Raphael got on well with it was Sasha. Alec wasn’t kidding when he said she called about hot guys, because she did, albeit not often. They didn’t do it regularly but hanging out outside of work wasn’t rare for them. Raphael was oddly fond of her too.

“How’s Sherman?” she grinned.

Raphael beamed uncontrollably. “Still as hot as ever.”

Alec rolled his eyes but deep down, he felt happiness for the pair. Despite how disgusting their love truly was.

Sometimes Alec forgot that he shared an apartment with Raphael… and then he was reminded… loudly.

In the time he had spent cringing, Alec appeared to have missed where the conversation headed.

“Up against the side of RV and everything!” Raphael laughed.

Sasha screeched. “No freakin’ way!”

Rolling his eyes once again, Alec piped up. “What in the world are you guys talking about? Raphael and Simon’s disgusting sexual adventures? Because trust me… there were a lot of them.”

“For you too apparently”, Sasha giggled uncontrollably.

Alec glared at Raphael, immediately understanding what story he had been sharing. “You’re an asshole, Raph.”

Raphael snorted. “I’m only sharing your “disgusting sexual adventures” with our dear friend Sasha”, he laughed. “What’s the harm?”

Alec resisted the urge to smack Raphael up the head. Instead he turned back to the customers, ignoring Sasha’s excitable response to each Magnus related story Raphael shared. All the while, he ignored the aching in his chest.

 

…

 

“The interview is Tuesday at 11.”

“You said you already had the job!”

Alec watched the scene unfold in front  of him with amusement. Jace had come home and immediately been attacked by Raphael, who was more than eager to get his couch back. Jace had insisted that he would be gone as soon as possible and that he had a job.

Well, he didn’t have it yet.

“Yes but c’mon!” Jace cried defensively, “We know I’ll get it. It’s perfect for me!”

Raphael rolled his eyes. “The only job you’re perfect for, Jace, is sleeping and farting you imbecile!”

Alec bit his lip to stop his laughter. “Alright guys, come on”, he called, forcing the two arguing men to stop talking. “We can figure this out, okay?”

It had now been 3 weeks since the end of the road trip and Jace had been staying with them since. Considering he had no job, Clary had been kind enough to let him keep all his stuff at hers until he found one. 3 weeks to Jace was nothing, and to be honest it was barely anything to Alec too, but to Raphael it was a lifetime and a half.

“Listen Raph”, Alec said sternly as he rose from his seat on the couch. “Me, Jace and Izzy are heading to my parents this weekend, so take the time to have Simon over or whatever the fuck you need to just… calm down. De-stress. When we get back on Monday, Jace will stay over and on Tuesday he’ll get the job and then, he’ll go. Okay?”

Jace grinned triumphantly and Raphael glared. Both men knew that Alec would have the last word.

“Fine”, Raphael hissed, turning on his heel and storming from the room.

Jace beamed. “Thanks, Alec. He’s kinda scary when he’s pissed.”

“Yeah”, Alec snorted. “You can say that again.”

Jace nodded thoughtfully as he slumped onto the couch beside Alec, who fell back into his seat gracelessly. He looked at Alec with something similar to worry but also hesitation.

“Look, Alec-”

“-I’ll be fine”, Alec interrupted hastily. “We’ll talk it out on the trip up there.”

Jace looked unconvinced. “But Alec, you haven’t seen them in, like, 7 years! Not properly at least.”

Alec bit his lip and forced himself to stay composed. Jace didn’t need to know just how terrified Alec really was. “I’m good, Jace. I’ll be fine.”

Jace was never one to miss the obvious signs of distress in his brother but he let them slide. Deciding to instead move onto a less painful subject than their parents, he patted Alec on the shoulder comfortingly before asking, “So, heard from Magnus?”

Due to his grip on Alec’s shoulder he felt his brother tense and felt an immediate sense of guilt at bringing it up. While it was less painful than their parents, that much was true, it was still pretty painful for the eldest Lightwood.

“No”, Alec mumbled. “Iz said he’s doing okay.”

Jace frowned slightly as he watched Alec look around nervously. “Just okay?”

Alec shrugged. “That’s what she said”, he supplied.

“It’s Izzy; you and I both know she would have said more than that.”

Alec groaned internally, of course Jace would pick up on that, being Izzy’s brother and all. “Fine”, he huffed. “She said he was okay but that he obviously missed me. She said he’s getting better with the whole bisexual thing and that he’s already confronted her to thank her for the support. But honestly, that’s all she’s said.”

Jace watched Alec closely. After a moment, he decided the only way to get a real emotion out of his brother was to keep prodding. “Clary went to his place last week”, he commented nonchalantly.

Alec raised an eyebrow but forced himself to nod absentmindedly. Jace rolled his eyes and continued.

“Yeah, she said his place was a mess; take out everywhere. As you can imagine, take out isn’t the best meal plan for a dancer.”

Alec purposely turned his back to Jace, deciding instead to watch the muted television with false interest.

Jace noted that Alec didn’t turn the sound back on and took that as a sign to continue talking. “She said he seems okay though. Apparently he even made a joke about a guy.”

“A guy?” Alec found himself asking before he could stop himself.

Jace nodded with a hum. “Oh yeah. Made some joke about sleeping with guys. Clary was pretty proud of him.”

Alec felt a similar feeling rise in his chest. Magnus had made a joke? About him and a guy?

Despite the flash of jealousy Alec felt, knowing that Magnus was growing more comfortable in his sexuality was refreshing, it was exhilarating.

However, it also reminded Alexander of how much Magnus was trying to work through, while he was cowering in a corner, hiding from his problems. Which again reminded him of his upcoming trip to his parents.

His parents had no idea he was coming, or that Jace and Izzy were too, but after 2 weeks of avoiding it, Izzy had taken it upon herself to plan a weekend visit. Alec had agreed in a moment of madness and now he regretted it, but trust his siblings to not let him back out.

“And they watched a movie.”

Jace said it in a way that eluded to something more and Alec’s curiosity got the best of him.

“So?” he said, in an almost-growl.

Jace smirked slightly. “It was a film about some gay couple. Apparently, or so Clary said, he seemed relatively comfortable through the whole thing, save the sex scenes.”

“What’d they watch?” Alec asked quietly.

“Brokeback Mountain.”

Alec snorted so loudly his throat physically hurt. He let out an obnoxiously loud laugh as he turned to Jace. “That movie is like... mostly sex scenes! That, and the sex scenes are pretty… intense.”

Jace quirked an eyebrow. “Of course you’d know”, he chuckled.

Alec rolled his eyes. “Beside the point Jace.”

“Yes”, Jace grinned. “Beside the point, Magnus seems to be getting a lot better with it all. So, how about you?”

“How about me?”

Jace was the one to roll his eyes this time. “How are you, Alec?”

Alec shrugged. “I could ask you the same thing.”

Jace grumbled impatiently. “You know that me and Clary are fine, Alec. Stop trying to change the subject.”

“I’m not.”

“Yes, you are, Alec!”

“No!” Alec insisted. “I’m really not. I’m just… eager to not have the discussion.”

Jace sighed in defeat. “Because you know it’ll include talking about mom and dad?”

Alec felt himself nod slightly.

Jace took a deep breath. “Alec, we’re seeing them in a couple of days, you have to talk about what’s going to go down.”

“No I don’t”, Alec said pathetically, trying hopelessly to convince his brother just one more time that the trip was unnecessary.

Jace groaned once more before insisting otherwise. “Alec, you don’t know what’s going to be said but I think you and I both know it’s going to be tough on you so you need to talk to me.”

“No I don’t”, Alec said again, more aggressively this time.

Jace felt himself growing angry. “Oh, okay so who _are_ you going to talk to? Magnus?”

Alec winced slightly but the anger simmering in the pit of his stomach forced him to move. He quickly rose to his seat and without another word, headed for the door. He ignored the sound of Jace shouting at him. Whether it was more hurtful comments or apologies, he wasn’t sure.

He didn’t care.

 

…

 

Alec knew he’d find himself here. Really, it was only a matter of time.

Destiny maybe.

At least that was what he’d call it.

Sitting outside of Catarina and Magnus’ loft, with directions thanks for Clary, Alec realised how stupid his decision to drive here was. Magnus was hardly going to want to listen and considering they hadn’t spoken properly in 3 weeks, it wouldn’t be surprising if Magus simply turned him away.

But then Alec was reminded of who Magnus really was and how unlikely he was to do such a thing.

Deciding that sitting outside only made him feel more stupid, Alec settled for knocking on the door.

It took a while but eventually he could hear footsteps. He could hear something that was clearly heels but whether it was Magnus or Cat was beyond him.

Eventually, after the equivalent of maybe a heart attack or two, Alec took a deep breath and plastered a smile on his face for whoever opened the door.

When the door opened, Alec was both pleased and anxious to see that Magnus stood on the other side.

He was dressed to the nines, in a well-fitting pair of tracksuit pants and an incredibly tight looking sports shirt. Although it wasn’t the most glamorous of outfits, it suit him well and did very little to hide his muscles. Alec took a moment to stare before reminding himself that the reason he was there in the first place was because he needed Magnus, but not in that way.

“Alec?” Magnus said in surprise. His voice was light, clearly nervous, and he shifted in the doorway awkwardly.

Alec was similarly unaware of what to say. “Hey, Magnus.”

Magnus swallowed dramatically before smiling. It was strained. “What- What are you doing here?”

“I hope you don’t mind”, Alec said, rushing to defend himself. “I asked Clary for your address because I just… really needed to talk to you.”

“To me?” Magnus asked, baffled.

Alec nodded. He was starting to feel the ever growing ache behind his eyes but he knew the last thing he could do was cry.

“Come on in”, Magnus eventually said, holding open the door with as genuine of a smile as he could manage.

Alec did so, walking into the loft and trying his best not to look around too much. He noticed the obvious touch of Magnus across the entire building from the expensive ornaments and designer rugs. But overall it was weirdly simplistic.

“Take a seat”, Magnus encouraged, nodding to the couch. Alec sat down and Magnus sat on the armchair across from him. “I’m listening.”

Alec nodded, feeling himself shake with fear. “It’s just that… Izzy has arranged this trip for us this weekend and… I don’t think I’m ready.”

Magnus didn’t say anything but Alec could see the sympathy in his eyes, meaning Izzy must have told him.

Alec felt his throat constrict. “I’m not ready to face them, Magnus”, he admitted lamely.

Magnus sighed. “I suspected you wouldn’t be okay with the arrangement the moment Izzy told me. Why don’t you think you’re ready?”

Alec shrugged, helpless to provide an answer. “I don’t know”, he whimpered honestly.

Magnus took a deep breath before rising from his chair and joining Alec on the couch. He sat as close to Alec as he could without hyperventilating and gently touched his knee. “Alec do you have any idea how strong you really are?”

Alec looked confused and raised an eyebrow at Magnus.

Magnus winced. “Seriously, you don’t believe me but you are so incredibly brave.”

“No I’m not Magnus”, Alec sighed under his breath.

Magnus rolled his eyes playfully. “How many guys do you think, would agree to go on a break because I wasn’t ready for us? How many guys would be brave enough to trust me like that? Trust that I wouldn’t turn around and ditch them?”

Alec scoffed slightly. “You say that like it’s some big heroic achievement Magnus.”

Magnus sighed once more. “What was it you said to me when I was scared about us being public?”

Alec rolled his eyes in frustration. “I don’t know, I said a lot.”

“Well one of the many things you told me was not to be ashamed of myself”, Magnus reminded gently, wrapping an arm around Alec’s shoulders slowly. When Alec simply slouched into his arms, Magnus tightened his grip. “You told me that my sexuality and my feelings were real and they were important and that anyone who said otherwise could go fuck themselves.”

Alec smiled gently, resisting the urge to hide his face in Magnus’ neck. “I can’t say that to my parents”, Alec laughed quietly.

Magnus grinned when he heard the familiar noise. “Oh if it comes down to it, I’m sure Izzy will say it for you.”

Alec scoffed. “You’re not wrong”, he said, grinning.

Magnus nodded before resting his chin on Alec’s head and humming. Alec smiled softly.

“Why did you come to me?” Magnus found himself asking.

Alec took a breath to restore his breathing. “I trust you. Not that I don’t trust the others but… you’re the one person who would understand me about this. About feeling bad about being… y’know.”

Magnus smiled sadly. “You _can_ say it, Alec.”

“I know”, Alec insisted. “Beside the point, you would understand best of all and… I guess I just needed to be reminded that you’re still there.”

Magnus pulled back to look down at Alec with a frown. “I’m always here, Alec.”

Alec nodded quickly. “I know! It’s just that we haven’t really spoken all that much and I was worried that maybe you-”

Magnus put his finger over Alec’s mouth with a small smile. Alec froze, watching him.

“I’m always here”, Magnus repeated, more firmly this time.

Alec watched him for a moment, feeling a familiar pull towards the man beside him. Perhaps it was stupid to assume that even after 5 weeks, the attraction between them would fade but Alec was still surprised by how noticeable the tension was between them. Looking into Magnus’ eyes after so long did however, calm him down and make him feel far better than before.

“Thank you”, Alec whispered breathlessly, overcome with the emotions he felt.

Magnus nodded slowly. “Anytime”, he vowed.

 

…

 

Several days later, at work for the last few hours before heading to pick up Izzy and Jace for their trip, Alec was reminded once more of Magnus.

And not for good reason.

He had been working the bar, wiping down the counter and scrubbing away at spilled drinks when Raphael approached him.

“Hey”, he said in greeting. “Have you heard we’re hiring?”

Alec nodded absentmindedly. “We were. Sasha found someone the other day.”

Raphael groaned. “Dammit, I was totally gonna get the spot for Simon.”

Alec laughed slightly. “Would it be the best idea to work with your boyfriend? What if you broke up?” At Raphael’s glare, Alec stammered out a defense. “Not that I think you will!”

Raphael rolled his eyes but seemed to reluctantly agree. “Beside the point, I like the dynamic here. We don’t need someone new coming here and messing it up.”

Alec scoffed. “You’re acting like it’s going to really be that bad. I’m sure whoever it is will be lovely. Especially if they’re related to Sasha.”

Raphael gaped. “They’re related?”

“Yep!” Alec said as he continued to clear behind the bar. Raphael watched him, fiddling with his empty drinks tray.

“Whatever”, Raphael grumbled eventually. “I’m heading out the back for my break, back in a few.”

Alec rolled his eyes, knowing that Raphael had already taken his break. Opting to ignore it, he turned back to the bar and began to take orders.

Not a moment or two later, Sasha burst through the bar doors and pulled a woman along behind her.

The woman was tall and her body was slender. She was curvy but in some strange way she was also sharp at every edge. Her hair was dark, a similar shade to Izzy’s, and it was swept behind her back so that it hung artfully around her. Her eyes were dark and slightly hooded, her lips plump and red with lipstick. Her smile was soft but her eyes were fierce.

Alec could see the resemblance between her and Sasha.

“Hey”, he greeted as they approached.

Sasha beamed, pulling her relative along. “Hi, Alec!” she said cheerfully.

Alec smiled at her affectionately before extending a hand to the newcomer. “I’m Alec”, he said welcomingly.

The woman grinned, reaching for his hand and giving it a firm shake. “Hi”, she smiled kindly. “I’m-”

“-Camille?”

Alec spun to face Raphael, who stood in the doorway of the bar that lead to the back. His face was contorted in anger and barely contained hatred. When he looked back at the newcomer he saw she was startled but that her eyes were flickering with recognition.

“Raphael?”

Alec looked between them in panic, trying to piece everything together.

Raphael’s face was red with the anger he was valiantly trying to contain. “What are you doing here?” he sneered.

Alec gaped. “Raph, don’t be an ass!”

Raphael glared at him; he look he sent his best friend was a warning. But it also looking like he was shocked too. “You haven’t figured out who this bitch is?”

Sasha gasped, her hands curling into fists. “Raphael, how dare-”

“-Think about it, Alec!” Raphael interrupted, ignorant of Sasha’s disgust.

Alec looked back at the dark haired woman, looking her over in his best attempt to recognise her. He didn’t.

Whoever it was, Raphael hated her. Alec wondered why, considering the only people Raphael hated tended to be someone who hurt the people Raph cared abo-

Wait.

...

Camille?

As in... Camille?

 

 

 

Well fuck.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Damn... I'm a bitch for leaving it here but... so what? HAHAHAHA 
> 
> Let me know what you think! 
> 
> See you saturday ;)


	19. What to do

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Magnus remains unaware as Raphael and Alec attempt to come to a decision on how to handle Camille

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back!
> 
> This chapter is kinda short but mainly because it's a filler. Tomorrow's chapter has the much mentioned trip for Alec, Jace and Izzy so that will be much longer. 
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
> WARNING: Quite a bit of swearing O.o

 

 

 

* * *

 

Chapter 19

After returning home from the trip, Magnus enjoyed slowly falling back into work. Dancing had always provided him with distraction and relaxation and even after 2 eventful months it continued to not fail him. He danced in his lessons, in between his lessons and even on his free days. Izzy grew almost concerned but eventually began to see just how much it was helping him.

And it was.

He was feeling so much better. Without worrying too much about Alexander, Magnus was able to focus on himself and how he was progressing. He was slowly becoming more comfortable in himself and had made a point of making jokes with his friends about his sexuality. Jokes always made Magnus feel lighter and lessoned tension and it continued to do so now.

Of course, Magnus did spend an awful amount of time wondering how Alec was doing and far less time asking Isabelle the same thing. She always confirmed that he was fine but that he was refusing to see their parents.

It hurt Magnus, in a way, to know that Alec was still refusing to confront his parents because he knew that was one of the many things holding Alec back. So when Izzy mentioned her idea to plan a trip and make Alec go, Magnus was both pleased and worried.

Izzy had immediately agreed to keep him updated, of course.

So with the only communication he had with Alec being through Izzy, he was more than surprised when said man showed up on his doorstep close to tears.

When Alec left, Magnus couldn’t stop the pride he felt; for Alec to come to him and openly discuss his fears about his parents was a huge step in the right direction and it made Magnus beyond happy. He made a point of texting Izzy to remind her to keep him informed due to the visit reaffirming his worry but apart from that he was looking forward to the trip, for Alec’s sake.

“Whatever you’re thinking about, stop”, Izzy instructed playfully as she paused the music.

They were both currently practicing a number to teach their shared class but to say Magnus was distracted was an understatement.

“You’re leaving tomorrow, right?” he asked.

Izzy nodded slowly, obviously confused. “Yeah, why?”

When Magnus didn’t respond, Izzy rolled her eyes. “Are you going to ask how he is again? Because I’ve already told you that he seems okay.”

“But he might just s _eem_ it”, Magnus argued.

Izzy smiled softly. “I know that you love him”, she sighed, “but you’ve gotta stop worrying about him. He’s a grown man, Magnus.”

Magnus grinned, narrowing his eyes. “Oh, I know. Trust me.”

Izzy squeaked in surprise before laughing loudly. “And you’re back!”

Magnus took the opportunity to wink playfully. “Never left darling.”

Izzy shook her head fondly before nodding to the stereo and pressing play. They began their routine again, both of them falling back into the comfortable silence of their dance, gliding around each other with precision. They danced as though they had been dance partners for years, knowing each other’s movements and reflecting them perfectly.

 

…

 

Magnus was surprised it took so long, but eventually Catarina cornered him. He had been expecting it, purely because he knew her so damn well.

“You have to talk to me, Magnus.”

“No, I don’t.”

“Yes you do”, Cat complained.

Magnus sighed deeply. “Look Cat, I’ve figured out by now that the best way for me to work through my shit is to do it alone and so far, it’s been working.”

Catarina looked disgruntled but she smiled slightly. “Then at least update me on how you’re feeling.”

Magnus rolled his eyes but agreed. “Just don’t turn all therapist on me”, he grumbled. Cat beamed, which encouraged Magnus to continue with his own smile. “I’m feeling a lot better. You guys have made a point of supporting me a lot recently and it’s been helping.”

Cat nodded. “You like to be reminded that we love you, then?”

Magnus smiled guiltily. “Maybe”, he chuckled. “It’s just nice to be reminded because it means that, even if only for a while, the worries and fears I have about you guys go away. Sure they return, but they come back weaker every time.”

Catarina looked ecstatic and the smile on her face widened. Magnus noticed a wetness to her eyes and was reminded of just how much he cared for Cat and vice versa.

“I’ll always love you Magnus”, Cat said, beginning to choke up. “Whether you’re banging a boy or a girl.”

Magnus snorted loudly at her vulgarity but grinned wildly. “Hopefully it’ll be both”, he smirked. He was proud of his he managed to slow the pattering of his heart and the blush on his cheeks as he said it. He made a point of keeping eye contact with Cat rather than looking away in shame and found that it made him feel even better when he caught sight of her prideful smile.

“Boy, oh boy, you’re almost there”, she teased.

Magnus shrugged. “Don’t get ahead of yourself honey, I still have to work on the whole Alexander thing.”

Cat nodded, eyes soft and sympathetic. “I know. But at least you’re slowly growing comfortable in your sexuality which is important if you ever want to be with him again.”

“Of course I want to”, Magnus said defensively. “Have you seen the guy?”

Catarina grinned. “Yeah, and he’s gorgeous.”

Magnus threw his head back to laugh wholeheartedly. “I know, trust me. But back off; I’m the one who likes girls, not him.”

Cat beamed once more. She had slowly grown to love these moments, when Magnus was so relaxed and carefree that his usual humour took over and he was able to joke about his sexuality without a second thought. It made her proud to know just how far he had come and how hard he had fought against himself to get there.

“I love you, Magnus”, she found herself saying.

Magnus looked up at her in surprise but eventually allowed himself to smile in return. “I love you more”, he responded affectionately.

In that moment, Cat knew that Magnus would get there one day. One day he’d be ready for Alexander and hopefully that day would be soon.

 

 

…

 

 

“What the fuck do we do?” Raphael hissed as he slammed the door to the staff room behind him.

Alec shifted uncomfortable, pacing the room and running his hands through his hair hazardously.

After figuring out who exactly their bar had hired, Raphael had dragged Alec away and locked the pair in the small staff room behind the bar. They had effectively left Camille and Sasha rather confused but the situation called for action, and fast.

“I don’t know!” Alec said breathlessly. “Maybe we should just call Magnus?”

Raphael perked up, instantly glaring down his best friend. “No way, dipshit! He’s been doing good, we’re not letting her take that away from him. Not again.”

Alec looked startled but after a moment of thought, nodded in agreement. Although he had only heard about Magnus’ improvement through others, he suspected it was far too great to risk ruining with Camille.

“But he’ll find out eventually”, Alec insisted.

Raphael shrugged. “Why will he? It’s not like he visits either of us at work.”

Alec resisted the urge to slap him. “If Camille is in the neighbourhood…”, he trailed off, hoping it might emphasise his point.

Raphael winced. “You’re right. Magnus and Cat live like 10 minutes from here.”

“Wait, really?”

Raphael rolled his eyes dramatically and swatted Alec’s arms to regain his attention. “Forget that, boy toy. We have more important things to worry about that how close your wanna-be bf’s house is to your work; you’re not sneaking off for quickies no matter how close he freakin’ lives.”

Alec _huffed_ but didn’t argue, refusing to give Raphael the satisfaction of knowing that he was at least partially right.

“Well then what do we do, genius?”

“It’s obvious”, Raphael insisted. “We kill her.”

Alec paled and jerked back in surprise. “We w _hat?”_

Raphael stared him down for a moment before his face broke out into a grin. “I’m kidding.  But that isn’t a bad plan as a last resort.”

Alec gaped at him. “Why am I friends with you again?”

“Because I set you up with my ex-brother slash best friend?”

“And the 5 years or so before that?”

Raphael shrugged but his eyes were alight with amusement. “Fuck knows.”

 

…

 

“It’s not like I actually did anything, I just said hi”, she sighed, shaking her head.

Sasha shrugged. “Look Cam, I have no idea what just happened. How do you know those guys?”

Camille looked disgruntled for a moment and her eyes narrowed slightly. “I don’t know the pretty one but I know Raphael.”

Sasha looked at her pointedly. “And?”

Camille shrugged. “I knew his brother or something in high school. We dated.”

Sasha looked confused. “Only dated? Because I’ve never seen Raphael that pissed. Bad breakup?”

Camille bit her lip but nodded, causing Sasha to raise her eyebrow in interest. “We didn’t end things on particularly good terms.”

“Okay. Still, that doesn’t mean that Raphael can talk to you like that.”

“Thanks for having my back, Sash. I swear, Raphael always comes up with a load of garbage just to make me look back so God knows what story he’s come up with this time", Camille said, smiling softly. 

Sasha frowned, feeling a weird protectiveness over her slightly younger cousin. She nodded thoughtfully, not entirely surprised at the idea of Raphael being a little harsh.

When the boys finally returned, the bar was becoming impatient and Sasha had long since taken over. Camille had taken a seat on a bar stool just across from her and was watching with interest. The normality of the situation seemed to irk Raphael for he immediately glared Camille down.

Approaching with commanding authority, he squared his jaw and looked down at Camille with disgust.

Sasha and Alec were quick to respond and follow him, careful to watch over him.

“I’m gonna say this and I’m only gonna say it once”, Raphael said threateningly. Camille looked completely unbothered by his tone. “If you so much as look at Magnus or even share his goddamn air, I swear to the messed up skys above that I will beat on you so hard your pretty little head concaves.”

Camille snorted. “Are you done yet?”

Alec tensed and stepped forward. “Raphael, back off.” When Raphael did so, Alec turned to Camille and looked at her with as much fury as his tired mind could muster. “Don’t hurt him”, he said, both desperately and demandingly.

Camille looked intrigued, tilting her head to the side as she appeared to inspect Alec. “Why would I?”

“Because you’re a little bitch!” Raphael hissed, stepping forward, only to have Alec stop him.

Sasha lept forward, eyes alight with anger. “Don’t ever talk to her like that again, you assholes!”

Raphael snorted. “Please!”

Sasha grit her teeth. “Seriously! You best explain or I swear we’ll have problems, Raphael.”

Alec looked behind Sasha’s small frame to Camille and noticed her eyes were firmly locked on him. He quickly looked away, her dark eyes too piercing for him to handle.

“Oh I’ll explain”, Raphael said sarcastically. “This bitch is the reason my brother is messed up and has been for the past… Oh I don’t know, _10 years_?”

Sasha, unsure what he meant and angered by his accusation, glared. “How so?”

Alec made a point of putting his hand on Raphael’s arm to calm his best friend down. As per usual, Raphael seemed to find comfort in the contact and took a deep breath.

When he spoke his voice was deeper and far more menacing. “Camille over there tried to _rape_ the gay out of him.”

Sasha stumbled back in shock and her eyes were wide with horror and disgust. She looked down at her cousin and watched as Camille looked confused. Camille sat back in her chair, face distorted in confusion.

If she was as confused as Sasha then surely Raphael was lying.

“That isn’t true”, Camille said firmly.

Alec looked across at Camille and saw something in her eyes akin to disgust and anger. She looked also genuinely confused. For a moment Alec had the thought that maybe Magnus had lied, but he knew deep down that Magnus would never do such a thing and that more likely than not, Camille still didn’t consider it rape.

Sasha must have seen the same thing in her cousin for she stood up straighter and stared Raphael down.

“If you _ever a_ ccuse a _nyone_ of such a thing ever again, you don’t want to know what I’ll do”, she warned.

Alec’s widened at her anger and even Raphael appeared surprised.

Sasha wasted no time in collecting her things and grasping Camille’s hand, dragging her from the bar with haste. Camille looked back at Alec from across the bar, anger and distaste evident in her gaze.

Alec had no doubts that Camille believed what she had done that night was the right thing and that Alec, who she had never seen before, had no right to get involved. But when it came to Magnus and protecting him, Alec would always be involved.

Keeping that in mind, Alec turned back to Raphael with sad eyes. Raphael was panting, teeth gritted in anger as he stared at the empty bar door.

“We have to tell him”, Alec sighed.

Raphael didn’t move or react in anyway besides a very quiet, “I know.”

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think! :D


	20. I Love You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec confronts his parents and Magnus and Alec begin to mend what is broken

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we go! Later than usual but... believe it or not, I recently got my nails done so typing this was incredibly slow due to my falsies... I'm not lying guys XD
> 
>  
> 
> ENJOY!
> 
> DONT YOU LOVE WHEN OUR BABIES ARE PROUD OF THEIR SEXUALITIES... COS I DO!
> 
>  
> 
> WARNING: homophobia

 

 

 

* * *

 

Chapter 20

When Izzy picked Alec up from the bar she knew something was wrong  but refrained from asking what, assuming it had to do with the trip they were about to take.

Jace was loud, attempting to defeat the nervous silence by loudly teasing and joking with his siblings. Izzy caught on and soon began to laugh along  but Alec remained quiet.

Never in his life had be felt quite as overwhelmed as he did now; his parents and Camille were the only thing boggling his mind besides his worry for Magnus. He had left Raphael at the bar, softly instructing him not to tell Magnus about Camille until Alec returned on Sunday. Alec wanted to take the weekend to work through his own problems before attempting to help Magnus out with his.

“How long has it been since you spoke to Max?” Jace asked, peering over into the front seat. Alec shifted in his seat, his grip on the wheel tightening.

“A while”, he said flatly. He refused to acknowledge exactly how long it had been since he spoke to his little brother; he had been too scared to talk to him in case Max shot him down with a newly developed hatred for him no doubt instilled by their parents.

Izzy rolled her eyes. “If  you’re gonna get this worked up over it, maybe you should just let me drive again. Don’t want you getting us into a crash.

Alec snorted. “I barely trusted you to drive to pick me up, let alone for 2 hours.”

“Harsh dude”, Jace smirked from the backseat.

Izzy kindly gave him the finger.

“Seriously though”, she began, “how scared are you?”

Alec sighed. “Of what?  Them throwing me out and disowning me because _news flash_ , they already did that.”

“Damn Alec”, Jace said. “Lighten up.”

“No thanks”, Alec couldn’t help but responding, clearly on edge.

Both siblings quietened down after that and let the sounds of the radio tune out any awkward silence.

To say the rest of the trip was tense was a very large understatement. However, by the time they finally pulled up to the house, it was even worse.

Izzy wasted no time in leaping from the hot car and brushing herself off, quickly followed by Jace who did the same.

Only Alec remained in the car.

“Come on, Alec!” Izzy hissed quietly, hoping to not draw attention to their arrival before they were ready.

Jace moved to Alec’s door and quickly opened it, pulling his lean brother out without a second thought. Alec was rigid with tension and frozen with fear.

“Alec?” Jace asked softly.

After a moment or two, Alec nodded slowly. It had been years since he had seen this place and even now the grandness of it was oddly familiar. Now used to a small, shared apartment, the large and elegant construction that was the Lightwood family home was vast and white, towering high above them in a way that was both exciting and intimidating.

Alec had always admired the nature that surrounded their home and returning reminded him of just how much; the vines of the plants around them had slowly grown over the years to wrap around the structure of the house, decorating it in an array of bright flowers and intricate weavings of plant life.

Approaching slowly with his siblings at his side, Alec attempted to catalogue his emotions in that moment; fear, and lots of it, apprehension, anger and surprisingly excitement. Perhaps the idea of seeing Max had hit him and it had dawned on him that his little brother was only a few hundred yards away.

“You ready for this?”

Alec turned to Izzy as they arrived at the door, facing its grand structure head on. Shrugging he said, “When else will I be?”

Izzy grinned encouragingly before raising a hand to the door and knocking sharply.

There were a few devastating moments of silence before footsteps could be heard; heels no less.

The door began to swing open and a voice became audible. “What in the world happened until being out until si-”

Alec’s heart plummeted when he saw his mother for the first time in almost a decade. She looked just as she did before but slightly more wrinkled. She had aged well none the less and her hair was still as dark as ever, shadowing her face in a way that still terrified him.

“-Alec?”

Her voice was quiet, surprised and tense as she spoke. Her body language became stiff and her eyes narrowed slightly.

Alec found himself unable to speak.

“Hello Maryse”, Jace supplied, drawing the attention away from Alec for a moment.

When he spoke, Maryse seemed to notice for the first time that her other children were present and she quickly pulled both into individual hugs, welcoming them warmly as she did.

“Oh look at you!” she gasped as she pulled back from her daughter who grew to look more and more like her every day.

Izzy smiled awkwardly before pointedly looking Alec’s way. Maryse got the hint and turned to her eldest son.

When she spoke to him again her voice was firm and her emotions tightly contained. “Hello Alexander.”

Alec was both saddened and angered at receiving such a detached response but knew deep down that he had expected it. “Hi mother.”

Maryse seemed to tense slightly at the name but nodded. “What brings you here? Max is out with friends.”

Alec could tell from her tone of voice that she wasn’t pleased. Deciding to be truthful regardless, he faked a smile. “I thought we should talk after all these years.”

Maryse remained frozen for a moment before nodding slowly. She hummed thoughtfully before carelessly flickering her head backwards to indicate they could enter.

The siblings did so, before following behind their mother as she glided across the floor to a room Alec remembered as his father’s study. He stayed back when Maryse knocked and explained who had come to visit.

After a pregnant pause, Robert Lightwood appeared in the doorway.

“Alexander”, he breathed, almost in awe. “It’s… good to see you.”

Alec nodded tersely. “You too Robert.”

Robert looked ready to protest but must have decided against it for he just nodded sadly. “Why are you home?” he asked softly.

Isabelle stepped forward with a bittersweet smile. “We all thought it best to talk. For the first time in a long time.”

Rober nodded sheepishly. “Of course.”

 

…

 

Within 10 minutes they were seated in the dining room, the siblings separated from their parents by a large mahogany dining table. Alec watched his mother from across the table and noticed how much more tense she was than his father.

“So, how are you?” Robert eventually said.

Alec sighed deeply. “I’m okay. I’ve found a place for myself, living with a friend. I, er… work at a bar down the street.”

Maryse couldn’t contain a quiet snort. It drew glares from everyone save Alec, who paled at his mother’s disapproving eyes.

“With how confident you were all those years ago about how you didn’t need us, I expected you to do a little better than that”, she said dryly, as though insulting her son’s entire life was no big deal.

It was to Izzy however and before Alec  could open his mouth to respond, she spoke.

“Don’t talk to him like that”, she said rather threateningly.

Maryse looked startled and disgruntled but made no further comment. Robert looked surprised but also equally… proud? Amused? Alec wasn’t sure what that look was.

“Alec doesn’t need your validation”, Jace said warningly as he stared down his foster parents.

Robert nodded in agreement but Maryse grit her teeth.

“Anyway”, Robert sighed. “What about you two?”

Jace appeared to calm slightly. “I’m out of a job at the moment but I have an interview for a small modelling gig on Tuesday?”

“Modelling?” Robert gaped.

Jace nodded enthusiastically. “It’s a new thing and its nothing big but its exciting.”

Maryse’s eyebrows arched. “Interesting”, she hummed. “Bigger than a bar, I suspect?”

Alec winced slightly at the blow and despite wanting to, Jace didn’t come to his defense, knowing the entire trip was about Alec learning to do that for himself.

Izzy broke the silence. “And I still dance. Teach it now.”

Robert perked up, smiling gently and looking impressed. “I’m glad you succeeded in that path, Isabelle.”

Izzy smiled softly, unsure, but felt happiness seep into her bones when her father smiled back. “I love it”, she promised wholeheartedly.

“So”, Maryse interrupted harshly, eager to cut to the chase. Her eyes were locked on Alec, who was watching the table nervously. “Are you still… you know.”

Alec tensed uncontrollably. He slowly met his mother’s eyes. “You mean… gay?”

“I mean delusional”, she spat, stiffening in her chair.

The entire room fell silent and for a moment Alec waited for Izzy to spit fire but soon enough saw both his siblings glaring but containing themselves.

They wanted him to stand up for himself.

Grimacing to the point where it was almost a sarcastic smile, Alec turned to his mother. “It’s great”, he said. “Being delusional makes for great sex.”

Maryse straightened up tensely and Alec vaguely heard Izzy gasp in surprise. “Alexander! How dare you come int0-”

“-No”, Alec interrupted loudly. “How dare you!”

 Maryse’ eyes widened in her rage. “You have some nerve to return where you are unwanted and spread such filth around.”

Alec fought against the fear that bubbled inside of him and attempted to meet his mother’s eyes. He was tired of being stepped on by her.

“My sexuality isn’t filth”, he insisted.  

Maryse snorted in disgust. “Of course you’d say that”, she sneered.

Robert looked exceptionally uncomfortable. “Maryse-”

“Perhaps our eldest child needs a reminder of where his place is”, Maryse hissed.

Alec felt his eyes moisten but felt a strong sense of confidence surge through him. In that moment he thought of Magnus and just how happy he could be if he stopped being stepped on.

“It’s not under your heel, that’s for sure”, he piped up.

Maryse’ eyes darkened, narrowing menacingly. “Please”, she sneered. “Even that is too good for filth like you, Alexander. Family disappointments are no longer family and get far worse than the bottom of a heel.”

Reminded horrifically of his mother’s words on the night he was thrown out, constant repetitions of what a disappointment he was, Alec froze.

“Back the hell up”, Izzy threatened quickly. “Don’t you dare talk to him like that you manipulative little bitch.”

“Isabelle”, Robert mumbled quietly. “Language.”

Jace snorted dramatically. “Seriously? You’re as bad as she is! All you ever do is roll over and let the shit hit the fan. It’s pathetic!”

Robert looked devastated at his words but did little to prove them wrong. Alec wasn’t surprised in the least.

When Maryse turned back to him, her voice was darker and more menacing. It was scarily calm. “I suggest you leave this house”, she warned. “Now.”

Alec shook his head in determination. “Not until I say what I have to say.”

Maryse looked prepared to interrupt but Isabelle shot her down with a startlingly powerful glare.

“First of all”, Alec began. “I don’t care what you think of my sexuality. You can hate it, you can claim it doesn’t exist, hell you can even claim I chose it but at least I know deep down that the one thing you’ll never be able to do is invalidate it.”

Maryse’s fury was evident and her face was distorted with disgust but she remained silent.

“Second of all, I came here tonight knowing this would be the outcome. I knew all along that you would _never_ move past my sexuality. I did, I knew”, Alec said. “I didn’t come here tonight in the hopes that you might love me again. No, I came here tonight not only to stand up to you but to give you one last chance. Not for your sake, but for mine; so that I can know in the future that I did everything I could for you and that it was _you_ who destroyed this. _Not_ me.”

The silence was deafening and made Alec both terrified and strangely proud of himself for commanding such attention. He saw his mother’s disgust and disinterest and knew he would never get through to her. He saw his father’s hurt and knew that he had already gotten through to him. And he saw Jace and Izzy’s pride and knew that it fuelled him.

“Last of all, I forgive you”, he said simply, voice weak. “Not because you deserve it but because I refuse to let you hold me back anymore.”

Saying the words effectively released their hold on him and in that moment Alec felt such relief as the weight of his parent’s fell from his shoulders. The pain they caused would never go away but even if just to spite them, Alec would sure as hell ensure no more damage was done.

In that moment, it dawned on Alec just how much he had grown since trip. He had spent the entire time convinced that only Magnus was improving but if tonight proved anything, it proved that Alec was free of their control and that he’d done a hell of a lot of growing.

It also proved that perhaps he _was_ ready for Magnus.

 

 

…

 

 

The relief was strange. For the several hours they drove to return home, Alec let Izzy drive, allowing himself time to process what had happened. It was strange to realise that what you thought had been holding you back never really was. It was both amazing and horrible at the same time.

To say that Alec was relieved… well.

When he arrived home after dropping Izzy off, Jace in tow, he had cried all his tears, stifled all his sobs and felt all of his pride.

Now he was just tired.

He and Jace were perfectly silent as they headed to Alec’s apartment, entering quietly, aware of how late it was and how Raphael was no doubt asleep.

Well, that was what Alec thought. But from the bright light of the main room it was clear he was wrong.

Alec and Jace approached quietly, both tired beyond words.

“It’s 3am Raph, why are you still-”

“Hi.”

Alec blinked in surprise as though doing so would correct his vision and Magnus wouldn’t be standing in his living room. At 3am. On a Saturday.

Magnus was a mess; mascara caressed his cheeks, staining pathways into his skin. His face was sunken and grey and his clothes were askew and untidy. He looked at Alec with moist eyes and dark circles, lower lip quivering.

“I-”, Alec stuttered. “I… What are you doing here?”

At 3am.

When Alec wasn’t even supposed to be home.

Magnus smiled sadly, his eyes wet and glued to Alec in all too familiarly affectionate way.

Jace coughed awkwardly, nodding to Alec’s room. “I’ll leave you to it”, he said nervously before darting to his brother’s room to escape.

Alec watched him go, thankful for the distraction for it gave him a moment to breath.

"Why didn't you tell me Camille was here?"

Alec turned back to Magnus in shock, startled by the abrupt question. He took a moment to process the fact that _Magnus knew about Camille._

"Did Raphael tell you?”

“No, but it doesn’t matter. It only matters that you didn’t”, Magnus sighed.

“I only found out earlier today… and it’s not exactly like we’re talking Magnus"

Magnus scoffed, the sound startlingly loud in the awkward silence that settled between them. "We're not talking, huh? Oh so we're only talking when you need me, then?"

Alec looked puzzled. "Excuse me?"

"Oh you know!" Magnus said with false sincerity. "When you showed up at my door close to tears because you were scared of confronting your parents? What if I was scared of confronting Camille? Were you there for me?"

Alec was baffled; the last thing he had expected when arriving home from his trip was Magnus sitting in his apartment with more than a few choice words. But to blame him for Camille's appearance was far from fair.

"You can't blame all of this on me, Magnus", Alec demanded.

Magnus snorted. "I'm not, you imbecile. I’m just upset. I’m even a little angry because while I was at home worrying about you, I was blissfully unaware that she had returned and when I did find out…. I had to deal with all of that... Alone."

Alec winced as he heard Magnus' voice slowly lose its steadiness as it became more and more strained. Alec could blatantly hear the tears slowly forming in Magnus' eyes just from the tightness of his voice.

"I had to do that alone, Alec. When I was there for you with your parents... I- where WERE you?"

In that moment, Alec knew that there was more to it than Magnus let on. No doubt seeing Camille was awkward and startling but in those moments Alec realised that seeing her face again after so long must have triggered something in Magnus; memories, most likely. Perhaps even feelings of doubt and self-hatred. And that was what was hard. Not seeing Camille, but the consequences. And Magnus had been abandoned to deal with them alone, to deal wth the emotional backlash all by himself.

Magnus wasn’t asking him about where he had physically been and in that moment Alec realised that perhaps he did effectively abandon Magnus when he didn’t tell him. He hadn’t given Magnus the opportunity he deserved to prepare himself and he had pointedly made Raphael do the same too, inadvertently.  

"I said... Where were you?" Magnus asked, voice laced with tears.

Alec watched as Magnus crumpled, his knees weakening until they collapsed from under him. Reacting without any conscious thought, Alec caught the man in his arms and wrapped Magnus in his embrace, as though the tighter he held him the more protected he would be. For all the times everyone had said Magnus was improving, Alec had never expected him to crumble so easily under the first sign of stress. Maybe it showed Alec what he feared all along; that Magnus' improvement was all an act.

"Where were you?"

His voice was barely a whisper now but it echoed so loudly in Alec's ears that it hurt his head and made his throat constrict. The pain Magnus was feeling felt as though it was passing directly onto Alec with every gasp and cry Magnus released. With every sob, Alec was reminded of how much Magnus hurting, hurt him.

"I'm sorry", Alec mumbled. "I thought it would be better for us in the long term for me to focus on my parents rather than Camille. It worked though; I confronted them.”

Magnus smiled genuinely for a moment. “I’m proud of you”, he whimpered.

Alec felt tears prick at his eyes. “I'm sorry I wasn't there. What happened?"

Magnus’ breath halted for a moment. “Nothing”, he insisted, his sniffling slowly growing louder as he fought to control his sons.

Alec didn’t believe him but he didn’t pry, knowing it would do more harm than good.

After a few minutes, Magnus took a stuttered breath. "I’m sorry”, he said, laughing humourlessly. “I don’t know what got into me. You were busy dealing with your own thing… I get it, I just needed you…. This just reminded me that I really needed you."

Alec smiled ruefully, tightening his arms around Magnus and allowing them to slowly slip to the floor. Alec leant back against the wall, Magnus settled into his side and breathing deeply against his neck. 

"Is that a bad thing? That you need me?"

Magnus chuckled dryly. "No, it's not a bad thing. Also not a good thing though."

Alec nodded in agreement. "Yeah, it's pretty messed up."

Magnus smirked, sniffling once more. "It's mad that 3 months ago I didn't know who you were and now I can't ever imagine not knowing you. I feel like I always have."

"Oh really?" Alec whispered teasingly, lost for any other words.

Magnus nodded slowly, burying his face further in Alec's neck. "I feel like every person I ever loved up until now was a stepping stone until I reached you. You're my prize."

Alec laughed both nervously and affectionately. "Am I a good prize?"

Magnus smiled against the skin of Alec's neck, the wetness of his tears smearing against his skin. Alec giggled quietly at the contact, voice laced with his own still drying tears.  

"You're the best prize ever", Magnus mumbled, his voice slowly growing more and more thick with sleep. Alec watched as Magnus' body slowly drained of energy and began to sink into his side, effortlessly falling deep into sleep.

Alec watched the way Magnus' face moved, albeit kind of twitched, as he slept and found himself smiling. Sure they weren't together just yet, and sure they might never be, but right in this moment, with Magnus by his side and in his arms, Alec _felt_ together. He felt whole.

“I love you”, he found himself whispering.

Magnus didn’t stir and slowly Alec fell asleep beside him.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think!! Are you as excited as I am for MALEC rebuilding? AND WHAT DO YOU THINK HAPPENED BETWEEN CAMILLE AND MAGNUS?


	21. I Love You Too

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Flashback to Magnus' encounter with Camille and how it motivates him to take what he wants.... and what he wants is Alexander.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Simply put, Alec and Magnus have been apart now for almost 7 chapters... I think its about time that ended, don't you? ;)
> 
>  
> 
> WARNING: SLURS AND HOMOPHOBIA

 

 

 

 

 

* * *

 

Chapter 21

_Earlier that day_

“What would I text him though?”

Raphael shrugged, not really paying attention to Magnus who was sat on his and Alec’s couch opposite him. They were both watching a movie.

Well, Raphael was at least.

“I don’t know what to text! I wish I’d just managed to catch him before he left”, Magnus sighed, eventually deciding to toss his phone aside, without sending off a text.

Raphael rolled his eyes. “Alec will be fine. He’s got Izzy.”

“And Jace”, Magnus added absentmindedly.

Raphael snorted obnoxiously. “Like Jace makes any difference. We both know Izzy is the one with the balls big enough to stand up for Alec.

“You’re too harsh on Jace”, Magnus insisted. “I’m not his biggest fan but even I can appreciate his… charm.”

Raphael looked offended at even the concept of Jace being considered tolerable and quickly turned back to the television.

Alec, Izzy and Jace had left a couple of hours ago after Alec’s shift and Magnus had headed over to see Raphael when he got home. It was around 11 o’clock at night and the pair had been sitting and talking for hours now. Which coincidentally meant that Raphael had been keeping his mouth shut about Camille for hours.

And it was killing him.

Not telling Magnus was horrible; not only did he surprisingly feel bad, but it was also really annoying because with every passing moment Raphael prayed that Camille didn’t conveniently fall out of the sky. He had made a deal with Alec to wait until he was home before telling Magnus but the worry was settling deep in his chest and making him really uneasy.

“What are we doing for dinner?” Magnus piped up from the couch.

Raphael looked away from the TV screen and glanced at Magnus. He was completely free of makeup or hair products, which was beyond rare but also showed Raphael just how far their relationship had come for Magnus to be so comfortable around him. Magnus was lounging in a pair of sweats and a loose fitting shirt, slouching back on the couch typing away at his phone.

“I don’t care”, Raphael said simply as he returned his gaze to the screen. Growing impatient, he turned to Magnus. “Goddammit Magnus, watch the freakin’ movie.”

Magnus startled, his eyes torn from his phone for the first time in hours. He looked baffled for a moment before finally switching off his phone and depositing it beside him.

“Sorry”, he mumbled, turning to the TV. “We don’t hang out often, I should be paying attention.”

Raphael refused to feel sympathy. “Yeah, you should”, he said scornfully. The only thing that reassured Magnus was the slight twitch of Raphael’s lips as he shot Magnus a look.

They managed to get through just 20 more minutes of the movie before Magnus was complaining.

“Seriously Raph! I’m hungry!”

Raphael, having heard the same complaint one too many times, glared at Magnus before carelessly tossing him a $20 dollar bill.

“Get food then you idiot”, he hissed angrily.

Magnus grinned triumphantly as he snatched up the bill from where it had fallen to the floor. Stuffing it in his sweat’s pocket, he headed to the door with glee. “I’ll get you something”, he called over his shoulder.

“Don’t come back”, Raphael said in return.

It didn’t take Magnus long to reach the restaurant down the road. The Ethiopian place just down from Raphael’s had become a favourite of Magnus’ in the last few weeks and he had begun to frequent it often. Luckily they did take away.

He placed his order without too much thought, sure that Raphael would eat just about everything. While he waited for his order to be cooked, he decided to bide his time in the convenience store just across the road.

Warning the worker that he would be back soon, he headed across the road to the convenience store. It was a small store and appeared to be more of a local than anything bigger.

It definitely felt larger on the inside than it did on the outside and for a few minutes Magnus spent his time pacing the aisles for snacks. When he finally picked out a few snacks, he headed to the cashier with a grin.

The woman behind the till was friendly and was incredibly beautiful. Her striking blue eyes and dark ebony hair reminded Magnus all too much of a certain sexy individual who even the thought of managed to distract Magnus to the point where he forgot to pay.

He was brought back to reality by a sharp voice behind him.

“Don’t worry, I’ll get that”, the voice said.

Magnus registered a hand reaching across his shoulder to drop money into the cashier’s hand. Baffled, Magnus remained silent.

“So what’s your name cutie?” the woman behind him asked.

Magnus tensed; that voice sounded all too familiar and the alabaster skin of the arm that reached over him looked startlingly similar to that which plagued his nightmares.

Spinning abruptly at the revelation, Magnus came face to face with someone he hadn’t seen in over a decade.

Camille looked just as she did before however her face was sharper and her chest had filled out all the more. It was oddly distracting just how large her bust had grown.

Tearing his eyes from said area, Magnus glared at her dead in the eye.

Camille’s eyes lit up when she realised who it was and she made a noise similar to a squeal.  

“Magnus!” she grinned. “How are you? Raphael said you were in the neighbourhood.”

Magnus tensed. Raphael had known? And he hadn’t said anything?

“What the hell are you doing here, Camille?”

Camille put her hand to her heart and gasped. “That’s rude”, she commented flippantly. Magnus grit his teeth as she giggled. “I’m just here, Magnus. No reason.”

“There’s always a reason for everything you do, Camille. Even if that reason is fucked up”, Mangus said vehemently.

Camille nodded in agreement but after a second she froze. Looking Magnus deeply in the eye, she remained frozen for a moment before slowly breaking out into a grin. “You’re still holding that silly night at Joshua’s party against me, aren’t you?”

Magnus took a deep breath to calm himself. He had always wondered how he would feel if he and Camille ever spoke of that night and now he knew the answer was… horrible. He felt like his entire world was hanging on a thin strip of thread, the inevitable break looming over him.

“What you did was wrong”, Magnus said simply, refusing to reveal his feelings on the matter.

Camille threw her head back in laughter. “No it wasn’t!” she squealed. “It was precisely the _right_ thing to do.”

Magnus raised his eyebrows in surprise; even after all these years she was still delusional.

“I tried to help you, Magnus”, she insisted dramatically. “I wanted to save you.”

“Save me?” Magnus snorted. “No, you wanted to… to rape me and laugh about it with your friends later.”

Camille rolled her eyes. “I can’t r _ape_ you Magnus. That doesn’t happen to _guys!”_

Magnus gaped at her but so no evidence that she was lying or joking. Meaning she truly believed that only women could….

Magnus tensed even further, eager to escape the conversation but he knew deep down she wouldn’t let him. He’d have to force his way out.

“Besides”, Camille piped up, flickering her hair behind her neck. “You should thank me for at least _trying.”_

“I should _thank you!?”_  Magnus growled in disgust and disbelief.

Camille nodded. “Uh-huh.” She looked around her for a moment, eyes looking incredibly hollow and emotionless. Her head rolled on her shoulders and it reminded Magnus of Alec when he was drunk. Maybe Camille was drunk.

“Oh!” she gasped, obviously excited about a sudden revelation she had. “So, you don’t believe my methods work, right? Well, what about that baby faced friend of yours!”

Magnus furrowed his eyebrows in confusion; did she mean Raphael? Who had known about Camille… and was going to get killed when Magnus finally got home.

“What’s his name?” Camille asked herself. “Either way, that sexy, broody guy is definitely in love with you. He got so defensive, it was adorable! Maybe…”, she paused to think dramatically. “Maybe my methods didn’t work on you but what about him?”

Magnus, in his shock, took a moment to digest what she was suggesting. “I swear… if you touch Raphael I will kill you.”

Camille looked confused but she giggled. “Raphael? No, not him idiot. He’s not in love with you.”

Magnus managed to school his features despite his confusion. He wasn’t sure who she was talking about but it was clearly someone that she had come across, someone who had known who she was and had defended him.

Well, the only other man who knew about Camille was Ragnor, and of course Alec.

Alec.

“Sexy, broody guy”, Camille had said. That did admittedly sum up Alexander pretty perfectly.

Turning his gaze to Camille and sporting the most deadly look he could, he pinned her to the ground with his eyes. “If you lay a hand on him, I won’t even kill you… I’ll do so much worse.”

For a moment Camille actually looked scared but slowly she smiled. “How sickly!” she said sweetly. “You love him too!”

Magnus felt fear stir in his stomach at the idea of Camille knowing about Alexander. Considering how last time turned out, how the last time he had confided in her she had turned on him, claiming that he couldn’t possibly have moved on with W _ill._ With a _guy._ How she had tried to “fix” him.

Slowly, he thought of where Alec was right now. Alec would have arrived at his parents not long ago and would have most definitely confronted them by now, confronted them about the abuse they delivered upon him. Thinking to his own psychological abuse at the hands of Camille, Magnus was reminded that he and Alec were actually in very similar situations; confronting the people whose memory, for years, had continued to chip away at their self-worth until there was nothing left. Sure Alec was never sexually assaulted by his parents but they too had denied his identity and attempted to change it, before pushing him to the side like a broken toy.

So if Alec could confront his parents, why couldn’t Magnus confront Camille?

“Don’t you?” Camille asked, leaning closer towards Magnus. “You’ve become a fag again, haven’t you? He’s broken you, just like Will. You know…. he even looks a little like Will too.”

Magnus tensed, determined to defend Alexander, but found that his throat wouldn’t work. He just… couldn’t.

“He is gorgeous though, I’ll give you that. At least you have good taste even when you’re a homo.”

“I’m not gay.” Magnus’ eyes widened as he realised what he had said, surprised he had actually managed to say it.

Camille titled her head to examine him before she burst into laughter. “Oh I almost forgot about your adorable “neither-here-nor-there” stage!”

Magnus frowned. He was so sick and tired of her having this much control over him. It was time she lost that control.

“Fuck you”, Magnus said simply. “Yes, I’m in love with him, yes I’m bisexual and yes, you’re a manipulative bitch whose obvious daddy issues and psychological problems have poisoned you so extensively that you walk around thinking you’re better than everyone else. Well guess what honey… you’re not. So leave me the fuck alone.”

Walking away quickly before she could respond, Magnus completely avoided collecting his dinner and headed straight back home. He ignored the racing of his blood and the adrenalin in his veins, determined to get back to Raphael’s. He needed to talk to him.

 And he needed to see Alexander and…. stop being scared.

 

…

 

_The Next Morning_

 

Alec woke up slowly, aware of an ache in his neck and back. As he arose, he looked around him and began to realise just why his body ached.

Magnus was still asleep, curled around his side and holding on tightly like a baby panda. Said position had meant Alec’s head had fallen to Magnus’ in the night, leaving a major chink in his back.

After pulling out from under Magnus slowly, Alec stretched his back and rubbed his eyes to wake himself up.

“Morning sunshine”, Raphael greeted sarcastically from the doorway. “What brings you and Jessica back so soon?”

Alec looked down at Magnus once more before heading off towards the kitchen, confident Raphael would follow.

“Did he call you?”

Alec turned to face Raphael and frowned. “Who? Magnus?”

Raphael nodded.

“No”, Alec said slowly, worried. “Why?”

Raphael shrugged in a poor attempt to look like he didn’t know. “Just thought maybe that’s why you were home.”

Alec shook his head. “No, my mother kicked me out”, he said simply.

Raphael looked saddened by how casually Alec spoke about said situation but nodded in understanding. “Sorry to hear that.”

“I’m not”, Alec snorted. “Only sad thing about it is that I didn’t see Max.”

“Jesus Alec”, Raphael sighed, watching his best friend closely. “You okay, man?”

Alec looked to him and smiled softly. “Of course”, he promised. “I’m fine. Although I can’t say I’m not crapping myself over what to say when Magnus wakes up.”

“Well what do you want to say to him?”

Alec snorted. “A lot”, he said sadly. “I don’t know… I need to tell him about what happened with my parents…. I-I think I’m ready, Raph.”

Raphael looked pleasantly surprised at Alec’s words, relieved that his friend was finally in the right place. Disguising his pride and happiness, he decided to instead tease his best friend. “Or you could just say hello”, he smirked.

Alec rolled his eyes. “Not funny, Raph”, he chided. “What do I say to him?”

“Hello would do just fine”, a voice called from the hallway. Magnus waltzed into the kitchen just a few seconds later. “Morning beautiful”, he greeted flirtatiously.

Alec couldn’t contain his blush, thinking back to their conversation and closeness last night, and quickly turned back to the pulling out his cereal and pouring himself a bowl. He pushed away the panic he felt at the idea of Magnus possibly overhearing Alec’s admission but from Magnus’ carefree nature it would appear he didn’t.

Raphael looked between the pair before rolling his eyes. “Oh not this again!”

Magnus turned to him from where he was making himself a coffee, and furrowed his eyebrows. “Not what again?”

“This!” Raphael shouted, gesturing between the two men. Alec looked equally confused as Magnus. “I can’t be dealing with all this lovey dovey do-we, don’t-we crap!”

Alec smirked slightly. “You don’t have to worry about that so calm down.”

Raphael spun to face Alec, startled. “Oh yeah?”

Alec nodded. “Yep”, he said simply.

Magnus looked intrigued as he approached from the other side of the room. He crept up behind Alec, purposely resting his hands against Alec’s hips and leaning towards him as he spoke. “Oh really?”

Alec shivered slightly but Magnus’ firm grip on his hips kept him from collapsing under the weight of Magnus’ words. In that moment, Alec questioned why they were still holding back from one another when they clearly wanted each other so badly. But were they ready?

Magnus ignored Raphael’s look of disgust and leant closer, his breath falling directly on Alec’s neck. “Why won’t he have to worry, Alexander?”

Alec tensed at his words, feeling an all too familiar feeling at the way Magnus whispered his name. To save himself the embarrassment, he quickly pulled away from Magnus and coughed to clear the air.

“I just meant that there’s no ‘will-we, wont-we’ drama, that’s all.”

Magnus grinned, going back to making himself coffee. “So then Alexander, which one is it?”

“Huh?”

Magnus smirked playfully at Alec’s confusion. “Will we… or won’t we?”

Raphael immediately groaned loudly. “Uh! This is like the most vanilla foreplay I’ve ever seen! Please stop!” he cried as he quickly fled the room.

Alec watched him go quietly, knowing that he was attempting to give the pair space, before bursting into laughter. “Wow”, he chuckled breathlessly.

Magnus’ usual smirk fell back into place as he slowly approached Alec. “Now he’s gone”, he said playfully, watching Alec’s smile grow. “Why don’t you answer my question?”

Alec shrugged helplessly. “Why don’t you?”

“Because you didn’t ask the question, I did”, Magnus said.

Alec grinned tightly but looked down at his feet sheepishly. After a moment he looked up at Magnus and saw the hesitation and anticipation in the man’s eyes. In that moment, Alec realised that this was Magnus giving him the decision, leaving it up to him. Magnus was clearly ready and clearly wanted him, but he was handing Alec the cards to play them however he so desired.

 “I don’t know”, Alec mumbled. “I mean… I, er… I- I want to… y’know.”

“Alec”, Magnus interrupted softly, noticing Alec’s nervousness. “Answer the question.”

Alec looked at Magnus and immediately understood what he meant. He turned his body to face Magnus’ more, allowing Magnus to slip closer to him before he spoke. “Um…. will we”, he whispered eventually.

Magnus grinned slowly. “Will we”, he agreed.

Alec watched for a moment as Magnus leant closer before closing his eyes on instinct. When their lips met for the first time in months, Alec moaned helplessly, sinking into Magnus’ arms. Magnus cornered him against the counter, quickly growing more and more aggressive in his advances.

Alec sighed against Magnus’ lips, wrapping his arms tightly around Magnus to pull him closer. Magnus began to hungrily plunder Alec’s mouth, having absolutely no regard for the two other people present in the house.

Alec felt the ground disappear from under him and immediately wrapped his legs around Magnus’ waist. Throwing his head back, Alec moaned. “I love how strong you are”, he said breathlessly.

Magnus set Alec on the counter and grinned. “Why thank you darling”, he teased.

Alec smirked before leaning in, using his legs to pull Magnus impossibly closer. Magnus quickly diverted his attention to Alec’s neck, knowing how much of a weakness it was for him.

Alec sighed as Magnus began to pepper his neck in kisses. Every lip, suck and bite made his body turn just slightly more into jelly.

“I love you Magnus”, he moaned uncontrollably as he gripped Magnus’ back tightly.

Magnus immediately pulled back, startling Alec and making their heads collide. Alec gasped, grabbing his head and rubbing it.

Magnus winced, touching his head gently but the shock on his face was still there. And it wasn’t from the head bump.

“What did you just say to me?” he whispered in disbelief.

Alec looked up at him, hand still soothing his throbbing head. He looked confused for a moment before he seemed to remember what words he had uttered in the heat of the moment.

“I er…. I love you?””

Magnus remained frozen, eyes wide and growing wet. “Do you or not?”

Alec looked deep into Magnus’ eyes. He was scared admittedly, but the feeling of euphoria that overcame him when saying those words completely overcame whatever nervousness or fear he was feeling.

“I love you, Magnus.”

Magnus stared. Slowly, as the seconds passed, his eyes began to water and his lip trembled. “Y-You love me?”

Alec felt his own eyes growing wet. Nodding, he smiled slightly. “Yeah. I love you.”

Magnus remained frozen, unsure what to do. Slowly, he moved closer once more, resting his hands on Alec’s thigh. Looking up at Alec up on the counter, he took a deep breath. Looking Alec’s face over with obvious desire, Magnus licked his lips and his eyes darkened.

“God I love you too”, he growled, launching himself towards Alec and hungrily attacking his mouth. Alec gasped in surprise but that only allowed Magnus to slip his tongue into Alec’s mouth and claim every inch of it for his own. He devoured Alec’s mouth, so desperate to hold him that he grew impatient with the distance between them.

“Magnus”, Alec gasped, pulling away. Magnus immediately attacked his neck with the same fervour and Alec had to take a deep breath to steady himself. “Magnus”, he moaned, helplessly baring his neck to him. “We should… we should- uh!”

Magnus bristled with pride as he heard Alec moan. Pulling away quickly, he mumbled a hurried, “bed”, before lifting Alec into his arms and carrying him out of the kitchen.

Quickly realising Magnus’ mistake, Alec took a deep breath and pulled away. “No”, he gasped. “We can’t… Jace and… and Raphael”

Magnus looked confused for a moment before it dawned on him; they were not going to have sex for the first time with Jace and Raphael in the house.

He slowly let Alec fall back to his feet, the younger man panting uncontrollably for a moment.

“It’s probably for the best”, Magnus said softly. “I want to take you out to dinner first.”

Alec grinned slightly. “I like that idea.”

Magnus nodded pleasantly. “And before we do anything, we have a lot more to discuss about… y’know, sex.”

“I know”, Alec agreed. “But for now can we just…. Not? Just not yet.”

Slowly Magnus nodded. “Of course. But we should still talk…about everything else.”

“I know”, Alec repeated. “C’mon, I want to tell you about my visit to my parents.”

Pleasantly surprised by Alec’s openness, Magnus followed Alexander with a grin firmly in place. He was so excited about not only the prospect of being with Alec but also with communicating better, and this was Alec’s attempt to kick start that better communication.

Magnus drew closer to Alec as they walked, grasping his hand tightly and pulling the younger man into his arms. Alec chuckled softly and leant against Magnus as they walked, passing Raphael and Jace who were sat on the couch poorly pretending not to have heard them.

Alec led them to his bedroom, collapsing on the bed and making space for Magnus to fall beside him and that was how they stayed for hours as they spoke. They shared their feelings, both good and bad, about their breakup (although they did avoid the sex discussion for now) and shared with each other how they had grown over their time apart. Alec told Magnus about his parents in more detail and Magnus eventually opened up about his past and his recent run in with Camille. They both supported each other, holding the other when things grew tough and basking in each other’s happiness when the conversation was light.

Slowly, with each story and admission they exchanged, they grew both emotionally and physically closer until Alec’s final story about his parents ended with Magnus pulling him into a gentle kiss.

Alec basked in their closeness, knowing this was a brand new start for their relationship. He allowed Magnus to kiss him until he was breathless and then some, and he loved every moment of it.

“Aku membuat janji untuk menunggu untuk Anda. Saya katakan saya akan.”, Magnus whispered against his lips.

Alec smiled slowly. “You know, I did look up what you said before; that you'd wait for me.... What did you say then?" 

Magnus shrugged playfully. "It's... nothing." After a moment, Magnus sighed dreamily. "Aku cinta kamu , Alexander." 

"I love you too, Magnus”

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You love me, don't cha? ;) 
> 
> What Magnus said btw: 
> 
> Aku membuat janji untuk menunggu untuk Anda. Saya katakan saya akan = I made a promise to wait for you . I said I would.
> 
> Aku cinta kamu = I love you
> 
>  
> 
> LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THOUGHT GUYS :D 
> 
> (Regular updates are now back in action, so the next chapter will be uploaded on Monday and then Wednesday, and so on. I'll stick to the schedule as best as I can but follow my tumblr for updates on when and if I post).


	22. Clizzy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Izzy grows jealous of Magnus and Alec and realizes that she still very much wants Clary

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you can imagine, this chapter title is inspired by good old episode 12. Creative title, right?

 

 

 

* * *

 

Chapter 22

“Did he tell you exactly what happened?” Raphael asked as he began to sort through crates of drink.

Alec, across the bar, grimaced slightly. “Yeah, he did”, he confirmed. “He told me the gist of what she said.”

The pair were getting ready to open up the bar for the day and therefore, inevitably see Camille. As managers of the bar they were first in, and took the opportunity to discuss Magnus and Camille’s encounter and how to deal with her, before she arrived.

“How is he now?”

Alec shrugged slightly. “I don’t know. I’ve texted him and he seems okay.”

Raphael raised an eyebrow. “Why didn’t he just stay the night?”

“We’re trying to take this a little slower than before”, Alec sighed. “Meaning we want to date before we’re officially together.”

Raphael looked disgusted by the idea but nodded slowly; the last thing he wanted to do was mock Alec for his and Magnus’ need to take things slow.  “Sounds lovely”, he said sarcastically.

Alec rolled his eyes fondly before heading off to the front of the bar to open up. The look he sent Raphael was clearly one of warning as the sharp clicking of heels soon met his ears, alerting them on who had arrived.

Raphael grit his teeth but nodded to Alec, promising to behave.

Sure enough, not a moment or so later, the door to the bar opened and Camille and Sasha slid inside. Sasha looks disgruntled to be there and refused to make eye contact with Alec when he smiled. Camille on the other hand, looked exceptionally happy to be there.

“Good morning colleagues”, Camille said in what was obviously false sincerity.

Alec managed to somehow contain his anger. After hearing Magnus’ side of the story yesterday, having held him tightly to comfort him when the insults grew too painful to repeat, Alec harboured such hatred for Camille that he was honestly proud of himself for not having killed her yet. Camille walked with such confidence and determination that it only reminded Alec of how manipulative and sneak she really was.

“How was your weekend… what is it, Alec?”

Alec spun to face Camille and met her gaze with a cold stare. “Yeah. That’s me”, he said simply, voice void of emotion.

Camille looked thoughtful for a moment and nodded, grinning in a way that was vaguely sinister. "Okay _Alec_ , how was your weekend?”

The way she over pronounced his name made him cringe but he smiled nonetheless. “It was… eventful.”

Camille looked vaguely pleased. “Really?”

“Yes.”

The monotonous tone of his voice obviously made it very clear to Camille how little he cared for the conversation, for she soon turned away and began to great the customers than filed in slowly. She was admittedly a natural charmer and was soon ringing in orders left right and centre.

Alec felt intense rage but somehow managed to contain it as he watched her flit around the room with ease. He greeted his regulars and allowed himself to be distracted by work and the reassuring texts from Magnus throughout the day.

 

…

 

“Put it away, Prince Charming”, Isabelle teased as she waved goodbye to their last student of the day. The second their lesson had ended, Magnus had been on his phone.

Magnus smirked. “Sorry dear, can’t help myself.”

Izzy smiled softly, glad to see Magnus happy. While it was necessarily a rare occurrence, it was always nice to be reminded he was on the mend. “I’m glad you and Alec are back together”, she said honestly.

“And I’m glad you decided to come in today even though you didn’t need to. I really don’t know how I would have handled all those- ”

Magnus suddenly looked up, looking only slightly panicked and shaking his finger. “We’re not using that word yet dear. Nuh-uh.”

“What? Together?” Izzy gaped, “Why?”

Magnus rolled his eyes slightly and sighed. “We’re taking it slow, okay?”

“You’re still together!” she protested.

Magnus shrugged helplessly. “Leave our relationship alone, woman!”

“Ah ha!” Izzy giggled wildly. “So you admit you’re in a relationship?”

Magnus rolled his eyes once more and began to head back to his office. When he got there, he slumped into his seat, eyes fixated on his phone.

 

From Alec (13:06)

_Flirting with a customer. Urgh._

From Magnus (13:06)

_Why is she flirting with a customer? Just get the order and go!_

From Alec (13:08)

_Not much I can do about it besides cringe sweetheart_

 

From Magnus (13:09)

_Do us all a favour and never call me that again?_

 

From Alec (13:09)

 _Why_?

 

From Magnus (13:11)

_It’s really cute and I hate cute_

 

From Alec (13:12)

_Damn. Well okay._

_Sweetheart._

 

From Magnus (13:12)

 _Screw you_.

 

From Alec (13:14)

_Pretty sure your bitch of an ex already is_

 

From Magnus (13:15)

_EXCUSE ME?!_

 

From Alec (13:18)

_Not like that, Mags. I mean she’s screwing me over by chasing away my customers._

From Magnus (13:19)

_You mean they aren’t all drooling at her advances? Gasp!_

 

From Alec (13:20)

_Did you? ;)_

 

From Magnus (13:21)

_Damn Alexander! That hurts, it really does._

 

From Alec (13:21)

 _Sorry_.

 

From Magnus (13:21)

_Don’t be, I’m over that bitch._

 

From Alec (13:24)

_Glad to hear it ;)_

_Are you okay though?_

 

From Magnus (13:25)

_Me? Why wouldn’t I be?_

 

From Alec (13:27)

_Texting means I can’t tell if you’re being sarcastic or not :(_

 

From Magnus (13:30)

_I’m fine Alec. Honestly._

 

From Alec (13:31)

 _I don’t believe you_.

 

From Magnus (13:32)

_I know you don’t._

 

From Alec (13:34)

 _Can I come to your place tonight_?

 

From Magnus (13:35)

_What happened to taking it slow? ;)_

 

From Alec (13:42)

_I want to be there for you tonight._

 

From Magnus (13:36)

_Nothing is wrong, Alexander_

 

From Alec (13:43)

_We’ve already established that I don’t believe you._

 

From Magnus (13:41)

_Fine. Bring your gorgeous ass over to my place at approximately 7._

 

From Alec (13:42)

_I’m leaving my ass at home since you’re not getting it anyway_

 

From Magnus (13:45)

_I’m allowed to look, just not touch darling ;)_

 

From Alec (13:46)

_Urgh. This whole taking it slow thing was really stupid_

 

From Magnus (13:47)

_No, it wasn’t baby._

 

From Alec (13:49)

_No… it wasn’t._

 

 

…

 

It had been a while since Izzy had seen Clary. Not a huge amount of time, but at least a few weeks. The pair hadn’t actively avoided each other but with ties between Jace and Clary almost completely cut, save for Jace still technically living with her, they had grown apart slightly. That’s not to say that Izzy didn’t like Clary as someone other than her brother’s (ex)girlfriend but outside of Jace they had never been hugely close.

That was a lie. Of course they had been close.

Perhaps Izzy was just trying to convince herself that the fact she hadn’t seen Clary in weeks was completely normal and beyond her control. In reality, it was neither.

So now, going to see Clary for the sole purpose of seeing Clary felt foreign to her. How she had ended up at Clary’s doorstep was beyond her.

Clary opened the door slowly, holding a long and very wet paintbrush between her teeth and multiple canvases under her arms. Izzy immediately moved to help her.

“Oh my gosh, what are you doing?” Izzy laughed softly as she carried a group of canvas’ for her.

Clary grinned. “Thanks”, she said breathlessly, shutting the door behind her. “I was just tidying up. Jace wanted to come over and pick some stuff up so I was just sorting through my stuff. And… painting at the same time.”

Izzy beamed at Clary, overcome with affection for her and just how cute she was.

“Did you hear about Magnus and Alec?” she asked, by way of distracting herself from how kissable Clary looked with paint streaking her face.

Clary looked confused as she rolled up her sleeves. “No, what happened?”

Izzy smiled slowly. “What do you think?”

For a moment Clary looked baffled but soon enough she gaped. “No way!” she squealed. “Oh my god, I’m so happy for them!”

Izzy nodded in agreement. “Me too!” she laughed.

Clary, in her excitement, wiped her hand across her face and ended up spreading a small ball of red paint across her entire cheek and lower lip. Izzy thought nothing of it and moved to wipe it away immediately, only to become frozen when she realised that her thumb was gently running across Clary’s lower lip.

“Sorry”, she mumbled, pulling away quickly.

Clary looked startled for a moment but quickly busied herself with making drinks. Izzy followed her to the kitchen, sitting on one of the stools as Clary hastily prepared a drink.

“So, er, when did they get back together?”

Izzy snorted slightly. “Well they’re apparently ‘not using that word’ but only last night.”

“Oh yeah!” Clary said suddenly. “Weren’t you guys supposed to be at your parents?”

Izzy nodded sluggishly, as though reluctant to discuss it. “Yeah we were but my mother basically kicked us out. Alec and I decided to head back to work today. He says he’s not bothered but I think he wanted to keep himself busy.”

Clary nodded. “Understandable. I just… feel so bad for him, y’know?”

“Yeah”, Izzy sighed. “He got dealt a tough card.”

Clary finished preparing the drinks and slid the coffee toward Izzy with a tentative smile, who took a low sip, despite the heat. Izzy felt Clary’s eyes burning a hole into her face and turned to her friend, raising an eyebrow in question. “What’s up, Clary?”

Clary looked uncomfortable. “Why are you here, Iz?”

Izzy looked offended, to which Clary gasped. “No! I didn’t mean it like that! I swear!”

Cracking a smile to reassure her, Izzy ignored the voice in her head that continued to ask her the same thing. “It’s fine”, she assured. “I just… I don’t know… wanted to see you.”

Clary looked thoughtful for a moment and nodded slowly. “Why’s that?”

Izzy ignored the racing of her heart and shrugged as nonchalantly as possible. “I haven’t seen you in a while?”

“That’s sounds like more of a question than an answer”, Clary teased harmlessly.

Izzy panicked slightly. “I missed you”, she rushed out, looking for the most truthful excuse she could muster.

Clary smiled gently, reassuringly. “I missed you too, Izzy.” Izzy grinned in return. “But don’t you think this is a little weird since… y’know, the beach?”

Izzy’s face dropped immediately and she quickly rose to her feet. “I can go”, she insisted, the tension in the room slowly suffocating her.

Clary quickly moved and grabbed Izzy’s wrist to stop her fleeing. When Izzy turned to face her, Clary dropped her hand. “That’s not what I’m saying”, she said. “I just meant… it’s not bad weird, just… weird.”

Izzy nodded slowly, still unsure. “I really can go, I don’t mind.”

Clary shook her head firmly. “I don’t want you to”, she insisted. “I’m glad you’re here. I’ve missed you too.”

There was something in Clary’s eyes that told Izzy that the redhead wanted to say more than she did but Izzy did nothing to force it out of her, instead smiling in an attempt to sooth Clary’s nervousness.

“How… How have you been?”

Clary straightened up slightly at the question and sighed. “Good, all things considered. It’s a little empty in here though.”

Izzy looked sympathetic. “What are you going to do when Jace finally moves out? Will you be able to afford the rent?”

Clary shrugged helplessly. “Not if I can’t find a roommate.”

“Damn”, Izzy sighed, feeling useless. “I hope you find one.”

“Me too”, Clary laughed melodically.

Izzy stifled at the noise and felt the sudden urge to escape. “Anyway”, she said abruptly as she moved to leave. “I better go because Magnus and I have another late night kids class tonight at 6 so, I need to leave.”

Clary looked confused. “It’s only 4:30?”

Shrugging, Izzy looked towards the door and began to shuffle towards it awkwardly. “We need to… er, y’know… plan the music.”

Clary’s lips were curled in amusement but her eyes showed pain. Ignoring the ache that caused in Izzy’s own chest, the youngest Lightwood turned to leave quickly.

“Sorry Clary!” she called behind her. “I’ll see you soon!”

Clary heard the resounding slam of the door and felt her breath escape her in a pant. Looking down at her hands, she wondered when all of this had become so complicated.

 

…

 

“Have I ever told you that I hate girls?”

Magnus raised an eyebrow and snorted loudly. “Not really, why?”

“Because I do”, Izzy said firmly.

Magnus finished filing away their CDs used that day, their last lesson finally over, and turned to her with a soft and vaguely sympathetic smile. “Clary?”

Izzy rolled her eyes. “Oh, how did you guess!”

Magnus cracked a grin at that. “Who knows?” he teased, playing along.

Izzy laughed slightly before sliding down the wall and slouching against the glass mirror of the dance studio. “I don’t know what to do. She’s just so…. pretty.”

Magnus nodded in agreement as he joined Izzy on the floor. “That she is, cupcake. That she is.”

“And it’s not even a subtle kind of pretty, it’s a full blown distraction sort of pretty”, Izzy complained dramatically.

Magnus quirked a smile. “Why don’t you just be with her already?”

“No way”, Izzy said immediately. “I would never do that to Jace.”

Magnus rolled his eyes out of habit, having heard that excuse an awful lot over the past few weeks. “He’s fine with it and you know it.”

“No I don’t”, Izzy argued. “Besides, I don’t care if he says he’s alright with it, I know he’s not.”

Magnus sighed softly. “What’s brought this on anyway?” he asked instead, giving up on his earlier prompt.

Izzy shrugged. “I don’t know”, she said honestly. “Probably just jealous.”

“Jealous?”

“Of you and Alec”, she clarified. “I guess you two getting back together reminded me of the trip.”

“We’re not to-”

“-Yes you are.”

Magnus took a deep breath. “Yeah”, he sighed uselessly. “We are.”

Izzy frowned but didn’t say anything else, obviously lost in her own thoughts. Magnus caught sight of the clock and winced when he realised that Alec would be getting to his loft in just under 15 minutes.

Slowly, Magnus rose from the floor and after sticking out his hand to help her up, pulled Izzy up into his arms. She sank into his arms as though they were a second home, sighing at the comfort of his embrace.

“Thank you Magnus, for everything.”

“No problem cupcake”, Magnus said softly. “Now, I have to go”, he began as he pulled away, “but don’t give up on her.”

Izzy smiled ruefully, remembering when she had said similar words to Magnus in regards to her brother. Nodding, she watched with a small smile as Magnus headed out to no doubt rush home. She was more than happy to say that she definitely approved of Magnus.

“Love you!” she heard him call out over his shoulder as he left.

Izzy’s heart swelled just a little and despite the fact that he could no longer hear her, she returned the sentiment with a smile.

Standing by herself in the dance studio, the silence settling around her, Izzy thought of what Magnus had said.

“Fuck it”, she said firmly, pulling out her phone and dialling Clary’s number.

When Clary answered, Izzy didn’t hold back.

“Hello?”

Only momentarily stunned by the softness of Clary’s voice, Izzy took a deep breath and said what she needed to say.

“Clary, I’m in love with you.”

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHERE MY CLIZZY SHIPPERS AT?
> 
> Let me know what you all thought down below! ;)


	23. Growing Closer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Izzy and Clary seek advice from their friends while Alec spends the night at Magnus' loft.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains some adorable Clizzy panicking, some even more adorable Malec bonding and some.... hotter Malec moments ;)
> 
> WARNING: sexual happenings, although nothing extreme or explicit

  


  


  


* * *

Chapter 23

“You know you’re allowed to kiss me, right?”

Magnus scoffed slightly, refusing to look at Alec and focusing purely on the TV. “You’re the one who told be I’m not even allowed to look, let alone touch”, he said defensively.

Alec snorted and shifted on the couch to face Magnus more. “I was joking and you know it.”

“Or do I?” Magnus asked sarcastically. He looked across at Alec and felt himself inevitably smile; trying not to smile when looking at Alec was incredibly hard to do.

Alec rolled his eyes before sighing dramatically. He lifted himself from the couch and headed towards the door of Magnus’ loft. “I guess I’ll head home then, since I _did_ only come here to get laid.”

Magnus knew that Alec was only teasing but allowed himself a moment to smile at the thought of Alec growing more comfortable with the idea of sex. Not for his benefit, but for Alec’s.

Magnus quickly sprung from his seat and followed out to the hallway. Grabbing Alec’s wrist to stop him leaving, Magnus grinned at the squawk of surprise Alec let out. Magnus pulled Alec into his arms, wrapping the younger man in his embrace.

Alec smirked slightly as he pressed his forehead against Magnus’. “Are you going to kiss me or not?” he teased quietly.

Magnus grinned. “Or not”, he whispered, abruptly pulling away from Alec. Alec rolled his eyes, clearing not surprised and allowed Magnus to drag him back the couch with a carefree smile.

“Speaking of kissing…”

“What?” Alec asked as he sat down beside Magnus, sinking into his arms and sighing contently.

Magnus sighed. “Your sister is still very much confused about Clary.”

“Isn’t she always?”

Magnus smirked. “She is but that’s beside the point” When Alec nodded in agreement, Magnus pressed a soft kiss to his forehead before continuing. “Jace needs to talk to her about it.”

“I know”, Alec sighed deeply. “I’ve asked him to but he hasn’t. When I get home tonight I’ll remind him.”

Magnus hummed but pulled Alec closer into his arms. He lent down to press his lips softly against Alec’s ear before whispering “why don’t you stay the night?”

Alec took a deep breath. “I want to but you know I shouldn’t.”

“Who says anything will happen though!” Magnus said.

Alec shrugged. “It’s for the best and you know it.”

“Fine”, Magnus said grumpily. “But just know that you’re breaking my heart just a little bit.”

Alec shook his head, smiling fondly. “Shut up”, he mumbled.

Magnus raised an eyebrow at Alec. “Oh really? Shut up? Really?” At Alec’s laugh, Magnus pushed on Alec’s shoulders, sending him back to lay on the couch. Laying on top of him, Magnus began to kiss down the side of Alec’s face, from forehead to chin, basking in Alec’s laughter.

“Stop Magnus!” Alec giggled. “Stooppp!”

Magnus continued. “No way”, he vowed.

“God I hate you”, Alec sighed, voice light with amusement.

Magnus snorted against Alec’s cheek. “No you don’t.”

“You’re right; I love you. Although I’m not sure why exactly.”

Magnus growled playfully as he began to kiss and lick at Alec’s skin even more. Alec chuckled, attempting to push Magnus away but proving powerless. Magnus laughed against Alec’s lips and he kissed his way across them.

Alec couldn’t help himself and quickly kissed back, which managed to distract Magnus enough. While Magnus began to reciprocate Alec’s kisses, Alec took the opportunity to hook his legs around Magnus’ waist and flip them. Rather than be surprised, Magnus simply laughed against Alec’s mouth, before going back to kissing him deeply.

 

…

 

Raphael groaned, running a hand through his hair tiredly as he watched Izzy pace through his and Alec’s living room, mumbling worriedly to herself.

“Y’know”, Raphael sighed, interrupting her panicked mumbling. “This situation wouldn’t even be happening if you had actually have given her a chance to respond before _hanging up.”_

Izzy shook her head fiercely. “I know! It was so stupid!”

Raphael snorted. “You can say that again.”

Izzy rolled her eyes and attempted to ignore Raphael as she continued to pace. She had arrived at Raphael’s less than an hour after making the call in order to see her brother, only to be reminded that he was at Magnus’.

“Can you please just call him again?”

Raphael groaned loudly and dramatically. “Izzy! For all we know your brother is currently getting laid… he didn’t answer 2 minutes ago and he won’t answer now.”

“You don’t know that”, Izzy protested meekly.

“Izzy”, Jace sighed from where he was seated beside Raphael, much to his chagrin. “Why did you even hang up on her?”

“Because it was a stupid thing to do!” Izzy cried, heartbroken. “I should have never called her in the first place, let alone tell her that!”

Jace bit his lip, taking a moment to think of what to say. “But w _hy d_ id you hang up, Iz?”

Izzy paused in her pacing for a moment and looked down at Jace with slight confusion. The look Jace gave her clearly told her that he was looking for an answer further inside of her than she was willing to look but the determination in his eyes told her he wouldn’t take a half-assed answer.

“I panicked”, Izzy sighed. “I was just thinking about her and how much I want to be with her but then, when I called her I just…. realized I couldn’t just… say that.”

“Why?” Jace prompted again.

Izzy shrugged. “I don’t know!” she said angrily, clearly worked up. “I just realized the consequences of telling her.”

Jace watched his little sister restart her pacing and shot Raphael a look. Raphael looked at him expectantly, nodding his head over to Izzy when she wasn’t looking. Jace sighed, rolling his eyes, but nodded.

“Izzy”, he said softly. “You know that I’m okay with all this, right?”

Izzy froze, immediately looking over her shoulder at her brother with scepticism written all over her face. “What?”

“I’m okay with it”, Jace repeated. “I want you to be happy, and honestly, I’m getting over Clary pretty well so far. Seriously Iz, it’s okay for you to be with her.”

Izzy took a breath before spewing out excuses. “Yeah but you aren’t even fully moved out of her place and I know that you thought she was the love of your-”

“Izzy!” Jace interrupted loudly. Izzy’s mouth clamped shut and her eyes widened slightly as she watched Jace rise from his seat on the couch and approach her.

Gently taking her shoulders in his hands, he squeezed them reassuringly. He smiled. “It’s okay, Izzy. I want you to be happy. I want you to be with Clary.”

Izzy searched her brother’s eyes hastily for any sign of hesitation or regret. When she found none, she nodded ever so slowly. “Are you sure?” she asked, voice tight and weak.

Jace smiled softly as he nodded. “I’ve never been more sure of anything.”

Izzy seemed to take a moment to absorb what Jace had said. Nodding slowly, she drew Jace into a tight hug, burying her face into his shoulder with a sigh.

“Finally”, Raphael groaned. “Now get out of the way of the TV!”

 

…

 

Alec laughed, digging his nails in deeper. Magnus quickly swatted his hands away.

“Ow!” Magnus shouted playfully as he pulled Alec’s hand away from his abs.

Alec smirked. “I totally underestimated your abs”, he laughed.

Magnus smacked Alec’s head lightly.

They were laying on the couch, Magnus laying with Alec's head pillowed on his shoulder. Magnus wasn’t entirely sure how they approached the topic, but somehow abs had been mentioned and Alec had asked for a reminder of what Magnus’ were like. Something in the air was slowly growing more and more electric as the night progressed and Magnus had no doubts that it was due to their time apart. Time with coincidentally made Alec desperate for physical contact again.

Which of course let to him testing just how hard they really were.

“I haven’t seen your abs since that day at the beach”, Alec said, smiling. “I missed them.”

Magnus laughed breathlessly when Alec winked. “What happened to you being all shy?” he said teasingly.

Alec shrugged, grinning. “Maybe being alone with you relaxes me, makes me more confident.””

Magnus smiled softly and lent down peck Alec’s all too inviting lips. “I love you”, he said once more.

“I know”, Alec said as he smiled. “You’ve reminded me an awful lot since yesterday.”

“That’s because I love saying it.”

Alec hummed in thought. “Say it again then.”

Magnus raised an eyebrow. “No”, he said. When Alec gasped out a laugh, Magnus bit his lip to contain his smile. “I don’t want to say it anymore, because you judge me _for_ saying it.”

Alec rolled his eyes. “You’re such a drama queen”, he snorted as he pulled himself free of Magnus’ arms and headed to the kitchen. “Want a drink?” he called behind him.

“Martini?” Magnus shouted. He heard Alec scoff loudly. “Fine! Coffee please.”

Magnus watched Alec disappear behind the corner towards the kitchen and felt himself smile. The immense swelling in his chest was distracting but also extremely welcome after so long denying his feelings for Alec. Since their breakup, things had both improved and not improved but overall Magnus was glad their break happened.

He was more glad, however, that it had now ended because every moment that he spent with Alec reminded him of their time together on the trip. The feeling he got in the pit of his stomach whenever Alec laughed or smiled or made a terrible pun, told Magnus quite clearly that the feelings he had for Alec were far more intense than anything he had ever felt before. Magnus wasn’t entirely used to being this involved and this desperate for someone’s affection but it was strangely nice… in a completely unexpected kind of way.

Magnus was brought out of his daydreaming when his phone began to ring. The shrill noise made him wince but he reached across to answer.

“Hello?” he said cheerfully as he answer.

The voice on the other end made him frown.

“Magnus?”

Magnus tensed slightly, leaning forward in his seat to brace himself. “Clary? Are you okay?”

Clary sniffled on the other end, her voice cracking slightly. “Izzy called me”, she gushed, tears evident in her voice.

Alec returned with two drinks in hand. When he saw the look of worry on Magnus’ face he raised an eyebrow. Magnus simply shook his head and nodded for Alec to sit beside him.

“What did she say? What’s wrong?”

Clary let out a cry. “She…. She told me that she loved me, Magnus. W-What do I do?”

Magnus gaped and looked across at Alec in shock. Alec furrowed his eyebrows in confusion and shrugged helplessly. “What’s wrong?” he mouthed.

Magnus continued to stare. “She did?”

Clary hummed an affirmative. “What do I do, Magnus? She hung up on me straight after.”

“Well”, Magnus sighed, rubbing a hand across his face; so much for a night alone with Alexander. “Go to her place and confront her. She can’t hang up on a real life conversation.”

“Yes but what do I say when I get there!”

Magnus frowned. “I don’t know! What do you want to say?”

Clary made a panicked noise on the other end of the line which made Magnus smile slightly. “I don’t know!”

“Well, do you love her back?” Magnus said, in a tone that suggested the answer was obvious.

Clary sighed deeply. “You already know the answer to that Magnus.”

Magnus grinned. “Well then go and tell her that! What’s the worst that could happen?”

“She could reject me”, Clary insisted quietly, her voice growing softer and softer as she calmed herself down.

“She just told you she loves you, I doubt she’ll reject you”, Magnus said sarcastically.

Clary giggled softly. “Yeah. I just… what if she loves me but doesn’t want me, y’know?”

Magnus sighed. “I don’t know what to say, Clary, to convince you that she does. She wants to be with you.”

“But are you sure?”

“Yes, I’m sure. She’s flat out told me herself, biscuit.”

Clary chuckled on the other end at the nickname. She took a deep breath before exhaling loudly. “Okay”, she said, her voice strong with determination. “I’ll go and see her and I’ll just tell her how I feel. Yeah. Yeah… I’ll do that.”

Magnus smiled. “Good. You go girl!”

Alec looked across at Magnus and grinned. Magnus winked in return, which inevitably caused Alec to look away with a blush.

“Can I ask though”, Magnus said softly, returning to his conversation with Clary. “How come you called me and not Simon?”

Clary laughed lightly on the other end. “You and I know Simon wouldn’t be helpful right now; he’d just fangirl instead of giving me advice. And it’s not like I’m going to call Jace and ask him how I can build up the courage to date his sister, who coincidently is the reason we broke up and is why I’m no longer in love with him.”

Magnus laughed at her wording. “Damn Fairchild!”

Clary giggled, a sound that was music to Magnus all too tired ears despite the obvious strain to her voice. “I guess I should go and… see Izzy.”

“You go girl!” Magnus repeated, grateful when his words drew one more laugh from Clary.

“Thank you Magnus”, she said softly.

Magnus smiled even though she couldn’t see it. “Anytime biscuit.”

Their conversation ended soon after that and Magnus sunk into the couch with a sigh. Alec scooted a little closer towards where Magnus lay, his head back against the back of the couch and his eyes closed as he took deep breaths.

Alec quickly pecked Magnus’ lips, which startled the older man into action. He sat up hastily and looked over at Alec, who had a shit-eating grin on his face.

“So, what’s up with Clary?”

Magnus blew out a breath. “It would seem your darling sister called her, confessed her undying love for her over the phone and then proceeded to hang up.”

Alec gasped. “No freakin’ way!” he gasped before collapsing into laughter. “She did not!”

Magnus watched Alec with a raised eyebrow. Alec held his stomach as he cackled.

“You finished yet, Mr?” Magnus teased.

Alec chuckled as he quickly picked up his phone, eyes darting across the screen before he broke back out into laughter. “Izzy and Raph have called me like 30 times”, he giggled.

Magnus rolled his eyes. “Are you not worried?”

“No!” Alec snorted. “Izzy is one of the most confident people I’ve ever met, she’ll be fine. Besides, she needs to do this herself.”

“And you would know all about confessing your love to someone, wouldn’t you?” Magnus teased lightly.

Alec shot Magnus a flirtatious look, as though he were daring Magnus to question him. “Maybe”, he said playfully. “I did it pretty recently actually.”

“Oh did you now?” Magnus asked, playing along.

Alec nodded. “Oh yeah”, he said as he began to slink towards Magnus. “I told this man that I loved him. It was very dramatic.”

Magnus looked impressed. “And what did he say in return I wonder?”

Alec looked thoughtful for a moment. “Well”, he drawled. “He seemed pretty pleased.”

Magnus smirked, remembering how carried away they had grown in the moments after Alec’s confession. In that moment, Magnus recognized just how charged the air around them truly was, and perhaps how inevitable it was for such sexual tension to settle over them after so long apart.

“How pleased?”

“Very pleased”, Alec said, putting emphasis on the first word. He drew closer to Magnus, pushing back on his shoulders until he sat back, baring his empty lap to Alec. Alec straddled Magnus quickly, wrapping his hands around his neck and burying his fingers into his hair.

Magnus just about managed to contain a wanton moan at Alec’s confidence. Magnus knew that nothing more than making out would happen to night, but that didn’t stop him from admiring Alec’s confidence and sexual prowess. 

Magnus slid his hands under Alec’s shirt to explore his back.

“Did he say it back?” Magnus asked breathlessly.

Alec grinned, tightening his grip on Magnus’ hair and slowly leaning towards him until their lips were grazing one another’s. Alec remained there for a moment, humming teasingly.

“Yeah”, he whispered with bated breath. “Yeah, he did.”

Magnus groaned quietly, Alec’s breath hitting his lips and making for quite a distraction. “What was it that he said back, Alec?”

Alec bit his lip and after a moment, released it with a pop. Magnus’ eyes dropped to Alec’s lips and he couldn’t help but lick his own hungrily.

“You wanna know what he said?”

Magnus nodded frantically. “Yeah, tell me.”

Alec smirked. “He say 3 little words.”

“What were they?” Magnus asked, his voice growing more and more breathless as he became more and more overwhelmed with Alec’s seduction.

“You sure you wanna know?”

Magnus nodded slowly, breathing deeply.

Alec lent just a little bit closer until his lips rested against Magnus’. Instead of kissing him, Alec let his own tongue dart out to lick across the seam of Magnus’ lips, an action that drew a deep and guttural moan from Magnus.

“I love you”, Alec breathed against his lips, the movement of them against Magnus’ feeling all too much like a kiss.

Magnus kissed Alec with a need that burned fiercely through him, almost uncontrollable. Alec seemed pleasantly surprised by his haste as he kissed Magnus back, giving it as good as he got it. After a moment or two however, Magnus’ lips grew so frantic that Alec had to relent, giving up and allowing Magnus to have full control of the kiss.

Magnus sucked Alec’s lower lip into his mouth, laving it with his tongue.

Alec gasped, moaning unashamedly, which only appeared to encourage Magnus.

Alec pulled away after a moment, leaning back to allow Magnus to tear at the buttons of his shirt. Alec spared a thought to think about how much preparation this outfit had taken, considering Alec’s lack of style, but soon found himself uncaring. He watched with rapt interest as Magnus tore the shirt off of his shoulder, tossing it across the room with abandon.

Magnus took a second to breath, looking up at Alec who was panting harshly. The rise and fall of Alec’s chest only brought Magnus’ attention more firmly to his abs. He poked them experimentally.

“Nice”, he joked.

Alec laughed breathlessly, his panting growing more and more heavy as he watched Magnus’ eyes darken and his lips moisten. Alec grew so overwhelmed in his arousal that he was lost for words.

Magnus watched as Alec’s breaths grew more and more frantic, finding pleasure in the reaction he was managing to draw from him.

“I love you so fucking much”, Alec breathed in between pants.

Magnus looked up at Alec, his eyes radiating affection. Magnus wasn’t sure if he would ever grow accustomed to hearing Alec say such a thing, especially not in the throes of passion.

“Alec”, he mumbled. “Can I?”

Alec looked down at his bare chest, taking a moment to decide. He didn’t want to go all the way tonight and he suspected that Magnus didn’t either, but allowing Magnus to progress in their sexual relationship sounded all too appealing to turn down.

Alec nodded quickly.

“I need to hear you say it, Alec”, Magnus said softly, encouragingly.

Alec licked his lips, his eyes fluttering shut at the anticipation of what was to come. “Yes.”

Alec’s words soon melted off into a moan as Magnus immediately drew him closer, plastering his lips across Alec’s chest and abs.

Alec allowed himself the pleasure of Magnus’ lips for a few minutes before he forced Magnus to pull away. Magnus looked displeased.

“Take it off”, Alec begged, pulling at Magnus’ collar.

Magnus felt his arousal grow at Alec begging, filing his thoughts away for a later date.

As quickly as he could, Magnus stripped of his shirt with the help of Alec’s frantic hands. The second his torso was bared to Alec, Alec pulled Magnus into a deep kiss, pressing their chests together as closely as possible and moaning at the contact.

How either man managed to keep their hips still was beyond reason but Magnus found himself grateful that they had or perhaps they would not have lasted this long.

Alec eventually pulled away, lips slick and swollen. He pushed Magnus back against the couch and shuffled back slightly in his lap, biting his lip to hold back a moan when their crotches brushed. Magnus wasn’t so prepared and groaned loudly.

Alec smirked. “You alright there?”

Magnus rolled his eyes, “I’m great Alexander.”

“Just be glad Cat isn’t home tonight”, Alec teased.

Magnus laughed. “Oh she’ll kill us if she finds out how we’ve defaced the couch!”

Grinning coyly, Alec set back to work, the distance between meaning he now had more space to lean forward and draw Magnus’ nipple into his mouth.

While Magnus adored showering Alec in kisses and affection, having Alec return the favour was mind-blowing. He moaned loudly, unable to control his reaction to Alec’s eager touch.

“I love you”, Magnus said, finding himself desperate to repeat it _just once more._

Alec pulled away from Magnus’ chest to look him deeply in the eye. “I love you too”, he said simply, cradling Magnus’ face between in his hands and drawing him into a kiss.

While nothing beyond making out and heavy-petting happened, Alec did end up spending the night. Something he was sure to be teased about come morning.

  


  


  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did you enjoy reading that, because I have a feeling you did? ;)
> 
> Let me know what you thought down BELOW :D


	24. Paradise Destroyed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything seems to finally be improving for Alec and those around him. Shame it can't stay like that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm super sorry this is late guys, but some stuff has been happening at home lately that has stopped me from updating. I appreciate the patience. Follow my tumblr, because when things like this happen I do post about them just to let you gusy know. 
> 
> Okay, this chapter is one that requires a very serious warning and I ask that you read it and only continue this chapter at your own risk. If you might feel triggered by the events of this chapter I strongly urge you to not read it and simply read the disclaimer at the beginning of the next chapter where I will explain the gist of what happens. Please head this warning. 
> 
> WARNING: HOMOPHOBIC LANGUAGE. ATTEMPTED RAPE AND SEXUAL ASSAULT.

 

 

 

* * *

 

Chapter 24

The week that followed was beyond hectic for both Alec and Magnus.

First of all, Jace moved out. On the Tuesday Jace had headed to his modelling audition and had supposedly “nailed it”. While Alec had been sceptical at first, the call that he was hired had proven his doubts to be pointless. Jace had eagerly headed off to shoot a few days later and by the time his first pay check came in, Izzy had enthusiastically helped him pick out a place not too far from work but miraculously only 10 minutes from either Alec or Izzy.

Izzy, besides helping Jace find a place, hadn’t been seen a huge amount during the week. To be honest, were he not dating Magnus, Alec wouldn’t know anything about his little sister’s week. Magnus had explained that Isabelle and Clarissa were busy coming to terms with their feelings and had been spending a lot of time together to do that. While Alec was slightly worried and albeit jealous that Izzy was sharing this news with Magnus rather than him, he was soon distracted by work and his boyfriend.

Work had sadly grown worse, and by that he meant that Camille was still there. She appeared to be breezing through the job and had more than impressed the owner, Alec’s boss. Alec had kindly asked the owner, Barry, if it were possible to talk to him about his latest employee, but had been he’d have to wait. That wait meant that Camille had been left free for d _ays_ to ruin his life.

Magnus steered clear of the bar, not that he was regular anyway. The pair tended to spend their time together at either Alec or Magnus’ place, much to the chagrin of Raphael and Catarina. The only time work was spoken about was when Magnus repeated Izzy’s stories from during the day.

Magnus had also managed to evade Alec’s many attempts at discussing Camille. Part of Alec was relieved, for he didn’t want the conversation either, but he knew it had to be done. The one or two “dates” they had shared consisted of late night movies and talking, on everything besides Camille.

Besides the ever-present worry Alec felt for Magnus, things had gone pretty well for Alec over the course of a single week and he very much hoped that incline would continue.

By Sunday, Alec finally received word from Izzy, confirming she would be meeting him and Magnus over at Jace’s for the evening. Raphael and Simon had kindly declined the offer, more eager to take advantage of an empty house, and Clary had also avoided the evening. Magnus insisted that he had asked Cat and Ragnor and Alec was not surprised when Magnus relayed their refusals; Ragnor was hardly a social person and Cat was rather busy.

“Well good evening darling”, Magnus greeted as he slid into the passenger seat.

Alec grinned. “How are you?”

Magnus quickly buckled up and settled back into the chair. He slowly reached down and let his hand gently graze Alec’s thigh. Alec ignored his smirk and began to pull away from the sidewalk outside Magnus’ loft.

“I’m wonderful” , Magnus said cheerfully. “And you?”

Alec nodded. “I’m okay. So, explain this to me because I’m still confused; are they together or not?”

Magnus laughed wholeheartedly. “Oh, you know I really don’t have a clue Alexander.”

Alec chuckled, eyes darting from the road to glance at Magnus, who returned his smile fondly. Alec took a moment to appreciate the simplicity and domesticity of this moment; just driving around in a car with his boyfriend, heading over to hang out with their friends.

“So, what’s Jace cooking up this time?”

Alec scoffed. “You actually think he’s going to cook? You have far too high expectations.”

Magnus smirked and squeezed Alec’s thigh softly. “I try to see the best in a person, thank you very much.”

“I’m sure you do”, Alec teased kindly. “You’re ever so sweet Mags.”

“Like candy”, Magnus chirped, winking.

Alec laughed, shaking his head. As they began to near Jace’s apartment block, Alec felt Magnus’ hand slowly slid up his thigh, until it rested dangerously close to his crotch.

Pulling over and quickly parking, Alec removed Magnus’ hand as fast as he could. Magnus raised an eyebrow as Alec blushed.

“None of that, we’re actually going inside to see them”, Alec insisted, cheeks a deep pink as he hurriedly grabbed the bottle of vodka he had brought and leapt from the car.

Magnus slowly exited the vehicle, grinning like a maniac. “You are far too easy to mess with, baby.”

Alec rolled his eyes, but held himself back until Magnus arrived at his side. Quickly slipping his hand into Mangus’, Alec led him inside.

Magnus made a noise that sounded like an appreciative hum as his eyes swept the décor of the apartment building. “Not bad”, he commented absentmindedly.

Alec smiled softly as he directed Magnus to the elevator. When the door closed behind them, Alec pressed the number of Jace’s floor and settled back against the cool metal.

Within a few seconds, Magnus was pressed against him and wrapped Alec in his arms. Alec raised an eyebrow but allowed Magnus to pull him into a kiss.

When he pulled away, he was grinning. “What was that for?”

Magnus beamed, distancing himself from Alec slightly. “I didn’t get a ‘hello’ kiss in the car”, he explained simply.

Alec shook his head fondly, before leading Magnus to Jace’s front door.

The building that Jace was in wasn’t exactly 5 star, but it was considerably nice. Jace hadn’t been paid huge sums for his modelling thus far but the money had somehow allowed him to snag a rather nice apartment in a rather expensive area of LA. Alec would say he was surprised but Jace always had been good a charming his way into good deals.

“Why hello brother”, Izzy greeted as she flung open Jace’s front door rather gracelessly.

Alec grinned. “Hey Iz”, he said as he lent down to peck her cheek.

Izzy seemed pleased with the welcoming, waving her brother inside before quickly sharing a kiss on the cheek with Magnus. She bounced rather excitedly on her feet as she closed the door behind them before leading them through the narrow hallways towards a bright white room that resembled a dining room.

Alec whistled. “Jesus Jace, how did you afford this?”

Jace looked up from where he was at the table and beamed. “I don’t even know, dude. This place was fully furnished.”

“Not that you didn’t have a ton of furniture left a Clary’s”, Izzy said teasingly as she dropped back into her seat at the table. She nodded at two empty seats beside her.

Magnus and Alec joined the other Lightwoods at the dining table, watching as they bickered.

“Well now she can use it for her new roommate”, Jace protested.

Magnus leaned forward at that, intrigued. “She’s found one?”

Izzy nodded. “Yep, she headed over a few days ago to check the place out. New to the area.”

Alec nodded before leaning over to Magnus. “Want a drink?” he asked quietly.

Magnus smiled. “Yes please babe.”

Alec grinned as he rose to grab drinks. Having spent so much time with Magnus over the time they had known each other, he was more than familiar with the process of making Magnus a drink. Knowing Magnus, he would want to start the evening off with something simple and so Alec poured him a straightforward orange juice and vodka.

When he handed it over, Magnus smiled. “Thanks”, he said, taking an eager sip and moaning at the flavour.

Alec couldn’t control the proud grin on his face as he re-joined the others at the table. “Speaking of Clary, how come she didn’t come over?”

Jace quickly swallowed the chunk of whatever the hell he was eating. “She’s heading over in a bit, I think.”

Alec looked confused. “I thought you said she wasn’t coming”, he said, directing the question at Izzy.

Izzy shrugged, smile on her face. “I convinced her to”, she said simply. “She was a little panicked about seeing Jace again but they saw each other a few days ago when he picked up his thinks and everything was fine. She doesn’t want to stop seeing him so she agreed, as long as Magnus was there.”

Magnus looked startled, but grinned wildly. “Me?”

Izzy giggled. “Yes, you. You’re brilliant at making conversation.”

“That he is”, Alec smirked. “So, what’s going on with you and Clary then, Iz?”

Izzy looked surprisingly content as she settled back in her chair with a sigh. “Well”, she began, her face twisted into a smile. “I made the ridiculous mistake of calling her last week and telling her I was in love with her-”

“Considering you’re smiling I assume that she was okay with that?”

Izzy chuckled but nodded. “I headed over to hers the next day to explain myself. Anyway, we got talking and agreed that we wanted to be together but that the last thing we wanted to do was to dive headfirst into this, put Jace through the awkwardness of it all, and then break up. So we’re taking it slow but we have spent a lot of time together.”

“So are you dating?”

Izzy shook her head at Magnus. “Not officially but we’re planning a date for next week. This week we’ve just been talking, explaining the situation and everything.”

Alec nodded. “Happy for you, Iz”, he said, smiling.

Izzy smirked. “Why thank you brother.”

Alec turned to Jace, who was smiling slightly as he took a chug of what looked like beer. “So how are you with everything? Did you do what I asked you to?”

Jace rolled his eyes. “Yes, Alec. When I got my things, Izzy was there. We all sat and talked for a bit and I told them that I was completely fine with them being together.” Jace looked over at Izzy, “And I wasn’t lying”, he promised.

Izzy smiled gratefully. “Thank you again”, she smiled.

Jace winked exaggeratedly. “Anything to make you smile, little sis.”

Magnus grinned as he watched the exchange and felt his smile grow even more when he saw the relief and happiness so clear on Alec’s face. He knew, despite Alec not saying anything, that the eldest Lightwood had been greatly concerned when Clary, Jace and Izzy’s drama began all those months ago. To say that Alec was protective of his siblings and their happiness was an understatement, and the idea that they might lose each other in the pursuit of it had scared him. Magnus had no doubt that seeing this, and knowing everything was okay, had taken a great weight off of Alexander’s shoulders.

The night drifted by rather quickly and soon enough, Clary joined them. She greeted everyone, including Jace with a short lived hug before settling on the couch. They had all moved into Jace’s main room hours ago and were sharing animated discussions about different movies, which Clary eagerly joined.

Alec couldn’t help but wink playfully at Clary when he saw her sit rather closely beside Izzy, their arms grazing.

Clary rolled her eyes and nodding towards Magnus, who was settled back against the couch, arm over Alec’s shoulders. “You’re becoming him”, Clary mouthed.

Alec laughed; unfazed by the looks of confusion he received from those around him. “I am, aren’t I?”

Clary nodded, giggling. “Yes you are!”

The pair continued to ignore their friends when they voiced their confusion and eventually the others moved on, brushing off their behaviour as yet another sign of their insanity. What the other signs were, Alec wasn’t sure.

“He’s not a good character”, Clary shouted in protest. “He murders people!”

“Yeah but he’s badass”, Jace argued, grinning.

Magnus smirked. “And hot”, he added.

Izzy rolled her eyes but was distracted by the sight of Alec reaching beside him to give Magnus a small high five. Izzy somehow managed to contain her smile and her look of shock. Jace and Clary didn’t seem to notice but Izzy allowed herself a moment to feel pride for her brother, who was sitting with his friends and his _boyfriend,_ openly laughing and joking about hot men. It was crazy to think that their mother had tried to tear at his confidence just last weekend. She was excited to say Alec appeared to have come out of the encounter stronger than ever before.

“That doesn’t justify murder”, Clary laughed.

Magnus shrugged slightly. Alec shook his head at Clary, eyes soft with amusement but face straight as ever. “Hotness trumps moral integrity.”

Clary burst into laughter, closely followed by Izzy.

“No it does not! You guys have your priorities skewed!”

Alec choked slightly. “Us gays?” he cried.

Clary looked baffled. “No!” she screeched, laughing so hard she had to hold her stomach. “You _guys!”_

Alec chuckled. “I was going to say! Magnus isn’t straight.”

Izzy didn’t ignore the look of relief and happiness of Alec’s face when everyone laughed, including Jace. It seemed that this was the sort of validation her brother wanted and to see him receive it made Izzy beam.

“Since Sephora isn’t here to say it, I will” Magnus grinned. “Jace is once again the only straight guy in the room.”

Jace rolled his eyes. “I’m heterosexual and I fucking love it.”

Magnus grinned, giving Jace a thumbs up. “That’s the spirit!” he cried cheerfully. “Equality!”

Alec laughed, gently patting Magnus’ shoulder to calm him down. “Are you drunk?” he chuckled.

Magnus snorted. “Oh Alexander, it takes a lot more than a bottle of vodka to get me drunk!”

“Seriously?” Clary asked.

Magnus nodded, a somewhat proud smile on his face. “You’re lucky if two does the trick”, he insisted, head held high.

“He’s such a show off”, Alec mumbled fondly.

Magnus looked over at Alec and grinned. “I have reason to be. For example, there’s this rather brilliant thing I can do with my tongue that I’m sure you’d-”

“No!” Jace screeched. “I don’t want to hear about Alec’s sex life!”

Alec glared, but there was little heat behind it. “And you think I ever wanted to know about yours?!”

“I didn’t know you were gay at the time!”

“Even if I was straight I wouldn’t want to know that!”

 

…

 

 

“One ‘Sex on the Beach’!.”

Alec nodded, head hung in an attempt to avoid looking at her. As he prepared the drink, Alec attempted to ignore Camille’s presence, gritting his teeth to stop from saying too much.

It had been this way for weeks now; while Camille was good at her job she didn’t quite understand that the bar was not like a diner and she didn’t have to call out orders like Alec was her lapdog. Despite the fact that she was very efficient at getting orders, perhaps due to her ever present cleavage, she was rather impatient when it came to waiting for Alec to prepare drinks.

When he finished the drink, Alec handed it off to Camille, meeting her eye for the first time when their hands grazed. Camille took a moment or two too long to accept the drink, eyes locked on Alec’s and grin firmly in place.

“You seem to like taking orders, Alec”, she said, her voice deep and sultry.

Alec managed to contain a shudder at her words and how her eyes cast themselves appreciatively across his face. He knew she was doing it purely to get a reaction out of him and he refused to give her one.

“You’re welcome, Camille”, he said simply, pulling his hand away to return to other customers.

Raphael turned from where he was talking to a regular, Jeramiah if Alec remembered correctly, and smiled rather tightly at him. “You okay?”

Alec shrugged. “It’s getting harder and harder by the day to not kill her but apart from that, I’m good.”

Jeramiah chuckled. “Raphael was just explaining that you don’t like the new chick; she is hot though.”

“I wouldn’t know”, Alec and Raphael said simultaneously. Jeramiah gaped and both boys looked at each other in surprise.

“No way”, Jeramiah snorted. “That was too awesome!”

Alec chuckled. “That was pretty cool”, he laughed, patting Raphael on the shoulder before heading away. “We’re out of Schnapps! Back in a sec!”

Raphael waved him off as he headed towards the back room.

The back room, located behind the bar, was full to the brim of alcohol. Having used the last of the peach schnapps in the Sex On The Beach, Alec began to search the room for a bottle or two to replace what was missing.

Having worked at the bar for several years, Alec was rather familiar with the back room and found what he was looking for in no time. Snatching up a bottle or two, Alec turned to head back to the bar.

Only to be stopped by a slim body blocking his path. Alec gasped, stumbling backwards slightly.

“Are you okay?” Camille asked, voice overly sweet.

Alec furrowed his eyebrows and gaped at her slightly. Ignoring the heavy feeling that settled into his stomach, Alec attempted to remain calm. “What are you doing back here Camille?”

“I saw you come back here and got a little… worried.”

Alec raised an eyebrow. “Worried?”

Camille nodded, hand held to her chest in a poor attempt to seem scared. “You looked a little lonely so I thought I would come and… join you, y’know?”

“I’m fine Camille. I was just getting some more Schnapps”, he said, raising the bottle to show her.

Camille looked thoughtful and eventually she nodded. Alec watched as she took a sleek step forward, immediately copying her and taking a small step back. Camille looked both annoyed and amused by his actions. Her smile grew.

“Are you sure you don’t need help?”

Alec felt his chest constrict slightly. “I can carry two bottles by myself Camille.”

Camille looked amused as she raised her hand to her mouth to giggle loudly. “No”, she said cheerfully. “Not with _that_ , silly!”

“With what then?” Alec demanded, voice growing more and more tense as Camille took another step closer. Alec took one more step back, only to bump into the shelf he had removed the Schnapps from.

Camille tilted her head to watch him for a moment, and Alec was reminded of how animals looked at their prey. Her eyes were almost calculating, as though she were judging and inspecting him to see how he might react.

The silence only made Alec more nervous. “Help with what Camille?” he repeated, voice shaking slightly.

Camille smiled. “With you, of course.”

“With _me_?” Alec said, face deadpan.

Camille nodded frantically. “Oh yes. You see Alec, I feel that it is… perhaps even my d _uty_ to help you understand what you really are.”

Alec felt his blood boiling slightly, reminded of how Camille had wanted to “help” Magnus. Feeling fiercely protective, Alec glared. “And what’s that?” he said, clearly daring her to say what he knew she would say.

“Confused”, she said softly.

Alec scoffed. “I’m not confused, Camille. You are.”

Camille giggled. “I’m not confused; I understand that this may come as a surprise to you Alec but you a _re_ confused. Worse than that, you’re s _ick.”_

Alec grit his teeth. “Get the fuck away from me Camille”, Alec growled as he watched Camille slink closer, having nowhere to go due to the shelf behind him.

Camille stopped directly in front of him and raised a finger to graze along Alec’s jawbone. Alec immediately flinched away, hissing threateningly.

Camille seemed amused at his attempt to move away. Stepping so that her legs were on either side of his, effectively trapping him were he not to use force, Camille grinned.

“Let me fix you, Alec. Or should I say… Alexander.”

Alec tensed.

She knew.

She knew about him and Magnus.

Alec was startled from his thoughts by the rather noticeable feeling of Camille’s claw-like hands cupping his crotch. Alec immediately dropped the bottles in his hands with a gasp.

Camille grinned. “I knew you liked taking orders”, she said proudly.

Alec froze. In that moment, despite the desperate urge to remove her hand, Alec felt his entire body shut down. Images flooded his mind of a night he had never witnessed, but one he had witnessed the aftermath to. Imagining Magnus trapped like this, powerless at the hands of his lover, forced to fight his way out of her arms, made Alec feel similarly powerless.

Camille squeezed, which brought Alec back to awareness and made him yelp. Her spare hand wrapped around Alec’s shoulder, pushing him against the metal frame of the shelf behind him.

Alec panted, terrified, as he watched Camille’s face twist into a look of satisfaction. Her long fingers trailed up his collarbone to wrap around his neck. The slight squeeze made Alec gasp.

“Get off of me”, Alec growled.

Camille smirked. “I thought I was the one giving orders here baby.”

Alec winced, the familiar word piercing into his heart as he was once again reminded of Magnus.

“I swear to God Camille, I’m not afraid to hit you”, he warned.

Camille laughed quietly. “I wouldn’t try that if I were you baby. After all, I’m your only hope.”

Alec raised his hands to remove hers from around his neck but was immediately stopped by the searing pain of Camille digging her long, false nails into his neck. Alec gasped, sagging slightly at the undeniable sensation of his skin being torn open. He couldn’t feel any blood but he suspected she had undeniably pierced his skin.

Camille grinned at his reaction but didn’t release her grip on his neck.

Alec quickly began to claw at her hands, succeeding in removing the one from his crotch. Before he even had a chance at removing her hand from around his neck, he felt her nails sink deeper into his skin. The vice like grip she had on his neck made him rigid, caught for breath.

Alec choked on the lack of air he was receiving, the pain spreading through his neck and causing him to pant. The lack of oxygen made him vaguely lightheaded and he desperately fought against the dizzy feeling in his head.

“S-Stop”, he gasped, digging his own, far less blunt, nails into her hand.

Camille growled, raising her other hand to slap him around the face. Alec winced but not from the pain in his cheek, but rather how the move had caused her nails to sink just a little deeper into his neck.

Alec panicked when he felt Camille’s hands at his belt buckle, the sound of it being pulled undone echoing around the back room. In an attempt to get away, Alec struggled, slapping and clawing at whatever part of Camille he could. He attempted vigorously to reach her neck, to perhaps give her the same treatment, but Camille simply used her grip on him to push him further against the shelf. The undeniable feeling of blood sliding down his neck made Alec tense.

“Stop, you psy- psychotic b-bitch”, he spat, wrapping his hands around her wrist and pulling at hard as he could in attempt to dislodge her grip on his neck.

Camille fought back while busily undoing his jeans. Alec felt his heart hammer in his chest and struggled as hard as he could, ignoring the pain in his neck.

Camille’s grip loosened slightly but before Alec could even attempt to use it to his advantage, Camille wrapped her hand around him. Alec closed his eyes, trying desperately to withhold tears.

He quickly pulled, trying desperately to get away from her. At this point, Alec could hardly see around the tears fogging his vision.

Camille giggled slightly and tightened her grip. Alec gasped in pain, his legs buckling.

“Let me fix you”, Camille said softly, her voice sickeningly sweet and mocking.

“Stop!” he cried as loudly as he could. “Ge-get off me!”

Through the fog of tears, Alec could vaguely see the door of the back room open and almost sagged in relief. When he heard his unknown rescuer cry out in surprise, he used the last drops of strength he had to push against Camille.

Camille, distracted by the arrival of a third party, was easily pushed away.

Alec immediately collapsed to the floor and rolled into a protective ball. He couldn’t help but cry out, the pain in his neck and crotch too much to bear. Groaning and attempting to wipe at his tears, Alec raised his head and saw Sasha.

Sound appeared to escape him as he watched the heated exchange. Sasha appeared to be screaming, slapping and hitting Camille as best as she could. Camille gave it as good as she got it but appeared to be almost tired.

 Only a second or two passed before someone entered, this time it was Barry. Barry looked around, taking in the scene around him, his eyes lingering on Alec, before breaking the pair up. Sasha screamed something which caught Barry’s attention and he wasted not a second before grabbing Camille and throwing her against the way.

Camille gasped, her face pressed against the concrete as Barry shouted something at Sasha, who immediately pulled out a phone.

“Alec!”

 

…

 

Raphael heard the commotion, heard screams. He quickly abandoned his post, waving off an angry customer who protested. He turned to look down the hall to see Barry hurry into the back room and without a second thought, immediately began to follow.  

Before he reached the door however, Raphael heard something that made him freeze.

“She tried to rape Alec!”

The gasps of the bar patrons perfectly echoed Raphael’s own shock. He froze in place for a moment, an all too familiar feeling of anger, fear and heartbreak overwhelming him. He quickly tore off towards the back room.

When he arrived, despite the anger burning through him, he ignored Camille entirely. He headed straight towards Alec, who was curled in a ball on the floor, his jeans unbuckled and hanging open and his hand squeezing his neck as he gasped.

“Alec!”

Alec moaned pathetically as Raphael fell to his knees at his side. Raphael immediately began to inspect him, pulling Alec’s hand away from his neck despite his protests.

“Shit Alec”, Raphael sighed as he took in the damage. Alec’s neck was torn, and 4 deep crevices were carved into the skin, each oozing blood.

“Raph, that hurts!” Alec protested, batting away his hands.

Raphael frowned. “I know”, he insisted. He took Alec’s hand, raising it back to his neck and encouraging him to hold his hand to the wounds carefully. “Are you okay?”

Alec laughed humourlessly. “Do I look okay?”

Raphael sighed, his chest constricting as he took in Alec’s feeble position. Noticing his unbuttoned jeans once more, he reached down to do them back up, only to be startled away by a cry from Alec.

“What?”

Alec groaned deeply. “She- She… it hurts.”

Raphael furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, unsure what Alec could possibly mean. Then, he looked once more at Alec’s open pants and it dawned on him. Hissing, Raphael ignored Alec’s pleas and carefully did up his pants.

“I’m gonna kill her”, he growled, pulling Alec into his arms.

Alec groaned in pain but settled against Raphael gratefully. “Me too”, he said.

Raphael frowned. “Stop joking about this!”

Raphael heard the all too familiar sound of Alec crying quietly against his chest. “What else would you have me do?” Alec whispered, his voice accurately showing the same hopelessness that Raphael felt.

Raphael vaguely heard the sound of approaching sirens and Sasha call out his name but he ignored it all. He simply tightened his grip on Alec, wrapping him in his arms protectively, and whispered false promises in his ears.

“It’s gonna be okay, Alec.”

Alec sniffled. “I need Magnus.”

“I know, I know”, Raphael said softly, eyes wet with unshed tears. “He’ll be here. It’s okay. It’s all gonna be okay.”

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just as an aside, I do NOT take this act lightly and should you feel triggered by this chapter or should you have experienced something similar, I strongly urge you speak to someone; a friend, parent or helpline. 
> 
> I hope that you enjoyed this chapter despite the themes. Let me know your opinions and what you want to see happen next, either to Camille or between Alec and Magnus.


	25. Time Repeats Itself

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone is informed of Alec's injuries, which are much graver than anticipated. In the meantime, Magnus and Raphael are reminded of a time, 7 years ago, when Magnus was the victim of the same crime.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all wanted to see Magnus' reaction so here you have it! ;)
> 
> ENJOY.
> 
>  
> 
> WARNING: explicit language.

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

Chapter 26

 _7:14pm_  
  


“Do your thing after the beep.”

_Beep._

“Magnus… you have to get to the hospital now. It’s Alec. He’s-he’s… we’re in ER and… and he’s…. I don’t know. They said something about blood and… I don’t know what they’re doing but he was rushed to some room. I can’t see him. Magnus, it’s…. it’s Camille. She-she tried to rape him and I don’t know, she must have done something but… You have to get here Magnus, please hurry!”

 

…

_7:20pm_  
  


“Izzy?”

“Hey Raph, what’s up?”

“Izzy… it’s Alec. We’re at the hospital and he’s in ER…. Camille attacked him.”

“Wait, what?”

“Yeah, she tried to…. She tried to rape him, Izzy. He’s… he passed out and I don’t know what happening. I-I think it’s shock but I don’t-”

“-Oh shit… Okay… Me and Clary are on our way!”

 

…

 

 _7:24pm_  
  


“Jace? It’s Raphae-”

“Clary text me. I’m on my way.”

_Beep._

_…_

 

 _7:31pm_  
  


“Where is she?! Where is she, I’m gonna kill her!”

Raphael turned from the police officer he was speaking to, who looked rather unimpressed by the intrusion. Raphael spun to face the double doors leading to the emergency room. Storming through them, as vibrant and angry as Raphael had expected, was Magnus.

Ignoring the looks or surprise and disgust from the various other people waiting in the waiting room of the ER, Magnus stormed forward, shouting.

“Where the fuck is she? I’m gonna kill that bitch!” Magnus screamed by way of greeting as he approached. His face was bare of any makeup and his eyes were red-rimmed and tired; Raphael had no doubt that the sniffling he heard over the phone was Magnus’ tears for Alec.

Raphael waved the police officer away and, grabbing Magnus’ arm, dragged him to other end of the hall. “First of all, glad to see you got my message. Second of all… stop threatening to kill people in front of the freakin’ cops! You need to calm down”, he insisted.

Magnus looked enraged. “Calm down? That bitch I call an ex, who, coincidentally tried to rape me, has just sexually assaulted my boyfriend! Don’t tell me to calm down until you’ve gone through the same fucking thing!”

Raphael grit his teeth, forcing himself to remain calm. He made a point of ignoring the looks they were receiving, most of them shock.

“You think I don’t wanna kill that bitch too?” he hissed. “I do, trust me. But currently, my best friend is some room with a doctor who just had to stitch his neck up!”

“Stitches?”

“Yes”, Raphael sighed. “Camille’s nails.”

Magnus gaped. Taking a deep breath, he nodded slowly, all too familiar with Camille’s sharp gel nails and just how she could use them. Magnus forced himself to take a deep breath and turned his mind to Alexander rather than… her.

“How is he?”

Raphael took a deep breath and his shoulders sagged. His eyes became heavy once more and his face twisted with sadness. “I don’t know. After we found him I just…. held him. The ambulance arrived pretty quickly and the cops took h-her and the paramedics just grabbed him and started doing stuff to his neck and… I remember him passing out but, I don’t know what happened after that. I’m a little blank”, he said, his voice growing shaky. “Before he… passed out… he wanted you.”

Magnus winced, closing his eyes as though it would protect him from the guilt that rained over him. He felt all of the earlier energy he had drain from him, and his entire body drooped with the weight of reality. Magnus bit his lip to control his crying; the only person that was allowed to cry right now was Alec.

When he looked up to face Raphael, he was shocked to see tears streaking his cheeks. Only once before had Magnus seen Raphael cry, and that was when he had found out about Camille’s first offence. Magnus blocked the memories as hastily as he could, refusing to allow himself the time to contemplate them. Now, it was about Alec.

“You gotta be there for him”, Raphael cried softly.

Magnus watched as Raphael began to wipe angrily at the liquid around his eyes, pulling his hand back to inspect the tears with a sort of disgust.

Magnus nodded slowly. “I know, I plan to be. I-I could never leave him to deal with this alone.”

“Good”, Raphael said simply, voice hoarse. “He really, really needs you now. Not me, or Izzy or Jace. You.”

“I know”, Magnus said passionately. “I’ve been through this exact situation, I’m the best to talk to about this.”

Raphael shook his head sharply. “No”, he protested. “That helps but that’s not why. He just needs _you.”_

Magnus watched Raphael for a moment in silence and Raphael did the same in return. For a moment, Magnus had the passing thought that he wanted to be there for Raphael, wipe away his tears like a real big brother, but he brushed them aside, knowing that Raphael would only grow annoyed if Magnus paid any less than 100% of his attention to Alec.

Thinking back to Alec, Magnus’ heart ached. Thinking of the past week that they had shared, romantic moments and cherished memories. Magnus didn’t doubt that Camille’s actions today would not only taint all memories of this week, but that she would also damn many others.

Magnus wondered whether or not Alec would even want to see him. Sure, Raphael had claimed as much but for all he knew Alec had changed his mind. Whether Alec could handle seeing him, handle touching him, was a completely different story. Alec would perhaps even need to end their relationship.

When they were going to finally get a break, Magnus didn’t know.

“Are you with Alexander?” A doctor asked as he approached.

Magnus and Raphael immediately nodded, to which the doctor smiled, slightly strained, and led them down a hall.

“He’s dozed off from the medication”, the doctor explained as he led them to where, presumably, Alec was. “He’s been stitched up, we were just cleaning him up a little. Are either of you family?” he asked, nodding to Magnus and Raphael.

Magnus immediately responded. “Yes”, he insisted. “Raphael here is his brother. Adoptive.”

Fortunately, the doctor didn’t ask any further questions and simply nodded. “Okay”, he began, coming to a stop outside of a small, closed door. “Well, we’ve stitched up the cuts on his neck, which were pretty deep. We’ve put him on blood due to how much he lost from the damage to his neck. Also, he has some penile bruising but that should become easier to deal with in a few days. For now however, he is on painkillers. We’ll need to keep him overnight as we need to ensure his neck heals properly.”

Magnus remained motionless as he took in everything the doctor had said.

_Stitches?_

_Penile bruising?_

_Blood loss?_

Raphael appeared to voice similar confusion. “Wait, he needs to be on blood? But… I didn’t think they bled that much?”

The doctor nodded solemnly. “Whatever it was that pierced his skin, nicked his exterior jugular and caused quite a bit of blood loss. I hate to tell you son but, your shirt is drenched. If the ambulance hadn’t arrived when it did… let’s just say we’d be having a much different conversation.”

Magnus took a deep, unsteady breath. “I thought if… if you cut the jugular, you, er, you… d-died?”

The doctor nodded once more. “You do”, he confirmed. “Alec was exceptionally lucky and the cut was incredibly small and was in the smaller, exterior jugular. Any bigger and he would have bled out a hell of a lot faster and probably wouldn’t have made it here alive.”

Raphael watched as Magnus’ chest began to rise at an increased pace. Magnus looked off to the floor, his eyes empty and unresponsive as he daydreamed. Raphael quickly shook him out of it.

Magnus looked up at the doctor as his eyes became wet. “Thank you”, he said breathlessly and he gripped the doctor’s hand to shake it. The doctor nodded, a small sympathetic smile on his face. “Thank you so much”, Magnus repeated.

 “He’s inside. He’s asleep but he’s alive.”

Raphael took the doctor’s hand and shook it firmly. “We appreciate it.”

The doctor nodded, “I’ll be back to see him soon”, he confirmed before headed away.

Magnus looked lost.

“You okay?”

Magnus looked up at Raphael before his eyes darted down to his shirt. “He’s right. Your shirt…… it’s wet.”

Raphael looked down in panic and sure enough his shirt was covered in blood. The black did a good job hiding the damage and it was mostly dried, leaving the material slight crisp and hard. Raphael looked at it as though it were alive.

Magnus quickly stepped forward. “Come here”, he said softly and began to remove the shirt from Raphael’s body.

Raphael let him, remaining silent as the item of clothing was removed. When he looked back at Magnus he saw a look of horror and disgust. “What?”

Magnus nodded to Raphael’s chest which, much to his distress, was also stained red. Raphael blanched slightly.

“When I held him”, he stuttered. “It was just a little stream. I-I didn’t think it was- I didn’t see how much. I just held him and- and I didn’t see- He passed out but I thought- I thought it was s-shock.”

Magnus watched Raphael break down, catching his brother in his arms and holding him as close as possible, ignoring the blood that would no doubt stain his own silver shirt. Raphael cried on Magnus’ chest.

“Y-you should go”, Raphael eventually said. “I’ll wait here for Jace and Izzy… and Clary.”

Magnus nodded slowly and headed inside.

 

 

…

 

_8:34pm_

“You have to talk to me about this”, Magnus begged, tightening his grip on Alec’s hand slightly.

They were in the Emergency Room. Alec was lying on a hospital bed, eyes hollow and droopy and skin grey. He had just finished receiving stitches in his neck just over an hour ago and while the blood was slowly bringing colour back to his cheeks, he was still tired and limp.

Just as Magnus had expected, Alec was refusing to speak. Besides a grateful smile when he spotted Magnus after waking up, he had barely responded to anything.

 “Alec, you have to understand. I have been through the exact same thing with the exact same person and I know from experience that you have to talk about it. You can’t keep it bottled up, baby.”

“Don’t call me that.”

Magnus looked up at Alec, startled by the sudden raspy and almost silent sound of his voice. The damage to his throat had obviously left Alec almost entirely unable to speak.

Alec kept his eyes locked firmly on their joined hands, refusing to meet Magnus’ eye.

“What?”

Alec took a deep, shaky breath. “D-don’t call me…that. Please.”

Magnus frowned slightly, shuffling closer in his chair. He gently stroked a piece of hair away from Alec’s face, urging him to look him in the eye.  “Why not?”

Alec bit his lip, eyes darting back and forth across the bed sheet. “Camille”, he said simply, obviously too tired to talk.

Magnus’ lip trembled as he took in what Alec had said. Just yet another thing Camille had destroyed for them.

Alec looked up when he heard Magnus let out a broken sob. He watched as Magnus dropped his head into his hands, his body shaking as his sobs racked his body. Feeling powerless, Alec sat and watched, unsure what to do.

Alec felt his own eyes water at the sight and quickly let his hand rest against Magnus’ back, rubbing in gentle circles. “I’m okay, Magnus”, Alec croaked, because it didn’t feel right to say anything else.

Magnus shook his head. “I’m so sorry. If you didn’t know me she never would have done this!” he cried.

Alec shook his head frantically, crying quietly. “No. No, this is _not_ your fault. Just like it isn’t m-mine.”

Magnus looked up and smiled weakly. “Thank God you think that.”

“Think what?”

“That it’s not your fault”, Magnus clarified.

Alec looked confused and shrugged; face still contorted into a frown. “Well, it’s not.”

Magnus nodded slowly, wincing slightly at the downright painful sound of Alec choking out words. “I know it’s not.”

Alec felt his throat tighten at the feeling of holding back his sobs. He felt his eyes water, tears cascading down his cheeks and caressing his skin in a way that made him feel weirdly dirty. Alec looked at Magnus with eyes that spoke of his heartbreak and immediately Magnus rose, wrapping his arms around Alec.

Alec allowed himself to cry like he had never cried before; not when his parents disowned him, not when he was called “fag” for the first time, not when he and Magnus broke up.

Magnus held him, relishing in the cries of his boyfriend for he knew that with each tear, a little of the weight was lifted from Alec’s shoulders. Holding him in his arms and crying with him involuntarily, Magnus allowed himself for just a moment to wish that everything would be alright.

“It’s gonna be alright, Alec. We’ll get through this.”

Alec sniffled against his cried, wincing against the pain that crying caused the stitches in his neck. Even with the medication, the pain was almost unbearable.

“Okay”, he croaked quietly.

Magnus felt his heart break a little at the feeble sound of Alec’s voice and just how trusting he sounded, as though he trusted that Magnus could fix everything. Nodding, he climbed onto the bed beside Alec and let him sink into his arms.

Magnus thought out how grateful he was that Alec was not shying away from physical contact and was instead using it as an escape. It reminded him rather well of how he had done the complete opposite.

 

…

_7 years ago._

_“Magnus! Just talk to me!” Raphael cried as he chased after his adoptive brother._

_Magnus ignored him, hanging his head just a little lower to hide the tear tracks etched into his face. He blocked out the panicked voice of his younger companion and quickly darted into his room, slamming the door and locking it behind him. He spared not a single thought for the worried cries of a 17 year-old Raphael on the other side of the door, instead collapsing into his desk chair with bated breath._

_Magnus avoided even looking at his bed that night. He stayed silent until Raphael’s voice faded away and soon enough the silence around him was instead occupied with his own cries. He cried deeply and uncontrollably for hours._

_The worried voice of Raphael came and went and eventually stayed absent but not once did Magnus’ cries cease._

_That night Magnus cried until he slept. And he slept in his chair._

…

 

_8:37pm_

“How is he?”

Raphael looked at Izzy as she approached, Jace and Clary at her tail. After arriving around 40 minutes ago, they had headed straight to a doctor to question them. Clearly Izzy had received the full story and had returned to Alec’s bedside with newfound panic.

“He’s okay. Magnus is with him.”

Izzy nodded slowly, eyes darting across the white walls of the hospital and her breathing increasing until she was panting. Clary darted towards her to rest a hand on her back, quietly urging her to calm down.

Jace stepped forward, wrapping Izzy in his arms carefully and looking to Raphael, to finally be the big brother he always said he was. Izzy sunk into his arms, her tears staining his shirt and tainting the silence in the hospital hallway.

“What exactly happened?” Jace asked, voice tight with what was obviously him attempting to hold back his own tears.

Raphael winced at the sound of collective gasping as he retold the story. By the end, three people were crying, their tears drowning Raphael in sadness and their cries deafening him to reality.

 

...

 

 

_7 years ago_

_“Just tell me what’s wrong? Why are you saying all of this?”_

_Raphael winced at the sound of the sheer sadness in Will’s voice. From where he was hidden, Raphael could see the way in which Will’s face crumpled with defeat and heartbreak at Magnus’ words._

_“I don’t love you”, Magnus repeated. “Sure, you were a great lay but that’s it. Sorry.”_

_Raphael grit his teeth, rage filling him at the obvious lies falling from Magnus’ tongue. Never had Raphael been ashamed to call Magnus his brother, but seeing the look on Will’s face made Raphael so distraught that he, for a moment, wondered who Magnus really was anymore._

_“This is some sort of joke!” Will cried, voice light and breathless._

_Magnus looked down at his feet, shuffling nervously. Raphael spared a thought for how unfamiliar that move was and how un-Magnus it felt._

_“This isn’t a joke Will. I realised how deep you were falling for me and I felt bad. That’s all.”_

_Will shook his head desperately and Raphael didn’t doubt that the brunet would fight this every step of the way._

_“No way. This isn’t you”, Will pleaded. Raphael watched as Will gripped Magnus’ shoulders tightly, meeting his eyes and desperately trying to read them once more. “Please Magnus. I-I love you.”_

_Raphael had to look away, the look in Will’s eyes too intimate for him to see. He vaguely heard footsteps and assumed Magnus had taken a step away._

_“Please leave, William.”_

_Raphael heard a small sob escape Will at the impersonal name and hung his head as he heard the steady pattering of footsteps as Will retreated._

_“I loved you. Just remember that.”_

_With that, the sound of the door opening and closing resonated loudly throughout the hall and Raphael took a deep shuddering breath. It’s not that Raphael himself would miss Will, but he would certainly miss the happiness Will brought Magnus._

_Raphael was torn from his daydreaming by the heavy sounds of Magnus’ stomping up the stairs._

_“Next time, don’t eavesdrop.”_

….

 

 _8:43pm_  
  


“Do you wanna talk about it?”

Alec sighed deeply, gritting his teeth when it hurt. He met his sister’s eye and smiled as encouragingly as he could. “No”, he insisted.

Izzy sighed in defeat but nodded; the last thing she wanted to do was hurt Alec and force him to do something he didn’t want to do- after all, that was why he was here in the first place. That, and the shaky sound of Alec trying to talk only reminded her of what had happened.

“Just promise me that if you decide you want to talk, you will.”

Alec looked vaguely exasperated. Deciding that ‘s _crew the pain’_ , Alec spoke.

“Izzy, what is there to…  talk about? Magnus’ psychotic ex tried to rape me in some sick attempt to hurt him. She hurt me but she didn’t succeed in doing what she planned to do. That’s the end of it.”

Izzy winced as she heard her brother so violently say “rape”. Perhaps him saying the word was a good sign, perhaps it meant nothing, but hearing him say it in regards to his own encounter made her heart break and her blood race.

“I don’t care if it’s to me or Magnus, just… don’t bottle this up.”

Alec could feel himself growing annoyed and desperately wished that Magnus, Clary and Jace hadn’t headed to the cafeteria and left him alone with Izzy, but Jace had insisted he have some water to sooth the breaking of his throat.

The look in Izzy’s eyes was one of heartbreak and perhaps even pity. Her arms were wrapped protectively around herself, almost as though she was holding herself back to wrapping said arms around him. Her lip was shaking, her sadness no doubt trapped behind closed lips. 

For a moment, Alec was reminded of how he felt when Magnus revealed to him what he had gone through and realised that Izzy was no doubt feeling a similar sense of hopelessness, sadness and sympathy.

Alec met her eyes and smiled as fondly and as softly as he could. “I won’t”, he promised. “I’ll talk when I’m ready”

Izzy nodded reluctantly. “I love you Alec.”

“I love you too, Iz.”

 

…

 

 

 _10:42pm_  
  


“No way! I’m staying”, Izzy insisted, dragging her chair closer to Alec’s bedside.

Magnus watched her and scoffed. “Well I’m not either”, he vowed, walking to the other side of Alec’s bed.

Jace frowned slightly, eyes glued to Alec who looked uncomfortable and no doubt in pain. “You okay with them both staying?”

Alec looked up, as though he had forgotten they were even there. He nodded slowly but doing so caused pain to flare up in his neck. Gasping, he slapped his hand to the stitches. Everyone in the room leant forward in panic but Alec waved them off.

“If the d-doctors are cool with it… I don’t care.”

 

 

….

 

 _2:18pm_  
  


“She warned me y’know.”

Izzy looked up from Alec and raised an eyebrow at Magnus, who sat across from her on Alec’s other side. Alec was currently sleeping and the pair had sat in comfortable silence for hours, watching the rise and fall of Alec’s chest to ensure he was alive.

“What are you talking about?” Izzy asked softly.

Magnus stared down at the rough sheets of Alec’s hospital bed. “She warned me. Camille.”

Izzy frowned slightly. “Warned you about what? Climate change?”

Magnus didn’t laugh, nor did he crack a smile. Continuing to stare at the bedsheet, he sounded weak and tired. “She threatened to do to Alec what she did to me. She- she told me she would do it but I didn’t think she would. I thought it was an empty threat to piss me off. For the whole week she was a bitch but she never hurt him… I never would have thought-”

“-Don’t dwell on it”, Izzy insisted. “It’s not your fault. You didn’t know if and when she would decide to hurt him. It’s _not_ your fault.”

 

 _7 years ago_  
  


_“It’s his own fault really. Don’t get mixed up with Camille Belcourt.”_

_Magnus hid his face further in his locker, blocking out the sounds of gossiping teens. How the story had gotten around the school, Magnus didn’t know but now the entire student body was aware that Camille had “attacked” Magnus for being with Will. The entire school had grown more and more invested in the drama after the news broke of Will and Magnus’ split._

_The general consensus was that Magnus was at fault for leaving Camille. While no one knew the extent of her “attack”, most people agreed that it was either his fault for being with her in the first place, his fault for leaving her, or his fault for being bi._

_“You really can’t blame Will for breaking up with him. Anyone would.”_

_Magnus closed his eyes, praying that their voices might fade away with his sight. They didn’t and the noise of constant judgement only clouded his mind further._

_“Mind you, jealously is unflattering.”_

_There was a laugh. “You can’t really blame Camille for being jealous though, most girls are when their ex moves on.”_

_Magnus took a deep breath. He needed to get out of here._

_“Still, beating him up won’t get him back.”_

_“I heard she tried to get him to cheat on Will or something”, one girl giggled._

_“No way”, the other laughed. “I bet he did as well. Sorry, but Magnus is such a slut it wouldn’t surprise me.”_

_Magnus quickly grabbed his books, throwing them into his bag as quickly as possible._

_“Well he must have done since Will ended it.”_

_One of the gaggle of teens gasped slightly. “Wow. I don’t care who you are, cheating is never okay.”_

_“I know right”, their friend added. “It’s never okay. Unless it’s like… forced then I guess it’s okay… y’know, since you didn’t chose to cheat?”_

_One girl scoffed loudly. “Like Magnus was forced! He’d fuck anything with a pulse.”_

_A cacophony of giggles assaulted Magnus as he slammed his locker shut and, ignoring the girls’ look of surprise and guilt, raced down the hall and as far from prying eyes as he could._

“I’m gonna kill her, Izzy.”

Izzy raised an eyebrow at Magnus. “Me too”, she vowed.

Magnus remained frozen, staring at the sheets. Izzy watched him as he nodded slowly. "I love him so much”, he said softly.

Izzy smiled softly. "I know you do, Mags. I know" 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay guys, I hope you liked this one. The pace was very choppy but I did that to sort of represent the fear and anxiety everyone is collectively feeling.
> 
> Now... first of all, something said in this chapter will prove to be very important in the last few chapters of this story. I wonder if any of you can guess down below ;)
> 
> Besides that, there are only a few more chapters left for this story but I am thinking and kind of planning some ideas for a sequel. Let me know what you guys would think about a sequel but if you dont dig it, I'll just tie the story up in the remaining chapters I have planned. Either way, there are only a few left (maybe 3 or 4) so watch out for those ;) 
> 
> P.S - if you chose sequel.... you'll love this stories cliffhanger ;)


	26. Support System

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec finds comfort in more of his friends and the arms of Magnus.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys mentioned that you missed Simon last chapter so here he is with all his adorableness ;)
> 
> This chapter is a little shorter but this is a bit of a filler so apologies. Next chapter will be a LOT longer ;)
> 
> ENJOY

 

 

 

* * *

 

Chapter 26

Over the course of 24 hours, not a lot changed for Magnus and Izzy, who remained at Alec’s bedside the entire time. Alec was still refusing to talk but was far more vocal than the prior day; asking for medication, complaining about pain or inquiring about recovery. It was nice to see that despite the trauma he had faced, he hadn’t completely shut down.

Not long after Alec woke up, Raphael had arrived and immediately shooed Magnus and Izzy away to the cafe for breakfast. He had been pestering Alec ever since.

“Barry said you don’t have to go back if you don’t want to. He said he could look into getting you transferred or he would write you a letter of recommendation”, Raphael said as he slumped into a chair beside Alec’s bed.

Alec recoiled slightly, looking confused. “I’m not leaving the bar, Raph.”

Raphael raised an eyebrow at Alec sceptically. “Seriously?”

“Yes, I’m serious”, Alec insisted. “I’m not letting that… bitch run me out of my job.”

Raphael watched Alec for a moment, curious to see if he would show any signs of what had happened the day before but it appeared that Alec was putting on a brave face. Raphael knew rather than to pester Alec into changing his mind and simply nodded.

“Okay”, he said simply.

Alec looked a little stunned, as though he had expected Raphael to protest, but smiled slightly. “I know you’re worried Raph, but I’m not going to let this rewrite my life.”

Raphael sighed, “You can’t ignore the effect it’s having on you either though.”

“I’m not”, Alec protested sternly. “I’m well aware of the effect its having; I panic every time someone enters the damn room just in case it’s her, I’m scared to go to the toilet in case I see the damage she’s gone, I’m scared of going home in case she’s there, ready to “fix me” again. Trust me, I’m not ignoring the effect.”

Raphael deflated, eyes sorrowful and mouth downturned. “Are you sure you’re okay, Alec?”

Alec looked at Raphael deeply in the eye for a moment, attempting to prove just how serious and truthful his answer was. “Seriously, I _am_ okay.”

“Okay”, Raphael said, rolling his eyes. “Are you good?”

Alec smiled involuntarily and shook his head fondly. “Raphael”, he chastised by way of answering. “Drop it.”

Raphael huffed dramatically but nodded. “So”, he said nervously after a moment. “When are you getting out of here?”

Alec shrugged. “Not sure. The doctor wants to keep an eye on my neck but he said he’s confident the stitches are all good. Hopefully today but who knows.”

Raphael smiled softly. “Okay, I’ll talk to him later and see what’s happening. I assume Magnus might be staying at ours for a while?”

Alec looked a little uncomfortable, eyes locked on his hands rather than Raphael. “I don’t know”, he admitted. “I haven’t really asked.”

Raphael nodded slowly. “Okay, well ask then.” Alec looked awkward and Raphael, who himself felt lost for words, decided to distract Alec with something else. “By the way, just as a warning I wanted to let you know that Simon’s on his wa-”

“-Alec!”

Alec startled, jerking in his bed and looking up hastily to see Simon slouched in the doorway. Alec vaguely saw Raphael roll his eyes out of the corner of his view.

“How are you?”

Alec blinked rapidly, trying to make himself focus. He looked at Simon and smiled slightly. “I’m doing okay Simon, how are you?”

“Me?” Simon squeaked. “I’m not the one who got attacked by the she-devil!”

Raphael hissed a warning under his breath which immediately made Simon pale. Before he could apologise however, Alec shook his head. “It’s cool Simon. Even if I got attacked by a she-devil, it doesn’t mean I’m fragile.”

Simon nodded slowly, gulping awkwardly. “Okie dokie”, he mumbled, sliding into the seat opposite Raphael. He exchanged a soft look with his boyfriend, one that clearly offered support, before turning back to Alec. “So what was it like?”

Alec paled slightly and Raphael gaped.

Simon looked confused for a moment before he suddenly lept from his seat. “No! I meant the stitches!”

Alec quickly swallowed the lump in his throat and forced a laugh from himself, ignoring Raphael’s knowing eyes. “It was weird but I wasn’t really paying attention.”

Simon looked rather sheepish as he nodded. “Maybe I’ll just go”, he mumbled awkwardly, nodding to the door.

Alec could practically feel the guilt rolling off of Simon in waves and with a grumble and a shake of his head, he caught Simon’s arm and pulled him into a small hug. Simon squeaked out a gasp in surprise, but returned the gesture.

“You can stay”, Alec said softly as he pulled away. “How about you distract me with pointless book trivia?”

Simon immediately perked up, grinning wildly. “Sure! Can it be TV instead though?”

Alec burst into laughter, ignoring the pain in his neck in favour of watching the pride of Simon’s face when he noticed he made Alec chuckle. Alec shook his head fondly. “Whatever you want”, he said, voice light with amusement.

Simon beamed and quickly immersed himself deep in conversation with Alec about the latest episode of some weird zombie show and how some random guy called “Negan” may have killed. Alec had no idea what he was talking about but he indulged Simon, for he knew that Simon’s rambling would not only calm Raphael, but would also calm him. It was the only thing that felt natural while lying in a foreign room, wearing foreign clothes.

 

…

 

“Doctor Bennett said you can leave today if you want to”, Magnus said softly as he rubbed his thumb gently over Alec’s calloused hands.

Alec took a deep breath before nodding. “Okay. I-I think I want to.”

Magnus smiled encouragingly, bringing Alec’s hand up to place a delicate kiss on the skin. Alec blushed slightly, cheeks growing hot as Magnus met his eyes. “I love when you blush”, Magnus sighed dramatically.

Alec rolled his eyes but knew that his cheeks were only growing darker. “Shut up”, he mumbled teasingly.

Magnus smirked, his eyes holding something mischievous in them. “Fine”, he said rather calmly, which made Alec suspicious.  

“What?”

Magnus raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean ‘what’?”

Alec looked at Magnus, deadpan. “You know what. Now, what is it you’re thinking?”

Magnus laughed nervously but shook his head. “Nothing. It’s nothing, truly Alexander.”

Alec gave Magnus a look that clearly said he didn’t believe him but Magnus either didn’t see or chose to ignore it. “Whatever”, Alec relented, sighing. “But you’ll tell me eventually.”

“Oh, will I?”

Alec watched as Magnus’ usual flirty tone returned. “Eventually”, he vowed.

Magnus looked somewhat challenged and, puffing his chest out, grinned. “Okay Alexander. For that, you’re never finding out.”

“Oh I’m sure you could keep a secret for the rest of your life Magnus”, Alec said sarcastically. “You can barely keep what you ate for breakfast to yourself!”

Magnus snorted. “You’ve got me there darling”, he said playfully. After a moment or two, his smile fell and he simply watched Alec for a few seconds.

Up until that moment, it hadn’t hit him that, technically, he could have _lost_ Alec yesterday. Had Camille decided to up her game and do anything more damaging that what she already had, Alec may have been lost to him forever. Watching him in that moment made it clear to Magnus that Alexander was more than just a miracle.

“Stay with me”, he heard himself say.

Alec furrowed his brows in confusion. “What do you mean?”

Magnus sighed softly, pulling his chair forward to catch Alec’s hand in his. “I mean, come stay at my place for a while. I don’t want to be presumptuous but I want to there for you at the moment Alec and I feel like, to be honest, I’m the best person to talk you through this. I- I love you, and after yesterday I need to know you’re okay.”

Alec stared deeply into Magnus’ eyes, heartbroken by the fear he saw in them. “Okay”, he whispered breathlessly.

Magnus beamed. “Okay.”

 

 

...

 

 

Truth be told, Alec was beyond grateful that Magnus had suggested it. Despite knowing how much the decision would hurt Raphael, Alec knew that being near Magnus was something he needed now more than ever. If he ever wanted to familiarise himself with intimacy again, he would have to do it with Magnus and he would have to do it slowly. Luckily, due to his job, Magnus lived very close to Pandemonium so Alec would have no problem seeing Izzy and Jace frequently, that and the bar he and Raphael worked at was only down the road. Being a little closer to his friends and to Magnus was something he was already grateful for and he hadn’t even got there yet.

After being discharged with many forms of medication and many words of advice, Alec insisted that he drive them to Magnus’ place. Izzy, as was expected, insisted she come. In the end, Magnus, Izzy, Jace, Clary and Raphael and Simon in the car behind, were heading over to Magnus’.

“Are you stoked up though? Because Alec eats so much.”

“Izzy!” Alec moaned from the driver’s seat. “Shut up!”

Magnus smirked. “I’m sure we’ll be fine, Izzy. Have you decided when you’ll head back to work Alexander?”

Alec ignored Izzy’s displeased grumbling behind him; he knew she wasn’t pleased with him heading back there. Instead of paying her any mind, he smiled at Magnus. “Maybe next week, although I’m not sure.”

Magnus nodded. “Okay.”

“It’s so weird”, Jace said from the backseat. “To think that Alec was the last one to get a boyfriend in the first place yet is moving in with him first.”

Alec rolled his eyes. “I’m not moving in Jace. It’s only for a little while.”

“Also”, Izzy intervened. “Technically Alec isn’t the last one to get a boyfriend. Unless you need to tell us something Jace.”

Magnus snorted out a hefty laugh, reaching back to high-five Isabelle.

Jace grumbled impatiently.  “Alec, are we almost there?”

“We left the hospital like 10 minutes ago”, Alec sighed.

“Yeah”, Jace complained. “A whole ten minutes ago. Also, should you be driving with your stitches?”

Alec blinked in surprise at the sudden change of topic but shrugged. “Probably not but… I need a bit of normality right now.”

Jace went quiet, exchanging a silent look with Isabelle. Knowing that their worry was no doubt stressing Alec out, Magnus reached over and rested his hand on Alec’s thigh. Unlike the night they spent at Jace’s, the move wasn’t intended to be sexual.

It was just, yet again, another sign of Magnus’ unwavering support.

 

 

…

 

  
“Alec”, Catarina sighed in relief as she wrapped her arms around him. She held him close, breathing deeply into his neck as he hugged him. Alec chuckled slightly, sinking into her embrace and holding her back.

“How are you?” she asked as she pulled away, holding him at a distance.

Alec shrugged with a muted smile. “I’m okay”, he nodded. “I’m pretty… disturbed but I’ll be okay.”

Catarina nodded. “Understandable”, she said, smiling softly.

Alec snickered, “yeah.”

“I don’t have to hug you do I?”

Alec looked up and laughed when he saw the displeased look on Ragnor’s face. “No”, he said, laughing. “You don’t have to hug me Ragnor, don’t worry.”

Ragnor smirked for a moment before sending Alec a stern look. “I’m glad you’re okay Alec. Mainly because Magnus would blow my ears off complaining if you weren’t but also because… well y’know.”

“Awww!” Magnus teased loudly. “Does Ragnor like Alec by any chance?”

Ragnor frowned and waved Magnus away. “I have a far higher tolerance for Alexander than I do you, Magnus.”

Simon snorted as he and Raphael entered. “Friendship goals”, he teased sarcastically.

Alec smiled softly as he watched his friends interact around him. With a grin, he watched as Magnus ran after Ragnor, arms open and ready for a hug. He watched as Izzy, Clary and Jace, all ignorant of their previous problems, headed to the kitchen to dish up the takeout Catarina had ordered. He watched as Cat, Raphael and Simon all began to head to the main room to sit and talk. Before they did however, Raphael turned back and smiled at Alec.

Quickly, Alec joined them, feeling more and more at home with each passing moment.

It was amazing to spend the night with his friends, all of them ignorant to the outside world and to the drama that had unfolded 24 hours prior. None of them looked at him any differently, none of them fussed or worried and for that Alec was grateful. To feel normal again made every bad though evaporate and every fear seem irrational.

 

 

….

 

“Magnus will you stop worrying! This isn’t the first time we’ve shared a bed”, Alec sighed as he settled further into the pillows surrounding him.

The others had headed home not long ago and after a shower, Alec had headed to bed in Magnus’ room. Magnus, after talking to Catarina for a while, joined him but had immediately begun fussing and preparing himself to sleep on the couch.

“Yeah”, Magnus sighed, “But that was before… everything.”

“You mean before Camille? Come on Magnus, you can say it.”

Magnus shifted uncomfortably but nodded. “Fine. Before Camille and what she did. It’s… different now.”

Alec took a deep breath and sat up on his knees, reaching across to catch Magnus’ hands and draw him close. Magnus stood against the bed and looked down at Alec as the younger man made a point of meeting his eyes.

“Magnus, have I ever shied away from your affection?”

Magnus sighed deeply as he watched Alec, well aware where Alec was going with this. “No”, he finally said.

Alec smiled softly. “Exactly. And that’s not changing, certainly not because of Camille of all people. So please, just get into bed and hold me like I know you want to.”

Magnus looked deeply into Alec’s eyes for any doubt but found none. Relenting, Magnus pulled his hands free of Alec’s and moved to the other side of the bed before sliding in slowly. Alec watched his every move, aware that Magnus was being overly cautious.

When Magnus settled into the covers, Alec made a point of curling up into his side and burying his head in Magnus’ neck.

“I’m not letting her take this away from me”, he vowed quietly against Magnus’ skin.

Magnus closed his eyes tightly for a moment, overwhelmed, before leaning down to press a kiss to Alec’s hair. “I love you.”

Alec hummed appreciatively. “I know”, he said softly, pressing a matching kiss to Magnus’ neck. “I love you too.”

Magnus blinked away his tears, tightening his arms around Alec, before reaching over and switching off the light.

Alec slept well that night, cushioned in Magnus’ arms and protected from any thought or nightmare of Camille.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay my lovelies! I have NEWS!
> 
> I have decided to do the sequel (yay!) but I have also decided to make next chapter the last chapter. That's right, you heard (read) me correctly. The LAST CHAPTER. 
> 
> BUT... I say this now because I'm planning to make it nice and long and nice and jam-packed with adorableness and drama and that all important cliffhanger I have promised. For this reason however, I am not uploading it in two days. I am instead planning to upload it on TUESDAY. So... keep that in mind and be sure to check in on the story then because that is when it will be uploaded. I'll explain the details of the sequel in the end note of the next chapter. But be excited. 
> 
> ALSO, if there is anything you want to see next chapter before the cliffhanger, let me know down below and I'll be sure to add it in as a little nod to you guys who have been AMAZING! I seriously love you all <3
> 
> So, let me know what you thought of this chapter down below and what you want to see in the final chapter ;) X
> 
> Follow my tumblr (justmagnusbane) for updates about the sequel :D


	27. Downhill (Final Chapter)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I want to be with the man that I love, knowing that even if someone else touched me first, you’re the one that’s going to touch me last.”
> 
>  
> 
> Maybe its not that easy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMG its the last chapter... can you believe it?! 
> 
> First of all, I seriously need to thank every single one of you who has read my story (yes you! lying in bed reading it right now!). You've all been amazing and supportive and critical (in a good way) and I hope that the story has been enjoyable for you all. 
> 
> You guys were asked last chapter what you wanted this chapter and whether or not you've got it:  
> 1) Clizzy ☑  
> 2) Malec ☑ ☑ ☑  
> 3) Saphael ☑ (although admittedly not a lot, dont worry though because we have a sequel ;D )  
> 4) Jace having a (possibly male?) crush ☑  
> 5) Alec and Raphael bonding ☑  
> 6) Malec... sex? ☐ (I'll let you fill that one in yourself)
> 
> So, you hopefully have all that you asked for. So, go ahead and please enjoy this 12,500 WORD CHAPTER! OMFGFSGKGSL O.o
> 
> WARNINGS: mild swearing, mentions of past attempted rape, smut, character death

Chapter 27

The first few days staying with Magnus were slow, filled with quiet moments and time alone. While the time alone made Alec nervous – the idea of the door opening to reveal Camille all too tempting an idea for his deluded mind to entertain – but he found that the time alone left him alone with his thoughts.

When Magnus had headed back to work, Alec had been worried to be alone. He knew that, thus far, he had perhaps been scarily calm with the entire situation and the idea of being home alone had only made the idea of him snapping even more terrifying. Alec was somewhat proud to say that he had done no such thing.

The time alone had instead given him the time he needed, away from his family and friends, to absorb what had happened. In the past few days, his entire life had been flipped upside down; he had been sexually assaulted, left with almost life-ending injuries and had moved out of his home and moved in to temporarily stay with his boyfriend.

How Alec felt about all of that was… confusing. In regards to Camille, Alec found that he didn’t really feel an awful lot; sure he felt anger, resentment and disgust but besides that, nothing. When thinking about what had happened that day at work, Alec felt nothing, save a little embarrassment.

That frightened him. To only feel embarrassment about your attempted rape was… not normal. Wasn’t he supposed to feel lost? Dirty? He wasn’t allowed to feel at peace with it yet, surely? Not after only a few days.

And yet, no matter how hard he tried to dig deeper into his feelings, Alec continued to find nothing. If anything, he felt more emotion about moving out than he did Camille’s assault.

That sense of confusion was what eventually sent Alec directly to the most rational person he could think of.

Raphael.

“Explain.”

Alec rolled his eyes slightly as he looked across the kitchen table at Raphael. “I already did.”

Raphael shook his head and raised a rather intimidating finger to point it at Alec. “No”, he said. “You said how you feel but you didn’t explain it. So, explain.”

“In what way?” Alec sighed, growing more and more impatient with his best friend.

Raphael shrugged. “Figure it out.”

Alec took a moment to glare at Raphael before he spoke. “I don’t know how to explain it other than… like a mental shrug, y’know? When I think about what she did I just…. shrug it off. It doesn’t mean anything to me and I don’t understand why.”

Raphael looked baffled but nodded slowly. “I don’t really know what to say, Alec. The only person I have helped who has been through the same thing is Magnus and he pretty much forged a route to recovery on his own. He was detached, didn’t seem to care about it, ignored how he felt regarding Camille. He kept it all bottled up and you’ve seen the damage that did him.”

Alec nodded. “So… what? You think I’m ignoring my own feelings? Bottling it up?”

Raphael let out a large exhale. “I really don’t know, Alec. I’m not a therapist so I have no idea what you’re thinking. Have you… have you actually spoken about it?”

Alec took a moment to think; had he spoken about it? Besides answering basic questions for a doctor, Alec hadn’t. Magnus and Izzy had both pestered him to open up and yet he hadn’t. He had insisted that he was fine.

Was he fine?

“No”, he admitted somewhat shamefully, bowing his head.

Raphael nodded with a deep sigh. “Then let’s talk.”

Alec looked up at his best friend to determine if he was serious. The deep, steady stare of Raphael Santiago proved to be no joke, and Alec agreed silently with a tip of his head.

“Okay”, Raphael began. “Explain what happened.”

Alec froze, looking at Raphael with a sort of horror. “What do you mean ‘explain what happened’? All of it?”

Raphael filed away the fear on Alec’s face for a later date, knowing that that fear was telling of just how much emotion Alec was suppressing. He simply nodded.

Alec swallowed deeply, shifting uncomfortably in his chair as he attempted to find words to say. His eyes fluttered as they attempted to hold back tears and Alec felt his chest constrict a little bit.

All this and he hadn’t even started.

“I, er… I went to the back room”, he stuttered. “I was out of, er… peach schnapps and I went to get s-some. It was supposed to be quick trip, in and out, but when I turned around…. Camille… she was there.”

Alec didn’t notice the way Raphael had sat up a little straighter at the sound of her name falling from Alec’s lips but Raphael sure noticed the tell-tale signs of Alec growing uncomfortable.

“She told me that she saw me leave and she was… worried for me. She told me that she wanted to help me. I t-told her I didn’t need help to carry two bottles and then she said-”

Alec cut himself off, dropping his head to his hands for a moment to take a deep, steadying breath. Raphael reached over and gently laid a hand on Alec’s shoulder, wary of the way Alec jerked slightly in alarm at the contact.

Alec exhaled loudly before removing his hands, rubbing his eyes for a moment to compose himself. When he was calm again, he refused to meet Raphael’s eyes.

“She told me that she didn’t come to help me with the bottles. She said she wanted to help me understand what was… wrong with me. She said I was s _ick.”_

Raphael winced slightly, reminded of another time Alec had been called such a word, and by a far more important woman in his life. Gritting his teeth, he looked back to Alec.

To his surprise, Alec met his gaze, but the look in them was vacant.

“She wanted to fix me”, Alec whispered, voice growing more and more powerless. “She called me Alexander, Raph.”

Raphael winced at the tone of voice Alec used, one of defeat, hopelessness. The lost look on Alec’s face only made Raphael’s heart ache all the more.

Raphael was not unaware of how important Alec found names; after being called such horrible ones by his family, he had always grown attached to any kind of affectionate name he was given.

Raphael knew just how important it was for Alec to hear his full name said by someone who loved him, purely to show him affection. ‘Alexander’ meant a lot to Alec and it was something only Magnus said. Raphael knew how heartbroken Alec was now that Camille had said it, effectively taking it away from both him and Magnus.

“She called me baby too.”

Raphael was immediately reminded of the night in the RV, wrapped in Simon’s heavy limbs as he slept. He had been woken up by the rather disgusting noises of Magnus and Alec growing a little too close against the side of the RV, the name baby falling from Magnus’ lips often, showering over Alec multiple times.

_“What is it about that word that makes you so weak in the knees, Alexander?” Magnus asked hoarsely, voice rough._

_Alec shook his head almost frantically. “I don’t know”, he whispered, panting slightly._

“What did she do Alec?”

Alec shuddered slightly, his eyes falling shut. His voice was rough and strained when he spoke. “She touched my chin and when I hit her hand away she… she stepped between my legs and… grabbed my hair and my neck. I t-tried to… stop her from t-touching my- from touching me but it made her angry. That’s when she started with the nails.”

Raphael nodded slowly, well aware of how Alec had begun to shake slightly. Alec’s hands curled into fists on the table top and his shoulders shook.

“How did that make you feel Alec?”

Alec’s breath was falling shorter now, growing close to pants. “Helpless. I-I thought she was going to do it, really do it. I… I thought no one would come. I felt weak… I felt pathetic; I couldn’t even push her away.”

“That wasn’t your fault”, Raphael insisted. “You were in shock and then she attacked your neck, you had no chance of getting her off.”

Alec shook his head. “I could have… I could have shouted, kicked her, anything! I didn’t think she was actually going to do it.”

“Do what?” Raphael urged. “Say it, Alec.”

Alec looked up at Raphael, tears gathering in his eyes and lips curled into an unpleasant smile. “Rape me”, he whispered breathlessly, his body immediately sinking under the weight of the words. He had used them before, even in regards to himself, but never had he taken the time to acknowledge what that meant and what it would have meant if she had succeeded.

Raphael grabbed Alec’s shoulder, squeezing it as Alec shuddered.

“Why would she do that?” Raphael heard Alec whimper into his hands.

Raphael’s heart tore in two. “Because sometimes when people do terrible things… it’s just because they’re terrible people.”

 

…

 

“You did his makeup? I highly doubt it”, Clary giggled as she swatted Magnus’ hands away. “Alec’s not one to put up with that sort of crap.”

Magnus snorted slightly but nodded in agreement. “You’re right”, he laughed, taking a step back from where he had hugged Clary in greeting. “He’d kill me before I got near his eyes with a pencil.”

Clary smirked slightly before her eyes became calm and her smile became strained. “How is he?”

Magnus took a deep breath. “Now that’s a loaded question”, he said mockingly. Clary saw right through his comedic façade and grimaced.

“Magnus”, she urged softly.

Magnus swallowed deeply before speaking. “I don’t know”, he admitted. “Some days he’s fine but others… I remember what she did to him and I worry. He’s not talking about it and he’s not even really reacting. I told him that Camille’s trial date had been set and he just… shrugged.”

Clary looked sympathetic as she nodded. “When is it?”

“Couple of weeks”, Magnus sighed, sinking onto the bench situated against the wall of the dance studio. Clary sat beside him.

“How are you feeling about it?”

Magnus shrugged. “I don’t know. I guess I’m nervous… I know I’ll have to testify against her.”

Clary rested her hand on Magnus’ knee reassuringly. “You don’t have to testify if you don’t want to.”

Magnus quirked an eyebrow. “And let he get away with trying to rape my boyfriend? No thanks.”

Clary sighed; he had a point. “You’ve got me there”, she relented. “Do you know if Raphael will have to testify?”

“I suspect Raphael, Sasha _and_ Barry will be testifying.”

Clary nodded thoughtfully. “Izzy hasn’t spoken a lot”, she gradually admitted. “She’s weirdly quiet about the whole thing.”

Magnus tipped his head back to rest against the studio’s mirrored wall and let out a deep breath. “She has seemed pretty worked up about it all at work lately. She dances more… I don’t know, aggressively?”

“She feels responsible”, Clary sighed. “She told me that she doesn’t know what to do, that she feels like she can’t help her big brother. She feels pretty crappy about it lately.”

Magnus nodded. “Understandable.”

Clary looked over at him and smiled sadly; she suspected that Magnus felt as powerless as Izzy in this situation. Loving someone who had been so badly broken, left scars of even the most resilient of people, including Magnus.

“We’ll move past it eventually. We… we can’t let what happened to him control our lives and our futures”, Clary said softly.

Magnus _hummed_ thoughtfully before nodding. “Yeah. You’re right.”

 

 

…

 

 

Jace shoved his keys in his pocket as he headed towards the entrance to Clary’s apartment block. He let himself in, his spare key still not confiscated due to some of his things still being at Clary’s.

As he entered Clary’s place, he could hear her voice coming from the kitchen. He approached, her voice growing more and more clear.

“It was still great to meet you. If you change your mind, give me a call and we can discuss rent.”

Jace raised an eyebrow- so she was entertaining a possible roommate. Jace straightened up and headed towards the kitchen, only to be forced to a stop when he collided with a large object.

Jace stumbled back involuntarily, his eyes widening when he met the gaze of who he had bumped into.

The man was of a build very similar to Jace’s but he was slightly taller. He had dark, ruffled hair that reached just above his eyes, no doubt sweeping across and tickling his forehead. He was a man that obviously took pride in his appearance for his face was cleanly shaven and his skin was clear and plump. His skin tone perfectly complemented the deep green of his eyes and his smile was, frankly, quite bright.

“Sorry man”, he chuckled, steadying Jace.

Jace found his voice lost and stared at the man with dazed eyes. “Yeah, er… it’s… it’s cool.”

The brunet laughed deeply and nodded before sidestepping around Jace and heading towards the door. Jace couldn’t resist watching him.

“Bye Clary, bye Izzy! I’ll let you know!” he shouted into the kitchen. “Nice meeting you”, he nodded to Jace.

Jace smiled, nodding frantically as he watched the potential roommate exit with a nod.

“Seriously?”

Jace spun around to face Izzy, who stood in the doorway of the kitchen with her hands on her hips. “What?” Jace demanded.

“Did you _seriously_ just check Ryan out? He’s a dude!”

Jace narrowed his eyes when he heard Clary laugh from the kitchen. Glaring at Izzy, he headed inside and took a seat opposite Clarissa.

“I did _not_ check him out”, Jace insisted, snatching a small cookie from the plate in front of Clary.

Izzy snorted rather loudly. “You so did! And you say you’re straight…”

Jace shot Izzy a warning look as he angrily took a bite of the cookie. “Just because I’m comfortable enough in my sexuality to check out the same sex does _not_ mean I’m gay!”

“So you admit you were checking him out?” Clary piped up.

Jace spun to look at Clary, who was hiding her mouth behind her hand as she laughed wholeheartedly. He set her a tired look. “Fine, I was checking him out.”

Izzy and Clary immediately squealed, grabbing each other as they folded in half laughing. Clary gripped Izzy to ensure she didn’t fall out of her chair as she laughed.

Much to Jace’s chagrin, it took the girls a while to calm down. For a solid 10 minutes they continued to tease, but not once did Jace shy away from his admission; he might be straight but he was allowed to find a human being attractive.

“I thought you found a roommate, Clary?"

Clary finally began to calm down. She shook her head. “No, originally it was supposed to be this woman called Claire but she just randomly called the other day and said no. She was… really weird actually.”

“Weird how?” Izzy piped up as she joined them at the table, bottled water in hand.

Clary shrugged. “I don’t know, she just felt a little bit sketchy. She asked about the picture I have from the trip; she saw Magnus and asked who he was.”

“What’s sketchy about that?” Jace asked, not unkindly. “Maybe she thought he was hot.”

Izzy giggled. “Don’t tell Alec that. He always has been the jealous sort.”

Clary frowned as she watched Jace and Izzy laugh but cracked a small smile when they looked her way. Quickly deciding to change the subject, she turned to Izzy and smiled affectionately.

“So”, Clary finally said after both of them had settled down. “Have you guys heard from Magnus?”

Izzy seemed to mistake Clary’s affectionate smile for one of sympathy and immediately panicked.

“No, why?” Izzy frantically asked. “Is something wrong? Is it Alec?”

Clary quickly grabbed Izzy’s hand, squeezing it. “No babe, Alec is fine. It’s just about Camille.”

Jace bristled slightly. “What about Camille?”

“Her trial date has been set”, Clary informed. “Magnus said it was only a couple of weeks away.”

Jace frowned slightly. “Is Magnus worried about it then?”

Clary shrugged helplessly. “He said she has pretty powerful people on her side, money and all that, but apart from that and having to testify, I don’t think so.”

“He doesn’t think she’ll get away with it, does she?” Izzy asked, voice laced with panic.

Clary looked a little panicked at the idea as well but she shook her head. “I really don’t know, he didn’t say anything. He just said that he found out she was getting involved with some decently powerful people, that’s all I know.”

“Powerful people? Like who?” Jace said, voice slightly gruff with poorly-concealed fear.

Again Clary had no answer. “He just said that; powerful people. Mind you, I didn’t think she had money? I thought that was why she worked at the bar?”

Izzy looked equally as put out. “Yeah me too”, she agreed. “Maybe she has a sugar daddy or something.”

Jace immediately cringed. “Jeez, guys! That’s gross!”

Clary nodded, gritting her teeth and cringing. “Yeah Iz, that was super gross.”

“Well sorry!” Izzy giggled, smirking. “Beside the point, I’ll go over tonight and ask Magnus about it maybe.”

Jace sat up a little straighter. “We can all go, I haven’t visited Alec today anyway. Yeah?”

Izzy shrugged, “If you want”, she agreed. Izzy looked over at Clary for confirmation who nodded, smiling softly.

Jace looked between the girls; while he loved and supported them, the look in their eyes was rather too… personal for him. Quickly, he excused himself and agreed on a time to meet at Magnus’ loft. He left soon after, ignoring their playful teasing about that Ryan guy.

When Izzy shut the door behind Jace she immediately turned back to her girlfriend, frown prominent. Clary raised an eyebrow as she waited for Izzy to speak.

“What the hell could he be talking about; powerful people?”

Clary took a deep breath. “I really don’t know, Iz. Camille is pretty manipulative so maybe… maybe she’s just got with some pretty high-up people in the lawyer world.”

“If she gets a better lawyer and beats us in this case…” Izzy trailed off, unable to finish her thought.

Clary nodded and stepped towards Izzy, wrapping her arms around her quickly and pulling her close. “I know”, Clary sighed. “She won’t though, okay? We won’t let her.”

Izzy nodded against Clary, subconsciously finding herself burying her face in Clary’s chest. Clary giggled slightly but it faded when she heard Izzy’s tell-tale sniffles. Her immediate response was to hold Izzy even closer and press a soft kiss to her forehead.

“I’ll kill her before I let her get away with what she did to Alec”, Izzy vowed quietly.

“And Magnus.”

Izzy pulled away slightly. “About that”, she said gently. “When did you find out about what she did to Magnus?”

Clary looked a little confused for a moment. “Iz, everyone from the trip knows she did something wrong. Most people knew the exact story for quite a while but those that didn’t figured it out pretty quickly after what happened to Alec.”

“So Jace and Simon know then?”

Clary nodded. “Magnus has spoken to them though, he’s okay with them knowing.”

Slowly, Izzy nodded but there was a sort of strain to her face. “I just worry about him too y’know? Pretty soon he has to testify and then… everyone he knows, and more, will know.”

Clary took a deep breath and shrugged, smiling sadly. “What can we do about it though, Iz?”

Izzy blinked back tears as she met Clary’s sad eyes. “I know”, she admitted.

Clary smiled softly before pulling Izzy back into her arms and kissing her, something that immediately made Izzy relax.

 

 

…

 

 

When Magnus got home after work that day, admittedly earlier than usual, the last thing he expected was to open the door and immediately be attacked.

Before he had a moment to comprehend it, Alec was in his arms, burrowing his face into Magnus’ neck, a space that Magnus knew Alec had a secret love for. Magnus didn’t hesitate to respond, wrapping his arms around Alec with equal care. He could hear the panting of Alec’s breath on his neck and tightened his grip until Alec was pressed up against him in every way possible.

“What’s wrong, Alec?”

Alec made an incoherent mumbling noise against Magnus’ skin which made Magnus smile slightly. Pulling back just enough to hear Alec’s response, Magnus asked again.

“Nothing”, Alec said immediately.

Magnus rolled his eyes and pulled a little further back until he was holding Alec at arm’s length. Alec quickly wiped at his tears when he realised Magnus could now see them, an action which only made Magnus raise a judgemental eyebrow.

“Fine”, Alec mumbled. “Raphael came over today to keep me company. We got talking.”

“Okay”, Magnus said slowly, still unsure. “That sounds vaguely ominous.”

Alec sniffled slightly, something that, had he not seen the tears, would have given away Alec’s sadness immediately.

Alec smiled at Magnus’ words. “We were talking about how I haven’t really accepted what happened-”

“-With Camille?”

“With Camille”, Alec confirmed with a nod. “Anyway, basically he made me sit and just… talk about it. I guess it was just a little overwhelming.”

Magnus nodded slowly. Part of him was somewhat envious that Raphael had managed to get Alec to talk but the far larger part of him was grateful instead. He knew that reliving such a similar event was hard on Raphael as well as on him and he greatly appreciated just how far Raphael had gone to improve Alec’s recovery.

“Did it make you feel better? To talk about it?” Magnus asked softly as he reached up to brush a strand of stray hair from Alec’s eye.

Alec nodded, a blush forming at his cheeks due to Magnus’ actions. When Magnus’ hand cupped his cheek, Alec instantly leant into it, smiling involuntarily. “Yeah”, he whispered, eyes closed as he held Magnus close. “It helped a lot actually. Made it a lot easier to understand how I feel.”

Magnus smiled both at what Alec said but also at Alec’s response to his caress. Alec let out a sound that sounded vaguely like a moan when Magnus began to stroke his thumb over Alec’s cheek and pulled him slightly closer.

“And what is it that you feel?” Magnus asked softly.

Alec opened his eyes and looked up at Magnus from where he was slouched against him. He cracked a small smile. “I feel pretty sad about it mainly. I mean, sure I feel dirty and I feel angry and violated and scared but… I just sort of feel sad.”

“Sad about what?”

Alec took a deep breath, reaching up to gently stroke at Magnus’ lower lip. Magnus immediately froze, entranced, and allowed Alec to do it.

“She took so much away from us”, Alec admitted quietly as he wrapped his hands around Magnus’ neck. Magnus responded by wrapping his around Alec’s waist and pulling him closer.

“Like what?”

“Like ‘Baby’”, Alec sighed. “And just… intimacy.”

Magnus gave Alec a sympathetic look but shook his head. “She can only take that from you if you let her.”

Alec looked up at Magnus with moist eyes filled with something akin to awe. When Magnus smiled reassuringly, Alec couldn’t stop from biting his lip worriedly. “But what if that’s not true?”

Magnus sighed. He slowly reached up and once again took hold of Alec’s cheek. Alec looked at him with such adoration in that moment that Magnus didn’t feel an ounce of guilt for pulling Alec closer until their lips met.

Alec froze at first, having not kissed Magnus since their goodbyes in the early morning of the last day Alec attended work. The day Camille hurt him.

After a moment however, Alec realised what it was Magnus was attempting to do. If there was any way to show Alec how Camille hadn’t taken everything, it was this way. In response, Alec moaned and pulled Magnus’ mouth against his, something that, judging by Magnus’ own moan, he enjoyed.

Magnus kept a hold of Alec’s cheek as he manoeuvred Alec to turn his head, allowing Magnus the space to slip in his tongue. Alec gasped a little but soon settled into the kiss, growing more confident and comfortable with every passing moment.

Eventually, after a few minutes, Magnus had to pull away to take a gulp of air. The look of appreciation Alec gave him made him blush just a little.

“Thank you”, Alec whispered breathlessly.

Magnus grinned. “My pleasure”, he teased playfully.

Alec cracked a smile. Slowly he leant forward, dropping his hands to Magnus’ shoulders in order to steady himself. Magnus closed his eyes, expected a kiss but Alec stopped just short of just mouth.

“Say it”, Alec whispered.

Magnus kept his eyes closed but hummed in confusion, which caused Alec to chuckle slightly. The sound made Magnus’ heart race.

“I need you to… call me it, Magnus. I need to know if she took that too.”

Magnus nodded ever so slightly, finally understanding what Alec was asking of him. Ever so slowly, he leant forward until their lips brushed, pecking Alec before pulling away just enough for their lips to graze.

“I love you, baby.”

Magnus’ eyes remained closed so he didn’t see Alec’s slow smile but he did hear the ever so faint breath of relief Alec released and if that wasn’t confirmation enough, Alec’s kiss was. Alec kissed him passionately and actively encouraged Magnus to do the same.

“I love you too”, he mumbled against Magnus’ lips.

Magnus grinned, pulling back slightly to meet Alec’s eyes.

“You okay?”

Alec nodded, smiling. “I will be. I’m getting there”, he promised.

Magnus beamed. “That’s good to hear, baby.”

Alec giggled slightly at the name. “It’s a lot nicer to hear you say it”, he admitted quietly. “It makes me forget that she did.”

“I know”, Magnus said softly. He gently took Alec’s hand and began to lead him towards the main room, pulling him onto the couch and into his embrace.

For a few moments they sat in silence, basking in the peace that had evaded them for days. Magnus kissed Alec’s head softly, relief filling him when he realised that he was free to kiss his boyfriend again.

“You said her trial is in a few weeks?” Alec eventually asked after a good 15 minutes of silence.

Magnus nodded. “Yes.”

Magnus heard Alec exhale exaggeratedly. “Okay”, Alec said softly.

“You think you’ll be ready for that?”

Alec took a moment to respond. “If it puts her behind bars then yes.”

“Okay”, Magnus smiled gently. “Me too.”

 

 

…

 

 

Simon frowned as he watched Raphael pace. “You need to stop, Raph”, he insisted.

Raphael sent him a look that was clearly meant to scare him but Simon, very much used to Raphael’s glares, just rolled his eyes.

Finally relenting, Simon rose from his seat and headed across the room to Raphael. He quickly grabbed Raphael’s arms, forcing him to stop pacing and meet his eye.

“You need to calm down Raph, I’m serious. You need to be calm when you go in there because if you’re not you’ll blow up and I don’t particularly want you being arrested”, Simon said slowly, ending with a teasing smile.

Raphael watched him, taking deep breaths as he did. Eventually he nodded. “Yeah”, he agreed reluctantly. “You’re right.”

Simon nodded, pleased, and led Raphael back to their seats.

There they sat at their local police station where Camille Belcourt had been held for several days. Although Magnus claimed that she had been in contact with “powerful people” it seemed that no one was willing to pay her bail and Camille was sitting rot behind bars. It wasn’t hard for Raphael to admit that that made him happy.

Simon wasn’t particularly sure why they were here, besides giving Raphael a bit of relief. It appeared that Raphael did not want to bother with working through the situation himself but rather wanted to confront the criminal and get the answers that way. Raphael always had been impatient.

As he had explained to Simon, after a day of discussing the entire thing with Alec, Raphael found that he desperately needed one of Alec’s own questions answered and only Camille could answer it.

Why w _ould s_ he do this to him?

“Raph are you sure about this?” Simon found himself asking.

Raphael turned to Simon with a soft smile. “I love you, just trust me Si.”

Simon nodded slowly, sceptical. He quickly leant over to peck Raphael’s cheek in perhaps a poor display of support.

Raphael grinned.

“Mr Santiago?”

Raphael looked up and immediately saw the looming figure of the police officer standing in the doorway, obviously holding open the door for him. Raphael quickly got up after pressing his own kiss to Simon’s cheek. “Thank you”, he whispered as he began to head inside.

Simon sighed as he watched his boyfriend follow the police officer further into the prison where, hopefully, he would get some answers.

A buzz tore Simon from his thoughts and he quickly pulled his phone out in order to retrieve the text.

 

**_5:47pm_ **

_Tell me that Isabelle is lying when she tells me that you’re visiting Camille!_

 

Simon winced; Magnus. He knew he shouldn’t have told Clary.

 

**_5:47pm_ **

**_To Magnus_ **

_Don’t blame me! He needed answers!_

 

**_5:48pm_ **

**_From Magnus_ **

_He’ll get them at the trial… in 2 weeks time! Tell him to get his ass back here!_

 

**_5:50pm_ **

**_To Magnus_ **

_Small problem with that… he’s already gone inside o.O_

 

**_5:51pm_ **

**_From Magnus_ **

_….. I want you both here at 8. No later._

 

 

…

 

 

Magnus growled as he tossed his phone onto the opposite couch.

Alec, who was returning with drinks, raised an eyebrow. “You okay?”

Magnus took deep breaths and he closed his eyes, obviously attempting to calm himself down. “Not really”, he admitted after a moment.

Alec quickly sat by his side, resting his hand on Magnus’ arm. “What’s happened?”

“Raphael’s gone to visit Camille”, Magnus sighed.

Alec blinked, surprised. “He- what?”

Magnus nodded, feeling a similar sense of shock and confusion. “Yeah”, he agreed. “Tell me about it.”

Alec remained silent for a moment and simply stared at his hands. Perhaps he was having flashbacks, perhaps he was imagining how such a meeting would go but to be honest Magnus found he didn’t care. The very fact that Alec was having to think of anything to do with Camille made him fume.

“Magnus”, Alec said slowly, looking up at his boyfriend from under his lashes.

Magnus turned to Alec and found himself smiling softly. “Yeah?”

“Is Cat gonna be home soon?”

Magnus shrugged slightly. “Not for another few hours, why?”

“What would you do if I said I wanted us to have sex?”

Magnus gaped and, had he been drinking, he would have spit it out immediately. Whether it was shock at Alec’s words or shock at how he delivered them, Magnus wasn’t sure but nevertheless, he froze in surprise.

“What?” he demanded, all of a sudden leaping back into action.

Alec quickly sat up, grabbing Magnus’ hands in his and bringing them into his lap to force Magnus to look at him. “Hear me out”, Alec begged.

The sound of Alec begging undeniably made Magnus stop and calm down. Understanding that this would never be a decision Alec would take lightly, Magnus nodded, waiting for Alec to start speaking.

“After today I’ve realised you were right”, Alec began, speaking softly. “You’re right; she cant take anything from me unless I let her. Not intimacy, not love, not sex. She can’t take any of that from me-”

“-We are not having sex just so you can prove a point”, Magnus quickly interrupted, panic settling over his every limb.

Alec looked offended as he tore his hands from Magnus’. “That’s not why I want this you idiot!”

Magnus quickly composed himself and his panic, watching Alec’s face as is contorted in sadness.

“You seriously think I would risk ruining our relationship with sex I wouldn’t be ready for, all to prove a point?”

Magnus sighed. “Okay, no”, he admitted reluctantly. “Admittedly no, you wouldn’t.”

“Exactly”, Alec said firmly. “Now let me finish.”

Magnus nodded silently, unable to contain a small smile of pride when Alec rolled his eyes somewhat fondly.

“It’s not about proving a point”, Alec promised. “Honestly. It’s about the fact that, before everything happened, I wanted to be with you. I still do. I want to not only love you emotionally, but also physically. I want that with you. And yes, admittedly the whole Camille thing has changed my plans a little with all of this but it’s still what I want. I want to be with the man that I love, knowing that even if someone else touched me first, you’re the one that’s going to touch me last.”

Magnus watched Alec with wide eyes full of tears, absorbing every word that his boyfriend said. The devotion and love evident in every look Alec gave him and every word Alec said reminded Magnus of how blissful he had felt before everything with Camille took place.

Magnus shook his head slightly. “Alec, we can’t.”

“Why?” Alec demanded. “Because you’re worried about how Camille affected me? Well you know what, I’ve already told you how she made me feel; violated and dirty and sad. But why the hell should I let that stop me from feeling the complete opposite with you?”

“Alec”, Magnus sighed somewhat tiredly. “After what happened to me… I could barely look at myself. I had trouble showering, Alec. You can’t tell me that you’re comfortable enough already to be with me like that.”

Alec sighed, shaking his head slightly as he sat back, putting some distance between him and Magnus. “We’re different people Magnus”, Alec insisted. “I’m older, more mature and… this is a completely different situation. You wanna know how?”

Magnus remained silent, head bowed as he refused to look at Alec.

“The difference is”, Alec said firmly, “that she did what she did to you because she was jealous. She wanted to do what, in her eyes, would fix you. It was still wrong and horrific, but she arguably did that with her own fucked up good intentions. With me, everything she did was malicious. She didn’t want to fix me, she wanted to _break you_.”

Magnus looked up at Alec in shock but Alec simply continued, too worked up to even look at Magnus.

“The reason that that makes me and you different is because this wasn’t aimed at me in the first place”, Alec said. “She never wanted to hurt me and I know that. She wanted to hurt you. So, I’m not going to let what she did destroy me or destroy you, because that is what she wants. She wants to destroy what we have because she wants to destroy _you_.”

Alec was red in the face as he spoke and Magnus simply sat back to watch him and the emotions that passed across his face. Truth be told, Magnus was speechless.

Alec finally moved closer, taking Magnus’ hands again and speaking slightly softer, his voice distorted by his crying. “I am ready to be with you because I know, deep down, that Camille did what she did because she wants to hurt the man that I love. So, even if only for him, I am moving past it because I swear to God I will not see her wishes come true on this.”

Magnus felt a stray tear fall down his cheek, wetting his skin and making him feel vaguely free. Alec gently stroked the tear from below his eye before leaning forward to kiss the place he had caught it. Magnus took a deep breath as he did.

“I was ready to be with you before what happened and I am still ready now, regardless of what she tried to do. I said I wasn’t going to let her take this away from me, none of it. So, right now I want to completely ignore what she did because it isn’t relevant. I love you and I want to be with you _because_ I love you. Her violating me and hurting me does not change the way I feel about you or the way I feel about being intimate with you. All it does… is make me hate _her_.”

Magnus remained still as he looked over Alexander; he was sitting, back straight, the perfect image of strength. His eyes were unwavering and showed not an ounce of hesitation.

Magnus shook his head slightly as he thought. It would appear that Alec was ready but that begged the obvious question; was he? Was Magnus ready to be will Alec in that way, love Alec in a way he had never loved a man.

That then begged the question; did he love Alec like he had never loved another man? Did he love Alec more than he had ever loved before? That in and of itself was a difficult question with varying possible answers.

_Did Magnus love Alec?_

_Yes._

_Was he ready to show that love to other people?_

_He already had._

_Did he want to show that love to Alec?_

_…. Of course he did._

Magnus took a deep breath and met Alec’s gaze. Where he had formally appeared confident and strong, Alec know looked worried, even frightened. To ease his fear, Magnus quickly grabbed his hand and pulled it into his lap to hold.

“I love you, Alexander.”

Alec seemed baffled, no doubt having expected much different words to come from Magnus. Slowly, Alec smiled when he realised what Magnus had called him and how, unlike when Camille did, it felt comforting. Safe.

“I love you too.”

Magnus smiled gently and brought Alec’s hand up to his mouth to kiss it. Alec remained still, watching him, as he slowly kissed across the expanse of the back of Alec’s hand. Alec’s mouth parted involuntarily to release a short breath, something that motivated Magnus to kiss across his arm, up to his shoulder.

Magnus pulled Alec closer and kissed across his shoulder and along his collarbone. Alec, having always had a weakness for kisses on his neck, tipped his head back to improve Magnus’ access. Magnus’ hands wrapped around Alec’s waist and tightened when he heard Alec moan.

Quickly pulling away, Magnus looked up at Alec, who seemed vaguely dazed and confused. Alec smiled back.

“Are you sure?” Magnus asked quietly.

Alec’s eyes softened and he smiled widely. “I’m more than sure.”

Magnus nodded slowly, eyes filled with awe.

“Okay.”

 

 

…

 

 

Raphael followed the burly police officer, whose body was easily twice the size of his. And yet, despite the man’s size, it was not him who was making Raphael’s pulse race.

The idea of seeing Camille was daunting. On the day of the assault, Raphael had completely ignored her and even when finding Alec, not once did his eyes stray to her. Raphael had of course been aware of her, but his best friend had required his attention, not some psycho bitch.

That being said, he somewhat regretted not having met her eye for now he was too intimidated for his own comfort.

Soon enough, the officer approached a door with a small window at the top. Raphael didn’t bother wasting his time trying to peer through it and instead followed the officer inside.

The room wasn’t small but it also wasn’t large; it reminded Raphael of the size of Magnus’ kitchen- spacious but cosy. Opposite him were a row of chairs, sat in front of a window, each chair separated divided by wall. Raphael immediately noticed that he was not alone in the room and that several men and women were sat on one side of the glass, his side, talking to people on the other.

Raphael took a deep breath and followed the officer’s guiding hand until he reached a small, plastic chair. He quickly sat down in it, feeling his heart hammering in his chest.

Raphael waited patiently, staring at the unoccupied seat across from him, aware that soon that seat would be taken. The jail was an intimidating enough place to be without sitting in silence waiting for your worst nightmare to pay you a visit.

It wasn’t long before Raphael could hear the sound of a door opening and soon enough Camille entered. She was dressed in a loose fitting, orange, short sleeved jumpsuit. If the outfit looked foreign on her, then at least her facial expressions were familiar.

Raphael slowly reached for the phone beside him, eyes hard and locked on Camille.

“Raphael”, she sneered in greeting after sitting down and picking up the phone.

“Camille”, he greeted similarly.

Camille’s smile was venomous. “Why are you here?”

Raphael took a deep breath, leaning forward in his chair. “I want to know why.”

“Why what?” Camille asked blankly.

Raphael’s eyes darkened and he glared at her pointedly. “You know what, Camille. I just want answers. Why him? Why Alec?”

Camille slowly understood what he was asking and her growing smile indicated she liked the question. Sluggishly, Camille leant forward until her forehead was pressed up against the glass. This close, Raphael could see the slightly smudged, half removed makeup she still wore.

Camille’s smile had always managed to make Raphael cringe and now was no exception.

“You really wanna know?”

The way she delivered her words, the way she spoke, made Raphael tense. Her lips curled up viciously and her words were spat out as though they were poison. How she still managed to sound devious and taunting, Raphael didn’t know.

“Yes”, he growled. “I want to know.”

Camille grinned. “Why else other than the fact that he is… delicious.”

Raphael grit his teeth to stop from responding and instead raised an eyebrow. Camille quickly settled back in her chair with a giggle.

“Truth be told, Raphael, I don’t want to tell you. It’s pretty easy to work out.”

Raphael nodded. “You did it because of Magnus, didn’t you?” he sneered.

Camille shrugged, grinning. “Figure it out smartie pants.”

“If you did”, Raphael said darkly. “Let’s just say if Magnus was the one here right now, he’d have no problem killing you in a heartbeat.”

Camille laughed, the sound making Raphael wince from how deranged it appeared. “Oh Raphael, I wouldn’t threaten me in the middle of jail if I were you.”

Raphael laughed humourlessly, shaking his head. “You think I give a shit?”

Camille’s laughter died down and she looked Raphael over with calculating eyes. “Perhaps you should”, she said simply. Slowly, she brought her hand up the glass and pressed it against it.

Raphael raised an eyebrow, confused, but Camille simply nodded to her hand. Looking down, Raphael looked across her alabaster skin.

Two scars stood prominent against her pale skin, pink and risen. They were small and hidden under the crease of her thumb but they were there. And they were letters.

“What does that mean?”

Camille immediately removed her hand from the glass and settled back in her chair. She shook her head slightly.

“You wanna know why I did what I did? Why I came to LA?”

Raphael watched Camille with wide, curious eyes. “Yes.”

Camille looked almost sad for a moment as she shrugged. “He made me.”

“Who’s ‘he’?” Raphael demanded, sitting forward quickly, hands tightening around the phone.

Camille nodded to her hand. “Figure it out”, she said softly. “I can’t.”

Raphael looked away, growing angry. “He didn’t make you try and rape Alec, whoever the fuck ‘he’ is!”

Raphael vaguely noticed the officer against the wall behind him shift a little, obviously wary of his aggression. Raphael paid him no mind.

Camille shook her head slightly. “No, he didn’t. That was a bit of fun on my part.”

“Fun?!” Raphael screeched, jumping from his seat and slapping his hand to the glass with a growl. “Fucking fun?!”

“Hey! Back up, now!” one of the officers demanded as they approached. Raphael took a deep breath and slowly lowered himself into his chair, watchful of the officer who stood beside him.

When he nodded calmly to the officer, the large framed man firmly said, “Once more and you’re out.”

Raphael nodded before turning back to Camille. “You’re sick”, he sneered aggressively.

Camille smiled. “Or maybe that’s just you.”

“No”, Raphael said quietly, shaking his head. “No, that’s definitely you. What? Did you think showing me some shitty scar and making up some sob story about some scary mob guy would make me wanna help you?” Raphael laughed obnoxiously. “Please!”

Camille shrugged with a coy smile. “I didn’t make it up, Raphael”, she giggled. “Someone really is out to get Magnus and eventually you’ll figure out that you should’ve trusted me.”

Raphael smiled despite himself. “Oh really?” he scoffed. “After you tried to rape my brother and then rape his boyfriend, you think I would trust you?”

Camille immediately shook her head. “Oh of course not”, she said bluntly. “I wouldn’t expect anything different from you Raphael.”

Raphael frowned, not liking the judgemental tone of her voice. “This is some kind of sick joke. Whatever game you’re playing; stop playing it. This is real life Camille, and shit like this doesn’t happen here.”

“Oh of course not”, Camille snorted. “Al Capone was all a myth and whatnot, as was Frank Costello.”

Raphael rolled his eyes dramatically. “God Camille, get over yourself. You think a mob boss would want anything to do with you, let alone to do with Magnus? Seriously?”

Camille shrugged, grinning. “What can I say? Both us have… well let’s just say we both have links to some pretty powerful people.”

“Links? Like how?”

Camille licked her teeth daringly before taking a deep breath. “Ol’ Magnus has some delightful family members who… let’s just say, my boss is rather close to.”

“Magnus doesn’t have family”, Raphael sneered. “Besides me.”

“Everyone comes from somewhere Raphael”, Camille toyed. “Even you should know that.”

Raphael grit his teeth angrily, forcing himself to remain calm and logical. “You’re full of shit”, he spat.

Camille nodded, grinning like a maniac. “That I am”, she giggled. “But there’s some truth in here too.”

Raphael looked down at his hand for a moment before curling it into a fist. Looking back at Camille, he ignored her playful eyes. “If you were telling the truth, and Magnus did have some… relatives who knew some pretty shitty people… why would they want Magnus? He was adopted, he doesn’t even know his freakin’ family.”

Camille shrugged. “You think he’d tell me?”

“Yeah actually, I do.”

“Well he didn’t”, Camille said simply. “But whatever it is, it’s important enough that he is willing to destroy Magnus’ life just to get it.”

Raphael shook his head, shocked at himself that he was even entertaining her lies. “Magnus doesn’t have anything. And his life is doing just fine.”

Camille smirked. “You’re right. His boyfriend was almost raped though, that isn’t exactly fine.”

“You said ‘he’ didn’t make you attack Alec?”

“Oh he didn’t”, Camille confirmed. “That doesn’t mean he didn’t make me hurt Magnus, does it?”

Raphael took a deep breath as he looked into Camille’s eyes. “Tell me you’re lying”, he demanded.

Camille met his gaze, face serious and calm. “If I did, it’d be lying.”

Raphael bit his lip harshly, feeling the sharp pain as he tore his skin open. Frowning, he quickly wiped away at the blood on his lip. “Why now?” he spat.

Camille grinned slightly, obviously enjoying how easily he caved under her words. “Why not?” she retorted, smile far too playful for his liking.

Raphael kept his eyes locked on hers as he slowly returned the phone to its original spot. Camille watched him, smiling, as he pulled out his chair and calmly stood up. Raphael heard the sound of the officer’s feet as he approached Raphael and before he was led away, Raphael made a point of turning to Camille and slowly raising his finger.

Camille grinned and without missing a beat, returned the gesture.

 

 

….

 

 

“Stop overthinking this”, Alec chuckled as he gently guided Magnus towards Magnus’ – theirs currently – room.

Magnus smirked, tightening his grip on Alec’s hand slightly as he was pulled along. They reached Magnus’ bedroom and Alec turned to smile gently at him, before pulling him once more towards the bed.

“I’m not overthinking it”, Magnus insisted. “I’m being cautious. Last time we did this-”

“-Last time we didn’t talk about it first”, Alec interrupted. “We got caught up in the moment. This time, we’ve spoken about it and we both want this. Right?”

Magnus met Alec’s gaze and watched him for a moment. Looking at the sincerity and love in Alec’s eyes just made Magnus’ heart ache a little bit. Knowing how much love this man had for him, and vice versa, and knowing that he wanted so desperately to show Magnus that love was a tad overwhelming. Considering Magnus hadn’t loved a man in years, hadn’t given himself the chance to.

After a moment, Magnus smiled softly. “Right. But what about the bruising?”

“It’s a lot better, Mags”, Alec insisted. “I’m fine, I promise.”

“Okay.”

Alec could sense the hesitation in Magnus’ voice but knew that Magnus was ready. Alec didn’t doubt that Magnus’ fears were stemming from the intimacy of sex, rather than the act.

Slowly, Alec turned to face Magnus and ever so carefully reached up to let his fingers glide across the collar of his shirt. Magnus quirked a small smile when he saw the dazed look of concentration of Alec’s face.

Alec carefully flicked open the first button of Magnus’ top but froze to toy with it for a moment. “Why did you wear a shirt to work?”

Magnus chuckled quietly. “No lessons today, just paper work”, he said softly.

“You still don’t have to wear a shirt”, Alec teased, undoing one more button.

“Shh”, Magnus laughed as he watched Alec remove his shirt.

Alec smirked and finished unbuttoning Magnus’ shirt. The fabric fell open to reveal a chest that Alec had only had the privilege of seeing a few times. The fabric hung from Magnus’ shoulders, ready to be removed, but Alec left it there.

Magnus smiled softly when Alec looked to him for confirmation and ever so slowly, Alec pushed the material until it fell from Magnus’ shoulder and into a pile on the floor. Alec’s hands remained on Magnus’ shoulders, gently caressing the newly exposed bare skin.

“My turn”, Magnus said tenderly as he reached for the hem of Alec’s shirt. Alec quickly raised his hands above his head, allowing Magnus to easily pull the shirt up and over. When Magnus did so, he dropped the shirt to the floor and immediately let his fingers dance across Alec’s bare skin.

Alec made a small noise of approval as Magnus’ fingers danced across his skin before stopping at his hips. Magnus flattened out his hand and used the leverage to pull Alec towards him. Alec stumbled into his arms, quickly wrapping his hands around Magnus’ neck to steady himself.

Magnus looked between them at the sliver of space between their chests and made a disapproving tutting noise. Alec laughed as Magnus pulled him closer until their chests met and their skin brushed eachothers.

Magnus’ skin felt alight with the contact and he immediately pulled Alec into a kiss to stem his desire.

Alec returned Magnus’ kiss with easily matched passion. Soon enough, Alec gently pushed on Magnus’ shoulder, creating distance between them. Alec let his hand drift slowly down Magnus’ chest, stopping briefly to feel along the definition of his abs. Magnus quirked a smile at that.

When Alec reached Magnus’ belt, he looked up at his boyfriend with questioning eyes.

Magnus took a breath to steady himself before nodding and watching as Alec delicately removed his jeans, dropping to his knees to help Magnus step out of them.

“Wanna stay down there?” Magnus teased as he watched Alec throw the jeans aside.

Alec looked up at Magnus with a grin but it went unnoticed, for Magnus had to look away. Alec on his knees in front of him was far too distracting of a sight.

Magnus quickly pulled Alec to his feet again, something that made Alec chuckle, before he began to unbuckle Alec’s own jeans.

When he flicked open the button however, Magnus froze. Alec looked at Magnus in confusion when Magnus quickly stepped away and headed immediately to the door.

“Magnus! Wai-”

Alec was cut short when, to his surprise, Magnus closed and bolted his bedroom door before turning back to him. Alec spared a thought for how Magnus must have needed a locked door to feel safe and secure, to know that no one would interrupt.

After all the last time Magnus had been interrupted with a man, it had been by Camille.

Magnus approached Alec once more with a blank face. “You think I’d walk out on you? On _this?”_

Alec shrugged but made a point of smiling forgivingly. “I panicked”, he admitted.

Magnus scoffed with a grin. “Y’think?”

Alec rolled his eyes and took a step towards Magnus before taking his boyfriend’s hands and carefully guiding them to his pants’ zip. Magnus met his eye for a moment before slowly unzipping Alec’s jeans. Alec took a deep breath that made his chest heave as Magnus took a hold of his shoulders and gently pushed him backwards.

Alec let out a gasp of surprise as he felt himself fall but almost immediately the soft plush feel of Magnus’ bed caught him. Alec giggled quietly as he looked up at Magnus, who, using the new position to his advantage, pulled off Alec’s jeans.

When the both of them were naked, save for their boxers, Magnus joined Alec on the bed.

Alec quickly shuffled backwards to create room for him until the pair of them were laying across Magnus’ bed near the headboard.

“One more time; are you sure?”

Alec smacked Magnus’ arm playfully. “Yes”, he said firmly. “I am sure. Are you?”

“Yes”, Magnus answered without hesitation. Alec smiled and swiftly drew Magnus into a kiss.

The kiss was long, drawn out and passionate. Magnus used the kiss to express in a most primal way, what he felt for Alec in that moment; a mix of fear, love and lust. Alec responded in kind, similarly latching on to Magnus, reluctant to let him go.

Before the kiss was through, Magnus found his way above Alec, hovering over him as they kissed. Alec, in a daring moment of confidence, wrapped his legs around Magnus’ hips and pulled him closer. The move caused Magnus to lose his footing and he fell against Alec.

Magnus pulled away from their kiss to look down at Alec, only to find him smiling. “Am I not heavy?”

Alec shrugged as best as he could. “Not really”, he said. “It’s kinda nice.”

Magnus smirked, “Oh really?”

“Really”, Alec chuckled. “Now shut up and kiss me.”

“Someone likes to make demands”, Magnus teased. “Tell me Alec, do you like taking orders too?”

Alec’s smile dropped instantaneously and his body became rigid. Magnus quickly drew back to meet his eye.

“What’s wrong?”

Alec shook his head softly. “It’s just… Camille said something similar, that’s all.”

Magnus immediately felt like he had been punched in the gut. Guilt overcame him. “Alec, I am so so-”

Magnus was cut off my Alec’s finger against his lips

“You’re not her”, Alec said firmly, reminding both Magnus and himself. “And I’m not Will”, he added, for Magnus’ benefit.

Magnus nodded, lost in staring at Alec. Looking at this man almost overwhelmed Magnus, for the unimaginable love he felt for Alec in that moment made him speechless. Alec remained unaware and simply smiled at Magnus, which only caused Magnus’ chest to ache just a little more.

“I love you so much, Alexander”, Magnus mumbled breathlessly, as though the very words were a struggle to get out while so preoccupied.

Alec chuckled. “I love you too Magnus. Now, please kiss me.”

Magnus snorted his surprise but, with a laugh, nodded. “I’d be happy to.”

Before long, Magnus and Alec were more than wrapped in each other’s embrace. Alec found himself trapped under Magnus’ weight, powerless to stop the endless stream of kisses and caresses peppered across his skin. Magnus found that, even without Alec’s own moans of approval, the act of leaving hickeys sprinkled across Alec’s pale skin was arousing even for him. Alec writhed on the sheets, squeaking out praises and words of approval with ever kiss and suck of Magnus.

Magnus slowly kissed his way back up to Alec’s lips and stopped. Alec cracked open his eyes to watch as Magnus slowly grazed his fingers across Alec’s boxers. Alec, lost in his desire, nodded urgently.

Magnus chortled quietly as he made short work of removing Alec’s boxers. When he had done so, he froze and took a moment to look Alec over completely.

“You’re beautiful”, he stated.

Alec blushed slightly as he quickly pulled on Magnus’ arm, drawing his attention north.

Magnus smiled at him reassuringly, aware that this moment of vulnerability was hard for Alec, especially so quickly after the attack.

Alec somehow knew exactly what Magnus was thinking and put his fears to rest. “You may not be the first to touch me but you are the first to see me.”

Magnus suspected that Alec’s words when deeper than in just the physical sense but he didn’t say anything. Instead, he quickly removed his own boxers and settled above Alec once more.

This time, when Alec pulled him closer, their moans resonated across the room. They had done such similar things together in the past but never had they laid together, completely bare, and felt each other.

Magnus let his head fall to Alec’s shoulder as he spoke. “This is pretty intense. Ha-Have you ever… er….?”

“Had sex?” Alec chimed in with a spirited grin.

Magnus nodded, a blush overtaking his cheeks. Alec cooed at the sight.

“I already told you I haven't gone all the way but, I have been with people like that”, Alec admitted. “It’s… been a while.”

“Me too”, Magnus admitted. “Several months in fact.”

Alec rolled his eyes. “Try a year.”

Magnus laughed at the look of annoyance on Alec’s face. “Damn”, he chortled.

Alec was quiet for a moment before he asked. “You’ve never had sex with a guy… have you?”

“No”, Magnus admitted immediately. “I wasn’t lying that night at the campfire.”

Alec nodded thoughtfully for a moment. “So you do want to be-”

“Top”, Magus quickly interrupted. “I’m not… ready for _that_ quite yet.”

“Okay”, Alec agreed without hesitation; truth be told although he had never gone all the way, he had been on the receiving end of pleasure. And he his fantasies had always been of a particular nature.. “I’m totally fine with that.”

Feeling nervous with the conversation, Magnus decided to move. He carefully caressed the skin of Alec’s thigh, trailing his hands down to Alec’s knees. Alec let out a brief laugh when he felt Magnus pull at his knees until his feet were planted firmly on the bed, Magnus settled between them.

When Magnus opened his mouth to speak, Alec raised a hand to stop him. “If you ask me if I’m sure one more time”, Alec warned, although not unkindly.

Magnus rolled his eyes. “I was going to ask you to grab the lube from my drawer.”

Alec coughed out a laugh but nodded, reaching over to open Magnus’ top drawer and dig around inside. When he felt what he assume was a tube of lube, he pulled it out.

“And a condom”, Magnus quickly added before Alec closed the drawer.

Alec nodded and resumed his searching until he found a small packet towards the back of the drawer. “How old is it?” he asked sarcastically, teasing.

Magnus chuckled. “It’s fine. Just because I haven’t had sex in a while doesn’t mean I’m not prepared just in case.”

“Okay”, Alec smiled. “Just… as an aside, I know you’ve only been with women but I’m not-”

“It’s okay”, Magnus said abruptly. “I might not have had sex with a man but I have… touched one, let’s put it that way.”

Alec snorted. “Okay”, he laughed.

Magnus grinned before getting back to work, popping open the lid of the lube and pouring a small amount onto his fingers. He hurriedly rubbed them together to warm it before letting his hands fall to Alec’s ass, where he stopped.

“You ready?”

Alec nodded quickly, letting his eyes flutter closed at the feeling of Magnus slowly driving his finger into his body. Alec moaned, unprepared for the arousal he felt at the thought of being this close to Magnus.

Magnus smiled proudly as he began to move, slowly stretching Alec until his noises were exclusively ones of pleasure rather than pain. It took a while, both of them kissing and whispering hushed confessions of love, but eventually Alec was writhing on the bed, four fingers inside of him.

“Magnus”, he gasped. “I’m ready. Please, urgh, please.”

Magnus nodded, feeling dazed and disconnected from his body. He slowly removed his fingers, reaching for the condom with shaky hands. Alec caught his wrist before he touched the packet.

“Are you 100% sure, Mags?”

Magnus looked at Alec for a moment and thought back on every moment they shared together. For months they had been attracted to each other, hiding their feelings or muting them. And now Alec was offering Magnus the opportunity to bare all of his feelings in one simple act.

“Yes”, Magnus promised for the last time. He closed his fist around the condom, bringing it his lips to tear it open.

Alec watched him closely as he prepared himself, put on the condom and spread lube across himself. Alec gently toyed with Magnus’ hair, brushing it from his face as he patiently waited for Magnus to be ready.

After a moment or two, which was long enough for Alec to calm himself down, Magnus was ready and he gently took Alec’s thighs into his hands. Magnus guided himself between Alec’s leg and drew close until he could feel himself at Alec’s entrance, where he stopped.

Alec met Magnus’ eyes and beamed. “I love you”, Alec repeated once more.

“I know”, Magnus laughed.

Within seconds, Magnus' moans and Alec’s whimpers resonated so loudly across the bedroom that Alec felt like the floor was shaking. His legs tightened subconsciously around Magnus, forcing him closer despite the initial pain.

Magnus shouted out, overwhelmed. He had expected something similar to what he had experienced with women but being inside Alec was a completely different story. Alec was clearly enjoying it, for his cries were music to Magnus’ deafened ears.

Magnus collapsed over Alec, hands still holding his legs around his waist. Alec grunted at the movement, his hands scrambling for purchase somewhere, anywhere.

In that moment, Magnus could feel everything; not just physically but emotionally. For every cry and wanton moan Alec released, for every thrust and shift of Magnus’ hips, was a wave of pure, unadulterated love. It washed over Magnus and blinded him to reality. Never before had he felt such immense emotion and his desperation was reflected in the constant drive of his hips.

Alec screamed when he felt Magnus hit that special spot inside of him and every part of his body locked into place, holding Magnus to him to ensure that the next drive of his hips would end similarly. Magnus grunted with the effort it took but dropped his head with a moan as he enjoyed the sensations.

Alec took a moment to think back to Camille and what had happened but found the memories and emotions regarding her, clouded. In his deliriously aroused state, Alec’s mind could not stray and his entire being was surrounded by Magnus. Only Magnus.

Not for a moment did Alec feel regret, nor fear, nor distress. With every thrust, Alec felt new and unknown feelings, each more powerful than the last.

“Alec, I’m- I’m not…”

“I know”, Alec panted directly into Magnus ear, gripping his back tightly.

Magnus felt the distinctive pain of Alec’s nails digging into his back but simply moaned, knowing that that pain was the consequence of Alec’s uncontrollable desire. Knowing that he was the one drawing these sounds, this feeling from Alec, made Magnus shudder.

“I’m close”, Magnus warned as he dropped his hands from Alec’s thighs.

Alec nodded in agreement, tightening his legs around Magnus and shivering as the man in question slowly began to trail his hands under Alec’s back.

Alec gasped in surprise when Magnus pulled him up, hands securely under his back, lifting him as close as possible. The change in positions pulled a scream from Alec as Magnus drove repeatedly into his prostate.

Soon enough their warnings came to pass and both men cried their release. Magnus collapsed on top of Alec with a desperate gasp for air.

“Jesus Christ”, Alec mumbled quietly as Magnus removed himself and fell to the bed beside him.

Magnus nodded in agreement, too caught for breath to talk.

“I… I don’t regret that, at all”, Alec panted.

Magnus smiled. “Me neither. Thank you.”

“For what?”

Magnus used what little energy he still had to turn himself onto his side to face Alec. “For showing me what that is supposed to feel like. That was… amazing.”

Alec beamed at the praise and reached out to pull Magnus into a short-lived kiss. “Thank _you”,_ he said softly. “That was everything I wanted.”

“I love you”, Magnus laughed, with bated breath.

Alec rolled his eyes light-heartedly. “Shut up with that”, he teased. “I already know, damn!”

Magnus gasped, faking offence. “Well screw you Alexander Gideon Lightwood!”

“You just did”, Alec snorted suddenly.

Magnus gaped. “Alec! Who are you?”

“I’m a man who just had sex with the love of his life… I’m freakin’ amazing is who I am.”

Magnus sniggered suddenly. “Yes you are Alec, yes you are”, he said fondly.

 

 

…

 

 

It was around 8 o’clock when the boys were torn from their sleep by the loud, persistent knocking at Magnus’ door.

Magnus woke first, waking abruptly and sitting up. In the meantime Alec, who had previously been wrapped in Magnus’ arms, was jolted awake by the movement.

“Who’s that?” he mumbled tiredly, burying his face in the sheets.

Magnus moaned slightly. “I told Simon to bring Raph over at 8”, he said sadly, looking at the time. “It’s 8.”

Alec groaned deeply. “Why does he need to come over?”

“Because… of stuff. Looks like we have to head back to reality now dear.”

Alec made a disapproving sound but slowly turned over onto his back. “Fine”, he sighed. “But you go and let him in and I’ll take my time.”

“Can you even walk?” Magnus asked coyly as he rose to put his clothes back on.

Alec gave him a look. “You’re not t _hat_ good”, he deadpanned, wiping away the sheets covering his body to sit up.

Magnus made a sound of approval when Alec was bared to him, to which Alec immediately laughed. “Stop perving on me, Magnus”, Alec chastised playfully.

Magnus rolled his eyes as he finished buttoning up his shirt. “If I can’t check you out then who can?”

Alec watched with a fond smile as Magnus rushed over to the bedroom mirror to straighten out his hair and makeup. Magnus quickly snatched up an eyeliner pencil and cleaned up his no doubt smudged makeup. He eventually turned back to Alec with a grin. “Better?”

“Better”, Alec agreed as he threw his legs over the bed to stand.

Magnus headed to the door of the bedroom, shouting at the door that he was coming, when he heard a gasp and a loud thud.

When Magnus turned back to Alec, he found his boyfriend scrambling to pull himself back up onto the bed.

Magnus immediately began to laugh. Loudly.

“Shut up”, Alec growled as he rose unsteadily to his feet. “This isn’t you”, he denied. “It’s just been a while.”

“Keep telling yourself that”, Magnus snorted as he quickly left the room to fetch the door.

 

 

…

 

 

Within the hour, every single one of their friends had shown up at Magnus’ door. Besides Cat, who was due home anyway, everyone from Jace to Clary decided tonight was a good night to barge in.

Besides Raphael, who had seen Alec limp his way in, none of them knew why tonight was a particularly inconvenient night to be visiting.

Clary, Izzy and Cat were all lounging on one couch, with the boys taking the other. Alec and Magnus sat separately in a small armchair, Alec in the seat and Magnus sitting beside him on the arm.

“What does ‘important people’ even mean?” Izzy demanded once again.

Clearly Magnus’ earlier shrug hadn’t answered her questions.

“Why don’t you ask Raphael considering he’s the one who felt it appropriate to visit her today”, Magnus said, nodding to his younger brother.

Raphael glared. “I wanted answers and quite frankly, none of you were getting them.”

Alec sighed. “Raph”, he said softly, drawing his best friend’s attention easily. “You still shouldn’t have gone to her. That’s what she wants.”

“We’ll see her in a few weeks for the trial anyway”, Raphael defended. “And at that point we’ll all have to bare our souls in front of her so why not try and pry some answers out of her before a judge decides to take on that bitches case.”

“I thought Magnus said she already had a lawyer?” Clary piped up.

Magnus quickly shook his head. “She doesn’t have a definite one- she has offers. Why do you think she’s still in jail? She doesn’t have the bail money, or anyone who cares enough to pay it, hence why she also doesn’t have a lawyer yet. But she will do… soon.”

“I thought she did have money? Or connections at least?” Jace asked, confused.

Magnus shrugged. “Obviously her connections and her personal ATM haven’t decided to help her out just yet, I don’t know.”

Raphael watched Magnus warily for a moment, nodding slowly. “Or do you?”

Alec and Magnus both immediately spun to face Raphael. “What’s that supposed to mean?” Alec demanded.

Raphael shrugged blankly. “Why doesn’t Magnus explain, huh? Do you re _ally_ know _nothing_ Magnus?”

Magnus’ eyebrows drew together in confusion. “Are you trying to accuse me of something Raphael? Because I’m basically your brother; don’t doubt me of all people.”

Raphael took a deep breath and looked between Alec and Magnus; even someone completely unaware of what had happened earlier could see the obvious change in both men, they were more relaxed, closer. Their entire bodies just seemed free.

Raphael thought back to Camille, no doubt still locked in a cell, and remembered what he had told her.

“I’m sorry”, Raphael finally muttered. “Camille just said some stuff that got me thinking but I shouldn’t trust her anyway. I’m sorry.”

Magnus frowned slightly. “What did she tell you exactly?”

Everyone in their group remained silent, intrigued by what Raphael was going to say.

Raphael sighed. “She just said some stuff about your parents knowing-”

Raphael was cut off by the startlingly loud banging of the door. Everyone froze for a moment, caught off guard, before Cat finally took a deep breath and rose from her seat.

“I’ll get it”, she said, heading for the door.

Magnus turned to Raphael suddenly. “What the hell are you talking about; my parents?”

Raphael shrugged. “I don’t know, honestly. She was just saying some stuff about how your biological parents know the same people she does and that…. Well, she said some completely BS so it’s not like I believed her but-”

“What did she say Raphael?!”

Raphael exhaled loudly. “She said some shit about someone wanting you gone.”

Alec immediately jumped into the conversation. “What do you mean ‘gone’? Gone how? Like dead?”

Raphael noticed that Alec had become even more pale than Magnus. Magnus remained calm and stone-faced.

“I don’t know”, Raphael shouted. “I have no idea what she meant but she said someone wants something from Magnus and will ruin his life to get it.”

“Ruin it how?” Alec demanded, ignorant of Raphael’s lack of knowledge.

“Magnus!”

Everyone spun to face the doorway, from where Cat’s call had originated.

“Yeah?” Magnus called out.

“Come here, quick.”

 

 

…

 

 

“I’ll get it”, Cat said, heading towards the door.

She left the main room quickly, ignoring the shouting and arguing amongst her friends. Cat felt somewhat left out, detached from the entire situation and helpless to understand. Sure Magnus had explained the gist of it, but this talk of Camille and powerful people was throwing her right off track again.

Cat opened the door as soon as she reached it, perhaps expecting to see Ragnor on the other side.

What she didn’t expect to see was a police officer, proudly decorated in multiple badges.

“Hello”, he greeted somewhat coldly. “Are you Catarina Loss?”

Cat felt her heart race but she nodded.

“Is it correct to say you share this loft with one Mr Magnus Bane?”

Cat took a deep, raged breath and once again, nodded. “Yes, he lives here. Is- Is there a problem officer?”

The officer ignored her, and simply looked behind him to a partner Cat hadn’t even realised he had. “Is Mr Bane currently here?”

“Sure”, Cat mumbled, scared. “I’ll grab him.”

The police officer nodded his thanks silently, watching closely as Cat took a step back to shout down the hall.

“Magnus!”

“Yeah?”

“Come here”, she called. “Quick!”

Turning back to the policemen, Cat watched in fear as one of them shifted towards the door, hand behind their back.

Alarmed, Cat waited for Magnus.

When she finally caught sight of him, he was heading down the hall, Alec following closely, albeit slowly, behind. When he caught up to her he smiled questioningly.

When she nodded in the direction of the cops, Magnus paled immediately.

“What’s going on?” Magnus demanded, looking between Catarina and the police officers.

Alec quickly joined Magnus side, clutching his boyfriend’s hand tightly as he looked upon the officers with fear.

One of the officers quickly stepped forward, the other drawing their hand from behind their back. Cat blanched when she saw a pair of cuffs in his hand.

Cat let out a cry of surprise and fear as the police officers grabbed Magnus, pushing Alec from his side, and threw him up against the wall fast first.

“Magnus!”

“Hey! Stop!” Alec screamed, attempting to pull them off of Magnus.

The second police officer didn’t hesitate to restrain Alec and both Alec and Cat watched in shock as Magnus was cuffed.

“Magnus Bane, you are under the arrest under suspicion for the murder of Miss Camille Belcourt. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to have an attorney present during questioning. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed for you. Do you understand?”

Magnus looked frantically at Alec, eyes wide and wet with tears.

“I understand.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It is officially finished guys... wow. 
> 
> First of all, I'm British so dont really know the US legal system so sorry if anything was wrong there. And any grammatical errors... they're all mine :)
> 
> Now, there are probably many questions and while I'm happy to answer them in the comments allow me to answer a few here :)
> 
> Q: When is the sequel?  
> A: As of right now, there is no specific date I have planned but hopefully in a few weeks (I have school starting up again and so wont have as much time to prepare but it WILL come out). Follow my tumblr (justmagnusbane) where I post updates about the writing and uploading process :)
> 
> Q: What do I do in the meantime?  
> A: Read fanfics from waaay better authors- there are tons! (Recommendation: pending)  
> OR since I have some free time, why not send me a one-shot request, either from this verse or not (maybe a scene you want from a diff perspective or a mentioned event you want in more detail, IDM). 
> 
> Q: What will happen to Magnus?!  
> A: Find out in the sequel
> 
> Q: Wait, Camille is dead?  
> A: please refer to the previous answer ;)
> 
> Q: How could you do this to me?!  
> A: Because I have no soul. 
> 
> Anyway, in all seriousness I really hope you guys enjoyed the story. Be free to add some CONSTRUCTIVE criticism down below and I hope that you guys are okay with where I am starting to take the plot- it is an AU after all :D
> 
> Seriously, ILY all and thank you for all the kudos, shares, comments and bookmarks... it means a hell of a lot. 
> 
> LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THOUGHT DOWN BELOW FOR THE LAST TIME :D xxx

**Author's Note:**

> As of right now I am aiming to post every other day depending on what everyone wants and what I can do.  
> Feedback is really appreciated! :)


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